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“It was wholly unlike the ‘Permitted Style’, and she could see the people’s awe and distant wonder…” Introduction S. had a large, square, middle-aged face, with a massive projecting nose and long-lashed, pale blue eyes. When she was smiling to herself, her face shone pink and childish. She was like one of those extinct birds, the Alagoas foliage-gleaner, once found in northeast Brazil, because she wore that elaborate hairstyle of a curiously improbable shade of orange. S. used to dress as if she had no sense of proportion, but that was not her fault. The colors were always pyrotechnical, and that was not her fault either. She was undeniably slender, and ponderably light, and … proveably short. When people had wished to distinguish her from the others, they had always called her the miniature one. You may be waved coldly away or permitted to the circle of chosen ones. Which way you’ll go depends on the vibes of your feelings toward yourself and the creases on your clothes. If you wear your garments with handsome, proud, and shifting to the necessity of the situation style – the feeling of respect will be breaking the farthest walls of ignorance and negligence. The magic of presentation, which will get you far in career and love, is in exhibited strength of self-worth and in a most exuberant and elegant cover. The luxuriant combination of body-positive image and fashion in the right size will dissolve the world of prejudice. Set your teeth with determination to be in the mood and in style. No one will dare to grudge you if you set your social barometer at ‘positively sunny’ and ‘upliftingly uncloudy’. Read more: Body Positive Attitude & Its Story in a Context:4 Principles That Make Sport No Labor at All 1) Regardless of Their Size, Every Woman Is an Apotheosis of Fashionable Nobility and Strives to Be in Style S. had a sneaking mania for a fashionable style, particularly when she saw a slender tall body wearing it. But the reality was the indispensable psychological crisis – she couldn’t find the same garments to fit her petite form. She went over her situation multiple times: her eye always seeing the beauty and elegance, and her mind always seeing her expectations to fit her romantically proportioned body ruined. The good Fashion Icons were doubtless acquainted with the explanation for this dilemma, but they for sure kept it to themselves. There was no way to find a perfect fit in the stores for grown-ups, and S. was empty-hearted when heading to the kids’ section all over again. Women used to be almost swept away by the continually unsuccessful shopping experience. We all desire to parade among our acquaintances in the outfits tailored handsomely and becoming. But we used to be constantly pained by the sight of the fashionable dresses and blouses with shoulders too wide and waists too low. That wretched mental stupor, the fashion industry used to be in, finally seemed to lighten. Inclusive sizing becomes a good business strategy even for many haute couture houses. Women of different shapes want to be true to the trend and be part of a modern fashionable movement. Inclusive sizing is more than just the first subtle outcropping in the fashion industry, it is a re-creating mountain that is going to influence many things in the world. Finally, 00, petite, and plus-sizes are not treated as problems to be solved, but as realities respected and rightfully enlisted in life and business. Read more: 4 Ways to Be Always Elegant Even If You Are Constantly out of Style 2) Social Media Is a Majestic Influencer and Manifests the True Body Image One-day S. turned everything in her wardrobe topsy-turvy and inside out. The whole place was utterly destroyed as if by an earthquake, but it was only her frustration burning. With half-shut eyes she was laying on the floor in the middle of that devastation in a perfect unrelaxation. S. decided to make a try for Paradise, whatever might be the result, and create her own line of “Fashion for Petite”. She decided to be happy even if it would cost her all honesty and money. S. shouldered her way in social media and added a rousing intellectual kick to the whole industry, driving change and building her own followings. Social media has a sneaking mania to kick start trends in fashion, particularly when used to illustrate diversity and body-accepting concepts. Nowadays everything is ridiculously exhilarated, beautifully abnormal, and deliciously insane. Gradually our vision is gaining in focus, and we wear confident faces and elegant outfits. We comprehend a whole world of advice and insider knowledge available with renewed vigor. Scrolling with the thumb, we become thankful for the positive impact on our sense of worth. Consumers, those who buy, drink the cup of influence and shape the trends. Read more: 'Draculas’ of Today - Energy Vampires: 8 Types of Vampires and 4 Major Life-Survival Strategies 3) Clothes Have About Them Something Irretrievably Thought-Provoking for People Around S. was certain there was more behind the image of a model than what we had seen and heard. Close to evil curiosity mingled well with cynical determination and the remnants of her personal story made her walk about with gathered truth and all the abandonment of courage on a podium on a Fashion Week in LA. The organization was dedicated to raising the profile of fashion with focus on the emergence of the new growing community of artists and designers that were proclaiming self-expression and celebrating body difference. S. produced unique and immersive fashion, showcasing her newest collections for women of all shapes. She was dedicated to support apparel of elegance and style for short and tall, slim and plump, embracing self-acceptance. One can be much muddled about the whole thing of fashion and style. But there is no way to deny the communication that our fashion choices create. Intentionally or unconsciously we arrest the mind with meaning and the eyes with color. Our clothes become an investment into a favorable or unfavorable impression. Everyone wants to cuddle the minds of others by pleasant confidence and friendly acceptance. Every detail about our demeanor and outer wrapping speaks volumes about us. Read more: Self-Compassion as a Powerful Way to Avoid Destructive Patterns of Fear, Negativity, and Isolation 4) Your Thoughts Become Invested with Certain Clothes’ Method S. regained her good spirits. She was in sympathy with her beautiful improved self, and inclined to joy and merry-making. The mystic cords of affection were stirred by smart and elegant dressing habit she adopted and promoted. Her style sent messages to her mind and the minds of others about self-respect and professional balance . S. was the admired and the sought-for. The independence of success now made its first faint showing in making her thoughts positive, her creativity flourishing, and her decision making excellent. All was ripe for the message she shared. There was no need for fishing for customers, she was respected and distinguished. There is something in the ensemble we wear that at once sends messages to our mind and the minds of others. We are alive with thoughts and feelings concerning our looks. New research shows that our confidence and sense of self-empowerment are impacted by the choice of our dress. Professional outfit increases decision-making skills and overall presentation. It creates social distance and broadens our perspective, allowing us to see the problem in a new detached way. Our thoughts take the color of our clothing. One can look simple and charming, and that will strengthen the desire to connect with other people. And being very much aware that you look stunning can bring closer the desire to bestow a little attention to a beloved person. Read more: Regret - an Enemy that Prevents You from Being Happy: 6 Ways to Get Rid of It Read more in my books Conclusion In the fashion industry the whole intensity of the diversity and nature was distilling itself. S. felt herself an indispensable part of the new movement. She felt that she would promise anything, everything to disentangle women and men from the beliefs in the conventional visual landscape of the beautiful person. She was anxious to turn the talk to broadening the very narrow rules existent for what was considered ‘beautiful’. And her passion had gotten to that stage now where it was no longer inner calling but a contagious, great, and brilliant movement. The fashion industry should strike a chord that can find sympathetic response in our lives – to treat everyone with dignity and respect. It must not suppress self-expression and creativity. If we choose our personal presentation with care, we are able to radiate an atmosphere which we desire to create. Things can straighten out with the help of clothes, accessories, hairstyle, fragrance, posture, body language, tone of voice, and the energy released. Allow yourself to enjoy the pleasure of mentally stepping into a picture of fastidious comfort and confidence. Dress accordingly and feel attractive. Stay tuned… #OlyaAmanovaSAPblog #OlyaAmanovaBooks #OlyaAmanovaQuotes #StoriesAboutPeopleBlog #OlyaAmanovaSAPtalk #happiness #followmyblog #contentment #howtofindcontentment #love #gh #quote #compassion #peace #blogger #blog #ontheblog #IndieAuthors #writerblock #writersnetwork #amwriting #amediting #howtolive #familylife #inspiration #feelings #garments #style #respect #ignorance #presentation #career #selfworth #bodypositiveimage #prejudice #mood #size #slender #shoppingexperience #outfits #dresses #blouses #fashionindustry #business #influence #wardrobe #socialmedia #fashioninfluencers #fashionadvice #fashionknowledge #shapeofthebody #fashiontrends #clothes #communication #relationship #friendlyacceptance #clothesmessage #weartherightthing #sizefit #confidence #selfempowerment #professionaloutfit #decisionmaking #problemsolving #fashionindustry #accessories #hairstyle #fragrance #posture #bodylanguage #toneofvoice #energyrelease #dressaccordigly #feelatractive
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“There is no place for guilt in the pursuit of perfection…” Introduction P. is a gifted being. She’s a clever girl – with a strong will and a high temper. She is better worth looking at than most works of art. P. is a middle-aged woman of many fitness theories. Her imagination in that respect is remarkably active. She has a fixed determination to regard sport as a place of brightness, of free expansion, of irresistible action. Now P. knows that it is detestable to be afraid or ashamed of her body. This life-changing understanding came with physical pain and spiritual tension. Every moment of life is a little eternity. Guilt and a sense of worthlessness are needless matters and have to be eliminated. Negative self-talk puts you on the dark side of life. The feeling that you ‘need’ to work out should not bring an evident distress. Sport, when putting you in the full vigor of your personality, does not diminish you spiritually. I know so many women who keep their weight at a certain point of personal satisfaction, not giving any consideration to the opinion of others. And I know so many women, who lost pounds of ‘extra weight’ and whose inner glow had faded with it. Whatever else is gone, you have to keep the fire of life. There is no need to work yourself up to such a pitch that you endanger your health in the pursuit of some body ideal shape that was not even intended for you. To work your body and spirit to the breaking point day in and day out is a path to quarrels, battles, challenges, wounds, wooings, agonies, and all sorts of impossible nonsense. The whole fabric of inventions and conventions in the sports industry should be true to you, be of your world and your history. Then, and only then, it will become your reality. There is just the right thing for YOU. It is not the same for everybody and there’s nothing wrong with that. You may need some push and self-assertiveness, in the short term, to get ahead in your healthy life routine. But, in the long term, it is your body and your health and your choice. Let exercise help you to control appetite, boost mood, and improve sleep for you. And be the one for whom the faculty of becoming healthier is much bigger than the desire to shape yourself to the taste of the crowd. Read more: An Exhilarating Effect of Natural Water:5 Facts the Heart & the Reason Are Struggling to Understand 1) Being Hard and Uncompromising on Yourself Can Lead to Injuries At the beginning of P.’s career as a fitness trainer, her enthusiasm had led her into a thousand of ridiculous zigzags. Her desire to look very well and to be even better, her determination to see, to try, to know as much as it was possible in the industry of healthy diet and physical exercise caused a disastrous injury to her back. P.’s combination of the delicate, enthusiastic, flame-like spirit and the eager desire to get well again made her reevaluate her life experience. She decided to never again be an easy victim of negative self-criticism. Her reputation of a spotless fitness queen hung about her like the cloudy envelope of a dense chokedamp fog. She was in constant need to keep her attitude at a high temperature, motivate people around, be a role model for them. The weight of this responsibility made the poor woman hate the label ‘perfect’ and still be chained to it by expectations. To her true self the term had always suggested something grotesque and even sinister, and people using it – offensive or alarming. The experience of having an injury can be a delicate torment and you may end up working different muscle groups for some days or stick with as little resistance as possible. Other injuries, though, can force you to allow yourself a time off, and there is nothing wrong with it. To listen to your body and recognize when you need a break is normal. This major inconvenience may serve as a learning process, an opportunity to express self-respect. Your muscles are your wonderful friends that are true to you if you give them time to repair, strengthen, and grow. The gym room is invaded by beautiful women and dashing men, you are one of them. Some experience problems learning what to do with one’s hands and workout tools. Some are pleasantly familiar with the surroundings and seem to be just in the right place. People around, whose feelings you cannot penetrate, can look IN shape and in the reality be OUT of heart. They keep lifting heavy weights and wrung their heart. The muscles of our souls are so thin and far-away at times, so clap-trap and yet so heart-breaking. Overtraining your body muscles you risk to inflict a serious injury and complications later down the road. More significant damage, though, can be from the clouded, obscure, elliptical picture of your inner state. You need to learn to take some rest when your body is asking for it. To do that once or twice a week is not only a good thing, but a necessary one. Our body isn’t designed to be pushed without limit. Personal growth happens outside of the classroom and, likewise, you gain muscle outside of the gym. You can express vividness of self-value by listening to your body and taking easy at times. Read more: How to Find Contentment in Life: 5 Life-Changing Things You Need to Know 2) ‘Ideal Weight’ Is the Weight That You Slip Quietly into and Feel at Home In That experience of professional injury struck P. as food for deep reflection. She appeared to enjoy that time of real excuse from the strenuous rhythm of exercises. That feeling was unfamiliar, as if she was not accustomed indeed, to keep her spirit free of bolts. She eventually became thankful to make use of that time alone. P. could see without judging the depth of her nature. She realized that sport was taking a lot of her life, but not all of it. She was more than that. Her flexible beautiful figure could turn itself easily this way and that, but her alert mind could do more, could invent her own way of doing all that she did in her professional life. P. became aware of a step forward in her self-awareness. Her gratitude was growing with her understanding of herself. She came to the point when no criticism could break the sunshine of her life. She accepted imperfection as a gift, some degree of weakness and free pass as a sign of self-love and not a failure. She stopped feeling herself in bitter waters of competitive environment, where she needed to be on top of her niche and fight for every client. She felt at ease. That new state of emotions told her to seek for her personal unique way to be successful and still involved in her beloved sport with love and self-acceptance hand in hand. ‘Ideal Weight’ - this term can be applied to so many different aspects of well-being. It is the state when your body is appreciative to what you do and gives a favorable interpretation to all physical activity you WANT to perform. It is a feeling of energetic enthusiasm, and a desire to put in new steps and slides into your daily routine. In YOUR perfect body you are able to dance against and around the hard-and-fast beat of life. If you are breathing hard - you may have some extra couple pounds to work on, but if you are a cheerful and lovely plump beautiful lady that is not out of breath – so be it! – You Are in Your Perfect Shape! Read more: How to Get Worry and Anxiety Out of Your Life: 6 Steps to End Chronic Worrying 3) In the Undergrowth of Sport Is a Body-Positive Attitude Needless to add, but P. saw a happy face in the mirror more often now with her spine still in pain every now and then and her movements restricted. The weight she lifted was too heavy and almost made her an invalid, but it also freed her spirit. She was full of volcanic energy and desire to tell her story of personal mental transformation. P. improved spiritually and physically under strain that would have killed a weaker nature. What followed is enough to uplift any person. P. was quite ‘blowing the trumpet’ for the people who went to the gym to preserve the shape that they had learned to love and respect, accepting that some things were better the way they were and to inflict any drastic change in some cases meant to endanger the health. Nature does not make mistakes. There are times when extra pounds for one person are an undesired thing and a complete necessity for another. Self-worth teaches you to live in the atmosphere of endeavor, of expectancy and bright hopefulness about the way your body looks like. It is a state of mental awakening, when you are able to introduce yourself to a more rounded concept of fitness. Every individual taste, every natural aptitude is different. You should not live under a tyranny of gym if you do not feel like it is your cup. Ecstatic dance, immersive Morning Gloryville, or hula-hoop hip-swinging and waist-twisting fun – one of these alternative fitness programs may have a peculiarly engaging quality for you. If you focus on lifestyle and attitude and not as much on aesthetics, you will go to the gym because you feel great and you want to prolong this feeling as long as you can. You will exercise because you feel as if every inch of you is charged with energy that makes itself felt for a long time afterward. You should not be negative or perfunctory about your body. Your self-acceptance, a body-positive attitude will guide you on a way of healthy eating and working not as much on the shape of the body, but, rather, on feeling good. Read more: Self-Compassion as a Powerful Way to Avoid Destructive Patterns of Fear, Negativity, and Isolation 4) Ability to See Beauty in the Body-Context The whole new life for P. was now an unutterable mixture of healthy lifestyle and healthy attitude toward herself. She went through the recovery process with patience and meditation. She was saying things to herself that touched her heart to the quick. All her behavior changed and was indicative of thought and power. She felt blessed in her life. P. reasoned well, and her wit was bold. She started afresh and her imagination was getting on fire. P. was driving at a new understanding of fitness culture. There was a method in everything she was doing. The rudimentary idea in her mind was about the strong nature of every person and the need to get to know it. Without this essential aspect any work was inwardly against a person’s health. The cultural conversation around the body is like a revolution. Now every woman on the images we see are often telling their own story and it sounds like a festival of truth and self-love. These women acquired celebrity by sharing those stories and awakening awareness of what they’ve experienced. We are not tossed down blindfold on any pretty cover anymore. Now we can see beauty in the body-context. When you don’t want to be someone else and are entirely happy and complete in your body, you feel the exultation of victory over unattainable beauty and weight ideas. It is a great transfiguration, embracing diversity in shapes, skin types and physical conditions. People in fashion are not able to dictate one particular model of fashionability anymore. Social media influencers throughout different channels rouse the old ideas of perfection from the torpor in which it seemed to live. Every step that modeling agencies like Zebedee Management are taking toward relieving the world from obligations, added to it in order to restrict expansion and individuality, is bringing fashion industry up to date. We are no longer content to ‘feed upon opinion’ of a small select group of people. More and more models are spreading the message of embracing what you have and telling the true story. Our own narratives, their unique connotation through the impressions of other people, invite us to see beauty in strange and turbulent, fantastic and plaintive. Read more: Exercising from Scratch: 5 Easy Ways to Get Started Read more in my books Conclusion An absolutely open mind, an iron self-belief, a temper of the cheerful and uplifting kind, self-understanding, and toleration of imperfections regarding them as blessings, and the kindliest and truest attitude – these form of equipment for the workout P. encourages every person to get. Her all-embracing sympathy is working for her good and the good of every client in her private gym. Her teaching began to manifest its potency. People are holding P.’s services dear. She is helping many of them to bear up, to get through tough times. Those who came to hate their body for the lack of response to the strenuous training, finally saw their victory in self-acceptance and their mastery in love and respect to the body that was now a true friend and a beloved companion. P. is admitting everybody, down-facing nobody. If one cannot fully agree with her new way of thinking, she accepts the fact that there are things in life that you cannot out-argue. In time, people get tired from a sick feeling of suspense, expectance of a failure, a day when you are not able to say ‘I have to do that’. In time, their heart becomes attuned to their inner nature. Fashion has a big scheme on hand. It wants to talk more about diversity, about enjoying the feel of movement and dance and less about sweating and counting calories. Now we are focused on nurturing body-respect and self-worth, becoming more familiar with it for our own comfort and peace of mind. We should have a strong will to roar above the level plain of tradition and prejudice. When you become familiar and confidential with your looks, with your body, that makes sport no labor at all. And it is a sad spectacle to see some people bruised and injured when in a state of obsession, ever pressing themselves upon the image of ‘perfect beauty’. Your cheerfulness is unbounded when it is matched by your love to yourself, acceptance of your looks, and self-awareness. Lend yourself to a sport of your choice with no regret for the brake if you need one. Your soulful and poignant longing for a better you is wonderful. And even more delightful is the state of happiness from being alive and breathing, from the feeling of union with the sunlight, the color, the odors, and the luxuriant warmth of the day. This state is possible only when you embrace your personal context and feel no shame if people are able to read it. Stay tuned… #OlyaAmanovaSAPblog #OlyaAmanovaBooks #OlyaAmanovaQuotes #StoriesAboutPeopleBlog #OlyaAmanovaSAPtalk #happiness #followmyblog #contentment #howtofindcontentment #love #gh #quote #compassion #peace #blogger #blog #ontheblog #IndieAuthors #writerblock #writersnetwork #amwriting #amediting #howtolive #familylife #wordgasm #bloggersgetsocial #newblogpost #healing #sport #bodypositivity #positiveattittude #bodycontext #guilt #worthlessness #distress #spirituality #woman #satisfaction #negativeselftalk #challenges #inventions #truestory #healthylife #improvesleep #selfassertiveness #wounds #injuries #experience #feelings #weightloss #muscle #damage #rest #personalgrowth #gainmuscle #idealweight #energy #beinshape #beautiful #selfworth #exercise #selfacceptance #eatinghealthy #feelinggood #culturalconversation #revolution #festival #happy #fashion #ZebedeeManagement #models #message #weboflife #environment #music #freedom #landscape #recreation #peace #relationship #mentalhealth #soul #spiritual #respect #emotion #essence #wellbeing #balance #fragrance #inspiring #depression #anger #positiveemotion #problemsolving #aggression #agitation #guidance #therapist #meditation #tranquility #positivethinking #stress #burnout #satisfaction #yoga #walking #awareness #sorrow #gratitude
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“The voice of natural water sounds silver and life…” Introduction Five friends, and five personifications of extraordinarity, extreme extravagance, and exquisite exclusiveness. And ‘Yes’ all five are the Ex-es of former husbands and wives. What in the Universe can they all have in common? Water! To be more exact, $900 that they pay for 8.4oz of pure water that exists in a very remote place in Venezuela. It just tickles me to death to tell you the back- and fore-story of these very well-off people – very well-off indeed they are. A – a High-class jeweler, B – an owner of a High-end shopping center, C – a president of a High-cost Healthy Food Corporation, D – a head of a High-net-worth investment firm, And E – a CEO and founder of a High-quality cosmetic company. And now, you’re being so darned plucky, know the names of my high-grade protagonists. Everything in their lives is top, elite, and upscale. No thing about water is an illusion. Nothing in the world is softer and more yielding than water. Being of incomparable docility, not anyone can concur it. We do not realize how close and almost identical we are. Water wears down the hard and strong and none can overcome it. When our strength husbanded, we are capable of glorious things just the like. Is it possible to live by that truth? Do we dare to accept that the yielding concurs the strong, and the soft overcomes the hard? Maybe we should not take any precaution that prudence could suggest and let ourselves be lost in wonderings and half-terrified admiration at the spectacle of life. Let us be free, give ourselves no concern on the opinion of others and be brave to be true selves. Read more: A Charming Benefit of Ecotherapy:5 Healing Techniques to Tone Your Life and Stay Connected to Nature 1) Secrets About Water That Were Put to the Proof “What the dickens, do you drink this water for?” said A. deprecatingly, when his dog fired ahead to the water that was spilled on the floor. The bottle it came from was a gift that A. didn’t appreciate enough. He considered it a wired birthday present. His dog was a much better expert in a healthy way of life, eating only food in green packages with the logo “organic” on it. And he never before ate anything from the floor, preferring his silver plate to any other vessel. A. felt that he had to learn more about this water and happened to learn that he, being an educated two- and forty-years old guy, didn’t know anything AT ALL about this substance. Magnetism and energy locked in this bottle transformed his life. The honored lady that presented the fortunate flask became an open-hearted salutation in his life. Her kind soul wrapped in a beautiful body revealed the hidden secret of life: that happiness, when shared with a loving person, ultimately compels you to experience satori or instant awakening. You go from enchantment to enchantment, scenting compassion in the air, and this feeling of admiration gives a new turn to your thoughts. Water is the only substance on the planet that can exist in three states: liquid, solid, and gas. A human being combines all three of them at the same time. Depending on age we are made of 70 to 80 percent water. Yet our body, like a precious vessel, holds this treasured liquid by the forth of a life-giving spirit. I’m so much taken up with the power and diversity of water. It has the highest surface tension than all other liquids. It proofs for me the fact that a person with pure ‘inner waters’ can overcome any outside pressure. Water is the most powerful solvent on Earth. Isn’t it about our ability to sympathize and be compassionate? Life on any planet is not possible without each and every property that water has. That means that stepping into another person’s shoes and feeling his sorrow, pain, or happiness is essential for life itself. Water is able to rise through the trunks of gigantic trees against tens of atmospheres of pressure. What is more surprising, though, is the faculty of a human being to rise over hatred and aggression in the world, indifference and treasury towards himself and still be loving and empathetic. The natural water from a spring is loaded with energies in the utmost degree. When compared with the artificially purified one, it turns out that they still have the same composition H2O but their structure differs drastically. Most likely a person won’t see any difference but any animal will always choose the natural water over the tap one. Limited abilities of our animal friends make them more sensitive and prone to distinguish false from the truth in the world that surrounds them. Can we learn all over again to feel life as it is, pure, refreshing, full of love and gratification? To sense good-natured people, take to them and cringe away from the blows of cruelty in time to escape the shock. That would mean to trust the nature outside and the one inside. To be able to accept the identical composition of each and every person and their unique individual structure, and if not love everybody, but at the very least respect. Read more: How to Find Contentment in Life: 5 Life-Changing Things You Need to Know 2) The Imminent Danger of Water’s Memory and Its Unbreakable Vehemence B. was a successful woman that seemed to have everything but for the memory of her early childhood and youth. That was strange, she possessed the necessary knowledge and education to be adequate and navigate her way in the world, but she could not remember the words said by her mother, and the school games went with her father. That happened after the car crash that left her, a single child of a happy middle-aged couple, an orphan. Doctors said it was a post-stress reaction of her brain. The neatly structured organ in her head tried to protect her against her will. She longed to remember, but not any conventional or alternative medicine could help her to do that. One day, about 5 years ago, her close friend came back from her long journey to the far away countries. She brought exclamations of praise and deep respect to the elderly healer she met there. A. didn’t really believe it could work and agreed to go only for the sake of adventure. The ceremony of their encounter reminded a scene from a mystery movie. B. and a small wrinkly guy in a dress-like white shirt were staring at one another blankly without words. Then he showed her to his chamber. The cave was dark and cold and full of small and big glass jars with water. He filled her little cup from almost every container. And at the point of over dense tension in the easy to guess area in her belly, something extraordinary happened. She suddenly remembered. Spring water from a distant mountain village in Kazakhstan brought relieve to her tired from searching brain. It happened so, that her father was born in that village. Her parents, being almost desperate to conceive, went there and spent almost a year in that remote place. They came back to the States to give birth to their beloved daughter and get the benefit of traditional high quality medical care. The water from that village remembered B., or, rather, her body remembered that water. Some impulse, the live energy coming from this water, triggered the processes in her brain, making the memory of her past a charming reality, that she could take into her present. Scientists made a great step forward admitting, that they know almost nothing about water. We can do just as much, agreeing that the process of self-discovery is never ending. This realization is followed by the desire to explore more, to dive into the research and self-digging, and –developing. Nowhere in the world is water the same. And the water structure of each person’s body is identical to the water structure of the place where he was born. Our internal connection to our homeland is depicted in the water of that place. ‘Inner waters’ remember everything, and the water of our birthplace remembers each and every one of us. Experiments in many countries around the world have shown that water remembers everything that occurs in the space that surrounds it. Our ancestors guessed this when they used silver vessels to turn ordinary water into a healing one. As it records information, water acquires new properties, yet its chemical composition remains unchanged. The structure of water means how its molecules are organized. They form clusters of various forms, and each combination is vulnerable to any external influence. The same happens with people. We come to contact with each other and live a trace in our souls of emotions felt and events underwent. Every encounter becomes imprinted in our ‘inner waters’. To our eyes the change is not noticeable. The same face looks at you from the mirror, but the conversation with an angry person left an undertaste of failure and depression in your soul. The looks are important, but our inner structure is a much more valuable instrument. The inner state of our soul is composed of our emotions and feelings joined together. Our inner water-based computer records the whole history of our relationship with the world around us. Modern instruments have made it possible to see how water, being structured like a nervous system, reacts to any irritation. Being subjected to swiftly freezing process in a cryogenic chamber, water tells us its story. The spectacle of frozen crystals reveals to us the admiration of water when someone said 'I love you' to it. Classical music gives water an occasion for displaying splendor of symmetric beauty. As if choosing music that uplifts and rejuvenates us, we should be spellbound listening to a loving person, and determined to run away from twisted and vengeful ones. Read more: How to Get Worry and Anxiety Out of Your Life: 6 Steps to End Chronic Worrying 3) Human Power Both Whitens and Darkens Water and Souls C. was spending time in a company of people always grabbing after money. Everything ‘healthy’ was in trend and he was getting incredibly rich by the day. Surprisingly, C. was the most negligent person when it came to the choice of places to eat. His ex-wife took very good care of his diet, but being a cold-hearted person she made C. detest anything good-looking, tasty, and healthy. He developed a belief that things like that, being eatable or not, are pretty in the outside and empty in the inside. After the divorce, C. became a regular visitor to fast food places, which made him look 10 years older and 30 pounds heavier. C. thought bad about the food he ate and drinks he swallowed. All those substances made him feel even more depressed until the day he met J. She was incredibly plump and extremely cheerful. She was a friend and companion such as few possessed. Her spirit was contented and grateful. It seemed that nothing can spoil her positive attitude to life, even C.’s negative connotation of every aspect of it. They ate at the same bad-quality-food places, but he felt his body not as heavy and his mood not as gloomy anymore. Somehow, J.’s uplifting spirit charged every object with her life-giving energy. When they started to live together and J. became a master of the kitchen space, life became almost an unbearably sweet experience. Both C. and J. started to fall in love with their family business, discovering new aspects of vigorous and healthy life. By degrees and due to the plenitude of means, they started to spend quite ridiculous money on food, and water was a number one investment in their list of most important things. Their company invented a different culture. A life of luxurious energy in an 8.4oz bottle. Having ones tried it, anyone could ill bear to part with this sensation of ‘alive’ and ‘pure’. Nowadays it became clear that positive and negative human emotions are the strongest elements of influence on water. Scientist conducted many experiments on this fact. The water, experiencing fear, aggression, hatred projected on it, is suffering. Those feelings deform its structure and reduce its energy. Love, on the contrary, increases water’s energy and stabilizes its structure. The power of tenderness and compassion is yet unexplained but accepted by almost everyone’s intellect. We should let this knowledge penetrate our skin and reach straight to our heart to be fully implemented in life. Our soul can mingle dignity and gratitude under the influence of delightful emotions and sublime energy. Read more: Self-Compassion as a Powerful Way to Avoid Destructive Patterns of Fear, Negativity, and Isolation 4) The Defeated State of Water - Ready to Drain and Disrupt New York is a place of contrasts. You can be wealthy and still live in a place with bad water from the tap. Filters made it bearably pure but far from being deliciously tasty. D. knew the flavor of pure water. It was his bug-bear fault. He was in search of the right taste for many years. The one that can charge you with energy and make you feel full of desire to change the world. D. was born in West Virginia, an eastern state with tree-covered Appalachian Mountains and the purest water on Earth, as he thought. He missed it enormously. His wearisome search ended when he tried water in a $900 8.4oz bottle. It was love from the first drop. The sensation was unforgettable, as if all his cares and sorrows went away, living a feeling of being light and kind, sociable and agreeable. His intellect agreed with his heart and D. became the first serious investor in a Healthy Food Corporation and a devoted friend to the family who owned it. Close minded people, with the same size of wallets, seem to attract each other. Now D. was a regular guest in C.’s beautiful villa. He was well rewarded for his taste with rejuvenation in a bottle and honorable friendship in his life. Water makes a long and difficult journey through multiple angle turns before arriving in our homes. In nature rivers and streams always flow along a smoothly curving course. The natural structure of the water breaks down more and more with each turn. The crystals of such water deformed, no symmetry or beauty could be seen. Aggressive chemical purification, powerful filters, the violence of it all is accumulated, forever remembered by water. Spiritual pollution we subject ourselves to is even more harmful. The water on our table adapts all of the hatred and the stress and by the time it enters our body we make it dead. In a language of an Indian tribe in Venezuela ‘Roraima’ is translated as the mother of all water. Scientists considered that it has never been in direct contact with human beings. It exists in a very remote place. The journey through the savanna and the jungles, and then up an 800-meter wall in order to rich the water in its unique and virgin state requires significant enthusiasm. In a laboratory the scientists could see the energy light that shines from this water. They compared it with an ordinary one and discovered that Venezuela’s water is 40 thousand times more active. Can you imagine what power is locked in every mouthful of it? It activates the body, grants life in its purity to every cell in our body. The same effect on our ‘inner waters’, the state of our health and mood, is made by the outside violence. Anything made to us against our will is detestable by our nature. Our nervous system is prone to become restless and let the negative take possession of it. If there is no way to escape the harmful influence, we should find our own filters. To deal with it without any chemicals but with the help of recharging, rejuvenating meditation, preferably in natural surroundings, is the best purification process that was discovered so far. A state when you reunite with your inner pure child is blissful and can be reached with some training and effort. The only remembrance of that glorious feeling can transform our inner water clusters into beautiful stars, with symmetry of butterflies and crystal transparency of spring water. Read more: Gratitude as a Kind of Intellectual Advantage: 6 Ways to Make Your Peace with the World 5) Water Combats Behavior and Life Itself E. was successful and beautiful. She never imagined herself being a head of a cosmetic company, but her parents left her no choice. She dreamed to be a pianist. Her parents’ opposition was a blow that shook her tremendously. To make amends they gifted her with the most expensive piece of music art - one million dollars piano. This masterpiece was a remarkable, diamond and jewel piano that exhibited about 100,000 jewels that were individually polished by hand-cut glasses. This musical bond to the family business now was unbreakable. The magnificent instrument in her living room was her best friend. Every day after work she hurried home to her soulmate and discussed Mozart, Bach, and Beethoven with him. The decanter full of water was on the nearby table and she had a habit to take it to her dinner table and later to her bad. This water seemed to be full of notes of love and care, beauty and affection. She took good care of her water and filled the vessel with the best of the best. Played music to it and made every note enter into her soul and her body. She drank it with satisfaction and felt refreshed, delighted, invigorated. She was forgetting her cares, feeling as if she had wings to her feet. This sense of exhilaration increased each time she filled her glass with Venezuela’s water charged with the music of her heart. It was established that the behavior can be changed using only water. In addition to ordinary water heavy water exists in nature. Deuterium2O. The splitting of deuterium was the bases for creation of the most destructive bomb. We all know what radioactive radiation can do. It turns out, though, that rather more horrific is the change in the structure of water. It made no difference where the test was carried out, in the atmosphere, in the ground or underground – the water’s memory changed. Waves die out fairly quickly in the ground, but the water continues to fluctuate for another 30 days. The brain is made of water about 85% and the conflict between the water structure occurs in it. It disrupts the brain’s bioplasm and the person is deprived even such extremely important incentive as the drive to live. Ne pathological changes in the water increase the number of suicides. The same way one person can have a radius of his influence much bigger than the universally accepted personal space distance. We are connected with each other. Who ever gave voice to his pen knows the speed with which the word is spread. Any emotion radiates energy, and every movement carries meaning in it. And this energy travels through time and space with horrific swiftness. Energy of every person can be radioactive at times. In this case, one should keep himself to himself and away from everybody. And it is a great privilege to spread love when it overflows your being. Water gives life. Its original vitality we can use either in a positive way or we can charge it with entirely different emotions. The way we approach water determines our whole life. Good intentions improve the quality of water and it has a positively boosting effect on a person. Radioactive relationship, on the contrary, can force a human being to spend his enormous inner capabilities entirely in doing bad to himself... and others. There is nothing like a cheerful mind to relieve our spirits from torturing feelings and make us hug ourselves and the world around with love and affection. Read more: Regret - an Enemy that Prevents You from Being Happy: 6 Ways to Get Rid of It Read more in my books Conclusion No scientist has been able to explain why water’s density increases, expands below the freezing point and becomes less above freezing. In life like in water, true relationship increases its density when below the freezing point of separation and sometimes too much interference in each other’s space can make that density diminish. Any false attachment lessens in its strength when miles and days are between the two, just as any other substance but water contracts when it is cooled. Every living thing is essentially a container of water. Life has a chance to happen only in the presence of water. When we attempt to discover life on other planets the first thing we look for is water. Everything begins its life in water and through the course of life thrives to achieve perfection. Self-purification is a never-ending life-defining process that we attempt to be good at every day. A person is water. Science only seems to begin understanding what our ancestors have known many centuries ago. It turns out that the emotions and people we take with us when sitting at the dining table determine the beneficial or harmful effect of food on our health. Being the most common substance on Earth, water drives us to our wits’ end by acting as a ‘leader’ of our lives. It is a unique concept that is connected in a special way with the very idea of life. We are not even beginning to traverse its special qualities. One thing we can count as a known fact: even if the elements of human nature handled you roughly, remember that love as life itself has a chance to occur only in the presence of natural pure water. Stay tuned… #OlyaAmanovaSAPblog #OlyaAmanovaBooks #OlyaAmanovaQuotes #StoriesAboutPeopleBlog #OlyaAmanovaSAPtalk #happiness #followmyblog #contentment #howtofindcontentment #love #gh #quote #compassion #peace #blogger #blog #ontheblog #IndieAuthors #writerblock #writersnetwork #amwriting #amediting #howtolive #familylife #wordgasm #bloggersgetsocial #newblogpost #healing #ecotherapy #connectedness #nature #improvinglife #ecopsychology #weboflife #environment #music #freedom #landscape #recreation #peace #mountains #water #relationship #mentalhealth #soul #earth #population #humanity #creation #harmony #spiritual #respect #emotion #essence #wellbeing #balance #fragrance #inspiring #depression #anger #positiveemotion #problemsolving #aggression #agitation #animals #naturesounds #guidance #therapist #meditation #tranquility #positivethinking #planting #seedling #gardenbeds #trimming #stress #burnout #wildlife #domesticanimals #exercise #satisfaction #yoga #walking #awareness #flora #fauna #country #watering #sorrow #gratitude #sorrow #gratitude
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“Receive life with much philosophy and nature…” Introduction G. shuffled through life most of the time being far gone indeed. His mood being as dark as the grave, his face being as weary as the days of his past, and his voice as harsh as the hollow moaning of the damp unwholesome wind. He was not yet past 36 and the earth and life itself seemed not his element anymore. The expression in his eyes was scarcely of his age or of the world. So many shadows from the past played about his face that G’s smile, above all, was the worst evidence of artless pain and misery. The horrors of the war left no trace of the memory of happier existence, long gone by and forgotten, vanished in the scenes of fighting and killing. These marks of cruelty and anger buried every trace of love and affection he had ever known. It seemed that nothing in this world would be able to recall any positive emotion in his soul. Darkness and nightmares watched G. as he slept and was awake. The sinking of soul and spirit is alleviated by emergent field of ecopsychology. It awakens the remembrance of our connectedness to the web of life. We need to be careful about how we deal with nature as we are an inseparable part of it. Blithesome environmental music and freedom in the landscape carry thoughts of recreation and peace to the hearts of people. Remorse may seem unavailing, but it creeps away when met with brightness and mirth in the scenes of brilliant sky, vast fields, and high mountains. Our relationship with nature should be explored and nowadays mental health practitioners pay more and more attention to the aspects of ecotherapy. The inner impulses of every person’s soul long to be connected to the environment. Read more: Self-Compassion as a Powerful Way to Avoid Destructive Patterns of Fear, Negativity, and Isolation 1) Connectedness to Earth as the Core of Ecotherapy G. was a true personage of an uncouth man with sharp eyes and rough hands. The fervent prayers, gushing from the hearts of his many relatives, overcharged with wild nature and simple close to deprivation and far from cruelty life, were his daily companions in his youth. Exposure to the wet morning grass, cold fresh mountain air, and many animal-friends brought on belief in good, frank, and honest which hung over him till the first days on a battlefield, those reduced G. and his faith sadly. An effort to come back to his native place was the only way to recover his life force back again. The earth does as much for us as could be expected in an age when the population cannot afford to stay connected to it for nothing. Relationship among humanity is built on the principle of giving and taking and the same motto we tend to express toward everyone and everything. Nature, though, is worn with use, disheartened with selfishness, and tired of human contact. We should attribute exceptional importance to the process of creation, the natural forces that govern life. Harmonizing with these systems, we may experience spiritual illumination, improved mental and physical health. Respect in every aspect of life is vital. To cherish nature as we cherish close loving people is just as important. Love given to the human being revives life forces in that person, and the same emotion granted to the surrounding environment awakens its blooming essence. Personal well-being is lost amid a host of every-day troubles, filled with artificial noises that stifle and destroy, it becomes empty and arid. To not let it slip away completely we need to stay connected to planetary well-being. This feeling of union with a greater system of interaction makes a sense of weakness and captivity vanish. Only when seeing ourselves as a part of the world we can recover our balance and will-power. Read more: How to Find Contentment in Life: 5 Life-Changing Things You Need to Know 2) Nature as a Tender Healer of Mental Fatigue Only coming back home to his old and shabby house, senile forgetful mother, simplehearted coarse childhood friends, and his ancient failing horse, he began, at length, by degrees, to get better. How deeply G. felt the goodness of his surrounding in his native mountain village, and how strongly regretted he that the ill-advised desire to escape in a search of a better life led him to the war. Whirred, monotonous and tiresome as a clock life, words thrown out, conversations started, then the concert of mentally fatiguing angry emotions – this existence makes a wall against which one dashes in vain. To stop that deafening and blinding cycle we need to walk in a nature preserve. No voices for lying, no faces to hide themselves behind – only the vastness of fragrances, nature sounds, and beautiful inspiring scenes. The atmosphere of inhaled, tasted, touched, heard and seen satisfaction reduces the symptoms of depression, we feel less anger and more positive emotions. All senses participate in the recovering process. Engulfed in the brightness of green spaces we have a greater capacity for paying attention, delaying gratification, and even less need in pain medications. Simply calling flowers and plants into view positively affects creativity, productivity, and problem-solving skills. Over-wrought nerves, aggression, and agitation are waved away as if with the help of magic wand in the presence of animals and under the exposure to the sounds of nature. Read more: How to Get Worry and Anxiety Out of Your Life: 6 Steps to End Chronic Worrying 3) Activities that Add Variety to Life and Bring Back Glorification Who can describe beauty and tranquility of a mountain river and snow covered tops and hollows? Is it possible to imagine life without the pureness of that balmy air full of grass’ and flowers’ fragrance? The green hills and rich animal life, only touched by hunting in necessity degree and never in pleasure seeking unwise killing. Life as it should be, love as it was created, and friendship as it was intended – healing emotions, and curing energies of nature didn’t wash away crowded, pent-up memories of the war, but life of toil and peace in the atmosphere of pure, almost untouched plant and animal life made those memories Past, and not Every-Day-Haunting Nightmares of the present anymore. Nature can talk the language of healing and we can understand it with some guidance of a therapist or even without it. We all have a natural aptitude to comprehend it. 1. Fresh sensations revealed during meditation. Even when it seems that the world had been turned upside down, a tranquil moment of abstractedness can put it right-side up again. We are able to come over to the positive way of thinking after reflection on the connectedness of all alive and breathing. 2. Horticultural therapy reveals to us the ability of the earth to give a sensation of maternal protection to our senses. Garden-related activities of digging soil, planting seedlings, weeding garden beds, trimming leaves help to alleviate the symptoms of stress and burnout. 3. Animal-assisted therapy is at the service of reducing aggression and agitation. Animals are able to pure out more of the treasures of our souls than we could even imagine. Often after the time spent in the company of wild or domestic animals we feel intoxicated with delight and happy sensations. 4. Physical exercise in a natural setting brings us closer to the feeling of satisfaction with our mind and body. We become more independent, more inspired and even more In Spirit – inspiration visits us while we are walking, jogging, cycling or doing yoga outside. 5. Increased awareness is reached when we are involved in restoring activities. A sense of purpose and hopefulness, belonging and connectedness is born during the process of generous improvement done To and For the benefit of nature. Read more: Regret - an Enemy that Prevents You from Being Happy: 6 Ways to Get Rid of It Read more in my books Conclusion G. started a chain reaction of a nature healing process, in which his own rejuvenated personality was the first link, by contacting his battle comrades and inviting them to visit his poor farm. G. could not even imagine the outcome of his good intention. Now the place is the most blessed, homely ecotherapy healing work-camp known so far. People in mental struggle come from all over the world to find contentment and peace again. Working together, improving their life, cultivating earth and personalities, they share memories and feelings. Here again, they can feel themselves the most blessed and favored of mortals and have a touch of unmingled happiness. True felicity of pure and most amiable generosity of people around; the warmest, soul-felt gratitude creates an attachment to the place and mental state of peace itself. The earth in her mantle of brightest green is glad to accept wounded hearts and treat them with cheerful serenity that gives vent to the tears which now a person is unable to repress. And when the eyes are full of water, the remedial river is covering the troubles of today and the worries of the past. The influence of flora and fauna changes the condition of our thoughts and feelings considerably to the better. Scouring the country revives the feeling of freshness and newness in life. Troubles seem not to hang as heavy on one’s hands when those applied with redoubled assiduity to the work of planting, trimming, weeding and watering – beautifying surrounding and purifying souls. The sorrow and calamity of the world half closes, becomes more distant when you feel that you belong to the bright sphere of nature. There is no pursuit more worthy of the highest nature that resides in every one of us than encouraging the circulation of deep affection and gratitude toward nature. The sacred emotion of connectedness to the earth makes fears weak and selfish regrets feeble. Stay tuned… #OlyaAmanovaSAPblog #OlyaAmanovaBooks #OlyaAmanovaQuotes #StoriesAboutPeopleBlog #OlyaAmanovaSAPtalk #happiness #followmyblog #contentment #howtofindcontentment #love #gh #quote #compassion #peace #blogger #blog #ontheblog #IndieAuthors #writerblock #writersnetwork #amwriting #amediting #howtolive #familylife #wordgasm #bloggersgetsocial #newblogpost #healing #ecotherapy #connectedness #nature #improvinglife #ecopsychology #weboflife #environment #music #freedom #landscape #recreation #peace #mountains #sky #relationship #mentalhealth #soul #earth #population #humanity #creation #harmony #spiritual #respect #emotion #essence #wellbeing #balance #fragrance #inspiring #depression #anger #positiveemotion #problemsolving #aggression #agitation #animals #naturesounds #guidance #therapist #meditation #tranquility #positivethinking #planting #seedling #gardenbeds #trimming #stress #burnout #wildlife #domesticanimals #exercise #satisfaction #jogging #yoga #walking #awareness #flora #fauna #country #watering #trimming #sorrow #gratitude
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“Take the misery of negative self-judgment in a luxuriously calm refuge-island of self-compassion…” Introduction It is difficult to assign any precise age to V. because he is so full of the ignorance and illusions of youth. His eye alight with certain native intelligence making him a fair example of the erudite class. His mission in life is to draw little audible links, chaining together great inaudible feelings of self-compassion and self-esteem. V’s Ph.D. dissertation on this subject is but the vague shadow of the volumes he has to say. This mental activity was instigated by an economic crisis in his life and a complete change of life views and values that followed it. When V. falls into a train of observations on this topic, I feel how it absorbs my fancy. Self-compassion makes you move forward through stormy seas of negative self-judgment. Like a ship, it wallows along to the island of tranquil and comfortable repose. Being kind to yourself means to stop the arduous and exhilarating process of idle and erratic life-cycle. To learn the art of positive self-evaluation is essential. Become a fair judge of your own weaknesses and a virtuoso in the art of self-admiration. To feel unique and special you need to be resourceful in finding inner instruments to make yourself believe in it. Call your faults your own and keep it private, insistently sound in your ears your inner and outer graces, make them an emblem, your trademark – known and accepted by others. Self-compassion is an irradiation personified, which lights up your entire being with positive emotions. It represents all the vast conscious world of contentment because it soothes the troubled spirits. Read more: What to Do When a Painful Loss Is Piercing Your Heart: 4 Healing Techniques​​​ 1) Scientist Map the Advantages of Self-Compassion When V. was in his last year in the human development doctoral program at the University of California he was going through a very difficult time. He used to be a person of dazzling interest and attraction when he possessed the means to wish and fancy, to obtain and secure everything he desired. A climax of his life was pending. His father lost every dollar they had in a risky market deal. Now his passions went ringing home unsatisfied and he could not find any sympathetic response in his surroundings. Prejudice and discrimination were the downsides of his high self-esteem and harsh self-criticism. Feeling the drag of a lean and narrow life of anxiety and depression that followed that financial devastation, V. suffered from fits of narcissistic, self-absorbing anger. The first note of compassion washes away anxiety. It was suggested by the science that self-compassion slows down the heart rate and the oxytocin (the bonding hormone) is secreted, it lights up regions of the brain linked to empathy, pleasure, and caregiving. Self-compassion serves as spiritual aid that floors depression and raises a person’s self-esteem a good deal higher. Read more: Distractive Loneliness and Positive Solitude: 6 Kinds of Loneliness and 3 Ways to Confront It 2) Self-Kindness Punctuates Life with Self-Understanding V. was an excellent student of a great educational establishment and a bad pupil of the school of life. He considered his youthful energies mis-spent and all priceless treasured lavished. V. was poorly equipped to live frugally and happily, rather he was prone to make up in negative judgmental feelings what he lacked in dollar bills. V. used to be a typical ‘mazhor’ (a kid of wealthy parents). He snapped his fingers and had everything he wished. When his family’s money vanished, he entered the narcotic state of self-denial. V. simply lost his place in the world, thinking that material positions were the only means determining it. Three months in a rehabilitation clinic draw a straight line between his past and his present. V. learned all over again to establish contact with people, their engaging characters and charismas, when prior, he labeled any new acquaintance either as a ‘valuable’ or ‘useless’ connection. Self-compassion eludes good intentions and satisfies those by self-kindness and sympathy to others. It murmurs to your essence that virtually you have a system of values and you respect yourself for it. It tells you that you are not a loose thinker and you can evaluate people and situations from the point of understanding and justification. It tells you to resist the temptation to harshly criticize and judge yourself and others. Read more: How to Get Worry and Anxiety Out of Your Life: 6 Steps to End Chronic Worrying 3) Self-Compassion Is Marked by Benefits of Self-Esteem Without Its Drawbacks V. plunged into the healing process by accepting the notion that self-criticism made dread and awe creep upon him. V. started by being cheap enough in regrets, doubts, and self-bitterness and added to his life the rich touch of self-understanding, -acceptance, and -praise. Self-acceptance gave him power enough to open his heart to the ability to dream gloriously over future and he spared neither effort nor determination to make himself a better person not by beating himself up all the time but by being kind to himself, and … to others. The neat calligraphy of self-compassion lacks mistakes that quick-fingered self-criticism, a product of high self-esteem, always makes. We all have misprints, but comparing ourselves to others rarely does any good. Embrace yourself for the things you have to share rather than for the things you have to keep and the mess up game will be sensibly diminished if not wholly lapsed. Remember that self-compassion may still carry in its pocket some of the small change of failure, but it holds to it just to make you accountable and toned, ready to get up again and move, once knocked out by some challenge. Read more: ‘Draculas’ of Today - Energy Vampires: 8 Types of Vampires and 4 Major Life-Survival Strategies 4) Self-Compassion Prevents Criticism from Holding Back Your Personal Growth V.’s state was one of the loneliness and forsakenness which struck a deep chord in his soul. He was determined not to let his few supports float away from him. Those load-bearing walls were empathy, caregiving, and feeling of self-compassion. He needed to add more happiness, optimism, and positive emotions to his life to be able to find new friends, ready to accept him with the whole fabric of his timid personality and teach him to understand the keener pleasures of life without an abundance of money. Self-compassion grants you with the ability to follow the text of life and read between the lines. The full potential in life is reached when you are alive with thoughts and feelings concerning others that are freed from judgment and negative connotation of any sort. There is no basis for growth in putting others down so that you can feel good in comparison. Let your imagination take a flight and instead of labeling yourself and others ‘good’ or ‘bad’ simply accept things as they are, because being not perfect means to be unique. Because when you open your heart and show kindness and care towards yourself and others you start a chain reaction of good intentions and positive vibrations. This is contagious and there is no better epidemic to set alight and contaminate others with. Read more: Competition with Yourself as a Way to Success: 3 Major Reasons to Stick to It Through Thick and Thin 5) Self-Compassion Kindles a Sense of Belonging and Connectedness V. realized that feeling himself a part of the human creation offered peace of heart and mind. Only when he openly sought refuge from a cold, calculating, and an unpoetic monetary-based world of exceeding self-esteem in a quiet harbor of open communication and sincere attachment was he able to accept himself with all his retrospective shame at the memory and prospective delight of the present. Being rich in empathy and compassion, gifted with an ability to appreciate the beauty and richness of life, even in hard times – that colored a world for him in charming gratified desires and nurturing flourishing feelings. Self-compassion drains the cup of common experience. Knowledge, that comes only when communicated; understanding, that is accepted only when discussed; emotions, that felt only when shared – self-compassion makes all of it possible. Humanity tells about nature and freedom, highest power and engaging connectedness to the world. We need to learn to listen to that valuable information. Attachment to humanity is the only way to diminish suffering. Isolation lacks not only in social quality, but in self-worth itself. To live means to feel what others feel, to see what others show, and express what you have to share. Read more: Gratitude as a Kind of Intellectual Advantage: 6 Ways to Make Your Peace with the World 6) Self-Compassion Helps to Achieve Balanced Awareness Now V. claimed to have the poetry enough in him to seek out an open heart in himself and straighten his life in a balanced heartfelt and mindful way. He was not ignoring his past but he was no longer exaggerating his own misconduct. Self-compassion teaches you to accept the pain and explain the reasons for it. You may not get the answer right away but it will teach you to wait patiently and admit the fact that life is painful sometimes. Being mindful is to be flexible, but not too useful, ripe, but not too final. The process of growth and improvement should never stop and cultivating yourself is a life-defining principle. Intuitive good nature that is in everyone flourishes under the sun of self-compassion. Read more in my books Conclusion V. is imperfect yet magnificent as every one of us is. When he stopped an endless comparison game and embraced what he could share with others rather than what he had for himself his self-esteem gave him joy, and his self-worth became much less easily shaken. Self-compassion helps to achieve emotional well-being which strengthens the daring to life of any person. It holds your peace and helps to feel the beauty of life even in hard times. It shuts out negative perception and opens up individuality in a person, makes one being present at the moment regardless of the degree of involvement of others around. You seem to radiate an atmosphere of power and productiveness even facing unpleasant feedback about yourself. There is nothing in this world more delightful than that state when you mentally balance between self-worth and acceptance of imperfections in yourself and in the world around. Being compassionate toward yourself means to be an apt student of fortune’s ways – of luck in life, because positive emotions attract uplifting feelings, delightful people, and magic metamorphoses in life and love. Stay tuned… #OlyaAmanovaSAPblog #OlyaAmanovaBooks #OlyaAmanovaQuotes #StoriesAboutPeopleBlog #OlyaAmanovaSAPtalk #happiness #followmyblog #contentment #howtofindcontentment #love #gh #quote #compassion #peace #blogger #blog #ontheblog #IndieAuthors #writerblock #writersnetwork #amwriting #amediting #howtolive #familylife #wordgasm #bloggersgetsocial #newblogpost #howtofindpeace #howtofindsatisfaction #attitude #howtoachievecontenment #howtobehappy #howtomeditate #affection #bookswag #bookfetish #becauseofreading #conversation #love #compassion #empathy #strong, #life #death #dream #selflove #salvation #enjoyment #admiration #listening #heart #compassion #selfcompassion #anxiety #positivity #depression #wellbeng #delightinlife #luck #loveattraction #power #successinlife
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Spend precious moments stubbornly biting your lips, speaking sternly, and acting openly… Introduction D. is above the average in height of his statue and in the firmness of his mind. A man of fixed principles and strong habits, he is intolerant of people whose words are cheaper than deeds. He was not like that in the early days of his youth. One incident, that almost ruined his happiness, forever imprinted in his heart an aversion to people deprived of true nobility of soul. Finding himself deceived, duped, and hopeless he learned to avoid provokingly mindless, heartless, and artificial specimens of humankind. A terrible bore as he is, I love him dearly. D. is a grandpa of my best friend and a grand-mentor of my humble life. He always eyes me to silence and starts preaching with so much eloquence and depth of thought that I cannot help plunging over head and ears into every discourse. 1) Why It Is Time to Let It Go D., when a sensible, handsome man of two and twenty, bore his young glory gracefully. His love was a smart, pretty girl of nineteen with merry grey eyes and lofty intelligent forehead. Anyone, seeing these two together, would say in their hearts either ‘Bless you’ or ‘Curse you’. Their love was a contagiously happy picture for kind souls and a provokingly showy - for jealous ones. His chosen one was very engaging little creature, decidedly blooming girl, although rather charming than pretty. Her eyes were full of poetry and feeling. She was a little woman, seeing with her heart rather than her head. And her faithful heart was forever given to the genuine and generous D. D. believed in dignity and depth of her soul. But the tempest of doubt and dread, of jealousy and rage almost distracted him, almost ruined their happiness. A slough scandal was spread through the whole village and finally found its way to D.’s ears. Some shallow minds believed it right away. It became a chief delight for them as these kinds of people could not hold any great ideas and were easily carried away by trivialities. D. stopped any intercourse with the poisoned humanity, the ones that readily accepted the circulating vile slander. He did his utmost to protect his little lady from learning anything about it. He himself got to the root of it only by hints and innuendoes as no one dared to speak openly with him. Read more: Regret - an Enemy that Prevents You from Being Happy: 6 Ways to Get Rid of It People tend to talk. We may like it or not – but they talk about us. It may aggravate you, but I would encourage you to relieve your mind and life from that influence. Take no notice of judgments that come from people that do not bring value to your life. Whatever they think should be considered a slight thing. It by no means should disturb the equanimity of your mind or had any injurious effect upon your appetite. Consider any offensive or simply silly statement coming out from some narrow minds as a source that facilitates your operations in improving your life, and as a motivational tool that makes you move on with your plans and ideas. Do not take any slander close to your heart and do not let anyone sly and jealous close to your life. By the way, it is better to be talked about anyways. That means people find your life amusing, interesting, and for sure a better topic to discuss than whatever their own existence presents. So, let them do what they please and continue to live as YOU please. 2) Why It Is Normal to Rip up the Ties Each time D. looked through the eyes of his chosen one and right into her heart, he saw more of the height and depth of her soul than words could speak. No wonder his spirits rose almost to madness when he discovered that his best friend was an instigator of the dreadful story of his girl being unfaithful to their love. D. didn’t believe a second that she could swear love to someone else. Never till that moment had he known the full fervor of his love, the full strength of it. Nothing could crush his faith in their shared future. The story was a lame one. Only once D. had a notion of being chained to a couch of thorns. The first night after discovering the slander, a paroxysm of anger disquieted his breathing and he bitterly reproached himself for this moment of weakness. His friend, a worthless reprobate, an impracticable fool, gave food to envenomed tongues and they started to talk about D.’s noble girl as if she was a little frivolous kitten going around and gifting her love to insipid individuals. D. cut all ties with that false friendship. Forgot the way to his house. Wiped him off his heart and soul. He brushed the dirt of this acquaintance from his memory. He knew too well to keep such people at a great distance from his life. Read more: Competition with Yourself as a Way to Success: 3 Major Reasons to Stick to It Through Thick and Thin A true friend will cry and laugh with you, not at you. The one that gives you handsome compliments in your face and talks about you with much malicious philosophy behind your back is not a friend. It is obvious. The union of friendship is a blissful gift, and when crisis finds you - true feeling stands strong against any calamity. Rejoice when you find out about some false attachment. Let this person go as far from your life as possible and wish him good-speed. This is a natural life improving, beautifying process. You multiply positivity but getting rid of negativity. 3) Why the Opinion of Others Matters D.’s heart rejoiced when his parents and his elder sister took his side in this insinuated story. Their opinion happily coincided with his own on this matter. He felt strong support and stoic faith from them. D. believed that their love and calm confidence had more effect in working his spirits up than any other factor could do. D.’s family showed him a true value of their relationship. People that sincerely wished him to be happy took pains to consider everything thoroughly. They recollected what they personally felt and knew about D.’s future wife and found not even one reason to surrender to the falsehood circulating in the village. Read more: Patience - Wise Ability to Wait: 7 Reasons to Practice This Emotionally Freeing Pow We all have a heart, and close loving people taught it to beat. They stay with you when you are in the wrong. Relationships, proved by long time and hard trials, gain strength and depth. They will listen to you and fight your enemies by your side. It is true that during the course of our life we tend to lose people. Remember though, that the ones that stay - worth hundreds of those that had left. And when you listen to those precious few, you know that whatever they say comes from honest hearts. You may follow the advice they give or adopt your own way, it would never change the sincerity of your attachment. 4) Why Take the Reins in Your Hands This occurrence served as a great lesson in D.’s life. His so-called friend, being a jealous and wicked person, tried to ruin D’s happiness. He did his utmost to bring about a fatal collapse to the true love between two faithful hearts. But every destructive effort he made was opposed by good pure feeling. D. learned that only words attached to noble deeds could purchase his affection and esteem. He always acted in accordance with his personal will and judgment and he continued to do so till his old age. Read more: How hard work on your inner self and outer self can help to find happiness in life Your intelligence is in your deeds. It stamps your life with milestones you’ve accomplished. When you make decisions according to your own judgment, you can proudly say that you are the one to be thankful for the success. And when the failure comes your way, be brave enough to take the responsibility and admit your mistakes. There should be no one to blame if you listened to yourself. Engage yourself busily in listening to dear people in your life. Their advice is precious. Consider it thoroughly, but always act upon your own chain of logic and good-natured feeling. Read more in my books Conclusion Let your life be a pleasant experience, awakened by grand people. The mention of any piece of news that concerns you should be heart-felt when coming from a loving soul, and easily forgotten when coming from a distant and nonimportant relation. Loveliness and virtue of true friendship will watch over you in good and bad. At length, by degrees life cleans itself from any false attachment, and those should be released with ease and satisfaction. Thrive and prosper under the united care of your intuitive mind and soul. Listen attentively to what you feel and act accordingly. Stay tuned… #OlyaAmanovaSAPblog #OlyaAmanovaBooks #OlyaAmanovaQuotes #StoriesAboutPeopleBlog #OlyaAmanovaSAPtalk #slanderandvilestatements #letbadpeoplego #cleanyourlife #respect #staywithpositivepeople #believeinyourself #truefriendship #falserelationship #selfrespect #selflove #love #selfcare #motivation #selfworth #loveyourself #inspiration #life #selfesteem #healing #quotes #growth #spirit #healyourself #finally #iamhealing #iamfree #spiritualgrowth #selfcare #spiritualgangsta #indiogoadult #parenting #followthemovement #motivationalquotes #lifequotes #believe #relationship #selfawareness #mindfulness #awareness #consciousness #spirituality #spiritual #freespirit #meditation #awakening #goodvibes #enlightenment #love
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“My kind of loneliness rather aggravated than relieved the gloom of my life,” said K., muttering a curse upon his chosen solitude. Introduction K. stole cautiously towards my secluded bench in the middle of my family’s little island of sunflowers in their utmost bloom and richness of color. One would be almost invisible amongst those kingly looking plants with their golden crowns and massive leaves. K.’s frank and handsome face, fringed with a fine black beard, was a trifle over-serious for his eight and twenty. He was well-nigh alien to this stunning and bewildering scene, his gloominess quite confounded the senses. I looked at him in mute and timid wonder. He never before smiled at me or said as much as a word of polite greeting, and now he was pouring on me a torrent of friendly sentiments. 1) Falling into New-Situation Loneliness When K. moved to our village he took no notice of other people and very little of me, although we were house to house neighbors and met quite often coming out and getting in our homely cottages, both thresholds facing each other. He seemed hard upon his thoughts, constantly looking down, as if examining his boots and the ground right under his feet. New-Place Loneliness by the nature of things may force a person into the embrace of solitude. The one not used to it, may feel stressed. To be locked one on one with yourself can be a challenge. The need to call into mind all the connection-making skills presents itself. And when not utilized right away, maybe forgotten completely. Shutting oneself up for a long time may create a communicative barrier, which will prevent a person from seeing an opportunity to meet people. Positive human contact - friendly affection is healing to the soul and body. Healthy spirit reigns in a healthy body and visa versa. Read more: How to preserve a healthy body and a cheerful spirit 2) When Your Personality Is Telling Its Own Different Story His isolation, so long endured, had only gained in strength by the nurtured notion of his difference from all other people that surrounded him. The intelligence that shone in his deep green eyes, when I finally had a chance to look into them while sitting on that bench, seemed scarcely of his age, or of the world. The changing expression of good humor and seriousness, his ability to blush very red to the ears made me admire a thousand lights that played about his face. K.’s IQ scored over 200 and that was a curse of his life. He saw the world in numbers and schemes rather than in colors and vibes. He perceived people as rough creatures, not fit to be his companions. I-Am-Different Loneliness is quite a mystical state of mind. It is good to be different, feel oneself unique. But there is a fine ground between feeling different and feeling superior. The first one is most often positive, rather than the other is for sure negative. To teleport oneself from negative to the positive side of uniqueness is extremely important. To achieve it you just need to open your perception to the ability to see the individuality in others. The uniqueness of personality, when multiplied, creates a wonderful cocktail of human characters. Don’t let the feeling of importance dominate your senses. Make an effort to find friends with similar views and interesting ideas, that will add peculiarity to your own personality. Read more: The Poison of Detracting Tongues or How to Live by Your Own Judgements: 4 Major ‘Why-s’ to Consider 3) The Lack of a True Felicity from Mutual Love The sweet-smelling love air stole in at his life but once when he met D., an autistic girl of nineteen with clear and pure miniature skies under the dainty arch of her eyebrows. Only in her company K. felt no need to reduce his conversation to the level of other person’s capacity as he used to do during every intercourse. She poured out more treasures of her luxurious inner nature in one minute than anyone else in his entire life could do. K. was gifted with her presence only for three summer months she spent at the seaside, and he never saw her again. Those first tokens of love were the only ardent feelings he had ever felt to the other human being in his life. K. felt that his happiness was owing to her, and without her blissful presence his existence lacked purpose. No-Soulmate Loneliness, when intimate bounds are missing, is distressing. A sweetheart is a source of love energy. Missing a romantic partner fills heart with silence that is not soothing but upsetting. Not to lose hope of finding the right person is the only cure in this case. Something partaking of the infinite would happen to you and bring variety into your life if you keep your heart from getting arid. Read more: How to find a soulmate, a truly loving person you deserve 4) Pitching Life to Exhausting Key and Leaving No Space for Oneself It was not wonderful that K. should wish to stay alone, still trembling with vibrations of love. He grew even more abstracted and tried to busy himself diving in his newly formed plan of moving to the village and burring his over-drained mind in simple farm occupations, that required no thinking process but just hard-working hands. No-Time-for-Connection Loneliness is misleading. To throw oneself into daily occupations not leaving any space for yourself and for others is a big mistake. That time may be considered lost, because you may accomplish some goals and fulfill some plans, but if you forget about the food for your soul on the way – you condemn yourself to the whirred, monotonous, and tiresome as a clock life. There will be no one to share the pleasures of your achievements. And happiness, when unshared, is not happiness anymore. It loses the charm and sweetness, that it could otherwise add to your life. 5) Being Not Disposed to Trust and Accept Friendship K. felt confused, his past mingling in his mind and his present being uncertain. Vague doubtful thoughts hummed like the wings of a bee each time he met a new person. He was ill-disposed to make friends, not trusting anybody and suspecting everybody. He was sure people were not honest when expressing their welcoming attitude. He used to have the vastness of numbers to lose himself in, now he tried to be forgotten in voices of lying and faces of hidden shun that he forced himself to see around. Lack-of-Trust Loneliness is a pessimistic approach to life. If you do not believe in existing of truly well-intentioned, kind, and helpful people – you do not believe in life itself. Trust is an integral element of any valuable relationship. The ability to distinguish frank faces among the worldly masks which may hide danger is essential. You should peer intrusively into the crowd with a strong faith in divine human nature – and then you will see the brightness of the smile and the beaming of the soul in the eyes of people that you can trust. Read more: Competition with Yourself as a Way to Success: 3 Major Reasons to Stick to It Through Thick and Thin 6) Walls Filled with Silence of Missing Presence When at home K. felt his words thrown out, conversations started and no one to address them to. He loved to watch debates on various intellectual topics and used to defend himself tragically in an empty room in front of an imaginary opponent. His clever remarks dashed in vain against empty walls. Quiet-Presence Loneliness is the lack of companionable silence. Sometimes we need someone to be just there for us, present in the room but not intrusive into our thoughts. The knowledge that we are not alone adds a comforting element to our life. Sometimes a domestic pet may serve as a quiet companion. It is always pleasant to enter into a habitable place after the day’s strain and excitement, rather than to find no eyes to look into during dusk hours. Getting Hard upon Distractive Loneliness Food didn’t supply K. with necessary energy anymore. He ate and drank but it didn’t put any heart in him. He couldn’t sleep, the night was fast closing not gifting him with rejuvenating rest. He carried himself with the air of a weary man, feeling the claws of depression pressing harder on his chest. He had no tools to cope with stress, life attractions seemed to be hidden from his eyes. K. found it harder with each day to approach people. 1) Making an Effort to Connect with People K. fervently hoped to find the way to add to his life some peaceful delight. To find a middle ground: so that he could feel soft tranquility of mind amongst people and have pleasant moments of solitude every now and then. One day, the evening was slowly coming on, bringing an intense need to talk to somebody. And I happened to come across his now over-watchful eye. After our prolonged conversation K. agreed to make it customary to meet in the same place at least a couple times a week. By-the-by cheerful serenity started to prevail among our mute and voiced conversations. Stay open for others. Connect with people. Nurture relationships. And by degrees you will be able to cultivate trustworthy, noble, heartfelt friends. We need to feel that we belong, to confide, to be able to give and get support. So, make an effort to secure the favor of warm-hearted people and your life won’t stay in need of love and contentment. Read more: How a soul-felt comforting conversation can help to heal a broken heart 2) Expressing Amiable Generosity towards Others When K. let his heart be open to the truest, warmest, soul-felt gratitude – he started to see more smiling faces around. The reason was simple - the charming smile found its way to his face, and even though he had forgotten how to wear it, his gentle nature was always ready to master every positive skill all over again. K. learned to share the devotion and affection of his nature so long locked and sealed inside his soul. This transformation brought deep and lasting relationships with other people. Friendship, that before these days seemed impossible, crept in his life accompanied by blithesome music of kind hearts. That music taught K. to value the treasures of the heart over any possessions of the intellect. He stopped feeling superior to others, admitting that he had tons to learn from simple people with little to boast of in terms of monetary luxuries, and so much in terms of joyousness of life. Give love and you will receive it back multiplied. Be generous, wrap your beloved people up in attention and affection. Your life will be full of light of unmingled happiness, if you cherish faith in the best in people. And a divine reflection falling from it will be a source of inspiration for others. 3) Asking Yourself the Right Questions K.’s heart was firmly set on never to return to the sorrow and calamity of his past distractive life apprehensions. He claimed his share of happiness by the way of asking himself what was missing in his life. He was intended to not let his positive spirit tarnish. His super powerful brain found the perfect formula for happiness, and the key element in it was a strong connection to other people. In order to find the very thing that prevents you from being happy, you need to constantly ask what is missing in your life. We are everything we think, everything we say, everything we believe, and we encounter on our way what we deserve and expect. Learn to ask questions. We have two ears and one mouth – an obvious sign that we need to listen twice as much as we talk. Be attentive to what your inner nature is saying to you. This way you will be able to fill in all empty places in your life. Read more in my books Conclusion It is vital to know the difference between loneliness that feels draining, distractive, and upsetting; and desired solitude that is peaceful, creative, and restorative. There is something absolute about true companionship: love, trust, support, help – we can see and touch it. When you come to understand that happiness is possible only when a strong connection is present, then you can claim to find a fulcrum in life. Stay tuned... #OlyaAmanovaSAPblog #OlyaAmanovaBooks #OlyaAmanovaQuotes #StoriesAboutPeopleBlog #OlyaAmanovaSAPtalk #loneliness #blogger #typesofloneliness #howtodealwithloneliness #lonely #writer #powerofpositivethinking #theloneliness #confront #howtoconfront #selfhelp #3waystoconfrontit #howtofight #positive #positivity #positivethinking #thinkpositive #ebook #positiveattitude #author #selfhelpebooks #blogoftheyear #2019blog #bestselfhelpblog
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"Understanding, that worrying was draining and unreasonable arrives in course of time,” said U. sitting himself with the air of a stranger. Introduction And U. was not a stranger in our house. Today he was very polite, as frightened men frequently are. We both, I and my mom, were visited with the same unpleasant sensation at that moment – worry, like the rippling of water in a silent place, glimmered faintly in his pale blue eyes. U.’s eyes were sharp, noticing everything, skipping nothing. A round face, shiny black hair, and old fashioned half-whiskers. A friend to our house, a brother to my mom, a confidante to me. He was quick at understanding the teenagers who spoke their own language of youth, and the most reticent and distrustful of them would tell him their story without realizing they were doing so. But his own daughters seemed to get more and more distant and solemn with him. 1) Make a Whole Understanding of Your ‘Why’ U. had two twin-teenage daughters whom he raised without mother, she died when they were only three years old. N. and M. were as different in their inner nature as they were alike in their outer looks. N. was rather more complex than M. She was fanciful with all sorts of unspoken preferences and was easily offended, her velvety green eyes filled with tears at every trifling misfortune. M., on the contrary, at almost any disappointment or displeasure would lift her chin and bear it silently. Both of them at their 16 now were getting even with the life of love-adventure. That was the major reason for sleepless nights and days full of anxiety for their father. Figure out ‘why’ you worry so much. Intently look at the true reasons for your worry. It may be a slight thing that disturbs your equanimity or a major distractive force that frails your mind – in any case, you need to form a clear understanding of what you are dealing with. Read more: How to Find Contentment in Life: 5 Life-Changing Things You Need to Know 2) Piece Your Worry Out U. was quick to anger, quick to laughter, and kind and loving from the depth of his soul. His daughters used to confide in him with every life adventure. But now they were growing into little ladies and needed a woman’s... mother’s guidance. He felt the need for a gentle touch in their upbringing all the way during his faithful-to-his-dear-wife life. The same sudden recognition flashed into his mind more and more often now. U. noticed that with him his daughters would restrain their speech and manners out of some secretive modesty. They hated the superior tone that he sometimes took with them, trying to reason and caution. Turn the power of reason on. The wealth of your mind should piece out every worrisome thing in your life and make a full list of what you need to confront. Analyze the list. This intelligence is refreshing. It gives you an ability to look at the things that disturb you so in a more distant and broad way. Read more: The Poison of Detracting Tongues or How to Live by Your Own Judgements: 4 Major ‘Why-s’ to Consider 3) Embrace Uncertainty His daughters resented U.’s protecting manner. Now they had only their girlish fanciful minds to batter at the world with. He consoled himself with the belief that he had managed to instill in them the endurance to go through life trials, but he feared that their open-to-love hearts may get bruised on the way to more mature understanding of relationships. N. and M. were tossed down blindfold on that life of emotion. To predict what it would make of them was impossible. The vital essence, the throb of it, the light restlessness – rising suddenly, sinking suddenly, impulsive and playful – they needed to taste it with their own taste buds. Accept the uncertainty fulcrum. Everything in life comes in perfect time. We need to admit it and welcome every change and challenge rather than feel dread and fear. We grow and become stronger sometimes with the help of things we can explain, and very often with things we are not able to comprehend at all. And to predict which of them would become a happy or a sad coincidence is impossible – and that, exactly that makes life so interesting. Read more: How to Be Happy When Entwined in a Disabled Body: 6 Positive Ways to Perceive Reality 4) Become Handy with Distractive Tools U. was walking slowly, dragging his feet along as if he had a great weight on his shoulders. His daughters were the only salvation for him. He needed to divert his thoughts to something completely different, something that could rose the old man from the torpor of worry in which he seemed to live now. My mother was a wise woman and a good friend to her older brother. She reasoned with him, instilling in his mind the understanding that every step his daughters took toward love added to them strength and expansion as individuals. My mother said that there was no purpose in tossing the days in a sort of monotonous agitation as there was no way to stop the natural process of girls’ awakening sensuousness. She had me and my sister to think about and she chose to trust and respect rather than worry and question our self-esteem. Change the way you relate to worry and anxiety. Make every effort possible to add meaning and pleasure to your life. Fill your free time with the activities you enjoy the most. Read interesting books and watch fascinating movies, listen to nice music and enjoy your most admirable hobby. Distract your mind from the thoughts that make you feel uncomfortable. 5) Consider Overestimation that Resides in Every Worry U. needed to call back to his memory the days of his early youth, the recollections of first love when there was not a particle of earth beneath his feet, the resentment at the face of any amount of reason that his parents were trying to thrash into him. He could make his authority felt and lock his girls at home, not letting them wonder with their friends after school – that would only invite violence and protest – U. knew it too well. His daughters were merging into their teens. Soon enough they would be grown young women and to get to this point they needed to acquire experience that only heartfelt affairs could give. Remember that it is never as bad as you may think it to be. Often, we have a tendency to overexaggerate things. And when looked upon more closely it appears not as bad at all. We are not properly suited to judge things in our lives. A misfortune may happen to be a happy coincidence and we may not recognize it at the time. In any case, we need to make mistakes to be able to apprehend the deeper undercurrents of life – this way we grow and thrive. Read more: The Catechism of Book Therapy or How You Can Self-Cure with a Good Book 6) Say a Lot to the Purpose I was on friendly terms with M. and N. Sitting together, exchanging occasional words, glances and smiles, we indicated a certain advanced stage of intimacy and camaraderie. That friendship produced a consoling effect on U.’s worrisome mind. His girls spent a lot of time in our house, talking to me, my sister, and our mother. That was not the same as having their own loving and caring mother beside, but that still gave them an example of a mother-daughter relationship. They could ask my mother questions that were not destined to man’s ears. The answers they received were full of dignity and depth of graceful and noble judgment. U. also had a privilege to relieve his long-pent emotions and talk freely with my mother, his younger sister. She was able to balance the strange anxiety in his soul, solace his spirit, and soothe his ruffled temper with the company and conversation. To talk about the things that bother you with someone you trust is the best way to come closer to understanding them better. Voiced, they lose some degree of frightening power over you. A feeling that you shared your worry with a beloved person consoles your heart and diminishes the weight of anxiety that holds your soul a prisoner. Talk about it, let your fear come out – it may dispel in the air or at least reduce in size. Read more in my books Conclusion The time of agitated, burning heart and brain is left behind. U. is an affectionate grandfather to his many grandchildren. His beautiful and wise daughter M. is an ornament of true motherly love and daughterly devotion to the whole village. She came back from a big town with a child in her hands seeking retirement for her broken heart. An icy hand released her soul when she met a simple farmer, married him, and became a mother for four brothers to her little older girl. U.’s other daughter N. became a famous writer - married to her books; constantly in love with her cats, niece, and nephews; and caring about every relation on a distant gift-giving manner. She remembers all the important dates and never fails to send a word and a present but rarely shows up herself, always faithful to her secluded way of life. Figure out ‘why’ you worry too much. Make a list of things that trouble you and think them over. Talk to a friend and analyze your list through thoughtful conversation. Very often when your worry is brought to the light of day it appears not as fearsome and disappears, not able to withstand the amount of reason you thrash on it. Exercise daily to make your body stronger, it will add flexibility not only to your limbs but to your mind as well. Learn to divert your thoughts from the worrisome ideas that may possess you. Drink less caffeine to minimize some tension on your nerves, get a soothing and calming herbal tea instead. Meditate and learn to see the beauty and charm in life around, relax your body and soul. Never blame yourself. Be loving and caring towards your feelings. There is a solution to every problem. Get help from other people: your family, and friends - bring your worry to an end together. Stay tuned... #OlyaAmanovaSAPblog #OlyaAmanovaBooks #OlyaAmanovaQuotes #StoriesAboutPeopleBlog #OlyaAmanovaSAPtalk #worry #anxiety #blogger #topblogger #blogging #anxietandworry #stopworrying #worryhabbit #takecontrolofyourworry #howtostopworrying #dontworry #mediatationforanxiety #anxietyhelp #anxietyrelief #anxietycure #ebook #selfhelpebook
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“I was armed at all points. It was a pleasure to be so completely equipped for the life battle with my gratitude weapons being polished steel.” Introduction T. was a generous spirit. He had all the illumination of wisdom and yet he was distressfully dying. There seemed to be a happy symmetry in this unhappy depiction of his life. I was touched with wonder at the depths of perception of which this person was capable. His unselfish belief in the idea that gratitude is a way to make the most of life was something I could set up, and bow down before, and offer a sacrifice to… T. had a taint of death, a flavor of mortality in him – which is exactly what I needed to shake my world to the bottom and have a chance to find myself in the thrashed around pieces of it. I hung on every syllable he uttered in his diary, and received, as oracles, all he wrote. With gratitude your mind is never cold. It enjoys the pleasure of sincere appreciation of what you have. The positivity behind this feeling is always present. It gives food for pleasurable emotions and brakes the monotony of life. You become intolerable to negative thoughts, odious to your soul, they are smashed by every supreme moment of complete kindness and compassion. In a grateful state you live as thirsty men drink – sleep with spirit, eat with joy, communicate with virtue, and, to crown the whole, your health becomes void of all those sicknesses that originate from harmful emotions. They have no power over you, your cheerful temper and uplifted spirit keep your bodily health unstained. 1) Gratitude Is a Way to a Far-Reaching and Infinite Happiness “Of parents extremely poor and extremely honest it was next to impossible that I could paint my life other than in grateful colors. Our family seemed to be possessed with a kind of intellectual gaiety at the times of the most troublesome hardships. We were able to starve any thoughts of misery and lack of appreciation entirely away by just a mere force of heartfelt love to each other and to the life itself.” “I often was bruised and felt scant of breath but never ungrateful. Every misfortune walked me away from despair and gave me the key to patience. I was a sick-nurse to my father (my mother died when I was 28 and my father and I never fully recovered after that loss). I was seriously out of health. I caught a violent cold right after the saddest day of our life, which fixed itself on my lungs and threw them into dire confusion.” No day can go without a speck of some misfortune. However, if you spend at least a moment a day recollecting it with humor and praise with gratitude the opportunity to learn from it – it becomes impossible to let uneasy thoughts hunt you for long. Be ready to undertake 5 minutes each morning portraying yourself reading a poem about a coming day, composing a piece of wonderful music that will accompany you throughout it, or drawing a beautiful picture that will depict a culminating point of it. While doing it, keep in mind that the principal business of life is to enjoy it. Every now and then put your thin forefinger on your lips and remind yourself of many blessings in your life that you are sincerely thankful for. Kiss it with a smile on your lips and imagine embracing yourself tenderly. This mode of actions will set every nerve in your body quivering with happy vibes. Read more: How to Find Contentment in Life: 5 Life-Changing Things You Need to Know 2) Gratitude Makes You Light and Incapable of Stupidity “I had good winters and poor winters. I basked in the sun and went to bed when it rained. And I never forgot to spend a few moments a day reflecting the things in my life I was blessed with.” “I was always so odd a mixture of quick parts, sarcastic humor, reserve, and caprice that the experience of knowing me for a short while had been insufficient to satisfy my acquaintances, and those people lingered about me longer to build friendly ties with me stronger. This way I had a daily meeting with someone to be thankful for, an old friend reminding of himself to be grateful for, and a promise of a future pleasant contact to be longing for…” There is more in the bond with other people in your life that you can put a name to. The real fact is that the knowledge of being respected and loved raises a presumption against unhealthy relationships. It is as if you put a protecting charm on the arm you use to stretch to shake hands with other people. If you train yourself to care only for truth and kindness, and believing that two intelligent and friendly people ought to look for healthy relationships together, you will feel great desire to be social, to share your grateful spirit with others. Read more: ‘Draculas’ of Today - Energy Vampires: 8 Types of Vampires and 4 Major Life-Survival Strategies 3) Gratitude Drains the Cup of Health to Your Benefit “I was determined to live longer although the doctors professed the limit till just two-and-thirty. Imputing it to nothing but grateful feelings, which for ought I knew, prolonged my life extremely, I was able to make it to these days, waaay past forty.” “When I was in pain I more often smiled than scowled. That was the foundation of my beauty despite of my many limitations. I had love enough but not too much, I had loss a lot but not unbearable. Had I lived my life again in every detail of desire, temptation, pain and surrender I would have chosen the exact life I lived to the very aspect of sickness and every element of loss.” You are armed at all points if you equip yourself with grateful thoughts. Gratitude makes you remarkably fresh from good night’s sleep, more agile from desire to exercise your increased energy, and overall much healthier. Every day is a blank page, a pure white surface and you are the only one able to paint it successfully in bright colors. Use art and guile, talent and temper recognizing friendship, avoiding a mistake and taking care of the state of your body and mind. Do not let yourself to be easily crushed by negativity. Evoke a multitude of grateful pictures in your mind and thirstily drain the cup of a happy and healthy life. Read more: A Path that Leads to Profound Existence in Peace with Yourself 4) Gratitude Brakes the Monotony of Your Daily Life and Boosts Your Career “My business affairs never were a dull round of searching a way to follow money, but a charming mode of meeting my expectations. I had a right mixture of the detached and the involved when doing a job, which made every day in the office a splendid harmony of classic, calculated activity of the mind, and graceful, whining movement of the body.” “Gratitude gave me that easy confidence of manner. Always quite up to everything, I was a sort of person you could depend on, and that made me splendidly respectable by my partners and coworkers.” It is a useless and sacrilegious thing to be bored when alive. A wretched time is over as soon as you surround yourself with grateful thoughts. To be under the sway of appreciation means to be in rapport with yourself and the people around you. This blissful state of mind opens opportunities for favorable business relationships and you should be not slow to embrace it. To build a successful career is to cut clean out of your life scorching pessimistic thinking. Do not let anyone or anything to throw you off an equilibrium which gratitude creates. Networking is gaining in strength by the contented approach. Above all, decision making, improves more from good-humor than from gloomy concentration. Gratitude, when truly genuine, makes you eager to listen, and this skill is essential for managing people and organizations. Read more: The Poison of Detracting Tongues or How to Live by Your Own Judgements: 4 Major ‘Why-s’ to Consider 5) Gratitude Feeds You by a Spring of Inexhaustible Positive Emotions “I took no notice of negative people and very little of pessimistic acquaintances. The wealth of positive emotion awakened pleasure and added loveliness and virtue to my life. My heart being overcharged with grateful feelings, made me exposed to the goodness of the world around me. I was able to describe delight, peace of mind, and soft tranquility on paper, voice it to my friends, charge with it my family, and radiate it to the objects, and atmosphere around.” You well know how to employ your good feelings to become more relaxed, resilient and overall happier if you make a habit to answer a question: “What am I thankful for?” Wrap yourself in happy memories, grateful emotions, and generous hopes. An open-hearted life is a possible perfection and must be treated with passion and love. Clear, bright, radiant emotional state certainly depends on what you feel toward yourself and others. The actual amount of pleasure you receive from life is exactly proportional to the expanse of compassion and gratitude in the air you are breathing in. Read more: Competition with Yourself as a Way to Success: 3 Major Reasons to Stick to It Through Thick and Thin 6) Gratitude Resides in Glad and Flourishing Personalities “The fervency of my personality trembled from sunlight and fragrance. Gratitude created a barrier that was guarding me against cold and cheerless. Like any freezing temperature those kinds of feelings could preserve but never let life to be developed. Any progress was stopped when in an atmosphere of a pessimistic refrigerator.” “I looked on nature and my fellow-men and didn’t see the dark and gloomy. The cheerful colors prevailed and those were reflections from my own grateful eyes. A clear vision was developed in the balmy atmosphere of positive vibrations. My mind rambled at its pleasure and every valuable information was deeply curved in it. My personality flourished with every grateful feeling and every glad emotion.” Gratitude is not merely a part of personality, that appears in the background. It stands at the front of a line. Increased self-esteem and dignity are the proceeds of this transformation process that gratitude sets in motion. Gratitude is the first warm ray of sunshine that, as the story tells us, makes the traveler throw the cloak from his shoulders, when the storm, blows as it will, cannot tear it from him. You do not cringe away from the winds of life. Being ready to show appreciation to every obstacle on your way, you supplement them by profitable lessons that make you even stronger. It does you a good turn when you appear less materialistic, self-centered and more optimistic, and spiritual. Gratitude makes this change possible. It compels you to achieve your goals without any anguish of uncertainty because success does not matter as much as the opportunity to test yourself. Read more: Patience - Wise Ability to Wait: 7 Reasons to Practice This Emotionally Freeing Power Read more in my books Conclusion T. died at forty-eight. When I saw him last, he evidently found great difficulty speaking. He waited long to collect himself, and then he murmured simply: “Take this,” and he handed me his diary. That book had a voice that dropped deep into my soul. The last page contained a message: “Pain passes, but love remains. We suffer so much sometimes. I’m very old when I think about it, but I grow young again when I believe in generous mistakes that hurt, happy tears that burn, and deep adoration that squeezes the heart till every drop of love is revealed. And the only way to see the beauty in life is to be able to open your eyes every morning with extraordinary grateful gladness. Only this feeling will make you beyond the reach of pain.” Take a fancy to writing exclamations of gratitude in a journal. Grab after every opportunity to express your thankfulness and try to make the moment of appreciation fresh. Your fortune of life blessings is enormous, and you spend it entirely in doing good if you remind yourself about it and keep noticing new things to acknowledge and new people to respect. Let gratitude to excel every other quality. It would be a relief to cherish people over material things. If you recognize the need to build a habit of practicing appreciation it will have an exhilarating effect on your nervous system. You will feel calmness and composure in difficult situations when dealing with people, philosophic equanimity facing cataclysms of nature far beyond all human power, and happy in your own quiet way when giving love and returning kindness. Stay tuned… #OlyaAmanovaSAPblog #OlyaAmanovaBooks #OlyaAmanovaQuotes #StoriesAboutPeopleBlog #OlyaAmanovaSAPtalk #happiness #followmyblog #contentment #howtofindcontentment #love #gh #quote #compassion #peace #blogger #blog #ontheblog #IndieAuthors #writerblock #writersnetwork #amwriting #amediting #howtolive #familylife #wordgasm #bloggersgetsocial #newblogpost #howtofindpeace #howtofindsatisfaction #attitude #howtoachievecontenment #howtobehappy #howtomeditate #affection #bookswag #bookfetish #becauseofreading #conversation #love #compassion #empathy #strong, #life #death #dream #selflove #salvation #enjoyment #admiration #listening #heart #appreciation #thankfulness #positivity #laughter #regret #gratitude
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If you are exposed to attention of millions – they are exposed to your influence. Introduction His ability to write and voice what he thought was as well-kept as his perfect mustache. He was a true modern incarnation of my beloved Poirot and had the same initials. By the butterfly’s wing of his white necktie, P. could charm any woman and make every man jealous of his looks and manner. I stopped talking and, putting on an observant air, pricked my ears in evident delight. The lecture began with an opening statement on our honored guest’s background: a short summary of his accomplishments and a brief enumeration of his published works. P. lived for years in depressive intoxication: he was dismissed from work, lost his house, his wife left him, and he ended up living in the streets for three consecutive years after that. With superhuman effort he evoked himself from this slumber: found a job, a room to live, a phone to call old friends and family. P. carried the burden of his misery and cruel memories wisely. He portrayed his journey of recovery in his social media accounts and speeches that he gave throughout the country. The support P. received gave him courage enough to write his first book: “FROM A BEGGAR TO AN INFLUENCER.” He skillfully depicted the sincerity of his renewed self-belief, -worth, and -respect. P. pronounced the word of truth, the word of gratification and excuse in his most honored books. He had sadness and shadow in his life and managed to transform it into joy and light and, which is fascinating, to inspire others to do the same. I turned on the recording function on my phone, entrusting to it to capture not only meaning but also the vibration of P.’s charismatic baritone and the elevating vibe of his emotions. 1) An Invocation to the Sacred Collective Intelligence “A few years ago, I was a little worse than nobody and only the wealth of feeling and imagination kept me going. I did my best to put as many external-change-miles between myself and that past self that resembled a lizard person: fat, distressed, and overall unhappy street beggar.” “When the visible transformation that I depicted in my social media accounts afforded a strong confirmatory evidence of my will power I noticed a considerable follower increase that continued to be so till the dark day in July of 2017.” Social media is like an invocation to the sacred collective intelligence of the audience. The effort you are making to draw attention, to Go Viral, Create Memes (a discovery that is shared so widely that it becomes a part of internet culture) becomes a luminous point in the coming days of your life. The magic in social media comes with excited, placid, deep, and limpid emotions shared, spread across social media realms. It is a superhuman vision that media evokes. It is heightened by valued people, trendsetters and their ability to network. They spread messages and those are never in repose after that but forever in flight and their course is insatiable. The success in this internet universe is determined by the ability to penetrate the silence of the eyes, the voices in the heads, and the vibrations in the hearts of humanity in your niche. If you are able to see into the inside of your people: the misery they suffer, the happiness they crave, the thoughts that grow out of their experiences, the infinite emotions that lay hidden in their hearts – then the glory of having created the solution, redeeming the suffering, showing the new world of ideas and distractions will put you in a sort of ecstasy. The feeling of affectionate attention that social media can give is the opium of modern world that can either stop the tempest of doubt and dread, of jealousy and rage that people feel or increase the intensity of those harmful feelings to the unbearable degree. Read more: Social Media Influencers Propelled a Brilliant Future: 5 Steps Toward Success & Internet Freedom 2) An Electric Current that Goes Through the Hearts and Minds of People “The flow of traffic accompanied by the feeling of power and monetary satisfaction was an engine that propelled my activity and at the same time throttled my ability to reflect and empathize. People started to ask my expert opinion and I was delighted at the opportunity to dominate, preach and teach.” “Those in distress found it motivating and uplifting to follow my story. I managed to create a balance and unity of thoughts and feelings through my speeches on the stage and in my videos. I painstakingly pieced my life in a few hours and elated people by my example.” “A few followers sent me pleading for help letters. They needed more attention and encouragement. I became too arrogantly busy to spend enough time to do so. By a remarkable coincidence, those few incidents of my negligence skipped calling publicity (no one complained). So, the ruin of my social media career was not due to my silence but on the contrary – thanks to the too-loud-opinions that I’d expressed.” Social media is an electric current that goes through the hearts and minds of people. The perfect sculpture of this system of sharing contains words, ideas, pictures, videos, and audios. Face to face, emotion to emotion, wound to wound – this world has a childish soul and a limited mind behind the vastness of information. Without wise guidance life within it is saddened and future is black. Making first steps in social media world, make sure you have a mentor to help you navigate your way. It will save you a lot of time and energy. Sheltered from harmful influence, protected for a time against the fearful spells of over dense information one can mature and add great knowledge and exclusiveness to his life with the help of social media. Now you can find what you need in seconds without spending hours in the library turning pages after pages. The resources available are numerous and categorized for you by reviews of many people. It is a fine modern privilege to be able to skillfully direct the route in social media realms. And without knowing how to do it any life in there is short-lived and weak. Read more: Competition with Yourself as a Way to Success: 3 Major Reasons to Stick to It Through Thick and Thin 3) A Fearful Spell of Judgments “The social air grew colder as my vanity expressed itself louder. And when the mist of my unfavorable twitts rolled along the world like a dense cloud of smoke, the decline of my reputation was not possible to stop.” “I was busily engaged in judging and criticizing the ways of life that considerably differed from the one I was living at the moment. I forgot that only a few years prior I was a complete contradictory person to what I represented at the time. With much ceremony and stateliness, I voiced verdicts like: ‘I do not understand how one can live like that’, ‘I cannot respect a person acting in this way’, ‘how one can live in such a body’… and many more of a similar kind.” “Finally, the tragedy was entered into my life with the full force and distractive power. The strength of public protest crashed the respect that I earned in the eyes of the outer world and my own self-worth suffered immensely. For the second time in my life, I was ruined mentally, morally, and physically. And if the first time circumstances and out-of-my-control factors were to blame, this time I was the only one responsible.” When you express yourself online you are not protected against a fearful spell of judgments of others. That is the reason to be thoughtful in your actions and words. Internet is selfish and to keep it serving for good one needs to be wise in using its powerful tools of spreading the information. Successful people, influencers, use admirable art of words and gestures, contagious images and piquant, unique ideas, ingenious salutations – and all of it to invest in their future. The more engaging content they put out to the world of social media the more they get back in terms of attention and affiliate advertising opportunities. Read more: The Poison of Detracting Tongues or How to Live by Your Own Judgements: 4 Major ‘Why-s’ to Consider 4) A Positive Distraction or a Depressing Factor “I seated myself opposite the people I was trying to help. My first intention was forgotten in the confusion of attention and praise that I was luxuriously thrusting myself into. Anger and annoyance at what I expressed publicly was a just confirmation of my moral decline.” “I used to be close to these people when I was one of them: working hard, feeling tired and depressed sometimes but with an effort lifting my head and doing what was right. I was able to break the chain of negative behavior, emotions, and feelings. I prided myself with this accomplishment. People were empowered by my example and generosity of my statements.” The influence of positive message that is spread out through social networks can succeed in producing irresistible effect on our life. It may motivate one to improve his life overall or to better some aspects of it that require more effort and attention. At the same time, there are a lot of damaging oddities that may attract the audience and create a collective desire for negative behavior. That mostly touches kids and teenagers, but some insecure grown-up people are a target as well. To prevent it, parents need to create their own system of censorship. Guidance when making the first steps in learning how to use the world of information is required in school with books and in life with internet. A life we live every day is diverse and enveloped in good and bad, jolly and sad, interesting and boring. Often the latter prevails, but what we see online is not the reality we usually live offline. The idealized picture may serve as a distraction that betters our life or as a depressing factor. And the feedback our emotions receive depends on the self-esteem we feel. Fear and lack of self-worth create pessimistic interaction between our life and the lives that other people expose to our attention online. 5) Unlimited and Unrestrained Debates “When I forgot my past self, I took the transformation that I’d managed to make as purely my own doing. I easily threw away the encouragement that I’d received on the way to my new body and mind, forgetting the impact my followers made. They rightly broke off the ties and left not only reproachful comments but, what is more painful, a memory of love turned into hate, respect transformed into contempt, and admiration altered by disgust.” Debates online are fueled by unlimited attention and participation. People engage in discussions and say a lot to the purpose and absolutely out of it, which makes it unrestrained. Some people act under a firm conviction that their opinion is always right. Criticism is uncontrolled and any tenderness to the feelings is often nonexistent. If you decide to share part of your life online, consider that and be warned and armed to address it in the right way. 6) A Way to Maintain a Stronger Connection “To build connection is a tenacious and time-consuming work. To maintain it is just as hard. But to ruin everything you do not need to make any effort at all. One publicly shared unfavorable statement of yours can crash years of tough movement to the desired.” “I felt support and love gushing from the hearts of people that liked what I was doing. I felt the lack of it the more painful for it. Who has lived in the light of attention cannot feel contented in the uncrowded space of lonely life without it.” “I hastened to repair my life by self-reflecting and writing all my feelings and thoughts down. When I published my second book “BUILD CONNECTION WITH RESPECT IN SOCIAL MEDIA WORLD” I didn’t anticipate the impact that this work would do.” “One of the main things that defer humankind from any other creature on this Earth is the ability to forgive. My book helped me to be forgiven because I was sincerely sorry for what I’ve said and the way I acted.” Read more: How to Get Worry and Anxiety Out of Your Life: 6 Steps to End Chronic Worrying With social media it is easier to be loved and courted by distant relations. But if you say and show too much, you may appear somewhat self-opinionated - people do not like it. If one touches upon the lives of others over any limit, it shows that he or she is a narrow-minded, tattling old gossip - people hate it. The greatest installment to the debt of sincere affection is truth and genuineness. When you share your happiness, you connect with other people on a level of positive vibes, and by doing this, you multiply the bliss in your life. The impact you have on your social network should serve to solace spirits and soothe tempers. If your company is pleasing and online conversation is genuine people come back to your platform and bring friends along. Becoming a soul of authentic order online is very important for keeping a true and strong connection with people. Fresh news or old scandal, trivial questions or oft-repeated observations – when online it is spread across the minds with the speed that beats the light one. Be careful of what you share and remember that when you are radiant with dignity and depth of soul your charm is keenly spiritual and has an ineffable power to attract and subjugate the hearts. Read more: Distractive Loneliness and Positive Solitude: 6 Kinds of Loneliness and 3 Ways to Confront It 7) An Advertising Dreamland “Covering my face with my hands I sank into a new life of renewed self-awareness. I was suffused with a crimson flush. It was not from the shame but from the pleasant feeling of regained self-esteem. This mistake taught me my duty and served as an advertisement for my work. The sad remembrance of my failure helped me to be more sincere and open to the people who addressed me online and off-line.” “This experience of sinking lower and lower cast over my writing those brilliant hints and expressions that touched the hearts of people. MY heart was set on a right track to impress and uplift, to inspire and motivate.” Advertising glows with redoubled fires kindled by social networking, microblogging, photo sharing, and video sharing. One can take a wiser part of using Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Pinterest, and LinkedIn to market everything from an idea that you cannot touch to a product that you can hold. Slowly, using content marketing or more quickly through influencer marketing one can achieve results with persistent and constant effort. To set up an advertising campaign nowadays you do not need to hire a whole bunch of experts. One smart person can be enough, or you can do it even by yourself. When people grow fond of your content, you realize with some unaccountable satisfaction that they will buy what you have to offer. It does not free you of responsibility to maintain your reputation valued by always offering quality products. If your blog is loved, make your book shine with more excessive excellence of information. If you look so lovely that people cannot help admiring your charming outfits, make sure the clothing and accessories you recommend worth the price people are ready to pay for them. 8) A Limited Personality Perception “The third book I published “THINGS YOU DO NOT KNOW” was about friends and kindred, close and distant connections, valuable and reserved network, people of the world and out of it – and how to use the things you do not know to build relationships.” “The ‘secret’ I shared was a universal axiom, known to everybody and neglected by many – to live by ‘not-judging’ because of ‘not-knowing’. It became a sensation overnight. The quotes from it were flying through the media with the speed of light: “If you do not understand that I am a man like every other man, you take me for what you are afraid in yourself... You do not need to know me if you are not going to judge me... If you intend to rank me in your system of values, take pains to perceive me thoroughly...” “And let me tell you that to get to ‘perceive thoroughly’ anybody is a rare skill not everybody has. We seldom know ‘good enough’ ourselves to claim to be experts in forming opinions about other people.” Knowledge is illuminating. To establish contact with anybody the presence of it is essential. For meaningful conversation, one needs to listen and ask questions and the other to take the verbal part of colloquy. We receive information, form opinion. The more information we have, the better we can understand each other. In the internet society we often miss the expression of the face and the attitude of the body – an essential part of the information needed for making a clear picture of any person. Our perception is a tenuous membrane that is too rudely buffeted by the stressors from outside and emotions from inside. Everything happens too quickly, and we learn to run with time and information. Often, we mechanically put labels on things around us: ‘useful’ and ‘unimportant’, ‘true’ and ‘false’, ‘positive’ and ‘negative’. This mode of action helps us to keep our minds sane in the whirling world we live in. But no one can be justly proud of using the same method with people. Personality is not an easy book to read overnight and write a short review in two hours in the morrow. Every person is a universe in itself, complicated, with undiscovered phenomena on every corner. Family, close relations, distant connections, society, things around, climate outside, and numerous other factors play their role in personality formation. Without a thorough knowledge of all these criteria how one can justly say ‘I know you’ or ‘if I were you I would do this or that’? How can you solve a mathematical problem with limited information given? The answer won’t be right. And to my mind, it is better to restrain from being in the obvious wrong by judging too rashly. When it comes to people and relationships one needs to pause and contemplate before acting in any way. When it comes to social media behavior I would say: express yourself as freely as you feel comfortable doing and detain your conclusions about other people as long as you can. The world is small when it comes to emotions. To cause pain is as easy these days as to type one or two sentences in your ‘compose new Tweet’ box. Read more: The Catechism of Book Therapy or How You Can Self-Cure with a Good Book 9) A Dangerous Ground for Conflict “In my fourth book “WHEN MY GRANDIOUR SLIPPED AWAY” I was eager and ashamed to tell the story of my failure in light of my obtained vastness of understanding myself. I slightly kicked upon the prostrated form of my past-self with responsibility in my mind and empathy in my heart.” “People trusted me, asked questions and conferred their fears and mistakes on me. And due to my arrogance, I failed to respect their confessions. I was down on my luck, but I continued at all costs to regain respect I lost by taking responsibility for the words and behavior I expressed when self-esteem deserted me.” The first false note in any message when sensed by people is severely punished by a loss in the number of followers and online reproachful debates. A tendency to indiscriminate minorities (ways of life, religion, and views) is the most dangerous ground for any disputes. Any attempt to express an unfavorable opinion on those topics is a good deal taxed. If at some point any influencer adopts a manner to look down on other people, they will despise this person in return. Social media has a smell of the sensational air and it may knock some people down by way of spreading negativity. We wish it to be territorial and stay where it was born, but the reality proves it to be much speedier than any positive, harmless piece of news. A certain instinct, not a virtuous one, makes people talk about bad things times more than about good ones. But no one stops you to have a system and an orbit of your own thinking and acting. Spreading positive, non-judgmental content is a noble life-improving mission. And I wish we had as many people following this creed as possible. Read more: Regret - an Enemy that Prevents You from Being Happy: 6 Ways to Get Rid of It 10) A Positive Channel of Valuable Information “The direction of positive influence was swiftly borne through the damp and gloomy atmosphere of failure. We are composed of little foibles and weaknesses of our kind. And to take control over them is our obligation." "My experiences strengthened my ability to reflect. Now there are no troubles that can efface love and respect that I feel, vigor and positivity that I share.” The words of love are uttered with a breath of beautiful life that is like the embrace of strong and tender arms. With social media one can share this uplifting feeling with an unlimited number of people. This activity leaves the imagination eager and full of life. Make an effort to follow the motto of spreading love in a way that the knees of people who receive it knock in delight. Let your life take a flight and prove to the world that the indestructible leading mind can enjoy the pleasure of creating peace and abundance of beauty. Try to be incapable of stupidity and hurtful blunders. Self-express in the most comfortable, profitable, and amenable way. The infinite good nature lives in everyone and is always of to-day. Read more in my books Conclusion To never loose actuality online is to listen to the feedback of your followers. Negative feedback requires a good deal of wisdom and patience to be responded in the right way. Do not be too involved when addressing it. When you look at the things in a detached way you see the picture more clearly and form an understanding in a much better way. People who can fail and redeem themselves in the eyes of others, who accused them – these people have a note of rarity. Well-intentionally disguising offense means to be able to wait wisely and act rightly. Steadiness is needed to keep the temper in peace when people refuse to accept your train of thoughts. Sometimes the best way out of it is to offer some budgets of fresh news to divert the attention. Let the things cool down and then ask forgiveness if you happen to offend someone. Remember – a spirit of candor and frankness never fails. Peoples’ hearts are sensitive plants, they open for a moment to sincere attention but curl up and shrink into themselves at the slightest touch of false feeling or rude injurious intention. Stay tuned… #OlyaAmanovaSAPblog #OlyaAmanovaBooks #OlyaAmanovaQuotes #StoriesAboutPeopleBlog #OlyaAmanovaSAPtalk #followmyblog #successinlife #successinbusiness #selfdevelopment #selfimprovement #selflove #achieveyourdreams #livefully #criticism #trueidol #internetfreedom #sociallife #pinterest #LinkedIn #Facebook #Twitter #strivingforbetterfuture #betterfuture #goalsetting #goalreaching #attractinghappiness #lawofattraction #selfdevelopment #growthhacking #happiness #personaldevelopment #lifecoach #lifecoaching #selfimprovement #selflove #mindset #entrepreneur #personalgrowth #selfhelp #positivevibes #responsibility #selfexpression #freedomofspeech

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