Hey, I’m Jaye. My initial goal for building this website was to help people like you, who like myself have or are suffering from anxiety and stress. If you really think about it stress is a part of life for all of us. We may not all feel it the same and respond the same but it is there. So this site is for everyone that wants to learn more about stress and how to manage it.
Tips For Reducing Stress In Men
These tips for reducing stress for men are designed to help the modern man cope with the new pressures today’s hectic world has created.
Men deal with stress differently to women.
While a woman may seek help from others and talk about her feelings men are more likely to bottle it up or take up some type of physical activity,
Unfortunately keeping things bottled up if not a good thing. The stress builds up and one way or another it will eventually come to the surface.
The Down Side of Bottling Up Your Feelings
Sense of isolation
Low self esteem
Likelihood of substance abuse
Increased risk of heart attacks
All these symptoms can lead to more serious situations such as suicide or violence. Studies have shown that men are four times more likely to commit suicide than women. They are also more likely to turn to drugs or alcohol for support often leading to violence. With all that built up stress inside this is not surprising news.
Men Shouldn’t Get Stressed, Right?
Little boys are often taught that to be a man you must be strong at all times, be able to cope with every situation and to keep their emotions at bay.
Now these qualities are very admirable and do in a lot of situations help men to get through their life, however where stress is concerned this approach is not always the best one.
But by not facing up to and dealing with problems or feelings of stress, you are simply letting them build up for another day and that day will come.
Ineffective Coping Strategies
Often when men feel stressed they turn to other things to try and numb their anxiety. These things can either put off the inevitable or even make things worse, things such as:
Excessive drinking or smoking
Addiction to sex
When you find yourself turning to these for stress relief you need to stop and re-evaluate your situation and follow the tips for reducing stress.
Tips For Reducing Stress
Ok enough of the why let’s look at the how to cope with stress in your life as a man. Just because you are a man that doesn’t mean that you have to be all macho about it either. Learning to relax is for everyone.
Tackle stress as it comes along; don’t let it fester away in side.
Recognize that you are human and do not have to live up to stereotypes. Being a man means many things including having emotions and feelings and needs.
Admit to your feelings of stress. This could either be to someone else or to yourself. Writing down how you feel can be very therapeutic.
Exercise is a great stress buster as well as keeping you physically healthy.
Cut down on caffeine that can increase your feelings of anxiety and increase your blood pressure.
Have a laugh more often. Sounds silly but having a good laugh actually releases chemicals which help to reduce stress.
Try relaxation exercises or meditation. Don’t worry; no one need know you can do these in the comfort of your own home.
If all else fails seek help from your doctor who can talk you through other coping strategies such as medication or counselling.
Panic attacks used to be a part of my daily life. From about the age of 18 to 25 I suffered from them constantly. What made matter worse for me was I had no idea what they were and what may have caused them. I just assumed I was going mad and coped the best way I could, badly.
This type of anxiety disorder is very common and is a by product of the natural way the body reacts to extreme stress i.e. to prepare to flight or flee.
Just knowing this can be a big help to sufferers, knowing that you’re not going mad but are experiencing a real reaction to stress and that the symptoms are a part of normal physical function.
The Symptoms of Panic
The most common symptoms experienced during an attack are:
Nausea or diarrhea
Rapid breathing as if you can’t breathe properly and are suffocating
Pins and needles, especially in the fingers
Fear of losing control
Ringing in the ears
Feelings of faintness
Sometimes the sufferer may also get pains in the chest leading them to believe they are having a heart attack. It is important to note that if you do experience any of these symptoms that you are properly diagnosed by a doctor, in case there are underlining health issues.
These attacks cannot harm you. After a short period of time it will burn itself out.
What Causes Panic Attacks?
Good question, and one which has no one single answer. It may be due to a period of stress which has built up over time and has developed into panic. It may be caused by feelings of worthlessness, for instance middle aged women are more prone to these attacks and this may be because they feel they no longer have a role in life once the children have left home etc which can be stressful.
Although anyone can suffer from these attacks, it is more common in women. Some women even find that just before a period they can suffer these symptoms, probably caused by low blood sugars which can trigger feelings of anxiety.
Stop Panic Attacks
If you are diagnosed with these attacks it is important to seek help as soon as possible. The main reason for this is that as I found, if left unchecked they can actually cause an attack in themselves. Just the fear of having another attack can trigger one off. So it is important that help is sought to nip them in the bud.
Some doctors will prescribe medication in the short term to help you cope if the symptoms are extreme, while you receive counselling. Just talking to someone you trust can help you overcome them, this can be a close friend or a professional who is trained to deal with this stress. This worked for me, I found someone who I trusted completely and who helped me to learn to face them and overcome them.
Panic Attacks Are Not Forever! They are overcome everyday by people all over the world, including myself. Small steps can take you a long way.
Also learning the correct way to breathe and how to control your thoughts during an attack may also help. They allow you to take back control and the panic attack will subside a lot quicker.
Of course learning and practicing the coping strategies or techniques which suit your personality will also enable you to manage the stress so that panic does not become a part of your problems and take hold.
Claim Back Your Life
Panic attack phobia. When I was about 16 I started to get panic attacks every day, they seemed to have come from nowhere, nothing had triggered them, or at least I wasn’t aware that anything had.
I had had some signs previously that I was an anxious child, often crying at the slightest thing and being very clingy to my parents.
This had seemed to start once I had started junior school, as I do remember being extremely confident as a younger child. So perhaps social pressures had been my trigger or even the pressure from teachers, I can’t be sure.
As I got older I became less and less confident and always felt that I didn’t fit in anywhere as my teens wore on, the anxiety increased and the panic attacks began.
The attacks were terrible and in the end I actually became phobic about the attacks themselves, to the extent that I used to trigger them off myself.
I knew that evening times were the times my anxiety became worse and because of this I used to dread the evenings.
This dread turned to anxiety and yep the next panic attack was triggered. It was a daily occurrence which knighted my life for many years and stopped me enjoying my teen years.
Being so young and feeling very isolated I did not seek help. My parents seemed to treat me like I was mentally ill and I don’t remember them ever really trying to help me, I guess they didn’t understand what was happening and put it down to being a teenager. I don’t blame them for this but I do wish that there had been someone in my life then that could have helped me understand what was happening to me.
It is common for people who suffer anxiety attacks to think that they are going mad and there is no way or out for them.
I know I did, I assumed that I would suffer these terrible frightening attacks for the rest of my life and that I would never be happy, I even turned to alcohol to try and calm me down.
Twenty five years on and now a trained stress advisor I look back at those times with sadness. I lost so much of my youth to anxiety and only wish that there had been more help available then. Luckily anyone suffering today has so much more support available, from the internet, social support groups and from stress and health advisors who are far more able to provide effective help.
Learning to cope with stress and find relaxation is far easier to do effectively with the amount of information freely available to everyone.
If you are suffering panic and anxiety attacks, I urge you not to let them take over your life and waste so many happy times. I eventually grew out of my attacks as I moved into adulthood and found a very supportive partner, but I lost many years to anxiety. Don’t be like me, seek help now.
Stressful life events happen to all of us everyday. By understanding what causes your individual stress you can learn to manage it and avoid illness.
How we respond to different stimuli and how we see and cope with certain situations is also very individual.
Follow along and think about how you react to these situations and how you can better prepare yourself for them in the future.
Life Events And Stress
So do you know if you are vulnerable to stress related illnesses at the moment? To find out simply look down this list and tot up your score. (This list and scoring is based on research carried out in 1967 by Holmes and Rahe)
Death of partner 100
Divorce or separation 75
Major illness or injury 70
Loss of a job 70
Imprisonment or conviction 70
Death of someone else 60
Marital reconciliation 60
Illness or injury in close family 50
Marriage or moving in with partner 50
Moving home or major renovation 50
Escalation of arguments with partner 45
Changing jobs or new jobs 45
accident or Trauma 45
Changes at work/ more demands 35
Outstanding personal achievement 35
caring for an elderly or sick relative 35
problems with family etc 35
Financial worries 35
Examinations or speaking in public 30
Changes in social activities 30
Changes in recreational activities 30
Children moving away from home 30
PMT or menopause 30
Starting a new relationship 30
Family gatherings 20
Over 280 – High vulnerability to a stress related illness.
130 – 280 – Moderate vulnerability
Below 130 – Low vulnerability
Even if your score is high it is not inevitable that you will suffer illness, it very much depends on how you cope with these difficult situations in your life.
There is one certainty in this life and that is at some time or another all of us will experience bereavement. It’s unavoidable and is often accompanied with feelings such as;
These are all normal reactions and are natural part of the grieving process. So having these feelings should not be make you feel weak or ashamed, they are what make you human.
It goes without saying that times of bereavement are extremely difficult, so reducing the affects will help you get through these periods in your life.
Learn stress relief techniques to help you cope and help bring a little control back into your emotions. Learning how to write an obituary to get all of your feelings out and share your good memories, or learning how to talk about your feelings of loss, can all help you move on with your life.
Big changes, little changes, changes which are sudden and those which are gradual, happen to us all every day. Some we cope with without a second thought, other more major changes can completely throw us off course.
Change affects us because it alters our normal routines, it could:
Change our sleeping pattern – new parents for instance
Change our eating habits – change in job hours .e.g. night watchman
Change our exercise routines – a more sedentary job
Although these changes can affect us in the short term they can all be managed and so reduce any stress related illness. Planning ahead for such changes can greatly reduce any short term stress also.
The secret is to learn how to adjust to changes in your life when they occur. By altering how you view change in your life will reduce any stress affects you may have experienced when these unavoidable situations occur.
Tips On How To Prepare For Change
1. See change as an opportunity rather than a negative thing. In most cases there is always an upside, focus on these.
2. Learn how to delegate more when change happens which puts pressure on you.
3. Make sure you look after yourself during periods of change. Eat well and exercise.
4. If you know changes will happen in the future, find out as much as you can now about what they are and how they will affect you. This way you will be able to prepare yourself in advance for them.
5. Don’t bottle up your fears and worries about changes, express how you feel to others and let them know how you propose to cope with them. This way you will feel as if you are not alone during these possible periods.
Holidays should be fun and exciting shouldn’t they? Whether you are going away to some far flung destination or your family are visiting for the annual Christmas feast, stress can rear its ugly head.
Why Can Holidays Make You Tense?
Expectation that they will be happy occasions. This alone can be emotionally taxing.
Being alone during times of celebration can make you feel low and out of step with the world.
Routines change, eating habits change, all these small changes will affect you physically and could make you feel unwell, which will cause stress as your ability to cope may be affected.
So What Can You Do To Help Reduce These Affects?
1. Take your time in planning for the holidays; don’t leave it all to the last minute.
2. Make time for yourself; get away from it all for a short while. A breather from the noise etc may be all you need to relax and enjoy the celebrations.
3. If you are alone find someone or somewhere you can visit. You’ll be surprised just how many people are alone at times like Christmas and who would relish having someone around.
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Stress at work
Let It All Out
Stress at work is a common problem and for many it is something they have to put up with on a daily basis. But as we all know work stress, like any form of stress can cause more serious illnesses in the long run if left to build up.
One of the best ways to find some stress relief is to let it all out and get it off your chest. That’s why many people turn to a counsellor for some stress relief sessions. Well that’s great if you have the time and the money to do this, but for many of us this just is not possible
So, the next best thing is to get all your work stress off your chest and out into the open by writing it all down. You have the opportunity to do this here.
There are many advantages to this:
It feels great when you are pouring it all out
It is a useful document to look back on and reflect on the actual problems.
It is useful to other people who are suffering work stress as they will know that they are not alone.
You may think that there is no point in writing down your stress at work rant but studies have shown that because writing something down is a more purposeful action than just talking about something that it actually helps your own mind work through your issues and problems and helps to make things clearer.
Stress and anxiety can make decision making very difficult sometimes, especially at work. this is why a lot of people find themselves stuck in the same job for years and years because they are highly stressed and have not been able to spend some real time thinking about their situation and exploring other possibilities which could improve their situation.
So let’s go.. let out all of your stress at work
So here is your chance to do just that, get all that stress out into the open, I bet you will feel better straight away and don’t worry no one will know who you are. All I ask is that you don’t use swear words or if you do you use asterisks to express your frustrations.
Get It Off Your Chest
Do you have stress at work? Then why not tell us about it.
What is it that makes you feel stressed?
How does it make your feel and affect you?
Have a rant if need be for some therapeutic stress relief.
If you need a more structured guide to help you let it out and write down what is causing you stress I invite you to look at my free 5 days to happiness e-course. This quick 5 day email course is to get you thinking and release some of that tension.
Workplace stress can sometimes be caused because we simply do not really know what our job role is.
Now this may sound a little odd but believe me I know of many people who go to work every day not really sure if they are doing what they should and if one day it’s all going to come back on them.
The simple answer of course would be to check with your boss. But often people do not want to do this for fear of looking foolish or unprofessional.
This is a mistake and if approached correctly can actually make you appear to be enthusiastic and confident.
Job appraisals were actually put into place for this very reason, to help clarify the employee’s job role and also to ensure that they were able to carry out their tasks, providing extra training where needed.
However many managers hate doing appraisals, they take up time, they can even be a little difficult sometimes. So sometimes they are put off and off.
This is a mistake though; I should know I was that manager once. In the end I found that staff appraisal were a good way to give my staff positive feedback which used to actually increase their work turnover and reduce workplace stress.
So if you are not getting regular appraisals, make the first move and book yours. They really can be a great way to clear the air and make things better.
This can be another area of uncertainty and job stress for employees and managers alike. Suddenly you have a new company over you who may have different expectations of you. This can really make you feel threatened and worried for your job.
In some cases it can take months before the new company actually confirms your new role in the company and this time can be a period of extreme stress, not only due to the uncertainty but also the last of actual work in some managerial cases.
Again seeking a meeting with your new boss early on is better than waiting to find out sometime.
The Bonus Culture
The bonus culture is a new cause of workplace stress in recent years. Companies are feeling the pressure of competition and are pushing their staff to work harder and for longer hours.
Unfortunately the pressure of trying to meet targets all the time will eventually catch up with employees if not managed properly. This is often why people in highly stressful target led jobs can only do it for a few years before they burn out.
Being responsible for other members of staff can be one of the most stressful roles within a company. You not only have responsibilities to the companies to make a profit etc but you also have to be responsible for hiring and firing and this is never easy.
One of the most stressful times in my life was when I was a manager of a team. I felt like I was trying to keep everyone happy, with no thanks and often coming out the worst. In the end I decided that I really wasn’t the right person for the job and left. The pressure was seriously affecting my health and I could see no way out other than to get out.
Workplace Stress Busters
One of the main lessons I learned from being a manager, was that if you can make your staff feel engaged and respected they will work harder. The best way to do this is through encouragement and opportunities. Encourage your workplace to:
Provide career development by developing staff skills.
Arrange in-house seminars and workshops.
Pay for external courses.
Ask their staff for feedback and suggestions for further development.
Give staff more responsibility of to head up special projects from time to time.
Another good option is to provide your staff with information on how to relax at work for themselves and give them options and space to do this if they wish. It really will improve work productivity if your staff are happy and not stressed. Allowing work stress toys to be used in the office is also a good moral booster.
Work Environment Stress
The work environment can be one of the biggest causes of stress for workers.
Whether you are a factory worker, working in noisy, hot places or an office worker in small cramped offices, it can all lead to a build up of stress on the workers.
Unfortunately in many cases there is not much that can be done, a factory worker can’t demand that the machines be turned off because they are too noisy.
However there are always ways that things can be made more bearable and comfortable for the workers. So it is always worth speaking to management and making suggestions as to how things can be improved.
The Main Work Environment Stressors
There are five main areas which are the biggest causes of workplace stress, they are:
Air conditioning and central heating
It is important that our working environment is not to hot or too cold to work in and so the installation of air conditioning and central heating systems is the norm. However these items in themselves can cause their own problems. Air conditioning systems re-circulate air and so it is not surprising that others things also get circulated such as:
Central heating although great for keeping the office warm will also dry the air out and this over time can affect our brains and cause us to become tired and less able to do our work.
TIP: Try to use natural ventilation whenever possible rather than using air condition, open windows and let new air enter the building.
Continuous back ground noise can become very wearing after a while and cause stress to build up. Factory workers are able to wear ear defenders to help reduce the level of noise but what about all those ringing telephones and whirring photocopiers?
TIP: make sure that office equipment is placed away from workers desks, in a separate room if possible. Also ensure that telephones rings can be turned down and that office screens are placed around desks to reduce overall noise.
There are not many work places where there isn’t one sort of computer or VDU screen around. Physical effects of stress such as eye strain, neck ache and back pain can all be caused by long periods in front of a computer.
Tip: Ensure that you have the correct chair and desk for your situation and that you have been trained how to sit correctly in front of a computer. Also remember to stand up and stretch every 20 minutes, look out of a window or into the distance to help with eye strain.
In the work environment often one of our biggest problems is space or the lack of it. However we are also affected by things such as office layout, personal space and privacy. Too isolated and we feel lonely, too cramped and crowded and this too will make us feel stressed.
TIP: Plan workspaces and allow personalization of areas i.e. potted plants and photographs. Provide some comfy seating areas for breaks and some partitions for privacy but not too many to cause isolation.
Sitting in a dimly lit office all day can eventually cause eyestrain, it won’t be comfortable to work in and will make you feel tired and demoralized. Humans respond better to full spectrum lighting, similar to daylight. It will help to create an atmosphere of alertness and calm, helping with productivity.
Are you feeling job stress? Maybe your job is not the right one for you.
Job Stress is not an uncommon factor in many of our lives, but do you ever wonder if it’s not actually the job that is stressful but the fact that your personality is not right for it?
The answer to a more relaxed working life could be that you find a job which suits your personality better.
After all if you don’t like driving you wouldn’t want to be a taxi driver or if you’re someone who is afraid of spiders you wouldn’t want to work in the reptile house at the zoo.
Perhaps it’s time to really look at your job and your own personality and see if there is a mismatch which could be causing your job stress.
Is your job stress high?
Some jobs are simply more stressful than others and that’s just the way it is. So it’s important that people who are doing those jobs are more able to cope with these high levels of workplace stress.
They will be able to do their work better but will also be less likely to be affected mentally or physically by the work stress involved.
Let’s take a look at some examples of different types of jobs with different sorts of pressures but all can cause high levels of stress.
High Stress Jobs
Nurses and Doctors – Long hours and lots of pressure
Police and Firemen – Danger involved
Traffic Warden – Nobody likes you and you can face abuse on a daily basis.
Actors – Job uncertainty, irregular work
Office workers – many are low paid and have little control over their daily work
Bar staff and waiters – low pay long unsociable hours
Teachers – pressure to meet targets and a heavy workload for little pay
Factory workers – unpleasant working conditions, excessive noise etc .
Now let’s take a look at some jobs where job stress is less of an issue
Lower Stress Jobs
Gardener – working outside and control work done
Librarian – Quiet job
Museum worker – little time pressures
Craft worker – Often doing work they enjoy and which is creative
Farm Laborer – do not have the same pressures as the farmer
So Which Job Are You?
Not being able to cope with a high stressed job is by no means something you should be ashamed of, it simply means that your particular personality is not suited to it. After all we are not all the same and what a dull world it would be if we were.
Our personality test shows you what sort of person you are, so take a look at the sort of work you do and see if there is a mismatch. If you come to realise that your job does not suit your personality and you are experiencing high levels of stress which you are finding hard to cope with, then it could be time to rethink your work options.
As an example:
If you have a personality that craves excitement and action on a regular basis, it is very unlikely that you will be happy working in a library and even though the work itself is not very stressful it will cause YOU stress very quickly.
If you have a personality that likes to be quiet and work alone, then being a nurse or policemen is probably not the right job for you.
Of course it is not always possible to simply change jobs but if you are aware that your work is causing you job stress because it’s not right for you, then perhaps you can start to plan for the future. Perhaps take some courses to re-train for something else, or keep an eye out for jobs which would be better suited to you.
Anxiety, stress and depression can be caused by many factors and knowing what these factors are will help you to avoid falling into a deep depression, which can creep up unexpectedly.
Some of the main factors which can cause stress and depression are:
Disruption of chemicals in the body such as serotonin, noradrenalin and dopamine by stress.
Lack of self confidence and self esteem
Unable to express yourself properly causing frustration and stress
Negative thinking or incorrect beliefs, causing worry
Learned depressive behavior from a family member or close frien
Excessive change in life situation
Grief or loss
What is depression?
Although depression is not only caused by stress and anxiety. Stress, anxiety and depression are linked and are often experienced together at some time or another.
Someone with depression may have a hard time describing their symptoms and explaining how they feel. It can so easily be dismissed as someone just feeling sorry for themselves. Depression has many causes and should not be confused with just having down days. When depression does strike it may be the result of long term periods of anxiety, stress and pressure.
Depression strikes at least 1 in every 8 men and 1 in every 5 women throughout life and so is one of the most common yet undiagnosed illnesses.
The reason many sufferers do not have it properly diagnosed is because they may see it as a weakness i.e not being able to cope with life’s pressures.
The symptoms of depression are so varied and can differ from one person to the next.
If you or someone you know is experiencing symptoms of anxiety, stress and depression it should be of concern and you seek medical help.
Depression, to provide a brief description, is essentially a prolonged period of low mood. We all go through many different moods throughout our life, but they are rarely constant. It is only when a low mood becomes a permanent state that it is classed as depression. Feelings of being miserable or sad for one day is not and should not be called depression.
When stress and anxiety are prolonged causing disruption of the body’s chemical balance and causing the persons general mood to be low more often than not, this is when anxiety depression kicks in.
Symptoms of anxiety depression
Here are the most common and important signs and symptoms which constitute a depressed state.
Low mood every day for a long period of time
Do not enjoy anything anymore have lost the sense of pleasure in anything you do
Significant weight gain or weight loss or loss of appetite
Problems sleeping on a regular basis
Feeling tired all the time, have a real lack of energy
Stress and depression, who is more prone to symptoms?
Basically anyone who experiences high levels of extreme stress for a prolonged period of time can fall prey to depression. However there are groups of people who seem to be more vulnerable to this type of depression.
Figures from a survey carried out in 2001 for the mental health Foundation have indicated that in Britain, 46% of male students and 64% of female students experienced depression.
Possible causes are:
Lack of exercise
Excessive drug and alcohol use
Around 1 in 5 elderly people suffer from depression, this is slightly higher for those who live in residential care homes.
Possible causes are:
Loss of partner
Side effects of medication
Being unemployed is an extremely stressful period in anyone’s life and in Britain it has been constantly shown that around 40% suffer from depression.
Feelings of worthlessness
Boredom and lack of stimulation
Pressure from family members
Stress and depression, ways to fight it
Of course tackling the root cause of your stress and implementing stress relief strategies is a major to do if suffering from anxiety depression. However there are certain things you can do to tackle your actual low mood.
Make a to do list for every day. This may only consist of one thing, such as do the washing or call a friend. But forcing yourself to do at least one thing a day will help break your lethargy and will boost your self esteem. I.e. you achieved something and you can put a big tick next to it on your list.
Keep a diary. Write down everything you do and note down how much you enjoyed it or not. Then read back and try to do more of the things that you enjoyed the most.
When thinking negative thoughts, write them down and challenge them. As yourself if they are really true or not. Never keep your feelings to yourself. Talking through how you feel with someone is the first step on your path to recovery.
Try to keep active, exercise a little more each day. This will help to raise your mood enhancing chemicals in your brain.
Some additional self help tips to fight against stress and depression
Don’t let your appearance slip even though you may feel there is no point. Letting yourself go can lead to further depressed feelings.
Break daily tasks down into small pieces
Reduce amounts of fats, salt, caffeine and alcohol in your diet
Take regular exercise as this helps to produce natural anti depressant chemicals in the brain.
Increase your daily intake of B Vitamins. these come from whole grains, soya and oily fish. Nutrition is very important when the body is under stress.
Try to keep social, don’t shut yourself away from people. Regular communication will help lift your mood.
Women At Work:
Don’t Let Stress Get You Down
Women at work not only have to cope with all the normal work stress and pressures, they can also have outside issues which can increase their levels of stress and ultimately affect their performance at work.
This page and related pages highlighted will cover many issues which affect women in particular at work and which can often be over looked as a reason for stress and anxiety in the long term.
Do read through all the related pages as you may be unaware of just how these other issues can be affecting your stress levels.
Women of course have to put up with other external factors in their lives which can add to the affects of stress at work, things such as:
Single parenting stress
Women are far more likely to be affected by hormonal issues on a monthly basis which can only add to their overall levels of stress they are feeling at work. This can make it harder for the working women to get to the top of her profession, not only having to be as good as her male counterparts but having to cope with these added pressures too.
Success or the fear of success is also an issue for women at work, let me explain.
Females are often brought up to be non-aggressive and less likely to achieve high status in life, expected instead to be more nurturing and caring then men.
This expectation is ingrained from an early age and so by the time a woman goes to work, there is a natural conflict with being ambitious and aggressive enough to achieve high status at work alongside her male counterparts. This causes conflict which leads to stress and anxiety.
This could be why there are not so many women at the top and that the ones who are, show more male attributes such as aggression, ambition and even anger at times. It takes a lot to remain feminine but strong enough to compete in the work arena to achieve top success.
Once a certain level of success has been achieved there may be other problems which arise and causes further stress and anxiety, managing people for instance. Because females are not brought up to be particularly assertive or authoritative, it can sometimes prove to be difficult to manage other people. A conflict between having to be a manager and being in control and the female attributes of being caring and nurturing can occur and this conflict can cause much anxiety if not managed.
Learning to be in control and professional when in the work environment and then being more feminine at other times is often key to reducing stress. When I was a manager, I found that I thought of myself as a manager and not as a woman when in the board meetings with mostly men. That way I could say and do things which may not be particularly femanine but were professional and I think I learned a lot of respect for this. It was also very empowering for me and I think other women at work could certainly get a great deal from this approach too.
TIPS: Women At Work Breaking The Conflict
Make sure you are fully informed and have all the information at your fingertips when needed.
Think of yourself as a manager first and a women second.
Have set goals for your job and go for them.
Sexism: Women At Work
Sexism at work can still be a problem for some women. It is often hard to prove and difficult to get past. The glass ceiling syndrome for women at the top is bending slightly and we can only hope that it will shatter soon.
Sexism and sexual harassment at work can cause all sorts of stresses, from fear and anger to resentment and loss of self confidence. However there are things you can do to try and overcome these issues.
Speak to any individual who is making you feel uncomfortable. Do it when alone and in a calm and controlled way. Explain the situation and see how they respond. In some cases the man may be unaware that his actions are making you feel uncomfortable, in others you may meet with ridicule but either way, you have expressed your feeling and that is a positive step.
Keep a diary of any events that happen, this may be needed in the future if things get to the stage of reporting them.
To speak to other female colleagues, it may be happening to others in which case you will have a stronger case. If not then the support of another women may be enough for you to overcome the situation yourself.