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Have you ever been an audience member during a speaking presentation or concert where the audience is asked to do something to participate—like share something to the group, or clap, or sing? You remember that feeling? Yeah, you do. I’ve always hated that shit. It triggers whatever big red Discomfort Button that lives in the […]
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I almost wrote something outrageous about how Galileo Galilei’s and Isaac Newton’s first law of motion was effing up relationships. The first law of motion—also called the “law of inertia”—states that a body or object at rest remains at rest, and that a body or object in motion continues to move at a constant velocity […]
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I felt that little jolt of hope and nervous excitement in my chest when I saw the unopened email and recognized who it was from. Please let this be it. It wasn’t it. “Dear Matt. You’re not good enough. I’m not interested. Good luck.” Damn it, I thought. I can’t believe this is happening again. […]
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Pop quiz: If your relationship problems are decreasing mathematically and your romantic partner is observably adjusting his or her behavior in an honest attempt to connect with you emotionally, but your brain and subsequent emotions are telling you otherwise, is your relationship actually improving? But Matt! What a silly question! If my partner were lovingly […]
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I know what you’re probably not thinking: I really want to listen to Matt blather on about conflict in relationships! And because you’re not thinking that, this is me encouraging you to start thinking about it because clearly I’m an attention-whore. Therapist and author Lesli Doares, because she’s kind and gracious, invites me onto her podcast Happily […]
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Oh no. You feel disrespected by your wife. This is definitely bad for your marriage and a poor example for any children you might have. You’ve done the best possible thing you could have in this situation, and I hope you’ll choose to feel good about it. You’ve asked great questions: Why doesn’t my wife […]
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We pulled into our parking space in Florida’s version of the “happiest place on earth,” and all of my insides were knotted up. In my left pocket was the most expensive thing I’d ever bought—a pretty pear-shaped diamond engagement ring I’d been secretly paying off for months. This felt like the place. Disney World’s Magic […]
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Editor’s Note: This is a guest post from my friend and colleague, Jenee Day. Jenee is a long-time anxiety sufferer who now shares her experiences in an effort to help others via her podcast, YouTube channel, and through her coaching and writing. Jenee is the author of “Fear Itself: How Battling Anxiety Brought Me Inner […]
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Only two kinds of people could help me feel better during my first year of coping with, adjusting to, and healing from my divorce. The first kind of person was a friend or family member who knew me before I was married. My relationship with them lived independent of my marriage. My identity—for them—wasn’t intertwined […]
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“Why does my wife hate me?” My initial reaction was to tell you that your wife doesn’t hate you, but the uncomfortable truth is that she might. She might actually hate you. Let’s deal with it. The definition for ‘hate,’ according to Merriam-Webster, is “a: intense hostility and aversion usually deriving from fear, anger, or […]

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