They (aka some meme I saw on the internet) say, “Nothing haunts us more than the clothes we didn’t buy.”But really, “they” should say, “Nothing haunts us more than the clothes we wasted money on because a sales associate pressured us into it.”
Ok, my saying doesn’t exactly roll off the tongue, but you get the point.
Being pressured into a purchase sucks! Here is what usually happens:
You get invited somewhere fabulous and find yourself “needing” a new outfit.
But there isn’t enough time to shop online.
So you head to the mall.
Problem is you’re frantic and frustrated.
So you ask the sales associate for help.
That’s when the trouble begins.
“Try this on. OMG, gurl! Soooo cute. It’s PERFECT for your event!”
Hundreds of dollars later you have your look, but you’re not 100% sold on it. BUT the salesgirl was practically doing a backflip over it, so it must be good.
You wear the outfit, but not with 100% confidence.
After that, the outfit collects dust in your closet. You can’t donate it because dammit you spent so much on it!
Can you relate?
Let’s not do that nonsense again, ok?
In today’s video, I am sharing my tips for avoiding sales associate pressure purchases.
The #1 thing that destroys women’s sense of style, and their lives are what I call roadblocks! Aka the mental muck that we allow to take over our minds.
Today we are talking about Style Roadblocks.
The three roadblocks I am going to share today are based on my own experience and the collective experience of the many clients I’ve worked with over the past ten years.
No matter your size, shape, income, or life experience; on some level we can all relate to these roadblocks.
1.) “My body is too _____”
I can’t tell you how many body-related excuses I’ve heard over the years a stylist because it’s too many to count. Women won’t want to improve their looks until they “lose the weight.” They don’t want to even try shopping because “nothing ever fits me.”
I call bullshit. I have styled women from size 0-24 without any issue.
You deserve to feel good and look good NOW. No more waiting, no more excuses. Tailors exist for a reason, my friend.
2.) “I’m too broke.”
Money can’t buy you style. Some of the wealthiest people in the world look tacky and terrible. Meanwhile, some women exclusively shop at Goodwill who look like a million bucks.
There are so many fabulous clothing options at every price point, in fact, I do some of my best shopping at TJ Maxx.
3.) “People will think you’re trying too hard.”
If I had a nickel for every time, I heard this one. Apparently showing a bit of effort when it comes to your appearance is the ultimate crime.
I get it; people want to look effortless and not like it took a 15 person glam squad to achieve that look.
But at the end of the day, this roadblock is putting other people’s comfort ahead of your own. Change is hard, but it can be even harder on other people who want to keep you in the special little box they created for you.
On a subconscious level, your inner circle thinks if you look too good you’ll move to the next level without them. Maybe you will, and perhaps you won’t, but it’s your life to live not yours.
Well, there you have it, folks! The top 3 roadblocks that hold women back from achieving amazing personal style.
Which roadblock did you identify with the most? Leave it in the comments section below.
The amount of messaging we receive regarding how we should look and what we should wear is insane. In this “everyone is a star” era driven by social media, the pressure to conform, while standing out at the same time, is exhausting.
I’m going to put all of my cards on the table here, if you’re looking for a stylist who gives a shit about trends or if something is “in or out” – I’m not your girl.
The jacket I have on right now is over ten years old – and I got it on sale.
Whether you love the jacket or not, my outfit today still looks current and most importantly, it looks like me.
Think about it; all of the celebrities that are best known for their style (aka style icons) seem to transcend time with their looks. For example photos of Jackie O from the 1960s look just as chic today as they did back then.
So what do those icons have that you don’t?
A signature style.
I’m going to teach you how to get started on developing your signature style.
Step 1: Set Some Goals
Before we even begin to think about clothes, we need to think about your goals. Every season I go through this style development process and what I wear ties directly in with my goals. If my goal is to advance in my career, then I need to focus on my work wardrobe. If I am single and don’t want to be, then the focus needs to be a date-worthy wardrobe.
So what are your goals? Close your eyes, and I want you to envision your goals happening. Picture them going exactly as planned. Now open your eyes. What were you wearing?
Step 2: Identify Your Icons
Now that you can see your bright future, you need a little inspiration to help you get there. Identify at least ten celebrities, influencers, TV/ movies characters, political figures, models … anyone who’s style you admire. Now here is the kicker, their style has to line up with your goals.
Step 3: Get Pinning
Your icons are set, so the next step is to get your imagery all in one place. I use Pinterest for myself, my clients, and all of my Personal Style University members use it as well. Such an amazing tool to stay organized and inspired.
Those first three steps will get you moving in the right direction so start there. I will warn you that step 2 is the most challenging step. It sounds simple, but you’d be surprised at how easy it is to draw a blank. Do me a favor and help each other out by commenting below with your favorite icon. I also have a complete list inside of Personal Style University.
I love it when my work has an impact more substantial than just making women look cute. I mean looking cute rocks, but how awesome would it be to change your family tree with style?
Now we’re cooking with grease.
Know what I’m sayin?
Check out this post from one of my Personal Style University members …
“Personal finance guru Dave Ramsey is fond of saying that learning to control your money can “change your family tree.” I’m seeing that making an effort to look your best can too. I come from a long line of geeks, and my mom wears literally no makeup or jewelry simply because she doesn’t see the need.
After my first run through of PSU, I did a closet cleanse for my kids and started making outfits for them. My daughter has picked up the habit. She’s been so excited to start wearing her jackets. I was walking by the bathroom and found her OOTD hanging on the door.”
That post made my day.
As children, we were never really taught how to style ourselves. We were left to our devices when it comes to this important daily task. I can remember being a kid, and especially when I was a teen, struggling to fit in and accept my appearance.
What if we were taught some basic styling principles early on? How would that affect our self-confidence? How would a boost of confidence impact other areas of our lives?
Some food for thought …
In today’s video, I am sharing some styling tips for teens. I also definitely sound like an old lady! LOL.
“Serious development of the personality begins at the closet door” – William James
Look at William James, the father of American psychology serving up some truth from the great beyond.
As true as that quote is, this is the number one issue I see with so many of my clients. When the going gets tough, the tough cleans out their closet like an unsupervised child in a candy store.
I blame Marie Kondo. Everyone latched onto her “sparks joy” catchphrase and immediately tossed everything from their closet.
So I say Screw Marie Kondo because this is how you set your closet up for success.
Today I am going to share with you:
The secret weapon for cleaning out your closet like a pro – it doesn’t cost a penny and pretty much everyone has one.
The one-sheet that will change the way you shop and get dressed – it certainly did for me.
The thought-provoking question that will change the way you get dressed forever.
Read to begin?
Lesson 1: Your Secret Closet-Cleansing Weapon
The biggest mistake people when cleaning out their closet is going at it alone. I’ve cleansed hundreds of closets throughout my career, and the reason they were so successful is that I was there. I know what you’re thinking, “well duh you’re a stylist.” But that’s not it because I can’t successfully clean out my closet without having a partner in crime there to keep me honest.
So here is your first tip. Never clean out your closet alone! Find your most honest friend or family member and then proceed with the cleanse.
Lesson 2: The Ultimate Wardrobe Checklist
Am I the only one who gets a little high when I check something off of my to-do list? Just me? Ok.
Even as a stylist it took me years to discover the importance of having a closet full of basics that I could mix and match to create endless outfit combinations. Everything in my closet was loud, busy, and if I’m honest with myself, nothing went together.
This is what I want you to do … print out your checklist, grab a pen, your closet cleaning buddy, and get to work. Mark all of the items that you own (and are in good condition) and the unchecked items will migrate over to your shopping list.
This sets you up for shopping success and ensures you won’t get rid of valuable pieces in your closet. We’ll go into styling those pieces later, all of that is covered in Personal Style University.
Lesson 3: Pop The Question
Ok, final lesson in setting up your closet for success … pop the question. The question that changes everything. Ready for it?
How do you want to be perceived?
This is the new “sparks joy.” This magical little question also puts you in the driver’s seat. You aren’t changing your style to be cute; you are changing the narrative and ultimately improving your life.
Do you want to perceived as sexy or powerful? Smart or sassy? Trustworthy and free-spirited?
When you get clear on your answer, this again provides more clarity regarding what stays and what goes during your closet cleanse.
So let’s recap what you learned today …
1.) That your sometimes annoying brutally honest friend or family members is your greatest ally during the closet cleansing process.
2.) Santa isn’t the only who can benefit from a list. The Ultimate Wardrobe Checklist is the start of your style blueprint.
3.) Going deeper by asking one little question will change the way you get dressed.
Believe it or not, this is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to cleaning out your closet (there’s a reason top stylists charge thousands to do this for you.) But fear not, inside of Personal Style University I teach you all the secrets, and I even support you while you clean out your closet inside our private community.
But for now, identify your partner in crime, print out that list, and start asking yourself that magical little question.
Think about some of the most beautiful people in the world and their “before they were famous” photos. Yikes. Am I right?
They were all put through the “Hollywood carwash” aka fancy stylists, hairdressers, makeup artists, media training, etc. by people who learned those skills.
Who is to say you can’t learn those same skills to look like a million bucks?!
Growing up I always loved fashion, but that didn’t mean I was stylish. Honestly, I cringe when I think back on some of my old outfits, but I was determined to figure out this whole looking good thing. And that’s exactly what I did.
Cut to I’m now paid to make people look good.
I’ve spent the past decade and some change working as a personal stylist. I’ve worked with thousands of women to transform their style using five simple steps. Yep, I was turning 7’s into 10’s for a living. Not to brag (okay I’m bragging), but at one point I had 42-person waiting list full of women who wanted to work with me.
Since I don’t have a little army of Lauren’s to style the clients I would never have the time to serve, I re-engineered my five steps to style giving women the power to dress themselves successfully.
Today I’m going to walk you through those five steps:
Step 1: Clear Out The Past
To reinvent yourself, you need to clear out the past – I’m talking the mental muck that is preventing you from showing up as your most authentic badass self, and the actual junk that is hanging in your closet.
Step 2: Develop Your Sense of Style
Once you’ve cleared the decks, and set up a solid foundation, it’s time to rebuild by developing a style that is completely unique to you, your goals, your lifestyle, and your body.
Step 3: Shop Like A Stylist
Contrary to popular belief, most women hate shopping. It’s stressful, and when nothing ever fits, it makes us feel bad about our bodies. Oh, and can we talk about how expensive it is? All of that stress is kicked to the curb when you use the shopping secrets all of the top stylists’ use (including myself)
Step 4: Putting It All Together
You know what you want, heck you even bought it but how the heck do you put Pinterest-worthy outfits together. It’s not as hard as it looks. A couple of tips … 1.) Planning pays and 2.) Outfit formulas will set you up for success
Step 5: Maintain and Evolve
In this final step, we end the vicious cycle of wanting to burn your whole entire closet down after your new clothes high wears off. It’s all about maintaining the clothes you’ve got, reworking them in fresh ways, and evolving your sense of style as your life gets more awesome.
Oh yes, your life WILL get more awesome when you activate these five steps into your life.
If you think about it, your outfits are like your vehicle for navigating life. Every piece of clothing you wear helps paints a picture of your life. The fabulous first date outfit you wore for your now husband. The great suit that landed you your dream job. The right outfit is like wearing a Ferrari; the wrong outfit is like rocking a Pinto.