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6 First Date Conversation Tips:

Setting up your online dating profile, finding the right photos to upload which show you in a good light, writing a bio, these can all be difficult to do and take time to get right. It’s a bit like preparing for a job interview, except that you’re preparing to meet people to date and hopefully find the man or woman of your dreams.

However, often the hardest – and certainly most nerve-wracking part of dating – can be the first time you meet someone face-to-face. Chemistry is important of course, but getting the conversation right is just as important.

Nerves can often take over and can even overwhelm some people. There will always be nerves before the first time you meet someone new and you can become more shy than normal, or you could go the other way and become too much of a chatterbox.

People can appear robotic in questions they ask and in what they say about themselves.

There are many topics to avoid talking about on a first date, but equally, it’s important to ask questions, be a good listener and be yourself. Here are my top ten conversation tips on a first date:

1) Ask plenty of “Questions” – Your conversation should be flowing. It’s very important to ask your date questions and not just talk about yourself. If you do this, you will seem interested in them and keen to know more about them. If you don’t ask questions, you will come across as being self-absorbed, uninterested and rude.

2) Ask your date about their “Favourites” – This is a good way to show your date that you are interested in their life and it will also make the conversation fun as well. It could be anything from their favourite food or cocktail to their favourite film, sport, book or holiday destination. If you both have the same “favourite” and have certain things in common, it will prolong your conversation and could even lead to an idea for a second date.

3) Don’t talk about “Politics” or “Religion” – There is an old saying about topics that you should avoid discussing at a dinner table, but the same holds true for a first date. There are plenty of other things to be talking about on a first date and most people don’t want to go “too deep” in conversation on a first date, especially on topics in which they might have strong beliefs and opinions about. These topics may be important to you, but wait a while before talking about these topics in great detail.

4) Avoid the “Ex” conversation – Of course, everyone has a past and most people will have at least one “Ex”. Your date knows you have a past, but they usually don’t want to hear about them at this stage. Keep away from the “Ex” conversation until you know each other better. It will inevitably come up in conversation in time, but as a general rule, it’s best to stay away from the subject altogether on a first date if you can. It can make things feel awkward between you. If your date brings up the subject, it’s best to try and keep answers short (without appearing suspicious). If needed, reassure your date that your past is history and that you want to spend your time getting to know them instead. If your date frequently talks about an “Ex”, it’s likely they’re on the rebound and haven’t got over a recent split.

5) Have some “Fun!” – It’s essential on your first date to try and avoid any negative, in-depth conversations, such as why you don’t enjoy your job, any bad dating experiences you’ve had, money problems, or any other issues you might have been having. Keep the conversation light-hearted and talk about fun experiences you’ve had. Try and sprinkle some humour into your conversation as well. Both women and men want someone who can make them laugh and someone who has a good sense of humour. You do have to be serious at times, but in the early stages of dating, don’t forget to have some fun!

6) Don’t “Lie!” – It is important not to lie to your date. It’s not a good way to start a relationship and it’s not nice to be lied to. When people want to be liked, they can lie about the truth to appear more authentic to their date. A date is actually a meeting where your aim is to find out more about the person you’re interested in, so in what way does a lie favour you in doing that? Just remember that the truth will always come out in the end and that there’s never a happy ending when someone lies.

I hope you find these tips helpful. To read more tips and advice about dating, you can purchase my book, Love At First Swipe, from Amazon and from all other leading stockists.

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It normally takes a while to form a new relationship after breaking up with someone that you loved or had strong feelings for, but a “rebound relationship” happens fairly quickly

A rebound relationship usually occurs when you’ve broken up with someone and have entered into a new relationship with someone else almost immediately. It often occurs when you’re feeling isolated, hurt, lonely and desperate.

Everyone has a different defence mechanism and a different way of dealing with a tough break up. Some people shed tears and don’t want to meet anyone new for a long time afterwards. Some choose the alternative, which is an instant healing process, where they look to meet someone new almost immediately.

If you find yourself in such a situation, you may feel that you have to prove to yourself that someone out there wants you again and getting an ego-boost is often a short-term remedy to hiding the hurt you are really feeling.

Sometimes, people will use an online dating app or go to a bar looking for casual fun, as they hope that will take away the pain and hurt in which they are suffering.

Often, people use a new aquaintance to make them feel better about themselves, as their feelings are a mixture of anger and hurt, but if you genuinely want to get to know someone new, then it’s OK to start dating again.

In my opinion, if a relationship ended on good terms and was a mutual decision, entering into a new relationship can still be classed as a rebound relationship because one of you, or both of you, may not want to enter into anything serious again so soon after a break up which might have been on the cards for a while.
If you were the one who ended a relationship, the rebound is more likely to work. However, if you were the person who was hurt, this may affect your self-image, which will make you more emotionally unstable.

A rebound relationship can occur whether you’ve been with someone for 1 year or for 21 years. Obviously, the longer you’ve been with someone, the more history and memories you will have with your “ex”, so this often makes it harder to move on, as you simply can’t forget, especially if you loved someone – and may still do. If you had children with your “ex”, this can make it even harder to move on.

Statistics tell us that a rebound relationship lasts around 6-8 weeks on average. The main reason for a rebound relationship ending (90% of all rebound relationships end) is because they often occur after a romantic relationship has ended and there are still lingering feelings that one person may have for their ex-partner.

Here are Six common signs of a rebound relationship:

1) A new relationship begins soon after a break-up

2) You start seeing someone to make your “ex” jealous

3) You become involved with someone casually

4) You feel bitter in a new relationship

5) You talk about your “ex” regularly

6) You avoid any talk whatsoever about your “ex”

The dating world is full of people whose feelings are confused and there are many people who are on the rebound, sometimes not even realising they are. Unfortunately, being on the rebound can lead to people not telling the complete truth in order so they get what they want, but some of the tell-tale signs are that they talk about their “ex” a lot, that they want sex with you very quickly, or that they often ignore messages you send them and reply to you in their own time, without much feeling to their messages.

On the flip side, the person on the rebound may also be exploited as well, as they are more vulnerable and at a higher risk of being manipulated and exploited. Trust can also be a problem, as you may find it hard to trust someone again.

For a relationship to be a healthy and happy one, it’s usually best to wait a while until you start dating again, as your feelings will be all over the place after a hard break-up and it’s likely you won’t be in a good place straight after.

Having said that, a study was carried out by researchers at Queens College and the university of Illinois in 2014. Their research revealed that rebound relationships help the recently broken-hearted to move on and heal more quickly than ex-partners who deal with the break-up by not dating again for some time.

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In my Exclusive News Story about safety fears for online daters, the article talks about how the number of trolls, perverts and scammers on internet dating sites and apps has allegedly trebled within nearly a decade, sparking fears and concerns for online safety and leading to calls for tighter regulation.

The platforms see approximately three times as many “sinister, exploitative individuals” as there were before their popularity exploded in the early 2000’s.

Singletons looking for love and romance must now contend with more “huddled, fraudsters and worse” than ever, putting innocent members – and especially first-time users – at risk.

The Federal Trade Commission in the US also issued a warning to consumers in July 2018, about an increase in online romance scams, where known cases in the US tripled between 2012 and 2016.

It’s often difficult to spot a romance scammer and can be hard for dating apps to stop them setting up an online dating profile, as they tend to be very clever and very manipulative, but there are precautions that you can take and signs that you can look out for.

For example, spelling mistakes and the use of bad grammar; the lack of photos posted; only one photo posted – but it’s usually of someone who looks absolutely stunning (they often use photos taken from modelling sites and magazines); someone who contacts you from another country; someone who refuses to talk to you on the phone or by Skype; someone who always makes an excuse not to meet up; someone who asks you for money; – it’s basically a grooming process and the scammer will ask you for money in the name of love. They prey on people’s loneliness, desperation and weaknesses.

The alarm bells in your head should also start ringing if other users of Online Dating sites and apps want to swap phone numbers straight away, or want to meet up with you almost immediately. Tread carefully and don’t swap numbers with someone immediately. If they’re not after a quick bunk-up, they could be scammers who will lie to you with the aim of stealing your hard earned cash. Never give out your financial details to anyone, or tell someone where you live. They may also be lying to you about their relationship status, as it could be that they’re married and are only looking for sex.

They could also be a very dangerous individual who is looking to cause you harm. The number of sex attacks involving dating apps is on the rise and this is where I believe dating apps should be doing more to help protect their users.

Worryingly, the number of sex attacks reported is likely to be a lot higher. Some attacks are not reported due to sheer fear, or the shame and humiliation that people often feel in such a situation. Often, victims of a sexual assault will blame themselves and people will often be angry with themselves, feeling they lost control of the situation. People will often meet someone online without telling anyone, as many people still have a stigma against online dating. If you’re a woman especially, let someone know where you’re going on a date. Nowadays, you can also put a GPS tracker on your phone and link it to a friend’s phone so they can see where you are at any time.

You can read my Exclusive News Story here which looks at what dating apps could be doing better to help prevent scammers from contacting you.

My new book, Love at First Swipe, also provides sound advice on how you can spot a romance scammer. It’s available now on Amazon UK priced £8.99 in paperback and £3.99 as an eBook.

You can also visit my website for more dating news and advice: https://loveatfirstswipe.online/

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Dating can be hard and everyone has nerves on a first date, no matter who you are, but you should also feel excitement too. It’s important to make a good first impression.

You only get one chance to make a good first impression. Not only will you be judged on your appearance, but also on your attitude and personality as well. You should feel excitement at the prospect of meeting your date for the first time. At the same time, feeling nervous too is perfectly normal, as both of these feelings go hand-in-hand.

You need to get the first date basics right so here are “7 Deadly Sins of Online Dating” – things you should avoid on a date. If you manage to avoid these “7 Dating DONT’S”, you’ll have a greater chance of success:

1) DON’T be Late!:

The first deadly sin is to not be late! Punctuality is so important, especially on the first date. If you show up late, the first message you give out to your date is that you don’t care. Leave your home earlier than usual which will reduce your chances of a late arrival. If you’re late, it will tell your date that you’re unable to manage your time properly.

2) Be Confident but DON’T be Arrogant:

A man or woman with confidence can be a very attractive trait. Most people see confidence as an important factor when it comes to choosing a partner. Even if you’re a little shy, you can practice beforehand by talking to someone you know. Of course, the more dates you go on, the more experience you gain and the more confident you should naturally become. Plan what you’re going to talk about on your date, including subjects that you’re enthusiastic about, such as any hobbies you have or sports you participate in.

You should find out as much information as you can about your date before you meet them face to face, as it’s even better if you have mutual interests that you can talk about. Many people are shy and worry terribly about their appearance. It’s more attractive if your date sees that you’re comfortable in your own skin and are happy being you.

There is a fine line between confidence and arrogance though. The last thing your date wants to hear is you bragging and talking about yourself all night! Try to keep the conversation flowing, but make sure you ask questions and also compliment your date as well.

3) DON’T talk about your ‘Exes’:

Most of us have a history of exes. We’ve all had personal issues and relationship problems that we’ve had to deal with in the past, but it’s best to never admit anything to a new acquanintence and potential lover on the first date. Your date knows you have a past, but they usually don’t want to hear about it. Keep away from the “ex” conversation until you know each other better, as this will inevitably come up in conversation in time. As a general rule, it’s best to stay away from the conversation altogether on a first date if you can.

Your date does not usually want to hear about your ex and it can make things feel awkward between you. If your date does bring up the subject, it’s best to try and keep answers short (without appearing suspicious). If needed, reassure your date that your past is history and that you want to spend your time getting to know them instead. If your date talks a lot about an ex, it’s likely they’re on the rebound and haven’t got over a recent split. This is not a good sign! It’s usually best to avoid dating someone who has only recently come out of a long term relationship as their head may be all over the place and their feelings could still be very raw.

4) Turn OFF your Phone:

It’s annoying and irritating if a phone starts ringing in the middle of your date and it’s rude if you answer it in front of the person you are with. There may be a genuine reason to have your phone switched on, but at least make sure you have it on silent or on vibrate. If you need to check it, you should always do this when you go to the bar or go for a comfort break. If you check it in front of your date, it says to them that you’re not interested and that you’re not focusing entirely on your date. It would be very rude and disrespectful. They will appreciate it more if you take the time to engage with them fully.

5) Have GOOD Hygiene:

One absolute must is to practice good hygiene. Whilst looks aren’t everything, both men and women are often impressed by a person who appears to take pride in their appearance and by someone who looks after themselves. Make sure you are clean, that you wear your favourite clothes or outfit (but don’t look scruffy) and that your clothes are clean too. Splash on your favourite perfume or aftershave and brush your teeth. The above all might sound obvious, but believe me, not everyone takes care in the hygiene department or takes pride in how they look and smell. There is nothing more off-putting than being with someone with bad hygiene!

6) DON’T have Bad Body Language:

According to Elle magazine, research shows that 70 to 90 percent of our communication is nonverbal. Most gestures mean something, so showing your date that you’re comfortable spending time with them is important. Smiling often, maintaining good posture (dont slouch!), making good eye contact with your date and keeping your body relaxed are all important factors when you’re on a date.

7) Be Kind and DON’T be Rude!:

Be kind to your date and don’t treat them badly. Try not to swear, be polite and have good manners. If you’re a man, open the door for the lady and let her choose where she wants to sit. Whether you end up liking each other or not, you’ve both invested a lot of time and energy into preparing for your date, so don’t be rude and don’t disappear on them suddenly.

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Around one in four of us are now finding love online and this figure will only increase over the next few years.

The stigma that was once attached to Online Dating has well and truly disappeared. We now live in the internet age, where social media is king.

My new book, Love At First Swipe, is a comprehensive guide to modern online dating, which is aimed at people of all ages, genders, orientations and abilities.

To read more, please click on my following social media links:

Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/garethfosberry/

Facebook Author Page: https://www.facebook.com/loveatfirstswipe.online/

Facebook Book Page: https://www.facebook.com/swipingforlove.online/

Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/garethfosberry

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/gfoz76

Amazon: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1912615460/

Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/garethfosberry/

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Hi everyone! The awesome @I_am_Sheqo has nominated me for the “Versatile Blogger Award”! I am honoured and incredibly grateful to get this recognition and it means so much to me! Check out their page here – http://sheqoz.com

RULES FOR THE VERSATILE BLOGGER AWARD:

1. Thank the blogger for nominating you and link to their blog. 2. Write a blog post on your website showing the award. 3. Describe the story of why you started your blog. 4. Write two pieces of advice you have for new bloggers. 5. Nominate 15 more bloggers. 6. Notify each of your nominees that you have nominated them.

Why I started my blog?

I started my blog because of my great passion for writing and because I wanted to help people. I mainly blog about love and dating related topics.

Blogging gives me an excuse to express my views and talk about topics which I feel people are interested in and should know more about.

It’s amazing how much satisfaction you get from sharing your views with the world. I would definitely recommend that you start blogging if you haven’t done so already.

I started my blog around the same time that I was writing my debut book, Love At First Swipe. Finding love is the most amazing feeling in the world and I wanted to try and help people in their search for love.

2 pieces of advice for new bloggers

1. Make sure you have a clear idea of what your subject matter is – your niche – and have a clear plan about what you’re going to write about, before you start your blog!

2. Write with freedom and make sure the content is of high quality. It doesn’t matter how long or short your post is as long as you’ve put 100% into it! Read through what you’ve written several times before you press the ‘publish’ button, then sit back and watch the number of followers, comments and likes build up!

My nominations are:

1. Juelook

https://www.juelook.com

Her blog is amazing and talks about beauty, fashion and shopping topics in great detail.

2. QueenOfTheGirlGeeks

https://queenofthegirlgeeks.com/

She is a beauty blogger and her amazing blog looks at beauty products.

3. Kalpana Govi

https://topcashsaving.com/

This great blog looks at how to save money better and provides money tips on how to lead a rich life.

4. Shenzy Paradise

https://shenzyparadise.com/

A colourful and beautiful blog which exudes feeling, emotion and poetry.

5. Read to Survive

https://www.readtosurvive.com/?m=1

An awesome book blogger who writes about anything and everything to do with books.

6. Savana Rae

http://www.officialsavanarae.com/2019/03/oriental-amber-and-rose-argan-oil-by-formidable-london.html?m=1

An amazing beauty and lifestyle blog with great attention to detail.

7. Little Catch Up

https://littlecatchup.co.uk/

A lifestyle and wellbeing blog, this great blog also specialises in website building with expert content and SEO writing.

8. Lea Bella blogs

https://www.leabellablogs.com/

An awesome travel and lifestyle blog with great content throughout.

9. Rachel Teodoro

https://www.rachelteodoro.com/?m=1

A really informative blog about “real people, real projects, real life”, such as finances, travel and DiY.

10. Katherine

https://mamahomelife.com/

An amazing blog from a lifestyle blogger, all about “the life of a do it all from home Mama”, covering everything a Mum needs to know – from potty training to teething.

11. Our Favourite Jar

https://ourfavouritejar.home.blog/

A beautiful personal blog which covers many topics ranging from parenting to places Claire has visited.

12. A Brewed Awakening

https://abrewedawakeningmommyblog.blogspot.com/?m=1

An awesome “mummy blog” providing great advice, opinions and reviews.

13. Some Kind of 50

https://somekindof50.com/

A positivity blogger and mental health advocate, this is one amazing blog!

14. Live Life Liberated

http://livelifeliberated.com/

A mental health advocate, this great blog discusses many different aspects and perspectives of life.

15. Currently, Lately

https://currentlylately.com/

A beauty and lifestyle blog with great information provided – including help with blogging.

Thanks again for the nomination! I hope you enjoyed my post on this great award!

– Gareth / Love At First Swipe

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Nowadays, the unwritten rules of dating etiquette are looser than they have ever been before.

Having said that, the majority of people do not sleep with someone on the first date, in the belief that another person should earn the right to be intimate with them before they share the same bed together.

Some people just go with the flow, some people have a 3-date rule and some have 5-date rule. Some people don’t have sex with another person until they’ve both declared their love for one another. Religion can also determine how soon you have sex with someone.

Online dating has many pitfalls and the person you’ve been chatting to for a while may turn out to be a completely different person in real life when you meet them face-to-face!

There isn’t a right or wrong answer to this question, but as long as sex is consensual and you both want the same thing, there’s nothing wrong with having sex on the first date. If you both want different things, then it’s best to have a discussion together first, but in this particular instance, it’s definitely best not to sleep with the other person on the first date.

Alcohol can also play a big part in any decision you both make, so my advice would be to not drink too much alcohol on a first date, as that can confuse how you think and you might end up doing something that you later regret.

Here are 5 reasons for having sex on a first date and 5 reasons against having sex on the first date:

Reasons FOR having sex on the first date:

1) It’s been so long since the last time you had sex and because you’ve been away from the dating scene for some time, you find the idea of someone coming on to you just too irresistible.

2) The attraction level and chemistry between you both is so strong that you just can’t help yourself. You may have known this person for some time and you may be physically attracted to them if nothing else.

3) Life is short. You want to live on the edge and have as much excitement as you can, while you can. You are not interested in a proper relationship and you are only looking for something casual.

4) You both like each other, so waiting is pointless as you don’t want to waste any time.

5) With the advent of online dating, the dating landscape has changed and you can actually get to know someone really well before meeting them in person for the first time, as opposed to meeting someone in a bar for the first time and not knowing a thing about them.

Reasons AGAINST having sex on the first date:

1) If they’re sleeping with you on the first date, how many other people are they sleeping with?

2) Always practice SAFE SEX! In a heterosexual encounter, the female could become pregnant. Also, either of you could contract an unwanted STI. Wear a condom, take your pills, do whatever you need to do to stay safe. If you’re having sex with someone on the first date, there’s a far greater risk of you contracting an STI.

3) You want to get to know the person better before you decide on becoming so intimate with them. Sex is the most intimate thing you can do, so you don’t want to give them a “freebie” for simply just knowing you. They should have to earn it!

4) You might have sex with someone if you’ve had a few drinks and because you feel it’s the right thing to do if your date wants to do the same. But, your date might feel like they’ve been used if you realise the next day that your feelings aren’t strong enough to want to see them again. Try to have a clear head before sleeping with someone.

5) It’s much better to wait a few dates and get to know someone first. Building up a closer connection with someone before you have sex makes sex so much better when you reach that stage.

Read here about contrasting stories of 14 women who “Get Real About Sex On The First Date”.

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For many people with learning disabilities, finding love, being in a relationship and meeting new people can prove extremely difficult as they are often faced with barriers and challenges that prevent them from finding what many people take for granted. However, there are now specialised dating agencies out there who can help provide the support needed to meet new people and help those people with learning difficulties find romance, friendship or companionship.

Everyone has a need for affection and intimacy, including people with learning disabilities, yet many people with learning disabilities don’t get to have this type of relationship because of a lack of social and practical support. Added to this, it doesn’t help that many people in society have a negative and stereotypical attitude towards people with a learning disability. Those attitudes appear to be slowly changing, but it’s evident that many people still don’t understand what having a “learning disability” actually means.

One student in the UK says a newly created dating agency for people with learning disabilities gives people like her “hope” that they can find new friends and love.

Safe Soulmate
A new Not-for-profit dating agency called “Safe Soulmate” was established by Christine O’Neil and Vicky Baddeley to tackle loneliness in Cambridgeshire, UK, after receiving a £10,000 National Lottery grant. Around 130 people signed up to its first event in Cambridge recently.

Elizabeth Felton, 25, who attended the event, called it “an amazing opportunity”. She went on to say, “I think it’s brilliant because more things need to happen for people with learning disabilities to give them a chance, to give them hope.”

Ms Felton, from Ely, UK, was born with the rare growth, Beckwith Wiedemann syndrome, and has a moderate learning disability. She said she hoped the occasion would help her find “more friends and relationships”, as well as tackle her depression and anxiety. “I’ll focus all my energy on [the event] and I won’t have time to think about myself,” she said.

Safe Soulmate, which caters exclusively for adults with autism and learning disabilities, is due to run as a pilot for six months after receiving money from the National Lottery Community Fund.

It was set up by Stretham residents Mrs O’Neill, 38, and Mrs Baddeley, 46, who both work with people with learning difficulties. Mrs Baddeley said the response to their idea had been “overwhelming”, with the first Cambridge meet-up being oversubscribed.

“We did a consultation in 2017 and everyone was saying, ‘Hurry up, we need this now’. That was coming from social workers, support workers, and parents who were saying how their children were so lonely,” Mrs Baddeley said.

Luv2meetU
Luv2meetU is another dating agency that was set up to help people with learning disabilities, as the founders realised it can be difficult to meet new friends and get out and about. It’s a friendship and dating agency for people over 18 years of age and the site supports people in helping them make friends, share interests and develop relationships.

Luv2meetU can help people enjoy a range of activities from bowling and swimming, to meals out and visits to nightclubs. They organise events which their members tell them they want, so there’s always something different to try. As well as all the fantastic events that they run throughout the year, they also offer a one-to-one dating service for their members.

Disability Matches
Disability Matches is another dating agency which caters for people with disabilities, including those with learning disabilities. They have created a dating site for people with disabilities, which enables users to quickly join their community and start communicating with other people near to them who understand just what it’s like to be them.

Conclusion
These dating agencies, along with TV programmes such as “The Undateables” have gone a long way to highlighting issues which people with learning disabilities have and are helping people with learning disabilities when they are trying to find love, or even just looking for friendship and companionship. The Undateables TV show follows a number of people who consider themselves ‘undateable’ due to challenging conditions, as they attempt to find love.

Everyone deserves the chance to find and enjoy love and happiness in life, no matter who you are or what makes you different.

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I’ve drawn on my own experiences in the world of online dating, to compile a tried and tested set of tips that will help every would-be dater. These five simple tips, are a must for anyone looking for lust or love online:

1) Don’t say cheese – The importance of your main photo:

Your main photo is the most crucial photo that you upload onto your dating profile and it should say as much about your personality as it does about your face. If you get this photo wrong, you could miss out on speaking to many potential suitors.

The majority of people won’t bother looking at your other photos before swiping left or right on your profile, so you should ensure that your main photo is also your BEST photo. Don’t go all David Brent though, as relaxed shots are often far better than professional, cheesy ones.

2) Looking 50 is great if you’re 60 – Uploading the right choice of photos:

Make sure you upload at least three photos and that they’re recent photos, not photos of you from 10 years ago! Also, make sure your photos show you in a good light. You should be smiling or having fun, but not looking miserable! You should include photos of yourself that are flattering.

Uploading colourful, varied and fun profile photos is essential to creating a great online dating profile. Make sure your photos are representative of who you are.

Upload photos of you glammed up, dressed down, resting and letting your hair down. You should project yourself as a multidimensional person and uploading photos such as these to your profile will reflect this.

If you’re looking for love, not lust, avoid posting photos of your abs, muscles or cleavage (and any other part of your naked body for that matter). Users will think that you’re only after something casual. While it’s clear you are very confident about how you look, you will come across as arrogant. Users may think you are superficial and spend more time focusing on your muscles and cleavage rather than developing other parts of your personality.

3) Better slapped by a truth than kissed with a lie – Creating an honest profile:

Creating your profile is the hardest part when registering yourself on a dating site, but it’s also the most important. You need to make an effort and write something about yourself in your profile, even if it’s just a few lines. If you don’t have anything in your profile, people will think you’re lazy and will think you might be hiding something. Make sure you tell the truth and use words that reflect positivity.

Try to elaborate on your likes and interests. Far too many users use the same old clichés – “I’m sociable”; “I love movies”; “I like animals” – which are inevitably ignored. Instead, think of something interesting that you could add, such as why you’re sociable and in what circumstances; what movies you like and why; and what kind of animals you like and whether you have any. You could also list any hobbies you have and any sports or gym activities that you like playing or participating in. People need to imagine how they would fit into your life, so you should give them enough information to make them want to know more about you.

If you lie about something in your profile such as what you look like, your age, or what you do in your spare time, it’s not a great start and you must remember that the truth will always come out in the end. Ultimately, it will end in disappointment for you both.

4) Someone photographed next to a tiger, lion, or fast car – Don’t come across as arrogant:

This person will come across as arrogant and deluded. They think that posting a photo of them up close and personal with a big cat will vastly increase their sex appeal and desirability to other singletons. How can people sense you are a potential lover if you put up a tiger-selfie?? The general idea is that women love travel and danger, so if a man wants to attract a girl, all he has to do is demonstrate this in his profile picture and they feel that by uploading a photo of themselves with a big cat or a flashy car is the best way to do this!

5) Take great caution when posting photos – Think Safety & Security first:

Do not post photos with your home or work-place in the background, nor pictures of your children or anyone else’s children. Check your pictures before you post them. It’s very easy for someone to find out more about you simply from the photos you post online. You do not want a stalker, nor someone who could use any information they have found about you, to blackmail you, or even harm you or those closest to you!

You can read more about how to create a great online dating profile in my article in Loaded online magazine. My article also provides advice on where to meet someone and how to stay safe on a first date, plus, how first impressions really do count and the difference between confidence and arrogance.

My new book, Love at First Swipe, is a comprehensive guide to modern online dating. It offers tried and tested tips and advice about all important aspects of online dating, including personal safety and the ways to maximise your chances of dating success. It also has specific chapters which look into dating options for disabled people, people of 50 years of age and over, teenagaers / young adults and dating options for Single Parents.

Love At First Swipe is available now on Amazon UK: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1912615460/

It is priced £8.99 in paperback and £3.99 as an e-book.

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Every relationship will have its ups and downs. When things are good between you and your partner, the world is a much happier place. When things are not so good, you’ll feel sad, so it’s important to know how to handle such a delicate and potentially tricky situation.

We struggle in relationships largely because we haven’t learned the essential skills and techniques which influence relationships and enables them to thrive. We don’t have specific training for relationships when we’re younger, so we’re influenced by those closest to us when growing up and not everyone is surrounded by adults who set a good example.

For some people, it takes longer to hone the skills and techniques needed for a healthy relationship. However, it’s often the other person who actually needs help to improve their relationship skills and techniques.

Life experiences also affect how we feel and how we think about certain situations.

As a sidenote, if you’ve been chatting to someone online and you’ve built up a great virtual relationship with that person, it’s not a guarantee that you’ll like each other when you meet them face-to-face, so you should try to meet them as soon as possible, to avoid any potential heartache, as that person may not quite be the same person you had pictured in your mind.

In general, most relationships can be rescued providing you are both willing to talk, listen, compromise and be understanding. Here are my top 3 tips which will help you improve your relationship:

1) Listen to your partner –

Communication is absolutely key in any relationship – and in anything you do in life in general. You might not agree with everything your partner says, but don’t be rude and don’t interrupt them when they’re talking, even if you want to say something. Hear them out, calmly then convey your points of view and see if you can compromise. Something may be said which you didn’t realise was the case, so there may be a genuine misunderstanding. It’s so much healthier to actually talk to one other.

2) Don’t have an ego –

If you let your ego come between you and your partner, your relationship won’t last long. Playing the blame game or wanting to have the last word is not a good idea. Be understanding. It could be that you fear rejection and perhaps you’ve had bad experiences in the past which may have led to you feeling like this. This feeling can also cause anxiety.

3) Be appreciative –

Don’t take your partner for granted. We can get too comfortable in a relationship, but you have to appreciate all the little things they do for you from time to time. Your partner should also reciprocate this appreciation. Showing your appreciation can encourage thoughtfulness between you and your partner and should promote more positive feelings between you both.

For more tips and advice on Dating and Relationships, my new book, Love At First Swipe, is now available from Amazon and from all other leading book stockists.

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