If you want to be sure you’re not wasting your time with women who aren’t interested in you, then it’s very important to learn all the main signs she’s not into you.
You see, not all women will tell you directly if they’re not interested in you at all.
If they did, it would save everyone lots of trouble and frustration. And you’d be able to move on with your life and go talk to other women instead.
Unfortunately, most women won’t be so direct, for one reason or another. They’ll either be very subtle about it or simply hint that they’re not that into you. And it’s up to you to figure this out and decide if you should pursue them further or not.
That’s why learning all the signs she’s not interested in you is so important. So you don’t waste your time with the women who don’t like you.
I’ll also show you what to do after you notice these signs because you may be able to salvage the situation. So pay attention!
The biggest signs she’s not into you
I don’t want to waste your time, so I won’t mention the most obvious signs a girl is not into you. Like when she just flat out tells you “I’m not interested in you!” or tells you to “Fuck off and never contact me again!”
Instead, here are the most important signs she doesn’t like you that much.
1) She always tells you she’s busy
So here’s the deal: If a girl always tells you she’s busy, no matter what, then she’s not interested in you at all.
That’s because if she were actually interested in you, she’d definitely find the time to meet you. No matter how busy her schedule looks. No matter how much work, school, errands or chores she has.
You see, it’s a simple fact of life that when someone wants something, they make the time for it.
Women will always find the time for guys who they want and find very attractive!
So next time you notice women constantly give you this excuse. Take it as a huge sign that they’re just not that into you. Probably because you didn’t really make a good impression on them when you first approached and talked to them.
Because if you don’t know how to approach and get numbers from womenthe right way. They’ll often give you their number just to get rid of you. And then either ignore you, block you or, in this case, always tell you they’re BUSY doing something (or someone) else.
No matter the reason, take the hint she doesn’t want to make time for you because she’s not interested anymore and move on.
Although, you could try contacting her again in a couple of weeks or a month, just to give it a shot. Some women will change their minds. Some may think you’re more attractive because you’re not being needy or desperate by texting them every day. It can’t hurt.
2) She’s doesn’t reply to your messages
Telling you she’s always busy is just the first sign that she’s not interested in you.
But when a girl ignores your messages completely, then she’s definitely not into you.
This ghosting can happen through anything: texting, social media like Facebook, on Snapchat, Instagram DMs, etc.
The most hurtful one of all is probably the Facebook “seen” notification.
She’s read what you’ve had to say and chose not to reply to you. Basically letting you know she has no intention or interest in talking to you at all. And no matter how many messages you send, there’s no reply.
When this happens, I suggest you don’t make yourself look like a desperate and lonely fool. Don’t send her message after message, begging her to talk to you. Because that’ll only make things worse.
That’s because the situation can sometimes be salvageable, even if she ignores you completely at this point.
To do that, you simply go on with your life and meet and talk with other women. And after a while, once you remember her, send her an intriguing, witty, provocative or funny message. To see what happens next and if she still ignores you.
Sometimes, due to various reasons, she might reply back. Either because what you said was genuinely intriguing. Or because she’s lonely and has changed her mind, or something else entirely. And that can spark some interest from her and you’ll have another conversation.
But if you continuously barrage her with messages, even though she doesn’t reply. Then she’ll never want to meet or talk with you again. Because you’ll be annoying her and will be showing severe attention-seeking behavior. Which is totally not attractive.
This happens if you’re interested in a girl who you see often. Either because you’re both in high-school, college, at the gym or even your work. But she’s not interested in you anymore.
You may have hit it off at first and thought it would be a good idea to exchange numbers and maybe even go on a date. But something must’ve happened in-between that time and she’s giving you all the signs she’s not interested anymore.
In this case, she’ll do her best to avoid you. She’ll go somewhere else when you enter the room, she’ll try to not be in your vicinity as much as possible. And she’ll do her best not to run into you.
Other than that, if seeing you or meeting you in the same room is unavoidable (which is often the case if you have class or work together). Then she’ll just ignore you as much as possible.
She might put her headphones on when you try to talk to her and just stare at her work blankly. And if she’s in a group of people, she might deliberately ignore anything you’re saying, focusing on her friends or colleagues instead. There’s also no eye contact from her, at all!
If this happens, your best course of action when you see these signs she’s not into you is to not make it worse.
That’s because if you’re in a social setting where there’s lots of people around, you can easily ruin your image and reputation. If you act in a creepy, weird, needy or pathetic way.
In these highly visible social settings, take rejection like a man and don’t follow her around or annoy her. Because things may not end well if she decides to announce to everyone you’re being a desperate creep.
4) She tells you she has a boyfriend
A lot of the time, if a girl is not into you, she’ll tell you she has a boyfriend.
Now, this may be true and it may not. But you should still definitely take the hint that she wants to get rid of you.
But trust me on this one; it’s not really worth it to try and argue with women whether they’re lying about having boyfriends or not. Because either way, it means they’re not attracted to you and aren’t interested in you.
If you do argue, at best you’re going to look like a clueless guy, which isn’t very attractive. And at worst, you’re going to look like a total fucking idiot who can’t take no for an answer.
Oh, and for the love of all that’s decent. If she tells you she has a bf, don’t say you just want to be friends with her, in the hopes of ever getting into her pants.
Being in the friendzone sucks, first and foremost. And second, you’ll be effectively lying to her and trying to manipulate her into sleeping with you by hanging around and acting nice.
Not only is that unattractive, it shows you have low self-respect and self-esteem.
5) She just wants to be friends
One of the absolute biggest signs she’s not into you is when she puts you in the dreaded friend zone.
This can happen for many different reasons and I’ll explain it all in great depth in my upcoming article on The Friend Zone.
However, to mention the biggest reasons briefly.
She’s put you in the friendzone either because you were too afraid of rejection so you didn’t make your move. Or because you weren’t flirting with her the right way, didn’t tease her to create massive attraction, weren’t challenging enough, etc. So she didn’t find you attractive at all and didn’t consider you as a lover.
Basically, you probably didn’t do anything to make her want you. So all she sees you as is a sexless friend.
To get out of this friendzone, you need to learn how to attract a woman so she’ll want you sexually. You also need to treat her differently than before. Then show her you have other women in your life who want you. And then create some much-needed sexual tension between you two.
You’ll accomplish this better if you focus on self-improvement. By hitting the gym to get fit (if you aren’t), by living a life she’d want to be a part of, by dressing well and grooming yourself properly. By getting rid of various insecurities and self-esteem issues, etc.
These things aren’t as important as learning how to flirt and attract women. But they’re definitely incredibly helpful and will make you significantly more attractive to women in general.
And you should be striving to improve yourself all the time anyway. Because you only have one life. So it’s a win-win for everyone involved if you strive to achieve all the things above.
6) She doesn’t want to meet you one on one
So let’s say you’ve gotten her number and you started to text or talk with each other regularly. Or you may have met her through online dating and you’ve hit it off. So you’ve been chatting for weeks, getting to know each other.
Everything seems great and you’re both enjoying talking to one another for quite a bit. But once you ask her to meet you somewhere. She either says no (because she wants to get to know you even better before meeting you, which is the most common excuse) or she says something along the lines of “Maybe later . . .” or “We’ll see . . .”
This is one of those more subtle signs of a girl not interested in you. Because she clearly enjoys talking to you, but not enough to want to meet.
She either doesn’t trust you. Or maybe she’s getting enough attention and validation from you through chatting with you. And you haven’t really attracted her enough to compel her to see you face to face.
If this happens, your best course of action is to make your communication with her increasingly sparse. By this, I mean you should talk to her less and less. Until you eventually only speak to her very occasionally.
In fact, this is where you could and you should turn the whole “I’m busy” thing right back on her.
Talk to her less and less and say you’re busy doing one thing or another.
That’s because for her to realize she wants you, she has to start missing you. And if you’re always busy doing cool stuff and meeting other women, she’ll become interested in you.
She might even get jealous and will want you all to herself. That’s why mentioning you’re seeing other women is good.
7) She keeps cancelling plans to meet
Something that’s even more frustrating and annoying than her not wanting to meet you is when she actually agrees to meet you. But then keeps canceling on those plans at the last minute or doesn’t show up at all. And not just the one time but constantly.
Sure, unexpected things can happen and sometimes life gets in the way. So it’s understandable if she can’t come and at first, you should always give her the benefit of doubt. Because people don’t usually lie about stuff like that.
But if she keeps repeating the same thing again and again, and keeps cancelling on your plans or doesn’t come at all. Then it means she’s not into you and is either playing you for a fool. Or she’s just mean and has no regard for other people’s time and effort.
So what’s the limit on how often you should tolerate her canceling plans?
Well, it depends on a few things. Mostly, on whether she actually suggests alternative plans when she cancels. Which is a huge sign she actually does want to meet you.
But normally, the “Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me” approach is often best.
I cut women who do this off after two times they do it. Very rarely do they get a third chance to make things right, and only if they’re super convincing.
That’s because you have to stand up for yourself, have clear boundaries and not let people use and abuse you. Otherwise, no women will respect you or find you attractive after a while.
So when she does this more than once, take it as her giving you signs she’s not interested anymore and cut her out of your life. Because flakiness is bad and she’ll keep flaking.
8) She contacts you only when she needs something
If you’re keeping contact but not really dating because you can’t seem to meet her for a date, then the following sign she’s not that into you is very telling.
It’s when she only texts, calls or messages you when she needs something from you. And not to meet you for a date or to hang out.
This can be anything; maybe she needs a ride, maybe she wants some foor, or maybe she wants you to take her somewhere and pay for it.
If something like this happens, be more assertive and stand up for yourself. Don’t let her use you as a personal driver or food guy, or furniture mover, or whatever. Cut her out of your life and move on to other women.
That’s because she’s being manipulative and trying to get stuff from you since she knows you like her. But since she doesn’t really like you back and is not interested in you romantically, she thinks she can keep you on as a “friend” and keep getting free stuff or favors from you.
In that case, give her the boot and be glad to never see her again.
There are far too many women in the world who abuse guys and even use them only for money. Don’t be a CHUMP!
9) She constantly talks about other guys with you
This can be due to many different reasons.
The first and the best case for you is if she’s shit-testing you once again. To see if you’ll be discouraged by this and to test your resolve and strength of character.
The second reason is because you’ve been friend zoned. So she’s talking to you like she would with one of her girl friends, and discussing guys with you. Probably because she wants your advice (and not your dick) on what to do with these guys. And she doesn’t consider you to be a candidate for a lover at all.
The third reason is she wants to give you a clue and hint that she’s not interested in you at all. And by talking about other guys, she wants to deter you from even trying to ask her out. Because you’ll think she already has plenty of other men in her life or even a boyfriend.
This is particularly the case if she mentions about having sex and with other men. And talks about that stuff openly, describing all the naughty stuff they’re doing.
If this happens, take it as one of the surest signs she’s not into you at all and move on. Because it’s not suddenly going to get any better. Unless you’re very good at getting out of the sexless friend zone and making her see you in a different light, as a potential lover.
10) One of the worst signs she’s not interested is when she goes on a pity date with you
Pity dates are something some women do to discourage guys from trying again.
You’ll be able to recognize if it’s a pity date by how she acts on it. She probably knows you’re super interested in her from the start, but she isn’t really interested in you. And she’ll seem standoffish and bored. Probably staring at her phone all the time, look around for stuff to do and will refrain from looking in your eyes.
However, pity dates are not really that common and..
I’m sure you’ve had this terrible experience before: You’re going about your day and minding your own business, doing various chores, studying or even working . . . and you cross paths with many different and attractive women throughout the day. But for some reason, all the girls seem to ignore you like you’re invisible. Especially the girls you find attractive and really like . . . Which is really frustrating and sad, isn’t it? And that’s why I’ll show you how to get girls to notice you more, so you don’t have this problem anymore.
Being ignored by women is a very common experience for a lot of guys. Which is why learning how to get a cute girl to notice you more than other men is something that’s going to help you a lot in your dating life.
Because it sure sucks when it looks like every other guy is getting attention and you’re always being left on the side, overlooked and passed over. Like there’s something wrong with you or you have a stamp on your forehead that says “Stay away!”
So screw that feeling and listen up: Make sure to read every word below because I’ll reveal the best ways of getting women you find attractive to notice you when you go about your daily life.
This will help you get more opportunities to meet women. And some women will even start approaching you and introducing themselves to you instead.
The secrets of how to get a girl to notice you are in your body language
I’ll get straight to the point: If you want women to really notice you, you need to develop strong, confident and attractive body language.
And after women start noticing you more, you need to use your eye contact in specific ways. To make it known you’ve noticed them as well and to invite them to come over and talk to you. Or to let women know you’re going to approach them yourself to start a conversation.
Below, I’ll explain how to do both these things very successfully. So that you know both how to get women to notice you and also what to do about it later.
That’s because getting them to notice you is just the first step. You must actually do something about it or it won’t make any difference at all and you’ll get no dates out of it.
Oh, and I’ll also cover stuff like wardrobe, attitude, looks and similar things. Because they also have a small role to play in how women see and perceive you.
Yes, I say small role because your body language is way more important than your looks or the clothes you wear when it comes to girls noticing you.
How to get attention from girls using body language
So the key of how to get a hot girl to notice you is to have attractive body language. Which is really wonderful news, to be honest! Because pretty much anyone can develop body language which is powerful, confident and attractive to women.
So here’s the first step to developing this attractive body language:
FIX YOUR POSTURE
This one’s really important. Because girls won’t really acknowledge you if you look like a goblin and slouch all the time. Or if you have really weird and bendy posture that’s just unattractive to look at.
So here’s a great secret to fixing your posture: Stand with your back against a wall so your bum, shoulders and head touch it. Then, raise both your arms in a circular motion until they meet at the top. Hold that pose and step away from the wall. While holding that posture, lower your arms — and that’s it! You’ll now have your perfect posture ready to go.
This simple yet really helpful technique is something I’ve learned from a professional dancer. Practice doing it whenever you notice you start slouching and eventually you’ll have great posture.
Relax and let loose
The next step to having confident and powerful body language is to make sure you’re always relaxed and not rigid. That’s because if you move like a robot, being all tense and strung-up, you’ll seem really weird and women will not give you attention.
Here’s how you can practice having relaxed and fluid body language: Take a really deep breath and exhale fully. Move your shoulders and arms around like you’re doing a warming-up exercise. Do a couple of small jumps, shake your hands and loosen up. The key to this exercise is movement. You can even turn on some music to help you get in the groove.
In fact, dancers always have amazing body language, so take that up if you have a chance. Or make it a point to turn on some amazing music you like every once in a while. And then, while you’re alone in your room, just close your eyes and move to its rhythm.
This may sound like really corny and silly advice, but trust me, it really works and will help you develop very attractive and relaxed body language. Plus, virtually all women love a man who can dance, so that’s a huge bonus as well which will definitely come in handy eventually. So being a decent dancer is one of the best ways of how to get attention from girls in general.
Take up as much space as you need
The next step in how to get girls to notice you because of your powerful body language is to take up more space.
You see, confident people are comfortable with themselves and with taking as much space as they need to feel that comfort. So don’t be afraid to take as much room as you need when you’re going about your business.
For example, when you’re sitting down, don’t slouch or sit in a huddled way. Because a lot of men don’t like to stand out and it almost looks like they shrink away, taking up as little space as possible.
Instead, take up as much space as you need to feel comfortable. Don’t be afraid to lean back, spread your legs and put your arms wide.
Imagine how you’d sit on your favorite sofa at home . . . You wouldn’t stay huddled in one corner, sinking into yourself. You’d make yourself comfortable since it’s the right thing to do.
Additionally, take up as much space as you need when doing pretty much anything else. When standing around, walking, talking and so on. Your comfort should be the most important thing on your mind and you shouldn’t sacrifice it for anyone . . . unless they ask really nicely! Girls really notice this in men and like it a lot. This is also a reason why girls like bad boys so much and find them attractive.
Confident men are comfortable with themselves and have no trouble owning the space around them.
So stand tall, plant yourself with your feet wide apart and embrace the space around you.
Just don’t become overly aggressive and wild with your movements and gestures. Don’t flail around wildly with your hands as that’s not really owning your space but being insecure and beliggerant.
Move slowly and purposefuly
The next step in getting girls to notice you using body language is to learn to move in certain ways.
You see, even though a confident man who has attractive body language is relaxed and loose, he still moves in a calm, collected and purposeful manner. With slow, steady and almost deliberate movements.
That’s because confident men don’t hesitate with their movements and don’t feel the need to hurry making a move. This is particularly and especially important when you’re eventually touching women and showing them your physicality.
So remember the following:
MOVE CALMLY AND WITH PURPOSE
This point is particularly important when learning how to get a girl to notice you so she’ll give you attention.
That’s because if girls spot you and recognize you, they’ll notice how you move. And if they see that you often hesitate to do something or move in a twitchy way with jerky movements, they won’t find you attractive. That’s why relaxing, slowing down and moving calmly and deliberately is the way to go.
Be expressive with your gestures and face
Another hugely impactful and important thing you can do to get girls to notice you is to be expressive. With your gestures, the tone of your voice, face, movements, etc.
When you’re telling stories and jokes and are talking to people, use your hands and various facial expressions to make what you’re saying much more impactful.
Hand gestures and facial expressions (not to mention your tone of voice) are huge and integral parts of CHARISMA. Something that makes men irresistible to women and makes girls want to chase you.
You see, people who talk with their hands are often viewed as more warm, agreeable and energetic. While those who are stiff, meek and less animated are seen as logical, cold and analytical.
And you definitely want girls to view you as warm and agreeable, instead of cold, if you want them to notice you more.
This is perfect for understanding how to get attention from girls, especially those you like. Because when you become more expressive while talking to people, they’ll simply start liking and enjoying your company more. So don’t be surprised when girls start giving you hints that they like you.
Take care of your looks and wardrobe
Next, take care of your looks and your wardrobe. This isn’t a huge point of how to get women to notice you, to be honest. Because powerful and expressive body language will trump pretty much any expensive clothes you can wear.
This is why we all know the saying that “Clothes don’t make the man!”
However, your clothes and appearance still play a role, so they do matter to some extent.
The best thing you can do to take care of these two things (your looks and your wardrobe) is to hit the gym to become fit and wear stylish, comfortable clothes.
That’s pretty much all I have to say on the subject. Because as long as you have a decent sense of style, you don’t need to wear expensive designer clothes to impress women.
And if you’re smart enough to exercise reguarly so you don’t become a fat and lazy slob, you’ll instantly become much more attractive to women.
That’s because your actual looks don’t matter. As long as you’re decently fit, have good hygiene and take care of your grooming. This will solve all the problems related to looks any man can have. And that’s all it takes to get girls to notice you when it comes to appearance.
Be sociable with everyone
Being sociable with people around you is incredibly important for figuring out how to get girls to notice you more. Especially if you’re at school, parties, clubs, bars and pretty much anywhere where there’s tons of people.
That’s because if you sit in the corner all the time and don’t talk to anyone, women will quickly notice this and think you’re a loser. They’ll think you have terrible social skills or anxiety and won’t find you attractive at all.
Incidentally, if you do have terrible social anxiety, then make sure to do the following:
SIGN UP FOR MY NEWSLETTER
When you sign up for my newsletter, you’ll reiceive an in-depth inner game course which will help you get rid of nervousness, shyness and anxiety around women. It’s really worth the read if you struggle with these insecurities.
Anyway, when you’re around women and you want them to notice you, be social with everyone in the room. Girls will quickly take note of this and think you’re a fun, interesting and great guy. You’ll get their attention and they’ll want to hang out with you much more.
Also, look friendly and approachable if you want them to eventually come up and talk to you. Don’t close yourself off with defensive body language such as crossing your arms or frowning too much.
So make it a point to have fun with the people around you. It’s one of the surest ways of how to get girls to notice you and then even approach you because they like you.
Which brings me to my next point:
Hold strong eye contact with girls who notice you
Once girls actually start noticing you, they’ll want to know who you are. They’ll start looking in your general direction and then your eyes might lock.
When this happens and you lock eyes with a girl who’s noticed you, don’t break eye contact. Instead, hold it and let her be the one to look away.
That’s because if you break eye contact first or if you look away in a shy matter or down at your feet, it’ll show her you’re not confident at all. She’ll notice you’re meek and timid or shy and awkward and she won’t want to talk to you.
Instead, hold her gaze and don’t look away.
If she holds it as well and more than a few moments pass, you’ll want to do something to make it look like you’re not just awkwardly staring at her.
You can smile warmly at her or make a sly grin as if you know something she doesn’t or even nod at her to acknowledge her. This will intrigue her and make her notice you. Which will make her want to approach you and see who you are. Or at least start wondering something like “Who’s this fun guy?”
This is how to get a girl to notice you like her when she’s already interested in finding out who you are.
If she doesn’t approach you herself, you can approach her instead. Remember, walk in a relaxed, calm, and purposeful manner. Don’t hesitate and approach with confidence. Then introduce yourself, tell her you’ve noticed something about her and you wanted to find out who she was. If you do all this correctly, she’ll want to talk to you to see who you are as well.
Once girls start noticing you because you show powerful and attractive body language, they’ll want to talk to you.
And once you talk to them, you’ll eventually start getting their numbers. After that, you should call them or text them to set up a date.
But do you actually know what to do on that date so she likes you and thinks your amazing and then wants to sleep with you?
You see, too many guys get numbers and go on dates . . . But because they don’t really know what to do, they screw things up and the girls don’t give them anymore chances.
So it’s very important you know how to attract women on your dates and later seduce them. By having tons of fun, connecting with them on a deeper level . . . Then flirting with them and teasing them to spark emotions and create tons of attraction. And then building chemistry and sexual tension so they become aroused and horny and want to sleep with you themselves.
I’m here to show you some of the absolute biggest reasons why nice guys finish last when it comes to women and the meaning and significance of it in dating. As well as point out the most awful nice guy mistakes they make that completely obliterate any chances with women they’d otherwise have.
Learning this topic is crucial if you want to be successful with women and stand any chance of attracting them. Because if you make even one of these awful, attraction-killing mistakes. You’ll often ruin your chances with the girl you like so completely that she’ll resent you and want nothing to do with you.
Also, make sure to read why women like bad boys vs nice guys before or after this article if you want to know the underlying reason behind everything I’m going to talk about below. It’ll also explain the difference between nice guys and players.
The Biggest Mistakes Nice Guys Make And Why They Finish Last
These nice guy mistakes are here to show you the main things you need to avoid in order to be more successful with women. They’ll provide you with some insights why nice guys always lose out on many relationship opportunities.
These mistakes are also the underlying reason behind why nice guys finish last very often and then cry about it to high heavens.
1) Nice guys are boring and talk to girls on dates like they are interviewing them!
“What did you study?”, “Where did you work?”, “What do you think of the weather?”
Women have heard this question a million times from every guy they went on a date with and that’s so EXCRUCIATINGLY BORING.
Millions of guys go on dates and ONLY ask questions like “Oh hey, so where are you from originally?”, “So what is your job?“, “What college you go to?“, “Where did you live before?“, “Do you like to vacation?“, “Are you from this town originally, or did you move here?“, or even about the fucking WEATHER!
And then they act surprised why the girl doesn’t have any feelings for them.
How can she have any feelings for someone who bores them half to death?
If all you do on a date is talk about stuff like this, then don’t be surprised when girls don’t see you as anything more than a non-sexual friend. Who likes to talk about the weather and work and shit.
Instead, talk about your passions and about the things that actually make you feel something. Talk about life, your mutual hobbies, interests, wants, desires, hopes, dreams, etc. Talk about something weird, silly, sexual, ridiculous, and so on and so forth. And talk about what’s on your mind, instead of trying to think up topics you think she would like.
Stop talking about bullshit no one cares about just to carry on the conversation. Even silence is more compelling, when done right and with proper eye contact, than talking about work, weather, shopping, and similar things.
So one of the reasons why nice guys are boring is because their conversations often ressemble passionless and monotonic interviews.
2) Nice guys come on too strong and share “How they Feel” too early!
Guess what? Attractive women are getting approached by men all the time!
When beautiful women go about their day, when they take their commute to work, go shopping, meet and hang out with their friends, etc. They easily get approached by 10 or 20 different random guys per day! That’s THOUSANDS of men per year.
It gets tedious, repetitive, and predictable.
Nowadays it’s even more pronounced because many women are on dating sites and dating apps, like Tinder. There, they get messages from HUNDREDS of random guys per day who desperately want to fuck them. They get showered with compliments, affection, and validation all day, and are constantly bombarded by messages from men who express their love.
As a result, most women end up developing certain filters to weed out boring, predictable, and uninteresting men. Especially those who come on too strong too early, without any compelling or real reason.
Knowing this, you must understand that there’s no faster way to get an attractive woman to run away from you than by telling her stuff like “I really LOVE you!” or “You’re the best girl in the world!” on your first date, second, or even third date.
SAVE THAT SHIT FOR LATER BECAUSE IT SHOWS YOU ARE DESPERATE!
The dangers of “confessing your love too early”
One of the reasons women enjoy the company of bad boys is that they don’t gush about their feelings right off the bat!
Conversely, a big reason why women hate nice guys is that they lay it on too thick almost instantly. As soon as they get even the slightest bit of positive attention from women.
So get this, once women know they can have you right at the beginning and that you’ll do everything for them — the magic is gone! There can be no more spark and they’ll lose respect and attraction towards you. That’s one instance where you have to hold back on “sharing your emotions”.
As much as people hate to admit it, there has to be a certain “game”, or “dating ritual” in the beginning, for natural attraction and seduction to happen. You can’t just go spouting you love people after meeting them for a little bit. Because it makes no sense!
It’s just so damn creepy that nice guys decide to “love” someone after meeting them for a day, a week or even a month. True love takes a lot of time to develop! So women know that your love is bullshit if you express it too soon.
That’s why most women who are secure and have their shit together will think: “Why would he fall in love with me so early and easily, when he doesn’t even know me all that well as a person? He must be desperate, or just wants to fuck me for my looks!“. And POOF – she instantly loses all attraction and respect for you. And this is exactly why a lot of nice guys finish last with girls they meet.
Believe it or not, if you confess to women how much you love them right when you meet them, they’ll just look at you as if you’re crazy, and leave.
Two reasons for why nice guys fail
Saying you love someone too early, before you actually figure them out is bad because of the following:
First – Why would you LOVE someone who you don’t even know on a very deep and personal level?
Seriously, you know next to NOTHING about her and you just like the way she looks. But what if she’s a horrible person underneath those looks? What if she’s just a vile, angry, jealous, whiny, dumb human being? What if she’s some psycho mental patient who’s destructive and will ruin both your lives? That’s a bit of an extreme example, but it gets the point across.
People understand that it’s impossible to love someone without even knowing who they are as a person first. Maybe they won’t even be sexually, intellectually, or even emotionally compatible with you? Compatibility is one of the most important components in a healthy and strong relationship.
Second – If you “confess your feelings” right away, women will realize that they have you in their pocket and that you’ll do anything for them. They’ll lose all interest in you because you’ve given all your power away in an instant!
There’s no more mystery, no more excitement, no more flirting and no more sexual tension because you’ve ruined it all.
This has to do with the whole Masculine vs Feminine dynamic thing and seduction needing tension to be effective. Which is why nice guys can’t get laid no matter how much they try.
Because women adore masculine, manly men.
3) Nice boys do everything to please women and seek their approval
Another one of nice guy mistakes is that lots of guys try to please women as much as possible and mistakenly think this will make them like you.
Are you guilty of doing that, too?
Here’s the truth — women will NEVER be attracted to someone who tries to kiss up to them.
If all you do is kiss ass, look for their approval, seek permission for everything you do, without seemingly having a will of your own. Then women will never be attracted to you because they won’t respect you. Trust me, an attention-seeking behavior around women is really, really bad.
In fact, women will get ANNOYED by you!
Don’t believe me? Just ask any beautiful women if she feels annoyed by pussy guys who always chase her around, kiss ass, and do everything in their power to please her, hoping to get some of her affection . . .
This may sound counter-intuitive to you, but it’s exactly why a lot of nice guys fail with women and why girls prefer bad boys.
You should not be filtering your true thoughts and beliefs in an attempt to impress a woman or tell her what you think she wants to hear.
You also shouldn’t be such a tryhard to win her love an approval because it’ll never work.
It’s not the things you own, not the gifts you give and not the favors you do for women that makes them love you. It’s the way you make women FEEL around you that dictates how attractive they’ll find you. And being a kiss-ass who always tries to please them makes them feel like you’re her servant and definitely not a lover.
4) Niceguys try to CONVINCE women to like them!
First of all, you can’t ever convince a woman to become attracted to you with logic and reasoning. That’s not how attraction works!
Attraction is based on emotions. It’s not a choice that women make by consciously calculating all the things about you.
If the latter were true, only rich and successful men would have women around them. Yet there are tons of guys who have many women who aren’t considered even close to being successful.
So your money plays almost no role in how women find you attractive at a raw and animalistic level.
And that’s another reason why nice guys finish last and why girls prefer bad boys over them. Because bad boys never try to use logic to build attraction, only pure emotions.
I’m sure that there were times when you’ve met a girl that you REALLY like . . . But when she wasn’t all that much interested in you, you tried to convince with logic her to change her mind! Saying that you’re better than this or that guy because you have this or that or you’ve accomplished various things, etc.
That never works! Yet a lot of guys go chasing, begging, pleading, crying and asking the girl to change her mind and go out with them. All they tend to hear is “I’m busy” or “I just don’t see you in that way, let’s stay friends,” or a myriad of other usual excuses. “Sorry, I got to wash my cat’s hair today…”
Which is why you should avoid this massive nice guy mistake and stop using logic to convince girls to date you.
Instead, make a compelling emotional case as to why a woman should fall for you. Show her who you are, what makes you you.
5) “Nice fellows” never actually let the girl know they find her attractive and want her sexually
This is a HUGE sign of the “nice guy syndrome” and I’ve mentioned it briefly above! It’s also one of the most common reasons why most nice guys lose and get friend zoned!
They are simply too afraid to let the girl know that they want her sexually.
Seriously, how are you going to have sex with someone if you don’t even let them know you like them sexually?! LET THAT SINK IN!
Do they want silent ninja sex or something? Where they go in – whoosh whoosh whoosh – finish up, and fly away without her somehow finding out what just happened?
Do you realize how SILLY and ABSURD that sounds?
Here are the basics of human interaction to have sex: If you like the person and want to have sex with them, you let that person know you want to have sex with them in no uncertain terms. And then, if they feel the same way about you, you start having fun.
But “Really nice”, sexually non-threatening guys usually do something else:
They LIKE the girl, they want to go on a date with her, have a lot of fun together, sleep with her and eventually start a relationship together . . . Yet they are terrified of getting rejected so they always skirt around the issue of letting the girl know that they want her sexually. Some are even afraid of the girl knowing about their sexuality, or, what’s even worse, are ashamed of it!
Some even pretend to be friends and nothing else. Somehow thinking they’ll trick the girl into eventually sleeping with them, by hanging out with her, doing various things friends do, etc. And then by springing on them unexpectedly the fact they want and expect sex from her in return!
How fucked up is that? If you act like a friend, look like a friend and do nothing to signal you wanting to be anything more than a friend. Then don’t expect to be more than just friends!
Here’s why nice guys get friend zoned
Nice guys never clearly state their intentions and leave everything ambiguous! They don’t know when and how to initiate physicality properly. When to kiss her, when to touch her and hug her, etc. Because of that, they end up missing their chance and screwing up. Since they always look for “the perfect moment” to make a move yet never seem to find it.
If that’s you, then I urge you to read my seduction book to find out when and how you should be making your move.
Because once a girl notices that these nice guys always doubt themselves and hesitate when it comes to making a move and expressing their true intentions. Or that they’re “too shy” to let her know they want her sexually. She’ll label them as pussies and lose all respect and attraction! She’ll instantly know she does not want a guy like that to be her lover.
So a lot of “nice” guys end up surprised and cry something like “Oh, she rejected my advances!” When the they didn’t even let the girl know they want to fuck her.
This is what makes a lot of “nice guys” inherently dishonest and actually not so nice.
Seriously, it’s in our nature to be physically attracted to beautiful women and to want to have sex with them. Not hiding your sexuality is one of the most important reasons why girls go for bad boys!
It’s not a secret to women that you want to sleep with them if you’re approaching them and talking to them without any specific platonic or work-related purpose.
They know it, we know it — so grow up and don’t be afraid to ADMIT IT. Then accept it, and NEVER hide it!
Again, this is about femininity and masculinity. Sexual tension. Those kinds of important things.
This is another instance where bad boys have a huge advantage. Because they’re comfortable with their sexuality and don’t hide it!
6) Nice guys give her gifts, hoping to buy her affection in return
Many “nice men” think that if they bring flowers on a date, buy her drinks, give her expensive gifts and do other similar stuff when they don’t even know her – before she actually deserves all these things – that she’ll somehow start showing affection right away.
Guys, these are not the 1950’s anymore! Don’t be a nice guy by trying to give something expensive and expecting sex in return. This act is the same as men being incredibly shallow and only appreciating women for looks and nothing else, trying to buy their affection with shiny things.
Think of it from a woman’s perspective: She doesn’t know you all that much and you don’t know her either. When you meet her on the first date — you give her an expensive gift, flowers, or something similar. She thinks “Why would he do that? He doesn’t even know me?He must want or expect something in return! He must do this to all women!”
Once she starts thinking that – it’s all over.
Everything you do from then on will go through that filter of “you want something from her in return, and must be compensating for your character flaws with gifts or money.”
This is showing her you have low self-esteem. Like you think you’re somehow not “worthy” of her by yourself and must add incentives for her to likes you. Seriously, let THAT sink in for a bit.
It has the same effect as putting women on pedestals: Treating them like princesses, never disagreeing, arguing, expressing your own ideas, and basically being a total doormat. That’s very unattractive! Besides the obvious fact that it also dehumanizes women and shows you see them as objects you can buy.
So you see, women like men who are secure in themselves. Because they don’t have to compensate for their personality or lack of it, with gifts!
7) “Good guys” are afraid to displease and lose the girl
A lot of guys never argue, offend, tease, or disagree with the girl in any way.
They’re afraid of displeasing her and terrified of losing her. But this only shows her that they have many problems with their self-esteem. And also, this shows a ton of desperation and that you’re not very good with women.
Here’s the raw truth: If you are desperate, no girl is going to like you. That’s because desperation emanates from you as cheap perfume does, and girls smell it easily!
Desperation is probably the number one attraction-killer in the world. And as far as nice guy mistakes go, this is one of the worst you can make.
As soon as a girl gets even a whiff of the fact that you’re DESPERATE to sleep with her. Her legs will lock shut and you’ll never have a chance with her again. It instantly kills any shred of her respect and attraction for you.
And get this: If you’re too afraid of teasing the girl, “ruffling her feathers” so to speak, which is a form of flirting — you’ll never create any strong emotions and strong sexual attraction.
Being disrespectful to a woman is the clearest way of communicating that you are indifferent to her opinion of you. Women will find it very difficult to rationalize why a man who’s interested in them would be insulting them. An insult can sub-communicate to a woman that you’re not trying to impress her nor are you emotionally dependent on her..
It’s time you learn how to ask a woman to sleep with you successfully, provided she’s already attracted to you.
Because truth is, asking women to sleep with you and getting a positive response isn’t really that difficult if you know how to do it right. It simply involves doing the right thing at the right time and encouraging her to become more intimate with you.
That said, a lot of guys screw this crucial step up and end up with nothing. They either scare the girl off by being too pushy, break the all-important sexual tension or say something really stupid. Which turns women off and makes them not want to have sex with you at all.
So make sure to read every word below because I’ll tell you exactly how it’s done the right way. You don’t want to miss any subtelties!
Things to do before asking women to sleep with you
Before you make your move and ask the girl to sleep with you, several very important things have to happen first. Otherwise, you’ll never succeed!
She has to be attracted to you
She has to be comfortable with you and your touch
You have to have an emotional connection
There needs to be sexual tension between you
If even one of these crucial steps is missing, you’ll rarely get a positive response when you ask a woman to sleep with you.
That’s because women simply don’t want to sleep with men who they aren’t attracted to and who they don’t trust and aren’t comfortable with. They also usually don’t want sex with guys who they have no emotional connection to.
Especially if there’s no sexual spark between the two of you. Something that’s known as chemistry and sexual tension, which is important to turn a woman on and make her wet and want sex with you.
And why would they want to have sex with you without any of these things? Sleeping with someone is a very emotional experience and you really have to like and trust the person.
So make sure you’ve already handled all these crucial steps above if you want to get a positive answer when you ask a woman to sleep with you.
Oh, and if you don’t know how to attract women, then make sure to click the button below to solve this issue quickly and easily:
With that out of the way, let’s get to the nitty-gritty of how to actually ask women to sleep with you.
Here’s how to ask a woman to sleep with you the best way
Now, provided she’s already attracted to you and there’s enough sexual tension in the air, here’s how I ask a woman to sleep with me and succeed virtually every time.
I don’t actually ask her anything. Instead, I encourage more intimacy and then invite her to have sex with me. By leading the interaction towards sex in a manly, firm yet gentle way.
Sounds counter-intuitive, doesn’t it?
I mean, you can go and simply say something like “You’re so beautiful, do you want to have sex with me?” And you’ll definitely get a “Yes . . .” but only some of the time.
That’s because there are many, many things wrong with saying something like this in the form of a direct question. And it doesn’t matter how “beautifully” you word the question itself. Since the biggest problem with why you’ll often get a negative response is the fact itself that you’re actually ASKING her for sex.
Here’s why asking for sex won’t go as well as you think
The mere fact you ask a woman for sex in the form of a question is pretty bad. Because it overtly shows insecurity and neediness.
This instantly shifts the entire power dynamic of your interaction and makes you look like you’re unsure of yourself. Because you’ve given up the lead to her and now it’s up to her to move things forward. Which often won’t end in your favor.
This is because women want men to lead.
The vast majority of women want men who are dominant, assertive, decisive, etc. Men who know what they want and go for it. Men who can lead the interaction where it needs to go so women can get lost in the moment and in the experience.
Basically, sex should be a natural progression of your interaction with women. They should be able to later say “Oh, it just kind of happened!” when they later think on how things went. Instead of “Oh he asked me to have sex with him and I said yes,” which can easily look like they’re being slutty.
It’s all part of the masculinity and femininity dynamic. Feminine women respond powerfully to masculine men. And the ability to lead and move things forward is a hugely masculine trait. (I’ll be writing a full article about femininity and masculinity soon)
So don’t be surprised when you get a negative response when you ask a woman to sleep with you by presenting a question to her.
However, don’t get me wrong! This isn’t about forcing women to have sex with you because NO means NO! Instead, this is about not giving your power away and being the manly man women love.
How to encourage women to sleep with you instead of asking
Now, instead of learning how to ask a woman to sleep with you with a question, it’s better to learn how to do it in a way that’s infinitely better.
By leading your interaction towards sex, both physically and verbally, without asking any questions.
So how do you do this, exactly?
Well, there are many different ways to make your move and initiate sex without having to actually ask for it.
The ask itself is always implied by your actions and tonality and is non-verbal. So there’s always a chance for her to decline, in which case you must back off. Because it’ll obviously mean she’s not attracted enough to you to want to sleep with you yet.
Some examples of leading a woman to bed to have sex
Let’s say you’re both at your place or hers. What now?
Well, one option would be to escalate aggressively and directly. By getting close to her, pulling her in for a makeout session and then, while you’re in the middle of passionate french-kissing, simply lifting her up and physically taking her to bed.
This approach often works because the girl will be REALLY turned on and aroused if she’s lost in the moment of a huge makeout. So the next natural step is to take each other’s clothes off and have sex.
Another approach would be to take things slowly and steadily, by ramping up the sexual tension so she becomes aroused and wants you badly herself.
You could both get comfortable together on a couch, turn on some sweet tunes to enhance the atmosphere. Then talk to her in a sensual way, touch her intimately, gaze into her eyes with strong yet sexual eye contact, all to get her in the mood.
Eventually, you can get closer to her so your faces are right next to each other, put your arm around her, whisper something sexy into her ear, etc.
At this point, you can either just go for it by initiating a makeout. Or try saying some naughty things to get her to think about sex. If you think she’d enjoy the latter, then you can get increasingly naughty with what you’re saying, as long as it turns her on and increases her arousal.
Otherwise, what I do is say “Come, sit here . . .” and guide her physically so she sits on top of me. Then I put my arms around her and kiss her. While kissing her, I start taking off her clothes little by little. If she likes you enough, sex will follow.
As long as there’s enough sexual tension, she’ll sleep with you without asking
You see, the whole thing of how to ask a woman to sleep with you without actually asking her for it is to ramp up the sexual tension as much as possible.
Then no matter what, she’ll want to sleep with you herself because she’ll be really aroused and horny.
This involves lots of powerful eye contact, intimate touching and talking about sexual topics. It does NOT involve you asking for sex directly because it breaks the whole mood.
Also, it doesn’t even matter where you are, if there’s enough sexual tension, she’ll be ready to jump on you and sleep with you even if you’re at a bar, club, restaurant, park, beach, wherever.
I’ve had so many dates where the sexual tension was so palpable that we ended up hooking up in the bathroom of the venue. Just because she got so horny she was down for anything, without me even asking to sleep with her at all.
I just noticed that she was down for it in the way she was looking at me and how she was touching me. She had those “puppy dog” eyes, which pretty much said “Take me and fuck me now!” And I took her by the hand and lead her to the bathroom. That’s it.
So, if you want to get laid a lot and sleep with women without even asking them for sex, make sure you have a great time with them so they like you and then RAMP UP THE SEXUAL TENSION LIKE CRAZY!
And then lead, lead and lead! Don’t wait for HER to do everything for you. Lead her to your place, lead her to kiss you, lead her to your bed to have sex. It’s YOUR responsibility to get what you want as a man.
Here’s how to build sexual tension to sleep with women
As I said before, eye contact, physicality and talking about sexual and spicy topics is the key to how to ask a woman to have sex with you without actually asking.
When you’re already into each other, gaze longlingly into her eyes. Look at her lips, lick yours as if you really want to kiss her, and smile knowingly. She’ll usually smile herself.
Intense eye contact is a very powerful thing and it’s proven to increase sexual desire with other people who you’re already interested in. So don’t make the huge mistake of underestimating its use when you’re with a woman you like and want to have sex with.
When it comes to physicality, it’s massively important to make women comfortable with you, to build attraction and eventually have sex.
So when you’re learning how to ask a woman to sleep with you without actually asking, make sure to be physical with her right from the start of your interaction.
That’s because if you refrain from touching her the whole time you’re with her and then suddenly make your move and try to kiss her and initiate sex, she’ll often freak out. Because it’ll seem completely random and very incongruent with how you’ve been acting up until that point.
For her not to freak out with your suddenly touching her and initiating sex, you need to make sure to establish you’re a physical guy early on. By touching her throughout your meeting right from the start.
Here’s how to be physical right from the start
Hug her or shake her hand warmly when you greet her. Touch her on the shoulder or her arm when you’re making important points. High-five her when she says something cool or funny. Put your hand on her lower back when you’re entering the venue, and so on and so forth.
While you’re teasing her, flirting with her and joking around, nudge her, put your arms around her and shake her a bit, just like you’d do with your little sister.
When you’re leaving the venue, take her by the hand. When you’re crossing the street, extend your hand and hold her so she feels safe.
If you’re meeting in a bar or club, dancing is one of the best ways to get physically comfortable with one another.
Doing some fun and physical activity while on your date, like playing pool is also perfect. Because you can touch her throughout the whole thing when you’re engaging in banter, joking around and maybe even teaching her some moves.
Doing all this is hugely important because she’ll gradually become comfortable with you. And your eventual intimate touching will just seem like a natural progression of your interaction.
Sexual talk and naughty topics
Finally, another way to increase sexual tension right before you ask her to sleep with you is by talking about sex.
Just don’t make it super obvious that you’re doing this because your goal is to make her horny or something. Because it’ll seem disingenuous and like you have an ulterior motive.
Instead, talk about sex and various sexual things like it’s no big deal at all. You have to establish you’re a non-judgmental guy when it comes to sex. Like it’s the most normal, natural and pleasant thing in the world.
So don’t be afraid to talk about sex and various naughty things with women. To show you’re not ashamed or anxious about your sexuality. And that you won’t judge women who have a “dirty mind.”
Ask them various things like where was the craziest place they had sex. Tell them various stories from your or your friend’s life which involve some sexy things. Or even interesting stories from the wold which involve something sexual. Like the famous story of a male hamster who got into the female enclosure and impregnated all 100 of them.
The point is to encourage women around you to start thinking about sex. And since you’ll be the only guy around, they’ll eventually start associating those thoughts with you. They’ll get aroused and maybe horny, which will increase sexual tension and will want them to sleep with you. And that’s exactly how you ask a woman to sleep with you without even asking her but instead ENCOURAGING her to do so with your actions and words.
Final thoughts on asking a girl to sleep with you
I’m serious about this, if you focus on learning how to ask a girl to sleep with you, you’ll often fail. Because you’re going to be looking at the whole thing from the wrong angle.
Sure, like I said before, you’ll sometimes get a yes. But why would you want to risk it and often get a no as well?
Instead, focus on having fun with women, on getting to know them, flirting to build attraction and then RAMPING UP THE SEXUAL TENSION. Then women will want to sleep with you themselves without you having to ask for sex at all.
Don’t do what most unsuccessful guys do and listen to what the most successful seducers in the world do to sleep with a lot of women. Guys who are successful don’t focus on silly things like how to ask a girl to have sex with them. They know what works and lead women to hook up with them.
If you have any further questions, then you’re always welcome to ask. Because I’m just scratching the surface here.
Seduction may seem very counterintuitive if you’re new at this. But that’s because it’s not logical and mostly emotion-based. Which is why it’s important to know what turns a woman on sexually and then do that instead.
Finally, if you want to learn the ultimate new way of how to get laid on your first date virtually every time, then GET THE FULL COURSE.
Today I’ll show you exactly how to attract a girl for love if your goal is to have a serious and long-term relationship with her. And the answer to this might really surprise you.
Below, I’ll explain everything that needs to happen for girls to fall in love with you in a short time. Then show the three critical steps necessary for doing so. And also mention the things you need to do to ensure the relationship lasts and doesn’t crumble after the initial “honeymoon” period.
Learning how to attract a girl to love you so she actually stays with you is one of the most important things a man must do. Otherwise, you’ll have trouble with keeping women around and they’ll leave you when they realize the relationship isn’t going anywhere.
Here’s how to attract a girl for love successfully
There are three crucial steps to follow when your goal is to attract women for love successfully. And then keep them around for a long time in a wonderful and mutually beneficial relationship.
Meet and seduce her
Connect on a deep level and see if you’re compatible
Show her you’re manly and have potential
I’ll go over all three steps in great detail below so you know how to do each of them and understand why they’re massively important for your success.
Step one – Meeting and seducing her
This step is usually the most difficult for beginners. Because not many guys know how to approach, talk to, have fun with, attract and then seduce girls successfully.
However, this is something every single guy needs to learn how to do properly. Because to find the right woman for you, you have to date a lot of women to get some life experience and figure out which ones are right for you and which aren’t. Until you eventually figure out your preferences and what you’re really after and then pick one who’s compatible with you and who’s right for you.
That’s because one of the biggest mistakes in life a man can make while figuring out how to attract a girl for love is to settle down with a woman who’s not right for him. Entirely out of desperation and because he thinks he won’t be able to find someone better. Usually, it’s the guys who struggle with women the most and don’t get laid much who end up in bad relationships.
Luckily, I know exactly what to do about this and I’ll tell you right now how you can seduce nearly every girl you meet successfully. Which is the first and essential part of how to attract a girl to love you eventually.
First, fix all external and internal issues plaguing you.
If you’re not attractive enough, get off that lazy ass and hit the gym or do other forms of exercise. It’s the absolute best thing any man can do to drastically improve his appearance as well as health. Which is always massively attractive to women.
Then, take care of your grooming, get a decent haircut, some nice-fitting clothes and a pleasant cologne.
That’s more than enough to take care of looks and appearance for most guys so women won’t find them repulsive.
You don’t need to look hot, you just need to look like you take care of yourself.
After that, fix any problems you may have with bad body language, your tone of voice, eye contact, as well as issues such as nervousness, fear, hesitation, bad attitude, etc.
Obviously, that’s easier said than done but you must do it. Because if you’re a shaky, wimpy, nervous mess when you approach women and can’t even talk to them without your voice breaking, you won’t be able to seduce them successfully.
So before you even go about learning how to attract a girl to love you forever, it’s crucial to take care of these and similar issues.
Because the hard-to-swallow truth is, half of the seduction process lies within YOU.
You have to first get yourself in order before you even approach the girl. Then half your battle will be won before you even talk to an attractive girl and try to seduce her to love you.
Bottom line is: No woman in her right mind will want to be with a fat, lazy and unmotivated slob who doesn’t take care of himself at all. Remember this crucial point when learning how to attract a girl for love.
Second, approach her, have fun with her and get her number
This step is pretty simple and straightforward, but definitely not easy.
You simply go where lots of attractive women are, like a bar, club, party or even a busy street , beach, park or shopping mall.
Then, find someone you find attractive, approach her, introduce yourself and talk to her like she’s a regular human being. To find out who she is, see if you like her, maybe see if she likes you, etc. And then flirt a little bit, tease her very lightly and maybe even have some laughs together, so you get her number to hang out together again at another time and move things forward.
Once you read that article and practive what’s in it and you’re able to approach and get her number, you can get back to learning how to attract girls for love.
Third, have a successful first date and seduce her
This is by far the most important part of the equation and the place where you actually go about attracting a girl for love. The keeping her in the relationship part comes later.
Basically, after you get her number and ask her out, you meet her for the date. On that date, your ultimate goal is to have fun with her and to get to know each other. Because to seduce her, she has to see you’re a great guy.
Then, you need to flirt with her, tease her even more and challenge her. All while maintaining strong eye contact with her, touching her and showing your physicality, telling her various interesting, fun or exciting stories from life experience, etc. So she starts feeling a gut-level attraction towards you.
Hopefully, you know how to do this the right way because this is the part where the majority of men screw up and fail. Never to hear from the girl again and ending up at square one.
Because not many guys know how to flirt, tease and challenge women properly so they like you, find you attractive, want your validation and crave your touch. If you’re also not sure how to do all that very successfully, look for an answer to this very shortly, just below.
In any case, after she’s attracted to you, you need to build some rapport and a deeper connection with her. So she feels comfortable with you and trusts you.
Finally, you need to create and maintain sexual tension to make her wet. So she feels aroused and horny and wants to sleep with you. Which you do by gradually making you touch more and more intimate, as well as moving your conversations unto increasingly sexual topics and making her think about sex in general and with you.
If you do that successfully, either on the first, second or whatever date, you then take her somewhere private and sleep together.
Did you get all that? Again, I make it sound so easy, but it’s actually the most difficult part of the whole process. So to make things significantly easier for you and show you how to always have amazing dates which pretty much always end up in sex, I urge you to go and check the following message in the link below:
With the knowledge from the message just above, you’ll nail the hardest step of the whole seduction process every time and will have no problems getting a girlfriend.
Then, when you’re able to seduce as many women as you want, you can finally focus on using the knowledge of how to attract a girl for love from the following two steps.
Step Two – Connecting on a deep level and checking for compatibility
Now that you’ve got a girlfriend, a few friends with benefits or something similar who you’d want to pursue a more serious relationship with, you need to take care of this next critical step.
This part of how to attract a girl for love is about figuring out if you both can actually have a healthy and happy long-term relationship with each other that’s also beneficial for the both of you. Of if you’re completely wrong for one another and shouldn’t pursue things further because it’ll end in disaster.
This involves having a heart-to-heart, serious, brutally honest and genuinely vulnerable talk with one another. To figure out what makes you both tick, what you want from each other, from life in general and from your potential relationship.
Yeah, it’s exactly as scary as it sounds. But it’s absolutely necessary if you actually want to live together, maybe have kids, build a home and a family, and grow old together.
Figure out what you both want
Every person is their own individual — and your potential partner is no exception.
She’ll have her own unique worldview as well as personal wants, needs, values, desires, goals, aspirations, ambitions, plans, ideas, opinions, etc.
She’s just as complex and unique a person as you are, and you need to respect your differences and find common ground if you both want to stay together.
So, you need to ask her very personal questions and she needs to do the same to you as well. Questions which are sometimes very difficult to answer truthfully. But they’re entirely necessary when trying to figure out how to attract a girl to love you in a long-term relationship.
You don’t need to have this super serious talk right away, especially when you’re just starting out dating. Because it’ll be too soon and you’ll only scare her off.
Hoever, this conversation needs to happen eventually and sooner rather than later. Because the longer you drag things on, the messier and harder on the both of you the potential breakup will be. Since time spent together strengthens attachment and emotional connection.
But break up you must, if you realize you’re both not compatible and don’t have a future together. Because the worst thing you two can do is have kids and build a home before you realize you can’t have a happy future due to irreconcilable differences. So many homes have been ruined by this that it’s not even funny.
The important questions to ask her
Hopefully I didn’t scare you off with the above. But trust me, it’s better to figure these things out early on than much later when .
In any case, what are the questions you should be asking her to see if she’s compatible with you?
Well, I can’t tell you that because you have to figure it out for yourself.
Ask her about the things that are genuinely important to you as a person to find out about her. Ask her what you actually CARE about knowing.
These can be just about anything, really. Whatever pops into your mind that’s important to you.
I’m guessing you’d maybe want to figure out her stance on various things in life that will affect your mutual relationship. Like work, play, health, food, politics, religion, children, education, travel, goals, aspirations, and other things.
Then see if your worldviews align or not. And if they don’t, what you can both do to compromise. See what she wants out of life and out of you as a partner. Figure out what her views on your hobbies, your friends and family are.
Don’t skimp on your questions and ask her anything and everything you deem important to you. And then urge her to do the same and ask you about what’s important to her.
Remember, a happy, healthy and mutually beneficial relationship is a two-way street. Where two independent individuals come together in mutual trust, respect, understanding, attraction, and love. And then try to make things better for both of them.
Only if you figure out if you’re both compatible with one another will you make your relationship succeed. This is the main point of how to attract a girl for affection and devotion, and avoid lots of drama and an eventual breakup in the future.
The next part is even more important because it has to do with keeping a girl’s love going strong for you until the end.
Step Three – Show her you’re manly and have future potential
Out of everything else, this is the part that ensures her love endures for you and doesn’t fade.
Showing her you’re a manly man and that you have the potential for greatness is the most important part of understanding how to attract a girl for love if you actually want to be with her until the end.
So how do you do that?
Well, I’ll explain what manliness is in a separate article. Because it’s a massive topic in and of itself and will require a huge and separate write-up.
That said, I’ll still give you a big clue as to what it is below so you know what I’m talking about.
Basically, manliness is the ability to use all your faculties, experiences, masculine traits and other qualities to make things happen in life.
This includes things like assertiveness, ambition, dominance, passion, integrity, authenticity, independence, physical, mental and emotional strength, responsibility, decisiveness, leadership, confidence, and so on and so forth.
There are very many qualities that make a man manly and the more he possesses and embodies, the more attractive to all women he will be.
Basically, women desire men who are manly and will stay with a man who maintains his manliness. Because it shows women he has enormous potential to achieve all his goals and ambitions.
That’s why after learning how to attract a girl to love you, only through manliness can you actually keep her. Because she won’t want to leave for someone else that way.
Final Thoughts on girls and love
Now you know the exact three steps of how to attract a girl for love and then encourage her stay with you until the very end.
The first part may seem to be the most impossible one, but it’s seriously not that difficult to learn how to seduce women efficiently.
The second part is very necessary because you want to make sure you’re both compatible.
It’s the third step that’s actually the hardest. Because developing your manliness and maintaining it is a life-long process. Not something you do once and forget about, but something keep doing until the day you die.
And the best time to start is always right now. Peace!
Today I’ll show you exactly how to attract a married woman to love you and care for you deeply. As well as how to flirt with her successfully so she wants to be with you.
Some people won’t like this topic because they feel it’s dishonest to make a marriage fail in order to steal away a woman.
That said, there are many women right now who are in loveless and failed marriages. So I wouldn’t want to give sleeping with married woman advice very lightly.
That’s why this article on attracting married women is SOLELY and SPECIFICALLY for the purpose of making women who are already in terrible marriages happier. By showing them it’s okay to leave their husbands who treat them terribly and to start a new, better and happier relationship with someone else. In this case, hopefully, you.
How to attract a married woman successfully and help her out
Hitting on married women to attract them should be done carefully, and never in a very blatant way. Because you never know who might be watching.
Even if she really likes you, she won’t show it to you if her friends or acquaintances are near her. Because word might travel and her husband or children may find out. Which will cause a total disaster in her already tumultuous relationship.
That’s why if you want to attract married women, you should always do it discreetly and with a bit of tact. Which means if you want to start hitting on married women, you should only do it when you’re both somewhere private, away from people who they may know. Never start hitting on them when they’re around others. Especially if it’s a work or a school setting.
Flirting with married women isn’t much different from flirting with just about any other woman.
The main difference is that you have to be more discreet in the beginning. So using your eye contact, body language and facial expressions correctly is significantly more important than flirting verbally.
That’s because you first want to screen her if she’s actually interested in other men. Or if she does not want to even entertain the idea of dating another man while she’s married.
That’s because for the man, the repercussions will be minor if things progress further. And for her, her whole life may drastically change if she decides to divorce her husband and leave him for someone else. That’s why married women will put much more thought into flirting and involving themselves with other men than single ones. Since they have to be sure it’s worth it in the end.
How to flirt with married woman successfully
Please keep the above in mind when learning how to flirt with a married woman because it’s important to your eventual success.
So, when you see a woman you like and you know she’s married, lock eyes with her and keep strong eye contact. Smile warmly or in a sly and cheeky manner, as if you know something she doesn’t, use your facial expressions to convey what you want and nod your head at her or otherwise acknowledge her.
Then wait for her reaction and see what she does. If she smiles, nods back at you, waves, beckons you over or does something similar that’s positive and inviting, then you’re free to walk up to her and chat her up. You should do so as well even if she just looks away in a shy manner but still smiles because that’s a clear sign of submission to your charm.
But if there’s any negative reaction like frowning, scowling or quickly looking away from you. Or even if there’s a completely neutral, lifeless reaction without any expression whatsoever, as if she doesn’t give a damn about you, then you shouldn’t approach her. This means she’s either completely not interested in you or doesn’t want to meet anyone right now. Or she’s actually in a great marriage and isn’t interested in other men at all, which you should always respect.
Now that you’ve gotten her attention and approached her, it’s time to figure out if you can proceed further and if she’s open to being with someone else. Because just flirting with her is a small part of how to attract a married woman. There’s something much more important to your success which I’ll talk about below.
Figuring things out
To do that,
you need to look around and become aware of any other people who are around
someone there, then you need to be straight with her and not play games for a
little while. This is to give her an out and a possibility to reject you
politely, so she may “save face” if she’s around someone who might tell her
husband or gossip about her.
You can do so
by saying “Hey, I think you’re very attractive and I’d like to get to know you.
Is it okay if we talk?”
This may sound counterintuitive, but it’s the absolute best way to ensure she won’t get into any trouble.
See what she replies and then proceed accordingly. If it’s a positive reply, you can begin flirting with her as you would with any other woman. Because the fact she’s a married woman stops being significant anymore.
If, however, she’s alone and there’s no chance of anyone overhearing your conversation, you don’t need to ask her this and you can instead proceed to get right to chit chat and then flirting.
Flirting with married women isn’t difficult
Once you get past the small talk, you should then proceed flirting with her. Just like you’d flirt with any other women.
In fact, flirting with a married woman is often much easier, especially if she’s in a sexless or loveless marriage. Because she’ll often want what she doesn’t already have and will be more open to your advances.
This will involve becoming more playful and physical with her as well as using stuff like teasing, pushing and pulling, roleplaying, being open and direct about what you want. As well as eventually creating some sexual tension.
Also, for your flirting to go much better than usual, involve a lot of physical touch and strong eye contact.
Eye contact in itself is massively important because it’s proven to create feelings of closeness and intimacy in people. That’s why you should always be expressive with your eyes when flirting with married women or any other woman for that matter.
Additionally, there’s almost nothing that builds as much attraction as quickly as physically touching women at appropriate moments. Because without physical touch, there can never be real and raw sexual attraction.
So don’t hesitate to touch her when you have the chance so you understand how to flirt with a married woman. Just don’t make it very obvious like you’re doing so robotically just to touch her. Do it more discreetly, by tapping her on the shoulder when you make a point. By high-fiving her or giving a similar reaffirming physical gesture when she says something awesome, funny or to your liking.
Don’t be afraid to nudge her, push her away playfully and touch her in similar ways when she says something weird, dumb, silly or uncool.
Point is, touch her as much as possible and have perfect your eye contact game.
Taking things further
Finally, when learning how to attract a married woman so she
falls in love with you and wants you sexually, you should make it a point to
show you can offer her more than her current relationship can.
It may be companionship, attention, time, sex, love, care, or even something as simple yet important as stimulating conversations. It’s important to figure these things out and use them to seal the deal.
So when you’re flirting with a married woman after you’ve taken her on a date, make sure to figure out what her current problems with her husband are. And then see if you can convey you can give her exactly what she craves from a man.
However, you should only do this when you’re deep in the date. After getting to know each other on a deeper level and building a more intimate connection.
Otherwise, it’ll seem like you’re trying too hard to pry
into her personal life. Which will make you look like you have an ulterior
Again, the core point
of how to make a married woman love you and want you is to figure out what
she’s currently lacking in her relationship, and then convince you can give
that to her.
Otherwise, you should proceed as normal and focus on having
a great time with her on your date. Laughing, teasing each other, seeing if you
have good chemistry together and are compatible.
This is the key of how to attract married women successfully and it lies in being discreet and figuring out what they want.
How to attract a married woman at work without getting into trouble
Work environments are a bit different when it comes to
attracting married women.
Because they may end your career if things go wrong and HR
gets notified that you’re hitting on married women.
So, in all honestly, I would sincerely advice against trying
to flirt with married women in your workplace.
But if there’s a woman who’s married and is working where
you are and you KNOW for a fact she’s in an unhappy and unfulfilling marriage,
then of course you should try and fix that.
However, you’ll have to be even more discreet when trying to
flirt with her and talk about the whole thing. Because it’s doubly dangerous
since you don’t want anyone in your work finding out.
That’s why it’s always best to leave these things for afterhours. By nonchalantly and DISCREETLY suggesting a ride home or to grab drinks or coffee after work.
If she accepts, don’t consider it a date but more of a chance
to get to know her. While you’re with her, try to figure out if she’s happy in
her marriage. If she’s not, see if she’s interested in getting out of it and
dating other men. And only then, tell her you actually like her and would like
to take her out, discreetly.
And if there’s a negative reaction, play it off as you just being friendly towards a coworker, without any ulterior motives. Because you were just bored and thought it would be cool to spend some time getting to know the people you work with. This usually works well to avoid potential horrible consequences. And any suits of sexual harassment in the workplace, which can end your career very quickly. That’s how you can attract a married woman at work without it causing problems.
Getting her to leave her husband
Attracting married women to love you inevitably leads to this conclusion if you want to stay together.
So let’s say after figuring out how to flirt with a married woman, you’ve done it successfully. Had several great dates and now know you have amazing chemistry together. You also found out you’re both compatible and can make each other happy in the future.
Now you’ll need to broach the inevitable, all-important
question of “When will you leave your husband for me?” Or even if she’s willing
to at all.
You need to do this eventually because there’s no point in
her dragging out the failed marriage and making things worse by staying put in
a horrible place.
So when’s the best time to do it?
After you’ve already established a sexual relationship and
want to make plans together for the future. Which often means you’ve spent
several months seeing each other.
This will ensure she will actually want to leave her husband
for you because you’ve made it evident that you can have a great time and a
great life together. In addition to being able to give her all the important
things her husband couldn’t, like your affection, time and attention.
Now, when you actually do ask her this important question, you
have to be firm and serious. You’ll also need to set up a boundary and make it
clear to her that you want to have a serious relationship with her. As opposed
to just being a lover from time to time.
I’m against issuing ultimatums to people, but this is one
instance where it’s extremely important to do so.
Tell her you love spending time with her, but you have to know it will lead somewhere. Because you don’t want to waste your time on just being a lover. You want her to leave her husband and be with you instead.
Final thoughts on attracting and flirting with married women
You now know exactly how to attract a married woman to love you, care for you and then leave her husband to be with you.
It’s not just about turning her on and making her wet to have sex with her but about truly figuring out what she’s lacking in her marriage and showing you can provide it.
I sincerely hope you don’t use this knowledge to try and
break up any great marriages. Because that’s very manipulative and extremely
You should only use your knowledge of how to flirt with a married woman to get them away from marriages where they’re extremely unhappy. Otherwise, you’re going to be just as bad as their terrible husbands who they want to leave.
The important point to remember is always discretion. Good luck!
One of the biggest problems that lots of people who come for help have, stems from the fact that they constantly think and feel they’re not good enough for something or someone.
It’s called inadequacy.
So let’s talk about it and about how to stop feeling inadequate with women.
Well, do you realize that the older you get, the more problems you’ll face and the harder life will become?
You’ll get less and less healthy. You’ll have less energy and willpower. You’ll be able to perform less at work. And then you’ll eventually die.
And feeling not good enough for women throughout all of that will just make everything much worse.
So basically, what I’m trying to say is you’re fucked, to begin with.
And I mean proper fucked. Really, royally screwed in the ass.
And it all begins with you getting older. And everyone’s gotta do it eventually. Get older, I mean — not the getting fucked in the ass part.
But I’ll get to that, too. Because life fucks everyone.
Thinking and feeling you’re always not good enough
The most common self-esteem issue I see is people thinking they’re not good enough for anything.
They’re not good enough to work with that. They’re not good enough to study this. They’re not good enough to have lots of money. They’re not good enough to have a beautiful girlfriend.
They think they don’t deserve it.
The list of inadequacies goes on and on. But let’s discuss the main focus of this blog — dating and success with women.
There are TONS of guys who think they’re not good enough to have many awesome women in their lives. And to have a hot, smart and fun girlfriend.
They have it in their heads that they’re somehow subhuman if they can’t go up to a girl and strike up a conversation with her. Then have a fun, interesting, exciting or at least engaging talk together. Share some stories about one another. Connect a little bit and find something you both GENUINELY like about each other. (Which would be the perfect thing and context to compliment someone on, by the way, and the perfect occasion to begin to escalate physically.) While all this time just being a chill, relaxed dude who’s there to have fun with her without having any other expectations besides getting to know her as a person, showcasing your personality and enjoying her company. Because you like what you see.
While also relentlessly teasing her throughout the entire interaction, giving it a flirty, sexy vibe and letting her experience your sense of humor. Being all masculine and shit. Which would be a phenomenal experience for her, if done right, by the way.
And then just go and have sex later because that feels great, too. All because it would just be a normal progression of your interaction with her. Since you’ve both enjoyed each other’s company so much that it feels completely natural to just go and enjoy each other’s bodies as well.
In other words, TO MEET AND GET TO KNOW ANOTHER HUMAN BEING and enjoy each other.
Well, fuck — that does sound like too much work, doesn’t it? And not just work, but like it also takes some special skills and knowledge!
It really is and it does, so relax. Because most men can’t do this seduction dance naturally. Yet they end up feeling like they’re not good enough for women as a result. Thinking that something’s fundamentally wrong with them as a person. Without even realizing that men aren’t supposed to know all this by default.
Men aren’t supposed to be great with women without learning
Truth is, if you can’t seduce an attractive woman quickly and effortlessly as some guys can, it’s totally fine. Since no one is born with excellent social skills and glowing charisma; everyone has to learn and make an effort to acquire these traits and abilities!
Here’s another truth bomb — the most successful guys who are great with women are the ones who make an effort to learn about these skills or acquire them naturally while growing up. Some learn faster than others, but everyone has to go through the process or they won’t see any palpable results.
But if you happen to not be given the opportunity or even the possibility of being social in your youth, you don’t have to be screwed for life as result. Contrary to what many lonely guys believe! You just have to bite the bullet, take the time and make the conscious effort to learn everything on your own, or get some help.
Yet there are so many virgins in their 30s and 40s, it’s embarrassing. Virgins who are terrified of talking to women. Who constantly feel they’re not good enough.
How did they end up this way? Pretty simple — they didn’t take that time nor make the effort to learn all this. They have only themselves to blame.
Here’s what you do to become successful with women:
You need to man the fuck up and get out of the house frequently to go meet other people. That’s the basic gist of it — you have to make an effort to actually go outside where other people are and talk to them. Because if you sit at home and do nothing, you’ll never get anywhere. This first step is crucial.
Go outside to parks, malls, cafes, bars, clubs, beaches or just meet people on the street. Then talk to the ones who don’t seem too busy. About anything that pops into your mind. Hopefully something interesting and relevant.
Focus on learning how to talk to people and not seem too awkward. Awkwardness in itself can almost never be entirely avoided when you’re approaching random strangers on the street. But you can learn to keep it at an absolute bare minimum eventually.
All of this takes practice, like any other skill. That’s why these things are called social skills, duh!
Then, while you’re talking with people, focus on just getting to know them and becoming a better conversationalist, without any other goals in mind. Just for the sake of becoming comfortable talking to random people about random things.
Trust me, many people are lonely and will appreciate talking to someone. While others, of course, will tell you to fuck off, but that’s unavoidable as you’ll inevitably stumble on someone who doesn’t want to talk to you. Or someone who just doesn’t like your ugly mug or whatever garbage you’re spouting.
I’m over-dramatizing here, but seriously, grow the fuck up.
When you take the time to do all that, you’ll have an opportunity to develop the necessary social skills to talk to women as a regular separate skill. You practice and practice, again, just like you’d do with ANY OTHER SKILL.
If you suck, you MUST take the time out of your busy fucking schedule, like 1 hour a day at LEAST and spend it on self-improvement completely. By self-improvement, in this case, I mean anything which will progress you towards becoming better with women and people in general. Anything which will help you attain better social skills.
BECAUSE NO ONE IS GOING TO DO THIS FOR YOU.
This even includes going to the gym. Because if you loathe yourself, thinking no one would want to talk to you since you look like a fat piece of shit, then begin by going to the damn fucking gym for one hour every other day, for starters. You have zero excuses to look like a fat slob unless you have a terminal fucking disease.
Fat slobs whine about why no women want to be with them. Well, would YOU want to be with a fat, ugly woman? How many fat and ugly women have you asked out in your life?
So don’t be a hypocrite and start taking care of your body. Or own that you’re a fat fuck and don’t give a shit about it and stop with all the whining. That will often work since it’s all about your attitude anyway.
Although then you’re bound to die from a heart attack in your mid-40s and 50s, so good luck with that.
Otherwise, I’ll have absolutely no reservations in calling you a fat piece of shit who will end up alone and miserable. Because you’ve earned that fat fate. Because you didn’t strive for something better. Which, again, if you don’t have a crippling or terminal disease, is entirely your fault.
As much as looks don’t matter when you’ve got your shit together and are an awesome guy who has great GAME — they still matter for first impressions. A good-looking fit guy will always have more opportunities to talk to women than someone who’s butt-ugly. It doesn’t necessarily mean he’ll use those opportunities better than the fugly guy and will get more results. Because in the end, it’s all about how good you can make women feel around you. And looks have nothing to do with that.
But since most guys don’t have their shit together and don’t have good GAME — looks matter greatly for their success.
Especially because guys often develop self-esteem issues precisely due to them being fat fucks . . . which messes up their game completely. Which is why it’s important to learn how to stop feeling inadequate.
Back to the main point of feeling not good enough
Apart from getting fit to improve your chances, the absolute best way to become successful with women and other people, in general, is to GO OUTSIDE AND TALK TO PEOPLE. That’s it.
One of the biggest and most common problems for guys who are terrible with women is that they simply don’t know how to engage and normally talk to another person without being weird. How fucked up is that?
Talking to many, many women leads to an understanding of how to talk to other women in the future. I say “Hi!” in person to greet any woman (or man) and then just start talking with her, smiling and enjoying myself because it’s a new experience with someone who I don’t know but am interested in getting to know.
You wouldn’t BELIEVE how fast you’d progress in pickup and how quickly you’d have better social skills and charisma if you took even ONE HOUR out of your day, preferably several times a week, to literally go and approach random women on the street. Or even random men.
Most guys don’t realize that if they just take ONE DAY per week out of their busy schedule, and make it a point to go to some busy spot that day and talk to as many girls as they can, like 20-40-60 or whatever time permits – and do that for a couple of months – it will solve most of their problems with talking to women.
That’s how I started out. I went to towns where no one knows me – picked a busy spot – and TALK TALK TALK. Nothing transformed me more than these experiences.
Yet most guys aren’t willing to do this. Because they’re either lazy or afraid to get out of their comfort zones. And then they whine that they’re useless and no one likes them. And then they start feeling they’re not good enough for women.
Leave your damn house
OF COURSE NO ONE’S GONNA LIKE YOU IF YOU’RE SOME TROLL WHO NEVER LEAVES HIS HOUSE TO TALK TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Again, no one’s going to do this for you. It’s your life and you’re the only person who cares about your success. I’ll say it again and again because you have to take some fucking responsibility for your life.
It’s the only one you have. No one’s going to hand you anything. No one’s going to come up to you and magically give you magic powers to become successful with women.
Pickup gurus and professionals will GLADLY take 1000-10000$ from you to drag you outside to a street, club or bar for a weekend or a week to simply teach you how to talk to people. Hell, if you pay me thousands of dollars. I’ll gladly do the same for you and your results will skyrocket.
And I won’t be doing anything super special, to be honest, just like most pickup guys. I’ll just explain certain things to you that I’ve internalized through experience. And then FORCE you to get out of your comfort zone to approach and talk to literally HUNDREDS of women in a weekend. Which will transform you completely, whether you like it or not.
But why even pay that money when you can DO IT ALL ON YOUR OWN? Just get the fuck out of the house, feel the fear and the approach anxiety and then do it anyway. And TALK TO RANDOM WOMEN ON THE STREET. Those who don’t seem like they’re in a rush. Until your game gets better, then you can even approach those.
If you’re too scared to do it alone, find a buddy and go with him as a wing. It’ll be much easier and you can both learn.
Sure, it’ll take you longer to learn this than if you’ve done it together with a pickup coach. But you’ll save a ton of cash and will still learn just as good, if you put in enough time and effort into it.
Sure, the first 10, 20, 50 or even 100 approaches will be BRUTAL. But then you’ll get used to it and to getting rejected.
And then you’ll be forced to adapt, improvise, improve and overcome.
Hopefully without having to drink some piss, like Bear Grylls over there.
After a few weeks, months, or even years of this, you’ll suddenly find yourself with tons of beautiful women and various friends in your life.
Like one Reddit user called u/ImJustSo pointed out in one of my posts:
It’s hard to convince anyone that they should be out there talking to 10, 20, 30, 80, 100s of men/women a day to get better at it. Unfortunately, it’s the simplest, most efficient way to go about all of this. No formulas, no techniques, no absolutes and universal approaches. All it takes is practice like every other thing we all get good at.
I wish I were a better harmonica, guitar, and ukulele player, but I know what it takes to get there. I don’t try to find some trick that makes me 5 years better than I am. I just pick one up and play it when I have time.
You have a choice — pay a ton of cash to have someone shove you through the motions, or bite the bullet and do it yourself. And if you happen to choose to dump that cash on someone, then dump it on me *wink wink*
In essence, if you confront the world forthrightly, if you stand up for yourself and speak to people in a genuine and authentic manner and accept the consequences of what you’re saying, and if you expose yourself courageously to the things you’re afraid of (in this case, approaching and talking to women), then your life will improve. And so will the lives of the people around you. Because you’ll be a better person for it. And because after having gone through all that, you’ll bring value to everyone you speak to.
But now that we got the “everyone’s shallow at least somewhat” and “how to become successful with women in general” parts out of the way, let’s get to more important things. Like how to stop feeling inadequate through experience. And about the self-esteem issue. And also the getting older thing. And let’s not forget the fucked in the ass thing.
Have you heard the big news yet?
You’re going to die.
Whoops, I hope I didn’t ruin the surprise for you!
But hasn’t anyone ever told you about this? Or were you expecting to live forever?
Then I got some bad news for you, kiddo. Wipe that milk off your face. Because once you do, maybe you’ll recognize your own mortality.
Don’t panic. You’ll soon be dead.
Life will sometimes seem long, tough and tiring. And sometimes you’ll be happy and sometimes you’ll be sad. And then you’ll be old. And then you’ll be dead.
But you don’t get to go out just like that. Nope. The older you’ll get, the more problems you’ll face. Because you won’t be as young anymore. Because you won’t be as agile, virile or youthful anymore. Literally EVERYTHING will become more difficult to do the more you age; moving, talking, sleeping, peeing, fucking, eating, dancing, sitting, and simply existing.
That is if you’re at least somewhat healthy. But if you get some disease or chronic illness or another fucked up condition . . . then I don’t even wanna talk about it — that’s too depressing.
So why are you wasting your time, then? Feeling not good enough for that beautiful girl who you saw and were too afraid to approach.
Feeling you’re not good enough to be with great women is just stupid
What’s the worst thing that could happen if you did approach a girl you’re attracted to?
Would she kick you in the balls? Would she scream bloody rape and murder and all the passers-by would run up and beat you to death with a stick for talking to her?
Would she say “Sorry, I’m not interested” or “I have a boyfriend” and go away? Wow, that last one is probably the most painful, right? FUCKING WRONG!
That last one is, in fact, the best response you can get. Because rejection is a normal and natural part of life.
Everyone gets rejected. There’s not a single guy in the world who wouldn’t get rejected by at least someone. Even Brad Pitt gets rejected. Because every woman as an individual has individual tastes.
No matter who you are, no matter what you do and no matter what you have going on in your life, some people are just not going to like you. Until you realize this fact, you’re life’s gonna be shit.
But also because you LEARN from rejection. And you STOP WASTING TIME after getting rejected. Because you find out that this person wants nothing to do with you, and you MOVE ON to other people.
Until you find someone who thinks you’re great. And even if it takes 1000 approaches, you eventually will.
With billions of people in the world, I like those odds, to be honest. There’s always someone who’s going to think you’re the shit. Just as there’s always someone who’s going to think you’re shit.
Okay, so what’s the best thing that can happen if you approach her? Would she end up your girlfriend, fuckbuddy, wife? Would she agree to have a threesome with you and her gorgeous best friend? Would she fall in love with you forever and you’ll live happily ever after?
Well, why not find out?
Because you feel you’re not good enough for her?!? Ok.
So let’s look at it closely. Who would be good enough for her, then? Some tall, rich, dark, handsome prince in a black Mercedes? Why would he be good enough for her and you wouldn’t, exactly?
What makes him special? Isn’t he a person, just like you?
Or do you consider yourself to not be a person? Are you not a human being?
Are you a slug from outer space then? Or do you simply think you have absolutely no value to offer others? And that makes you think you’re not good enough for her?
Hold on . . . So do you think that the imaginary tall, rich and handsome prince has infinite value to offer her, then? That they wouldn’t ever have any problems, arguments, fights and other bullshit if they hooked up or had a relationship?
Well, do you even know WHAT WOMEN DESIRE FROM MEN?
Oh boy . . . here goes.
What women want and desire from men
I’ll give you a hint: it’s not money (Unless she’s a gold-digger.)
It’s also not looks and not status, contrary to popular belief.
Yeah, all those things are GREAT and they’ll certainly help you get laid a LOT if you’ve got all three of them. But they’re not a requirement, they’re just BONUSES.
These things make everything much easier. But you can get the same results without having any of them. I know I did. And I’m painfully average-looking, have no money to speak of and zero status.
Care to take a guess what women desire? I’ve talked about this before in my article about why women like bad boys so much.
To grossly oversimplify — women want emotions and experiences. That’s their drug of choice above everything else. In fact, it’s also the drug of choice for any person. Because emotions and experiences make life worth living.
Today I’ll talk about how to tell if a girl has a boyfriend or if she’s single and not currently dating someone else.
Let’s say you like that cutie you see every day at the bus stop, but you have no clue whether she’s single or not.
Sure, a polite woman who values her time and yours will let you know right away herself if she’s currently dating someone when you try to ask her out on a date. But what if she doesn’t want to talk about her personal life? How do you know if she’s single or has a boyfriend in that case? How do you make things right and figure out what’s what, without coming off as creepy or weird?
Well, there are a couple of tricks you might want to know which will help you figure things out. Because if you don’t find out how to tell if she has a boyfriend, you’ll end up wasting a lot of time with some women.
I’ll show you some of the biggest signs that she’s single. We’ll take a look at three effective ways to help you tell if the girl you’re into has a boyfriend. So, let’s get started.
How to know if she has a boyfriend or is single
There are three main ways to quickly figure out if she’s single or not. Let’s tackle them one by one, starting with the safest way.
Step 1: Watch her behavior
First of all, pay attention to how she behaves around you and looks at you.
Single girls are walking scanners, looking at certain guys as if they’re potential partners. They look closely at the ones they’re interested in, hoping to get their attention.
Have you ever noticed how girls fix their hair, bite their lips or try to show off their best features when they’re standing near guys they like? Signs like these say a lot about whether a girl has a boyfriend or if she’s single and actively looking to date someone. So make sure you pay attention to them.
In fact, some women can even tell if a man is rich or married just by looking at him. It’s all about body language, posture and the way someone carries themselves.
Now, what’s the best spot where single women can find a candidate for a one night stand? That’s right, a nightclub. If you meet a girl there, you can pretty much be certain that she’s not dating anybody right now. Because if she was, she’d be with him somewhere and not partying with other guys. Oh, and don’t mind her friends: If she brings company with her, this doesn’t mean she’s not looking for a good time. Single girls party hard, attracting as much attention as possible.
Also, a girl who doesn’t have a boyfriend always tries to look sexy. You’ve seen such singles a thousand times: high heels, a mini-skirt, a plunging neckline blouse, a short top, flashy makeup, and so on. Single women pick their clothes and accessories to accentuate their features and to look as sexy and as enticing as possible. And I’m sure you already know that such outfits attract attention no worse than a new blender in a store on Black Friday.
Now, I’m not trying to offend all the girls who have boyfriends. I’m just trying to explain how to tell if a girl has a boyfriend. But single ladies are a bit better at taking good care of themselves. Because they always have to be in tip-top form to attract the best man. And those who embrace the happiness of a romantic relationship, mostly dress to impress only that one person. They don’t try to seduce guys around them so they don’t try to dress as provocatively and sexy as possible every time they go out.
Singles actually care significantly more about what’s in their wardrobe and it doesn’t matter how much it costs to look gorgeous. However, this rule doesn’t apply to all girls: some women just don’t want to stand out from the crowd. And some women don’t give a damn about trying to impress anyone with their features or the way they dress.
Suffice it to say, when learning how to tell if a girl is single, pay attention to the behavior of women around you and notice if they dress to impress. Ask yourself the question “Does she want to meet a great guy behaving and dressing like this, or does she not care?” and observe her. Then, if you’re sharp enough, you’ll quickly get your answer without having to do much work.
Observing women for signs that they’re available takes a little bit of practice. But with time you’ll be a master of knowing how to tell if she is single or currently has a boyfriend.
Plus, being aware of all the main signs that a girl likes you will do wonders for your ability to tell if they have boyfriends or not as well. Because when you notice women not showing any signs of interest towards guys, it mostly means they’re already taken.
Another great way how to tell if she has a boyfriend or not is to go through some of her social media accounts.
In this age of technological progress, a person who’s not registered on at least one social network is a rarity. Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Snapchat, Kik, and dozens of other websites lure thousands of users into their web every single day. It’s unbelievable how much information about a person you can find by simply checking their LinkedIn profile. No wonder the next way to find out if the girl’s dating someone or if she’s single is cyber spying.
To find out if she has a boyfriend, just visit her account and take a look at her photos and posts. And don’t forget to check out the “Family and relationships” tab. Because if your potential companion’s not a lazybones, then she probably filled it.
Also, there are some girls who just can’t shut up about their feelings. It’s neither good or bad, it’s just how they are. These women will usually post a lot of lovey-dovey stuff like “Can I possibly love him stronger?” or “I can’t imagine my life without his hands, eyes, and lips.” (Geez, are you sure you want to deal with this?)
As for singles, they’ll either criticize the concept of a relationship itself or, again, post some lovey-dovey stuff but from a different perspective. For example, “I wish I could fall in love again…” Such phrases are only a small part of what you can come across on a single (and naïve) chick’s Facebook page. Take them into account — you don’t need to reinvent the wheel when everything is simple and transparent like that. And if you still doubt whether the girl’s single or not, send her a friendship request. Her reaction will speak for her.
In case you don’t want to bother poking around people’s personal life, there are faster and easier ways to find single ladies online. Various dating sites, apps, and similar places will have many women who are proud to show their “Single” status so there’s no confusion. Then you won’t even have to try learning how to tell if a girl has a boyfriend.
In any case, going through a girl’s social media accounts is one of the easiest and fastest ways to see if she’s single or has a boyfriend.
Step 3: How to tell if she has a boyfriend? Ask her directly!
Why not? When chatting with the girl you like, I’m sure you’d be interested in finding out if she’s single as soon as you can. Because if you’re interested in her in a romantic way and don’t want to be just friends, you need to figure this out quickly. Or there’s a decent chance you’ll be wasting your time with her if she already has a boyfriend and doesn’t want to date anyone else. This is exactly why it’s important to know how to tell if a girl has a boyfriend.
As for the right approach, you should communicate sincerely; otherwise, the atmosphere between you may get a bit electric. And I’m not talking about the good kind of electric. I mean that if you’re being dishonest and insincere, she may end up hating your guts. And you definitely don’t want that.
However, you should also try to avoid putting her in an embarrassing situation with questions like “So, are you dating someone or what?” two minutes after you’ve met. That’s definitely not a good way of trying to figure out how to tell if a girl is taken or single. Since asking someone this question right away can quickly turn everything into a very awkward moment if they thought you just came up to them for a friendly chat.
So, before asking this specific question, don’t rush things. Talk to her, get to know her a bit, have fun with her, tease her lightheartedly, do some light banter and show your personality to her. Eventually, flirt with her a bit if she’s having fun with you as well and enjoys your conversation. And after a while, when you’ve seen that she enjoys your company and likes you, only then ask her. This doesn’t have to take long, it can be anywhere after 5-20 minutes. Depending on how receptive she is and how well you’ve hit it off. This way it’ll be much less awkward and more sincere. Plus, she’ll be much more likely to accept to go on a date with you if you do it like this.
Here’s how to ask if she has a boyfriend:
After ‘the foundation’ is laid, say something like “I’m having such a great time with you and I’ve been meaning to ask you something. Are you single?”
Or if you don’t want to be that direct, a simple “I’m really enjoying talking to you. Want to go grab a coffee with me later?” Because she won’t accept to go on a date with you if she’s already taken and has a boyfriend anyway.
If she answers negatively and has a boyfriend, then there’s nothing much you can do about it. Just say something like “Oh, that’s cool. It was really nice talking to you.” and excuse yourself. Then, move on to other girls. Eventually, you’ll find a girl you like who’s single and available to go on dates with you. Learn how to approach and talk to girls to increase your success significantly.
If she answers positively, then don’t hesitate and ask her out! Read a few tips here on how to ask a girl out and get a yes.And thank your lucky stars she’s been upfront with you since you took the most direct path of how to tell if a girl has a boyfriend or not
A couple of practical recommendations when figuring out if she’s single
Aside from discussing how to know if she’s dating other guys, here are a couple of things you should consider:
— Some guys try to act like they don’t care when they find out that the girl is dating someone when in fact they instantly turn hostile, vile, weird and pissed off. This is a sign of extremely low self-esteem. Such an approach will scare any potential companion off, so don’t use it. Keep chatting as if nothing happened, don’t panic, don’t scream, accept her choice.
— If you’re sure that she has a boyfriend, but you see that she’s still interested in you, you have a couple of choices. You can say “Sorry, I don’t date unavailable women” because that’s the right thing to do. Or you can try to win her over. It all depends on your priorities, her situation, how her boyfriend’s treating her, their relationship with each other, etc. If you decide to try and win her over, then be a gentleman about it, but with a twist. Talk about something edgy (sex, family, etc.). Get into her head, but not too deeply. Create lots of emotions, stir her feelings and you’ll have a good chance. Basically, if she sees you’re a bad boy who can get her to experience tons of strong emotions with you, you can win her over easily.
— Don’t ask her if she has someone if your conversation isn’t private. First, it’s unacceptable. Second, you don’t need to let out details of your personal life to everyone around you.
— What if she has a boyfriend?
Don’t focus on this question. There are guys who are scared of approaching girls just because they think they’re not single. Not cool! Even if you think that your the girl you’re interested in has a boyfriend but you’re still into her, then go on, approach her anyway. You have nothing to lose.
And if she tells you she has a boyfriend, so what? The world won’t fall apart. Besides, she may not say that. Or maybe she doesn’t have a boyfriend. Or maybe this girl will give you the best night of your life. Maybe you’ll build a life-long relationship with her. And if you miss your chance, then none of this will happen. Think about it.
At worst, she’ll confirm your suspicions and you’ll have spent 5-15 minutes talking to her. But you’ll improve your social skills as a result and learn how to tell if a girl has a boyfriend much better. So approaching girls who you think may not be single is a very wise choice because you never know their situation fully and you don’t know how things will turn out. Having this mindset is crucial when learning how to tell if a girl is single
Oh, and you don’t want to become her number two anyway. If she likes you and wants to date you, then you should insist on her breaking up with her (ex-) boyfriend. After all, if she’s cheating on him with you, then she’s actually cheating on you, too. And where’s the guarantee that she won’t do the same to you? You don’t want to be in this poor guy’s place, right?
— How to steal the girl from her boyfriend
To be honest, it’s better to find a single girl, but you never know when you need extra advice. That’s why learning how to know if she has a boyfriend is important in the first place.
However, there are certain cases when you should still pursue a woman even if she has a boyfriend. In cases where her boyfriend is abusive or when the relationship is at the brink of ending.
Sometimes it’s easy to spot how fragile and unstable the relationship between two people is. If you know what’s going on between the girl you like and her boyfriend, then you get a huge advantage. All you need to do is show her that you don’t share his shortcomings and that she’s way better off being with you. If her partner lacks what’s needed to keep this girl by his side and their relationship is in shambles because of this, you can get her away from him. It’s not so difficult, especially if the girl is aware of her relationship being a mess.
But don’t be too persistent. No one likes obsessive people. And don’t do this if you’re just interested in a one night stand or something similar. Because that’d just make you a huge dick.
Bottom line on how to tell if a girl has a boyfriend or not
Don’t lose self-confidence. Even if you think she may not be single, go and find out. There are many signs that she is single and you may have missed some.
You wouldn’t believe how many guys lose out on great relationship opportunities because they’re not confident enough to approach a girl. They psyche themselves out and then talk themselves out of approaching her at all. Don’t be like that because you’ll always miss 100% of the chances you don’t take.
And what else? Well, figuring out how to tell if a girl has a boyfriend is, in fact, the first and probably the easiest step of all. Because when you finally learn that a girl is single and ask her out, you need to make sure you know what to do on your date for it to end well. Because there’s nothing worse than going on a date and ruining your chances with the girl, and ending up going home alone. Never to see her again.