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I've noticed something quite interesting. A couple of weeks ago I said to myself I wouldn't eat any wheat products for about a month simply to get to root of a health issue I suspect. Since that decision I've binged on breads, pastries etc more than I ever have prior to this decision. I do say that's partly due to me not meal prepping so this makes these convenient foods even more desirable. That said 60% of the week is me overindulging. Work can leave me worn out, semi stressed, and very little time to myself so eating my pain if you will is so easy rather than facing what's truly bothering me. Why can I not say no to these foods albeit temporarily? Why am I choosing to make myself feel sickly. When I hadn't set any 'rules' regarding my nutrition I actually rarely gravitated towards processed food.

From experience and research binge eating to me mostly comes down to not wanting to feel any emotional discomfort so numbing out is the easier option. I also haven't had the time to workout as o would like due to a busier work schedule so that method of release is currently not available.

I'm writing this to unload my thoughts from between my ears. I must say its very therapeutic.

Moving forward, I think I'm going to pull back the reigns a little and pause this nutritional boundary I've set for myself until my relationship around food is steady and non self destructive. I need to face any deep seeded issues I've been masking with food. If I could take an educated guess I would say I'm not at all satisfied with where I currently am in my life. Where I see myself and where I am seem quite far apart but it isn't unattainable that's for sure. I feel I out too much pressure on myself to be perfect when perfect doesn't actually exist. I'm chasing the best way to be but I need to okay and see the value of imperfection.

What I plan on doing is to:

  1. Sit with myself and truly get to the cause of my unfulfillment
  2. Make the week easier on myself nutritionally by actually preparing for it. Having the right things in place I.e bulk cooked food, go to snacks etc.
  3. Make time to exercise consistently even if it means I won't be able to workout as long I would like or it being perfect.
  4. Find healthy ways to de - load.

I know food isn't going to solve my problems and now that I'm aware of it I feel liberated.

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In 2017, I binged very occasionally and always on “healthy” foods. Somehow I managed to lose 30lbs despite weekly binges on protein bars and Brussels sprouts.

In January 2018, I was at my lowest weight. Finally normal after a lifetime of being overweight and obese. I quit my job to spend 5 months traveling solo around the world.

Well, if you’ve seen my posts, you know that binge eating was my main concern over the past 5 months. I always said I’d stop in the next city but I never did. I would eat host’s food or go to the grocery and buy dozens of pastries. I didn’t have a scale or weekly weigh ins, so I didn’t know how bad it was.

I just got back and I gained 20lbs. My clothes barely fit. I feel ashamed to see any of my friends or my ex.

I don’t know what made it click, but returning home eliminated the urge to binge. I’m finally getting back into my gym routine and I have the freedom to make my own healthy food. I’m disgusted by what I’ve done to myself, but I feel like I’m back on track to get where I was pre-trip. I only regret how much time and money I wasted binging on the trip. And how much energy I spent trying not to but failing.

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I’m a 17 year old girl who has had a series of eating issues. Last summer I lost a small amount of weight after rejecting food for a long period of time. And I’d have episodes like that every so often after that.

But now that I have a job and money, I just binge. Mostly fast food and potato chips. Almost every day. Today was especially bad. I got McDonald’s for breakfast, Taco Bell for an after school snack, and just got Arby’s for dinner. 3,100+ calories. I spend more than half my paycheck on fast food and coffee (the coffee I’m not too worried about). I don’t eat anything healthy. I barely drink water. I don’t know why. I grew up in a house of TV dinners and eating out so maybe that’s why. I don’t know.

I haven’t been diagnosed with any disorder mostly because I’m too scared to go to the doctor and I’m too scared of getting yelled at by my parents. (They’re not very supportive to say the least...)

I’ve tried to express my feelings to my friends. But they don’t get it. I’m 5’3 and 121 pounds (which makes me sad as I hate being that much). All I get is “You’re still super skinny.” “It’s not that big a deal.”

I’m going to get a heart attack before I’m 30 if I don’t stop. I just don’t know how. I’m sorry. I just needed to vent or something.

submitted by /u/BeautifulRebellion
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Hi guys. New here. Made a throwaway because I’m extremely embarrassed of myself. Was chubby in high school because I ate whatever I wanted without a care in the world. Hey, at least I was happy. College stress led to unhealthy eating habits and caused me to drop 15 pounds. Yay for a normal weight. Somehow, the downward spiral began. I’m not sure why I started binging. I got into fitness and eating healthy and was feeling good. Then I started counting calories (I guess that’s probably why lol). I don’t binge at home (which is odd because I live alone and have all the privacy in the world to do it) probably because I don’t keep any “unhealthy” foods in my house. I binge at friends houses and families houses. I’m visiting my parents right now and just ate myself sick after they went to bed. My stomach hurts. My mouth hurts. I hate myself. I can’t tell anyone though. My boyfriend doesn’t get it. My parents are proud of me for having healthy eating habits because they are both slightly overweight. My friends see me as a fit and healthy person. I hate having this secret.

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I'm sad and defeated. I just want to fix what I've done to myself, mentally and physically. But I feel somewhat ashamed at what I've done to myself. I disgust myself when I eat, and I don't eat for hunger. I eat for no reason and food is CONSTANTLY on my mind. I either starve myself or eat so much for weeks that I can't eat anymore or I'll vomit. Physically, I've been told by my boyfriend that I haven't gained hundreds of pounds. I just know I look noticeably bigger with my height and frame and I have body dysmorphia and used to struggle with anorexia, so there's no words to describe how I feel on an everyday basis dealing with this. I want to get help but where would I even get it? Why do people act like this isn't a horrible disorder? :( I just want to lay in bed and never come out.

submitted by /u/islesoflightlessbird
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It helps to have support and conversation with those that truly understand.

submitted by /u/delasestrellas4444
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For those of you who take Vyvanse, when do you take it? My binging happens at night and I'm afraid if I take it in the morning, I'll still binge at night...

submitted by /u/dearalie
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hello!!! I've started to notice that one of my triggers is stress (usually associated with schoolwork) and not feeling like I have enough time to do things I want to do. i have also been intermittent fasting, and had a headache this morning (i believe from the stress & a bit of hunger?) and for some reason felt it justified a binge. i stopped calorie counting, but still tend to count them in my head because i want to lose weight (terrible, i know. i'm a runner and i want to get back in shape for my season. i think it's just leading to more binges but i feel so out of shape and terrible about myself.) the intermittent fasting does stop my night binges. today i got home from school with the intention of starting this huge research paper, but instead i binged. now, 4 hours later, i'm sitting with a foggy mind, regret, and frustration. i didn't make it on my morning walk, and i intended to run today, but now i don't have enough time since i have so much to do for the paper, and i feel disgusting from the binge. homework isn't something i can just "not do"— but it stresses me out. i need to get back in shape for running to meet my person goals and the standards my coach has, but every time i take a step forward, i feel like i take two back because of the binges. any tips??? i really, really, desperately want to break this cycle.

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Years and years of binge eating disorder has really damaged my body, especially it's ability to digest foods. I have been feeling increasingly ill(sluggish, bloeated, body pains etc. and I won't even get started on mental health!) since.. For ever, really, but my digestion(sorry if it's TMI) has really stopped working and I started looking pregnant every time I ate something, followed by painful cramps and exhaustion. It sounds like allergy, but it isn't. Might be intolerances due to eating so much bad stuff over the years. However:

I decided to do a sort of "elimination diet" to find out what I was reacting to, if there was anything I was reacting to. But as I'm no nutritionist I have no idea what I am doing, so I decided to start slow and just cut out gluten for 14 days. No biggie really, I just binged on other stuff. But I felt a bit less bloated, so I stuck to it. After three weeks I wanted to try to cut out sugar for a week also, and so I have. I binged on a lot of sugar free stuff and also just on foods, so I didn't decrease amounts of food, but my bingeing is almost automatic so I don't think too much when it's happening; I just make/buy ca. the same amounts of food I binge on just without sugar or gluten. And I feel so full! After only eating 50% of what I used to eat!

I don't even think I have an intolerance but these 2 restrictions just keep me from ordering fast foods and actually needing to make (at least som of) my food. I don't know what it is, but it is helping me with bingeing. Thus, clearing my head a lot. And it really is nice!

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