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Last week, I was looking forward to sharing an experience from my childhood with my 14-year-old son. We had the opportunity to get away, just the two of us, for a few days at our family’s lake cabin. We were planning to go on a boat ride, and I was very excited. Boat rides are my love language. Being at the lake restores my soul. It’s my favorite place on earth. I grew up there.

When we walked down to the dock and got in our boat, he told me he changed his mind. He wasn’t interested in going on a

Check out some more resource on how to raise Godly children.

boat ride. At all.  I was so disappointed. Crushed. And I let him know it. I had been looking forward to the wind on my face, the sound of the boat splicing through the water, and being able to forget about the stresses of life for a few minutes.

When he told me he changed his mind, I was not “slow to speak or slow to anger”.  Quite the opposite. My words crushed his spirit. I could see the pain I inflicted in his eyes the moment my words left my mouth. But it was too late. The words had already been spoken and there was no taking them back.

We spent the next hour silently avoiding each other. When he came into the kitchen, I looked up at him from the table and said, “Please come here, we need to talk.”

He told me that when I said I was disappointed, he thought I meant I was disappointed in him, and that’s what he heard and internalized. He thought I was disappointed in having him for a son, in his character, and that I wished he was different. That was the message that was playing over and over in his mind like a recorded message.

I apologized and told him I was not disappointed “in him”, that I was disappointed and let down at the situation. I asked him if he could forgive me, and he said “yes”. The next day, I checked in with him to see how he was feeling since our argument. He said it still bothered him a little. I asked if there was anything I could say or do to make things better. “No, I think it will just wear off in a day or two,” he said.

Our words carry so much weight.

They have the power to take root in our hearts and mind. They turn into attitudes and shape the way we think about ourselves and others. Words become like a compass directing our thoughts, feelings, and actions into adulthood.

I don’t want my words spoken in anger to play on repeat in my son’s mind. I want my words of encouragement, love, and acceptance to be the words he remembers.

Let’s ask the Holy Spirit each new day to help us be mindful of the weight of our words.

Erin Bishop is a writer, speaker, and Founder and Executive Director of the Whatever Girls Ministry. The Whatever Girls purpose is to empower girls, support moms, and inspire dads. Erin founded Whatever Girls as a preemptive strike for her daughter and her friends who were about to go to middle school, and was designed to encourage and equip teen girls and their moms as they navigated through their teen years. In Whatever Girls group meetings, mothers and daughters grow in their faith through Bible study, topical curriculum, talking about peer pressure, and girls are given strategies to pre-decide how to handle different scenarios when faced with peer pressure. Erin and her husband, Roger, their teenage son, Luke, and corgi puppy, Krypto, live in Eastern Washington. Their grown daughter, Grace, and son in law, Ryan, live in Western Washington. For more information about Erin and Whatever Girls visit: www.thewhatevergirls.com

The Life of a Single Mom is a global nonprofit committed to seeing no single mom walk alone. Having served more than 71,000 single mothers each year, the goal of the organization is establish support groups for single mothers in communities around the world. To date, we have worked with more than 1,500 churches & community groups to start or improve a single mom’s group. Our programs focus on empowering single moms to grow spiritually, emotionally, physically, financially, and parentally. For more information, visit www.thelifeofasinglemom.com

The post The Weight of Our Words by Erin Bishop appeared first on The Life of a Single Mom.

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When I am speaking on the topic of Mama Mad I begin by saying, “Raise your hands if you didn’t have much of a temper pre-kid.” Most of the hands go up.  “Raise your hands if you discovered your temper post-kid.”

Laughter breaks out and all the hands go up. We passionately love our kiddos and sometimes that big emotion is the catalyst to a big bad mad.

Take time to READ A BOOK that’s going to better your life, your child’s life, and the lives of those around you ! check out Peace and the Single Mom HERE.

We all have it. Some of us explode, some of us implode. One person will attack, another will withdraw. Neither approach is a good solution.

Anger is an excellent barometer, it lets us know something needs to be fixed. It acts as a great indicator, but it is an ineffective problem solver. Anger builds relational barriers and blows up the connection bridge. It separates us from the person we feel anger towards.

Since anger is one of our four basic emotions (sadness, happiness, fear, and anger) we must learn how to experience it and wield its power properly.

Name It

We can train ourselves and our kids to identify the signs that anger is rising.  Recognize signals like clenched teeth, fisted hands, a faster pulse, or a sensation of heat.

Claim It

Once we notice it we can own it. “I feel angry.” Anger is an emotion typically triggered by a softer emotion like: embarrassment, fear, betrayal, hurt, injustice, or frustration. Many times the primary emotion feels too vulnerable to admit. We don’t want to appear weak so we use anger to communicate an illusion of power. But it is really a defense and protective mechanism.

Stop It

In order to use anger well, we need to first halt the mad and access the logical part of our brain: the place where problem solving occurs. Stop the mad by developing what I call a rage interrupter. For instance: repeat a verse of scripture, make up a little song, exhale, count to ten (really), close your eyes and picture your peaceful place.  Find an interrupter that works for you in the heat of the moment.

Fix it

Once the rage has been wrangled, it’s time to get to the solution side of the problem. When fixing a problem, it is best to begin with “I statements.”  “I feel frustrated when you don’t pick up your toys when you are done playing with them. When you are done playing, pick up your things, and then we can do something else.” 

Final Note: There are situations where anger, righteous anger, is a call to action.  It may be  appropriate to blow up the relational bridge or put up a defensive barrier if there are behaviors like: abuse,  abandonment, or an affair. There are some things that can’t be fixed.

Anger, when expressed in a godly way, can be used for good. It can motivate us to solve problems and to stand up for others.

“In your anger do not sin” ~Ephesians 4:6

Parenting is Lori Wildenberg’s passion. She speaks nationally and has authored four soon to be five books. Those books include, Messy Journey: How Grace and Truth Offer the Prodigal a Way Home and Raising Little Kids with BIG Love. Lori is the co-founder of 1 Corinthians 13 Parenting, a ministry for moms and dads. Her easily applicable, relevant, relatable, and cutting edge material is presented with warmth, humor, and transparency. She admits she is not the perfect mom and openly shares stories of parent fails and successes. Lori, a licensed parent and family educator, loves to coach parents to be the parents their kids need. The Wildenberg family resides in the foothills of the Rocky Mountains. A perfect day in Lori’s world is a hike with her husband, five kids (four plus a daughter-in-love), and the family labradoodle, Murphy. You can find out more about Lori at www.loriwildenberg.com

The Life of a Single Mom is a global nonprofit committed to seeing no single mom walk alone. Having served more than 71,000 single mothers each year, the goal of the organization is establish support groups for single mothers in communities around the world. To date, we have worked with more than 1,500 churches & community groups to start or improve a single mom’s group. Our programs focus on empowering single moms to grow spiritually, emotionally, physically, financially, and parentally. For more information, visit www.thelifeofasinglemom.com

The post What To Do With Anger: Yours, Mine, & Our Kids by Lori Wildenberg appeared first on The Life of a Single Mom.

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The Life of a Single Mom’s mission is to see that no single mom walks alone.  We currently offer a large array of products, services, programs, and events for single mothers and ministry leaders who work with single mothers.  Some of those valuable resources include” curriculum for Single Moms’ Ministries, hosting of events, 100+ online life skills classes with Single Mom University, the National Single Mom of the Year Award, National Single Moms’ Conferences, fresh weekly articles, Ministry Leader Certification and training…. just to name a few!

We are currently hosting 3 different surveys to analyze our current programs and offerings to expand our work. That’s where you come in! Please take 5 minutes of your time to fill out one (or more, if qualified) of our surveys and you may win $100, just for doing it!

Are you a single mom looking for help with parenting, finances, or overall single mom survival tips? Then, consider joining Single Mom University, now offering more than 100 classes. Join HERE.

Survey #1:  Are you a current or former Single Mom University student? If so, please consider taking our Single Mom University survey HERE.

Survey #2:  Do you currently lead a single mother’s ministry, Sunday School class, outreach, support group, or program? Do you have a working knowledge of The Life of a Single Mom Ministries? If so, you are eligible to participate in our Single Mom Ministry Leaders’ survey HERE.

Survey #3:  Are you currently a single mom who has a working knowledge of The Life of a Single Mom Ministries? If so, you are eligible to take our Single Moms’ Survey HERE.

Note:  Participants must be 18 years or older and be residents of the continental United States.  Participants can only take the individual survey one time. Duplicate surveys in the same category will not be considered.  However, participants who meet the criteria for more than one survey can take each survey one time.  Only surveys that are received by July 13, 2018 at 12:00AM CST will be considered for the $100 drawing.

The Life of a Single Mom is a global nonprofit committed to seeing no single mom walk alone. Having served more than 71,000 single mothers each year, the goal of the organization is establish support groups for single mothers in communities around the world. To date, we have worked with more than 1,500 churches & community groups to start or improve a single mom’s group. Our programs focus on empowering single moms to grow spiritually, emotionally, physically, financially, and parentally. For more information, visit www.thelifeofasinglemom.com

The post You Could Win $100 for 5 Minutes of Your Time! appeared first on The Life of a Single Mom.

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Raising kids these days is tough. There are more conveniences, but there are also more distractions and access to more damaging content than ever before. At the writing of this article I am mother to a 21-year-old daughter and 17-year-old son. It can be terrifying to think about them navigating this crazy social and political world. I just want to pack them up and hide them in a bunker until the crazy wears off. Unfortunately, things may get worse before they get better so I must equip them to navigate the world successfully for themselves.

Through the fog of pregnancy and impending motherhood I decided I wanted my kids to know three things. 1) I loved them 2) I accepted them 3) I would make sure they were better prepared to live in the world than I was. I didn’t set out to be the perfect mother or raise perfect kids. I just set out to do the best I could with God’s help.

Looking for more parenting advice for single moms? Check out Kids and the Single Mom here. 

I read parenting books and researched the best way to make them feel safe and secure. I also wanted to balance their childhood experience with common sense, acceptance, and fun. I screwed up royally, of course, but I couldn’t let those setbacks sabotage my plans to raise amazing kids!

This article is about what I learned along the way and my parenting philosophy. It is by no means perfect, but it is the path I took to raise a daughter who is level-headed, talented, and responsible. It is also the method I used to raise a son who is helpful, generous, funny, and talented too.

Being a successful parent is about being a mature, and responsible adult. It takes time and you will be growing into this amazing person as you raise your children. When you are stable and secure, you can raise stable and secure kids. Here are my 4 strategies for raising awesome kids:

1.) Think positive thoughts

In a world of negativity; negative press. Negative ideals. Negative people, etc. it is challenging to think positive thoughts. People are so easy to point out what’s wrong that they can never truly see the good in anything. If you want to raise positive kids you have to be a positive person and let them hear you speak in a positive way.

2.) Create positive environment

Your home will be what you create it to be because you are the queen of the castle. Create a positive environment for you and your children. What does a positive environment look like? Well it’s more than how it is decorated. It is about openness, honesty, hope, and love. It is a place where your children are safe and free to come to you for guidance, advice, and comfort. They can open up their hearts to you because you are open and loving with them.

3.) Hang out with positive people

Going with this theme of positive experiences you are creating for your children, it the importance of hanging around positive people. Earlier I mentioned the negative influences we see everyday through the media, school, work, and basically all around us. We are the reflection of the five closest people we associate with. If we are associating with mostly negative people we are going to be just as negative as they are. The same is true when we associate with positive people. Their influence will rub off on us and we rub off on our children. Sometimes you must let go or release people who have a negative and/or pessimistic streak. This may include family, friends, and associates who have nothing good to say about people or the world.

4.) Practice forgiveness

I was the champion grudge holder when I was younger, and would cut the people off who offended me or were unfair and disrespectful. I thought I was better than them and would not let go of my righteous indignation. As I got older, I learned that I had a problem with forgiveness and that I was the prisoner to my grudge and anger. I thought that forgiving them would take them off the hook and they would continue getting away with bad behavior. If they didn’t come to me to apologize, then they would never have my forgiveness because they got away with hurting me. It was a miserable way to live. I learned forgiveness is for me not them. It is letting myself off the hook and freeing myself to be happy. My children saw this and learned to eventually become forgiving, happy people.

This is just the beginning, but it is a daily process if you want to become the most influential person in your child’s life. May God bless you through your journey. My prayers are with you.

Samantha A. Gregory is an international speaker and author who empowers women to discover their feminine and financial power so they can positively influence their world and leave a profound legacy. She is also an author, speaker, and consultant. She is the founder and editor of RichSingleMomma.com a personal finance blog for single moms in Atlanta, GA and around the world. In 2008, she started the blog, RichSingleMomma.com as a resource for helping single moms find ways to make extra money and start their own businesses. She firmly believes that single moms can thrive, not just survive! 

The Life of a Single Mom is a global nonprofit committed to seeing no single mom walk alone. Having served more than 71,000 single mothers each year, the goal of the organization is establish support groups for single mothers in communities around the world. To date, we have worked with more than 1,500 churches & community groups to start or improve a single mom’s group. Our programs focus on empowering single moms to grow spiritually, emotionally, physically, financially, and parentally. For more information, visit www.thelifeofasinglemom.com

The post Raising Awesome Kids in an Unstable World by Samantha Gregory appeared first on The Life of a Single Mom.

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If you read my last article for The Life of a Single Mom, you’re excited about The Holy Ghost carpet ride, aren’t you?! You’re in a whole new world of putting God first and dreaming again, now what? I’m glad you asked! You, my dear, have been called to greatness. You have purpose, an assignment—a Kingdom agenda and it must not be for personal gain. The Bible tells us that we were bought at a price. Simply put, it’s not about you so you can’t just, “do you” as society tells us. Who do you think put those dreams and desires on the inside of you? Now the conversation begins. Before you tell anyone else what it is you want out of life, tell God. Pray that your dreams and desires align with His Word. He’s waiting and listening. He’s the ultimate Life Coach and the best listener!

Educating single moms. Enhancing life skills. Empowering Women. For more information, visit HERE.

Once you have poured out your heart to Him, this is where trust comes in. What does it look like to trust? When we sit in a chair we’re not checking on the legs, bolts, and screws–we just sit down, right? We trust that it will hold us—we don’t think twice. That’s God! He wants us to surrender everything to Him and trust Him with it. We are to simply kick back knowing that He’s got it. What have you been believing God for? What have you given up on? Can you trust that His timing is best?

God definitely has a sense of humor because there are some things that if I knew all the details about I would have put my dirty paws in and surely messed it up, haha! If God told me in my 20’s that I would still be single in my 40’s, who knows what I would have done with that “devastating” information. But the funny thing is, it’s not devastating. What I’ve learned is that being married is not the ultimate destination. If marriage is what God has for me that’s wonderful, but I must say with full confidence and truth that I’m having the time of my life while single! Seriously, I’m living out my purpose, traveling when I want, eating what I want for dinner, and making my own decisions. This is why Paul in the Bible says that we, as singles, should be the happiest of the bunch. With putting God first and living His purpose for your life, there’s a fulfillment that no man can satisfy.

Proverbs 3: 5-6 (NKJV) says to, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths.” Perhaps He’s given you a few clues about your calling. If not, ask Him. Now it’s up to you to put what He has shown you into action. I’m all for getting someone to help with the vision and keep you accountable; it could be a pastor, coach, trusted friend or family member. Maybe it’s going back to school, joining or starting a ministry, writing a book, starting the fashion line, patenting the invention, writing the curriculum, putting on that healing conference, writing the song, play or movie, starting the business or pitching the TV show. Whatever it is, He knows and He’s waiting to hear from you. Have the conversation, trust Him with it, and let it go.

Meet Certified Life Coach, Forthcoming Author, and Speaker Kenya S. Ulmer. Kenya teaches women how to ditch the drama and distractions to get on the road to their destiny. Nothing bothers Kenya more than seeing women not understand their true worth in Jesus Christ. Her approach is aimed to get at the root of and unearth the deadly foundations that we create and live on. These foundations prevent us from living a more joyous and purpose-filled life. Kenya resides in Maryland with her daughter Sydney—queen of the selfie. To learn more and connect with Kenya, visit her at www.singlemamawithnodrama.com

The Life of a Single Mom is a global nonprofit committed to seeing no single mom walk alone. Having served more than 71,000 single mothers each year, the goal of the organization is establish support groups for single mothers in communities around the world. To date, we have worked with more than 1,500 churches & community groups to start or improve a single mom’s group. Our programs focus on empowering single moms to grow spiritually, emotionally, physically, financially, and parentally. For more information, visit www.thelifeofasinglemom.com

The post The Conversation by Kenya Ulmer appeared first on The Life of a Single Mom.

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Nothing is worse than a telephone call that comes from out of nowhere from an angry single mom who wants to “tell you like it is”.  You didn’t see it coming. You are pour heart, mind, and soul into the ministry. You eat, sleep, and breathe single moms’ ministry and love those ladies with all your heart. You have sacrificed blood, sweat, and tears to ensure that single mothers are loved, seen, and know their value in Christ. And yet, here it is – the rearing of the ugly head of criticism. It cuts like a knife, swiftly slicing through the very heart that bleeds for single moms.  In order for no single mom to walk alone, you are going to have to push through the negativity of criticism and learn to handle it well.

Check out our comprehensive single moms’ ministry training kit for more ideas on how to make your ministry successful HERE.

How you handle the next few moments of criticism will be critical for your health and the future of your ministry. Here are some of the best tips we’ve learned on how to handle the critics that will inevitably come your way:

  1. Recognize you must be doing something right.  The enemy is never happy when we take territory for Christ. When you empower single moms, teach them about the truth of who they are, and impact the lives of future generations, you can rest assured division will come. Recognize that it must be because you are doing something right. There’s comfort in that. Expect it. Know it will come.
  2. Be mature. There is no reason for you to retaliate, lash out, or air a grievance on social media for the world to see. In fact, pray about it more than you talk about it.  We must relinquish our need to be right.  Sometimes, the bitter root grows deeper, without us even realizing it, because we need to show the world we are right. How could she say that? What will they think? I need to tell them that isn’t true. The Lord is your ultimate vindicator. Be a woman of high integrity, no bitter, and no gossip. God will redeem all.
  3. Understand the root. The root is always hurt. Always. There is hurt from a past that hasn’t been resolved. That unresolved issue can cause jealousy, bitterness, and cause another to lash out. See it for what it is. It isn’t always about you.
  4. Pray for them. Prayer breaks walls. It sets captives free, and that includes you! Pray for the hurt mom. Pray for the one who criticized you. Pray for the woman in church who wont’ come to single moms’ ministry because of this or that. Pray with a genuine heart for them. Ask God to reveal any impurity in your heart that needs to be handled. Pray without ceasing. It surely changes things.
  5. Evaluate what may be true. Sometimes, there is truth to criticism, thus the term “constructive criticism”.  There may be some things that have been said that were rooted in hurt and weren’t delivered with love or kindness, but evaluate what is true. There may not always be truth to the criticism, so don’t beat yourself up, but be open enough to hear if there certain things are necessary. Could you be more loving? Could you take more time for others? Is it possible that you are long-winded? There are slivers of criticism that may help us grow, so consider what is true, and focus on improving that.

The Life of a single Mom is a national, faith-based, nonprofit that exists to see that no single mom walks alone. Our primary focus is in helping churches and communities launch single mom’s ministries and have done so more than 1,500 times! Our support groups connect 71,000 single mothers each year to a local church.   We are a one-stop shop for all things single mom ministry related. For more information, visit http://www.thelifeofasinglemom.com.

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The post How to Handle Criticism in Single Moms’ Ministry appeared first on The Life of a Single Mom.

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You’ve fought the good fight. You’ve battled well. You planted a new single moms’ ministry in your church. You’ve served and prayed and cooked and cleaned. You’ve taken out trash. You’ve seen lives change. You’ve had a broken heart and a joyful one. You’ve laughed and cried. But now, you sense God is prompting you to move on. What are the next steps?

First, every leader should be thinking about the succession plan of the group very early on. Whether you’ve been at this 6 months or many years, it’s important to always be thinking about the long-term plan for the ministry that will sustain the ministry long after you are gone. It’s so important that we recognize that the ministry is not OUR ministry. It is God’s. And His heart is for the single mothers to be blessed long after we leave.  It may not be something that you plan to do any time soon, but always be praying and looking.

Check out our comprehensive single moms’ ministry training kit for more ideas on how to make your ministry successful HERE.

Recognize when it’s time for you to move on.  This is tricky, especially if you’ve invested many years of blood, sweat, and tears into the ministry.  Seasons change for many reasons. Maybe you are ready to retire, in general. Perhaps your heart is not into it as much as it once was. Maybe God has raised up a Joshua in your group and you’ve taken the team as far as you were  supposed to and now it’s the new leader’s time to lead.  The important thing is to remember that there is a time for everything under the sun. This means your time to begin will come and your time to end will come. Don’t hold onto the reigns too long. Too many leaders stay their post past their term and usually those reasons are rooted in insecurity or control.  Learning to clearly discern the voice of God will help you know when it’s time to stay planted and when it’s time to move on.

Always have a team.  It’s never about “me”. It’s always about “we”. The more you use the “we” terminology, the more the volunteer team becomes truly a team. We want the leadership/volunteer team to take ownership of the group.  Just as the church doesn’t belong to a pastor, the single moms’ ministry doesn’t belong to a leader. This is a team effort with team goals and Kingdom purpose. Raise up a team around you that will position you well for transition in the future, or even just to help you carry the banner for single mothers. For more information on volunteers, visit HERE.

Transition well.  When you are ready to leave the group, ensure you have communicated clearly to the pastoral team. Stay long enough to train the new group leader, before you depart (when possible). Act as an ongoing support to her after you are gone, committing in prayer and wise counsel for her.  Be sure to always honor her new authority, even when you don’t agree.  When a leader has been in her position for some time, there will always been a transition season, whereby ladies want to call you to discuss “what she did” or “what she said”, or maybe they simply circumvent her all together and come to you for advice and counsel. Get in the habit of speaking highly of her at all times and also referring ladies to her. A good response to such a phone call may be, “Have you talked to Jan about his yet? I’m sure she’d love the opportunity to pray with you.”

The Life of a single Mom is a national, faith-based, nonprofit that exists to see that no single mom walks alone. Our primary focus is in helping churches and communities launch single mom’s ministries and have done so more than 1,500 times! Our support groups connect 71,000 single mothers each year to a local church.   We are a one-stop shop for all things single mom ministry related. For more information, visit http://www.thelifeofasinglemom.com.

The post When to Pass the Baton in Single Moms Ministry appeared first on The Life of a Single Mom.

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Ministry can often be a lonely road. Pastors are quitting in droves and many are avoiding ministry all together.  Ministry often leads to long days and few thanks. It often leads to more criticism than accolades.  If you are currently leading a Single Moms Ministry in your church, it is likely you will face challenges at some point or another. The road gets hard as you face criticism or burnout, and the sting is compounded if you feel unsupported by your church.

Looking for new Bible study curriculum for your Single Moms’ Group? Check these out HERE.

In 2007, our founder, Jennifer Maggio, started a single moms’ ministry in her local church. It grew rather quickly from 3 single moms to several dozen.  She had such a passion to minister to single moms that hosted the event in her home, paid for the meals, and coordinated volunteer childcare with friends and family. Throughout the course of time, there were challenges that arose, including her feeling unsupported by the church. Yes, they had given her the blessing to start the ministry, but it seemed that they weren’t helping with much of the process, including food provision, childcare needs, or even advertising the ministry on the church website or print materials.  In fact, it often seemed that “every other ministry” was getting their time in the spotlight on Sundays, but not single moms’ ministry. The following are tips that will help you navigate a tough season, when you feel unsupported.

Whether you are currently in single moms’ ministry or you are patiently waiting on your pastor’s approval to start a single moms’ program, these tips will help you:

  1. Always honor your leadership. God has placed them in authority for a reason. Even when you feel unsupported, it is important that you honor their position as the shepherd of the flock.  God will honor your pure heart.  Your words should honor your leadership at all times, both in front of others and behind closed doors with close friends and family.  Otherwise a bitter root can grow that will expand and you will never be supported! Don’t be a rebel that decides to do your own thing.  There’s protection in staying rooted in a local church. There’s much to be learned.
  2. Pray for it more than you talk about it. As with any other obstacle in our lives, we should pray without ceasing. The problem with most of us is that we’d rather talk about it than pray about it. Petition the Lord with your concerns. Ask Him for wisdom and guidance on how to navigate the season.
  3. Be patient.  Let’s face it. Pastors are busy. They are being pulled in many directions for meetings, counseling, and teaching. Sometimes, it just takes time to gain the trust of your pastors, to gain their attention regarding the needs of single moms’ ministry, or to gain their support in advertising and expanding the work.  The bigger the ministry grows, the harder it will be to ignore.  Additionally, if you are waiting patiently on a yes from your pastor and he hasn’t given than to you yet, be patient. if God truly called you to it, He’ll open the door in his perfect timing. Work on yourself in the meantime. Grow in the Word. Grow in maturity. Grow in prayer life.  These things will sustain you over the long haul, when you do get your yes!
  4. Stay faithful. Change doesn’t happen overnight.  You keep plowing the land. Keep inviting new single moms. Keep teaching the few that show up each meeting. Keep studying and praying. Don’t grow weary in doing what God has called you to do. Even if the ministry never grows beyond a few moms, it has meant something to those precious single moms!
  5. Serve another vision.  We can get so passion about our own calling (single moms’ ministry) that it’s hard to see why others aren’t just as passionate.  Maybe your pastor has called the church to be more active in volunteerism in the community or maybe he feels led to expand the college or youth ministry this year.  Support his vision and plan for the church. God will bring about change and support to the single moms’ ministry in his timing.
  6. Meet with your pastoral team regularly.  Whether you are accountable to the executive pastor, woman’s or ministry pastors, or another leadership member, be sure you communicate with them often. Let them know the wins the ministry is seeing. Engage them in dialogue on ideas they may have about the ministry.  Tell them the challenges you face and the concerns you have about receiving their support. We know that we are called to take our problem to our brother in hopes of resolution. Don’t get bitter. Make the ministry better.

For encouraging tips on how to start, grow, or maintain a single moms’ ministry in your church, visit our Ministry Leader’s Help page often.

The Life of a single Mom is a national, faith-based, nonprofit that exists to see that no single mom walks alone. Our primary focus is in helping churches and communities launch single mom’s ministries and have done so more than 1,500 times! Our support groups connect 71,000 single mothers each year to a local church.   We are a one-stop shop for all things single mom ministry related. For more information, visit http://www.thelifeofasinglemom.com.

The post What To Do When You Feel Unsupported in Single Moms Ministry appeared first on The Life of a Single Mom.

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I do not think I have ever had a good boyfriend.  A few liars…yes! Some cheaters…those too! Abusers…definitely! However, a great guy, that loved me for me… I don’t remember that.

I have had a propensity of dating men that needed to use me in an effort to feel better about themselves. I have dated the guy that married the girl that he cheated with (wait that happened twice). I have dated the guy that professed his loved for me after he hit me. I have dated the guy that left for 8 years and then came back to me, as I raised our 9 year old child (alone), wanting me to act like the abandonment never happened. I have dated them all.

What I realized, however, was that I had a propensity for this. I had the tendency to date boys. These boys were emotionally and sometimes mentally broken. I did this! I engaged in every moment. I pushed pass every desire to leave. I stayed! 

I also realized, that I had a divine purpose. A purpose, that once fulfilled, will outweigh every broken promise, every tear that has fallen, and every time my heart broke open.

When I realized who I was, my propensity for the nonsense stopped. I am now at peace.

As an Organizational & Executive Strategist, Author, Professional Speaker, and with over 10 years of experience in Leadership, Administration, & Business, Dr. Sheika Square is one of this generations pioneering leaders and captivating speakers. Along with the knowledge to make solutions and resolutions elucidated, Dr. Sheika Square’s ability to penetrate her audience and move them to action is unparalleled. Her work as a financial consultant and mentor/leader in the fields of Business and Education adds to her ability to disseminate unique messages.

After over a decade in education, finance, and leadership, Dr. Square launched Priority Writing Approach, LLC in an attempt to foster the growth she desperately desires in others. Today, with fascinating and enlightening antidotes, Dr. Sheika Square speaks to groups on topics that offer insight into self and/or organizational maneuvering.

The Life of a Single Mom is a global nonprofit committed to seeing no single mom walk alone. Having served more than 71,000 single mothers each year, the goal of the organization is establish support groups for single mothers in communities around the world. To date, we have worked with more than 1,500 churches & community groups to start or improve a single mom’s group. Our programs focus on empowering single moms to grow spiritually, emotionally, physically, financially, and parentally. For more information, visit www.thelifeofasinglemom.com

The post Emotionally Open by Dr. Sheika Square appeared first on The Life of a Single Mom.

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To date, The Life of a Single Mom Ministries has worked with more than 1500 churches throughout the United States to help them launch, grow, or improve their single moms’ ministry programs. We specialize in single moms’ curriculum, event planning, program development, and are considered a one-stop shop for all things single moms ministry related.  And…we are often asked, “What about single dads’ ministries? Where do all the single dads go to get help?”

With approximately 80% of all domiciliary custody in the United States being held by women, we recognize that the biggest need is in the single mothers’ home. This is what we see as the biggest ministry opportunity.  And we cannot do everything or be everywhere. That said, we do recognize that single dads exist and want to address some things that we think will be effective in ministering to the needs of single dads.

We believe that single dads’ ministries are important and can be launched in a church very similarly to a single mothers’ ministry. They can co-exist quite nicely, the same way that singles ministries, divorce recovery programs, grief ministries, and widows ministries can all co-exist in the same church. In other words, there are many opportunities to meet the needs of many singles in our congregation.  Single Dads may not be as large of a demographic, but launching a program can be a great way to find those single dads in the community who are overwhelmed, exhausted, and alone. A great way to start is with a small single dad’s Bible study launching in someone’s home (with the church’s approval).

Co-ed single parent’s ministries can work, but we suggest gender-exclusive ministries that co-mingle on a regular basis. Single Moms can be devastated by a divorce, failed relationship, or death of a spouse, as can single dads. Co-ed environments can create a level of discomfort among those who have not yet healed from such an event. They can also be a breeding ground for unhealthy relationships, when individuals are not ready to move on.  We suggest separate single moms’ ministries and single dads’ ministries that get together for fun events regularly, such as barbecues, family fun nights, and the like.

(Please note: All churches we work with have the complete autonomy to make the decisions that work best for their church, congregation, and long-term vision. We are a consulting service for single moms’ ministries. We highlight what we see as national trends and industry standards that work best, but there is no right or wrong. As ministry evolves, we also recognize that needs change, too. We recommend praying and seeing how God would lead in this area.)

Some of our favorite single dads’ ministries and programs are as follows:

SINGLE DADS RESOURCES: While a variety of our TLSM Resources can be (and are) used by both single moms and single dads, we also want to refer you to other friends we’ve found serve single dads exclusively.

For additional encouragement, check out:

 A Father’s Walk  for additional encouragement.

Single Parent Advocate

Fatherhood.org (Please note this is not an exclusively Christian organization.)

The Life of a Single Mom’s National Resource Pamphlet to help find resources for education, housing, financial assistance, and more encouragement can be found HERE.

CHURCH OPPORTUNITIES FOR MINISTRY TO SINGLE DADS: There are ways that the church can get involved in ministering to single fathers and the opportunities are only limited by your imagination, but here are a few things we suggest:

4 Ways the Church Can Minister to Single Dads

Start a Single Dads Ministry using our Launch a Group Instructions.

MENTORING SERVICES:  Mentoring is a great way for single dads to get involved in mentoring fatherless youth. We know you are busy, but you also bring great value to the body of Christ when you can invest in children who don’t have a positive male role model. It will also give you a sense of purpose as you serve others. There are a number of great mentoring services available in different areas of the United States.  While listing below does not constitute any formal partnership, we like these two groups:

Fathers in the Field

The Mentoring Project

New Commandment Men’s Ministries allows men in the church to serve single mothers and widows in an organized way.  To institute a men’s ministry team in your church, check their website out. This is also a great way for single dads to be busy on the weekend, allowing them a chance to fellowship with other dads.

The Life of a Single Mom is a national, faith-based, nonprofit that is one of the nation’s largest single-mom centric organizations. We focus on equipping churches and communities on how to reach single mothers, establish ministry plans, and grow existing single moms’ programs. We provide curriculum, training, host events, and offer a wide array of single mom products and services to ensure that no single mom walks alone. Currently, we are serving 72,000+ single mothers each year. For more information, visit www.thelifeofasinglemom.com

The post What About Single Dads’ Ministries? appeared first on The Life of a Single Mom.

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