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We all want better relationships, and when things aren’t quite working out in our relationships, many of us turn towards advice that help us deal with things on the surface. They work for some time, until you go through the same issues again.

What happens on the outside is only a reflection of what’s happening inside of us. Your relationships are a reflection of the relationship you have with yourself.

Having a healthy relationship with yourself means being aware and knowing and understanding who you are, what you like/dislike, who, why and how you love, and more. It’s this self-awareness that will help you become a better partner in your relationships.

It doesn’t matter whether you’re currently in a relationship or just waiting for the right person to come along; now is always the perfect time for self-reflection.

Below are three resources that I use with my clients that can serve as your starting point.

Gary Chapman’s Five Love Languages

Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, and Physical Touch.

“Within the five basic emotional love languages, there are many dialects…The important thing is to speak the love language of your spouse.”

– Dr. Gary Chapman –

Each person gives and receives love differently. My idea of feeling loved, or how I express love, may not be the same as yours, and you will most likely differ from your partner as well.

For example, my primary love language (what I need) is Quality Time, while Neil’s primary love language (what he needs from me) is Acts of Service.

You can take The 5 Love Languages® official assessment here at no cost. It will help you discover your love language profile, which will give you insight on your primary love language, what it means and how you can use it to connect with others.

Helen Fisher’s Personality Quiz

Helen Fisher is a Biological Anthropologist and Senior Research Fellow at the Kinsey Institute. She studies the evolution, brain systems and cross-cultural patterns of romantic love, mate choice, marriage, adultery, divorce, gender differences in the brain, personality/temperament, and a lot more.

Helen created the quiz to “test the degree to which you express four broad styles of thinking and behaving, each associated with one of four basic brain systems: the dopamine (Explorer), serotonin (Builder), testosterone (Director) and estrogen (Negotiator) systems.”

At the end of the quiz, you will receive feedback on three things:

  • your “personality signature” (how you naturally think and behave),
  • whom you are naturally attracted to, and
  • the natural joys and problems that may occur when you connect with someone with a different “personality signature.”

Click here to take the quiz.

Discover Your Unique Love Blocks: 7 Questions To Ask Yourself (Workbook)

A couple weeks ago, I talked about 5 Hidden Love Blocks that might be keeping you from having the relationship you desire.

If you don’t figure out what those hidden love blocks are in your own life,it doesn’t matter how much dating advice you consume. What you need to do is get to the root of what is holding you back. Until then, you won’t get to change your experience of love.

I developed the 7 Questions Journaling Workbook to help you uncover, understand and resolve those love blocks – the destructive beliefs, fears, doubts, insecurity, and unresolved pain that’s lingering just under the surface – and start attracting love from a place of clarity, confidence and strength.

You can download the workbook here.

I hope you find these useful. I’d love to hear your thoughts about these resources in the comments below, and if you have other resources to recommend, please share them as well.

The post Better Relationships: The Power of Looking Inward appeared first on Dating Coach Ané Auret.

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When things aren’t quite working out in our relationships, many of us turn towards advice that help us deal with things on the surface. They work for some time, until you go through the same issues again.

What happens on the outside is only a reflection of what’s happening inside of us. Your relationships are a reflection of the relationship you have with yourself.

Having a healthy relationship with yourself means being aware and knowing and understanding who you are, what you like/dislike, who, why and how you love, and more. It’s this self-awareness that will help you become a better partner in your relationships.

It doesn’t matter whether you’re currently in a relationship or just waiting for the right person to come along; now is always the perfect time for self-reflection.

Below are three resources that I use with my clients that can serve as your starting point.

Gary Chapman’s Five Love Languages

Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, and Physical Touch.

“Within the five basic emotional love languages, there are many dialects…The important thing is to speak the love language of your spouse.”

– Dr. Gary Chapman –

Each person gives and receives love differently. My idea of feeling loved, or how I express love, may not be the same as yours, and you will most likely differ from your partner as well.

For example, my primary love language (what I need) is Quality Time, while Neil’s primary love language (what he needs from me) is Acts of Service.

You can take The 5 Love Languages® official assessment here at no cost. It will help you discover your love language profile, which will give you insight on your primary love language, what it means and how you can use it to connect with others.

Helen Fisher’s Personality Quiz

Helen Fisher is a Biological Anthropologist and Senior Research Fellow at the Kinsey Institute. She studies the evolution, brain systems and cross-cultural patterns of romantic love, mate choice, marriage, adultery, divorce, gender differences in the brain, personality/temperament, and a lot more.

Helen created the quiz to “test the degree to which you express four broad styles of thinking and behaving, each associated with one of four basic brain systems: the dopamine (Explorer), serotonin (Builder), testosterone (Director) and estrogen (Negotiator) systems.”

At the end of the quiz, you will receive feedback on three things:

  • your “personality signature” (how you naturally think and behave),
  • whom you are naturally attracted to, and
  • the natural joys and problems that may occur when you connect with someone with a different “personality signature.”

Click here to take the quiz.

Discover Your Unique Love Blocks: 7 Questions To Ask Yourself (Workbook)

A couple weeks ago, I talked about 5 Hidden Love Blocks that might be keeping you from having the relationship you desire.

If you don’t figure out what those hidden love blocks are in your own life,it doesn’t matter how much dating advice you consume. What you need to do is get to the root of what is holding you back. Until then, you won’t get to change your experience of love.

I developed the 7 Questions Journaling Workbook to help you uncover, understand and resolve those love blocks – the destructive beliefs, fears, doubts, insecurity, and unresolved pain that’s lingering just under the surface – and start attracting love from a place of clarity, confidence and strength.

You can download the workbook here.

I hope you find these useful. I’d love to hear your thoughts about these resources in the comments below, and if you have other resources to recommend, please share them as well.

The post How To Make Your Relationships Better: The Power of Looking Inward appeared first on Dating Coach Ané Auret.

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Do you feel like you’re doing everything that you can on your dating journey but things just aren’t working out for you?

Superficial dating advice seems so simple – if we just do this, or say that, send this message, or wear these clothes, or go to these places or use this app, then things will magically fall into place.

But for many of us, even when we feel like we’re doing everything “right,” it’s still just not happening.

Or we might have a temporary blip of something working out, but we end up back at square one over and over.

In terms of thinking about how we can resolve things long-term and make real, lasting changes, we need to look a little bit deeper.

Today I want to talk to you about five potentially hidden love blocks that are we’re not always consciously aware of and that hold us back in very real ways.

Watch the video below, or keep reading.

5 Hidden Love Blocks That May Be Keeping You Single | Ané Auret Dating Coach - YouTube

If you don’t figure out what those hidden love blocks are in your own life, it doesn’t matter how much dating advice you consume –  unless we get to the root of what is holding us back, we don’t really change our experiences.

5 hidden love blocks that may be keeping you single 1 Ambivalence

Ambivalence is when what you think and say that you want doesn’t quite line up with what you’re actually doing.

For example, you say that you really want to date and you really want to meet somebody, but inside of you, you are actually more committed to your business, or traveling, and only have space to go on a date once a month.

There’s no right or wrong here. Being committed to your business or career is GREAT, but if you are also committed to meeting people and dating, then you have to make time for that too.

At some point, one will take time from the other, and you will have to prioritise which of the two is more important to you at this point in your life.

To some extent, I think we can have it all, but it does take effort and prioritising.

Ask yourself,

Do I want to date? Do I really want to be in a relationship?

How much do I want this?

Do I want this to the extent where I will take some time from my business or travel plans (or whatever it may be)?”

Check in with yourself on where your internal commitment really lies in relation to what it is you say you want when it comes to love, dating and relationships.

2 Unresolved trauma or baggage

Sometimes we’re not so aware of the hurt or pain that we’re still carrying from a previous relationship, or something that else hasn’t worked out in the past.  This may also include childhood trauma or other life events that you’ve not healed from yet.

We think we might have worked through it or resolved it, but unfortunately, we haven’t yet. These triggers come up only when we’re with somebody, and that’s often the time when we realise that we haven’t dealt with things to the extent that we thought we have.

Check in with yourself and what you have been through in your life that you think might still be unresolved.

3 Hidden beliefs or fears

Do you have a deep fear of rejection? Are you afraid of being vulnerable and letting others know you or see you for who you really are? These are very valid, and very real fears that I think most of us struggle with.

Even when you’re in a long-term relationship, there are no guarantees that you are not going to feel these things. There are no guarantees that you are never going to feel misunderstood or lonely, or not completely seen and accepted.

These hidden beliefs or fears may cause you to sabotage yourself, procrastinate on getting out there and making connections, or sabotage a potentially good connection, among many things.

A lot of these things are relationship dynamics that we’re not always aware of, so just something to keep in mind, that these could be a hidden block for you right now.

4 Control

Wanting to always stay on top of a situation might be one of the things that are holding you back.

This is something that I often hear from my clients.

So much of dating and relationships require you to take risks, let go, surrender, and give yourself over to so many things out of your control and potentially your comfort zone. There’s so little that we can control in life really, aside from taking responsibility for our own choices and thoughts and behaviors.

When you’re in a dynamic with another person, we can’t control their behavior or decisions, because that’s not a healthy relationship.

If you are somebody who’s struggling to give up control and feel like you need to control every step of your dating journey and how it’s developing, and you want to set the pace it will be worth reflecting on why you need this to be the case and explore ways of how you can let go.

5 Availability vs Approachability

Just because you’re single and available, and you’re out there, doesn’t mean that you are seen as easy to approach or easy to talk to.

What you need to be mindful of here is whatever energy you are projecting to the outside world, make sure that it’s saying “It’s okay to talk to me. It’s okay to make a connection with me.”

Be conscious of your approachability, not just your availability.

So, what hidden love blocks are potentially present in your life? Is it ambivalence? Do you have hidden fears that you need to face, or realities you need to come at peace with? Do you need to focus on coming across a bit more approachable?

Remember, that this is a journey, and changes don’t happen overnight.

Just start with one block, then move on to another.

Take small, consistent steps until you overcome each of them.

Until next time,

The post 5 Hidden Love Blocks That May Be Keeping You Single appeared first on Dating Coach Ané Auret.

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Is it time to schedule in an annual Mid Year Review the same way we do at the end of the year? As the days and weeks are flowing into one it feels like I’ve blinked and the first half of 2018 has gone…how did this even happen!

With it being the 2nd week of July it struck me that in 6 months’ time we’ll be waking up to lots of “New Year’s Resolutions” and promises to ourselves to make 2019 “Our Best Year Yet,” and commit to finally doing the things we’ve wanted to do.

And then I thought,

“Am I really where I want/need to be? Doing the things I want to do, and living my life in the way that makes my soul happy?

Am I being the best version of me? (I had to say ‘no’)

Am I living the highest vision I have for my/our life? (Again, ‘no’ and ‘not yet’)”

Painful, but a work in progress, and that’s ok. I’m ok with that.

How often do we take the time to just stop for a moment to reassess where life is going, what we’re really busy with and whether we’re actually on track?

To check in on whether we’re going in the direction we want to, instead of being on autopilot, rushing from one day to the next, just ‘getting things done’… that’s certainly how I’m feeling today.

I love having these conversations with my clients too – and recently I’ve been so inspired by some of their reset plans!

It usually goes like this around June/July time:

“If we were to speak on x-date in December, what would you tell me about the last 6 months?  What would’ve happened?”

Then on a more practical level, we start making plans, get things in diaries to make sure they happen, and we simply work backwards from there. So fun and so exciting!

It Starts on the Inside

But as with most things the real ‘reset’ needs to happen inside first, because just adding more things to your endless to-do list is actually the opposite of what we’re trying to do.

Today I’ll spend some time reassessing and resetting. For me that means:

  • meditating,
  • journaling, and
  • reviewing and planning the next 6 months.

Here are some of the questions I’m thinking of – and I invite you to join me to take some time for yourself and reassess/reset in your own way, especially those parts of your life you know in your heart have been left behind or stalled a bit, and that need your time and attention.

For me,  I’ll be focusing on Relationships; Business, and Health & Fitness.

2018 Mid Year Review: Questions to Ask Yourself REFLECTING on it
  • What were the best moments / days / highlights of my year so far? What can I be celebrating?
  • What/who am I most grateful for right now, and how can I show my appreciation?
  • What situation/person/relationship/ circumstances are causing me pain, discomfort and/or doubt?
  • What/who do I need to let go of to help me move forward?
  • What has been working for me?
  • What has not been working for me?
  • What do I need to START doing?  What do I need to do more of?
  • What do I need to STOP doing? What do I need to do less of?
  • What’s been the most important lesson / discovery of 2018 so far?
  • What have I learnt about myself so far this year?
  • Where am I out of integrity?  Where am I out of alignment – where are the gaps/discrepancies between what I think, belief, say and do? This one question can probably answer almost all one the above.
PLANNING it
  • What do I want to look back on at the end of 2018?
  • What/where I am ready to transform over the next 6 months?
  • What do I know, in my soul, has been stopping me up to now?
DOING it
  • What do you know you can/need to do that will have the biggest impact over the next 6 months? Pick 3 key things, focus, plan and schedule what you can. 

Example: Relationships – 3 key things, Business – 3 key things, Health & Fitness – 3 key things

BEING it

So often we focus on all the things we need to get DONE, which is of course super important and absolutely right that we do so, but what’s actually more important is who we are BEING and BECOMING in the process.

So here are 2 questions to check in with:

  • Who am I becoming?
  • What do I have to believe about myself to have what I want, and to receive what I want?

Let’s do this together!

If your year so far has been a bit ‘meh’ and you’re still not where you want to be, there’s time – let me know how you get on x

Have a beautiful day and a fantastic week!

As always,

The post 2018 Mid Year Review – Reassess & Reset appeared first on Dating Coach Ané Auret.

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As the days and weeks are flowing into one it feels like I’ve blinked and the first half of 2018 has gone…how did this even happen!

With it being the 2nd week of July it struck me that in 6 months’ time we’ll be waking up to lots of “New Year’s Resolutions” and promises to ourselves to make 2019 “Our Best Year Yet,” and commit to finally doing the things we’ve wanted to do.

And then I thought,

“Am I really where I want/need to be? Doing the things I want to do, and living my life in the way that makes my soul happy?

Am I being the best version of me? (I had to say ‘no’)

Am I living the highest vision I have for my/our life? (Again, ‘no’ and ‘not yet’)”

Painful, but a work in progress, and that’s ok. I’m ok with that.

How often do we take the time to just stop for a moment to reassess where life is going, what we’re really busy with and whether we’re actually on track?

To check in on whether we’re going in the direction we want to, instead of being on autopilot, rushing from one day to the next, just ‘getting things done’… that’s certainly how I’m feeling today.

I love having these conversations with my clients too – and recently I’ve been so inspired by some of their reset plans!

It usually goes like this around June/July time:

“If we were to speak on x-date in December, what would you tell me about the last 6 months?  What would’ve happened?”

Then on a more practical level, we start making plans, get things in diaries to make sure they happen, and we simply work backwards from there. So fun and so exciting!

It Starts on the Inside

But as with most things the real ‘reset’ needs to happen inside first, because just adding more things to your endless to-do list is actually the opposite of what we’re trying to do.

Today I’ll spend some time reassessing and resetting. For me that means:

  • meditating,
  • journaling, and
  • reviewing and planning the next 6 months.

Here are some of the questions I’m thinking of – and I invite you to join me to take some time for yourself and reassess/reset in your own way, especially those parts of your life you know in your heart have been left behind or stalled a bit, and that need your time and attention.

For me,  I’ll be focusing on Relationships; Business, and Health & Fitness.

2018 Mid Year Review: Questions to Ask Yourself REFLECTING on it
  • What was the best moments / days / highlights of my year so far? What can I be celebrating?
  • What/who am I most grateful for right now, and how can I show my appreciation?
  • What situation/person/relationship/ circumstances are causing me pain, discomfort and/or doubt?
  • What/who do I need to let go of to help me move forward?
  • What has been working for me?
  • What has not been working for me?
  • What do I need to START doing?  What do I need to do more of?
  • What do I need to STOP doing? What do I need to do less of?
  • What’s been the most important lesson / discovery of 2018 so far?
  • What have I learnt about myself so far this year?
  • Where am I out of integrity?  Where am I out of alignment – where are the gaps/discrepancies between what I think, belief, say and do? This one question can probably answer almost all one the above.
PLANNING it
  • What do I want to look back on at the end of 2018?
  • What/where I am ready to transform over the next 6 months?
  • What do I know, in my soul, has been stopping me up to now?
DOING it
  • What do you know you can/need to do that will have the biggest impact over the next 6 months? Pick 3 key things, focus, plan and schedule what you can. 

Example: Relationships – 3 key things, Business – 3 key things, Health & Fitness – 3 key things

BEING it

So often we focus on all the things we need to get DONE, which is of course super important and absolutely right that we do so, but what’s actually more important is who we are BEING and BECOMING in the process.

So here are 2 questions to check in with:

  • Who am I becoming?
  • What do I have to believe about myself to have what I want, and to receive what I want?

Let’s do this together! If your year so far has been a bit ‘meh’ and you’re still not where you want to be, there’s time.

Next week I’ll share with you some of my insights and plans – and I’d love to hear some of your yours too.

Have a beautiful day and a fantastic week!

All my Love,

The post 2018 Mid Year Review – Reassess & Reset appeared first on Dating Coach Ané Auret.

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‘Poor Jen’ cant keep a man. Divorce number 2 under her belt and, despite all her Hollywood success, she just cant get it rightwhen it comes to relationships.

If you feel a bit Jennifer, you are not alone.  But, you can unlock the secrets to a successful, lasting relationship and avoid becoming another divorce statistic like the former Friends star.

When the headlines about Jen and Justin broke recently it was sadly no real surprise. Celebrity couples have the odds stacked against them. Recent research by The Marriage Foundation found that celebrities were 50% more likely to separate within a few short years than the average UK divorcee.

These are faceless statistics in the light of divorce being one of the most devastating experiences a person can go through – celebrity or not.

But this is Jen’s second divorce and follows on from numerous reported short term relationships. There are more than celebrity divorce rates being stacked against her here.

The Friends’ star has been called ‘unlucky love’. Less kind reporters have written: ‘Poor old Jen, why can’t she keep a man?

Even though we can’t possibly know the truth behind the break up of her latest relationship, one thing seems very clear: Jennifer Aniston either struggles to find the right man for her or doesn’t know the secrets to forming a lasting relationship – or both.

This, is not an A-list problem.

As a Dating and Relationship Coach I work with many women who are ‘getting back out there’ after a big breakup or divorce. I help them through their own healing process and to get ready to date again. Many of my clients have married after a string of short term unsuccessful relationships. Some have seen marriage as a solution to the serial dating disasters or short term failures they have experienced for most of their adult life.

I don’t judge these women – mainly because I was one of them. My first marriage ended in disaster and, through my work, I now understand that it was destined, maybe even inevitable to do so. I wasn’t ready for love and my pattern for picking men that were not right for me was deeply ingrained in my psyche.

I didn’t think anything was wrong; I was just ‘unlucky’.

How wrong could I be.

My own journey saw me on the floor – literally – after my divorce. All I could think was: ‘Why me?’ I had no problem attracting men but time and time again I could not develop the attraction into a meaningful, lasting relationship.

So I stopped and took a long hard look at the underlying issues. I researched the keys to successful relationships and unlocked secrets to dating success. I became so passionate about what I discovered that I quit my job and re-trained as a Dating Coach. Last year I won Dating Expert of the Year.

Many of the women I work with may not be celebrities on Jen’s level, but my clients are high-profile, strong, smart and successful women who do not in any way identify with the ‘unlucky in love’, ‘poor Jen’ or ‘desperate divorcee’ stereotypes.  They have success in other areas of their lives, but for one reason or another they don’t have that success in their love lives.  I help them figure out why.

Some are hindered by their own professional success that may be overshadow that of their now ex-husband.  Some have outgrown their first marriage because they’re taking their lives and careers to the next level.  But as one of my clients said to me this week – “if women like Jen or Kylie can’t find a love that lasts, what chance do I have?”

It’s hard to avoid the deeply personal questions around our own value and what we seem to be doing to ‘fail’ at yet another relationship when things go wrong. But I know through my work that we can all have the relationship we want and make a success of it.

I am now happily married again, but when I got divorced in my mid-thirties it truly was the most painful time of my life. I could not see a way out of that abyss. Even now, I would say it’s almost impossible to do this without a little help.

It’s no surprise, then, that many of my clients come to me and have already decided that they will never get married again.

But developing a new relationship – one that is 100% right for us and our life – can change all that and a second marriage can become a real opportunity for lasting success. Of course it’s important to realise that a second or third marriage (or even a new long term, committed relationship) will face challenges that weren’t present in a first marriage. It’s all about having the right Relationship Toolkit.

It may be early days for Jennifer but there is no right or wrong time for when you should get back ‘out there’. If you are thinking of dating again after a painful divorce or break up, here are the powerful lessons I’ve learnt through my own experience and from working with my clients.

Six steps to breaking the unlucky in lovecycle, getting back out there and avoid becoming another statistic:
  1. Are you date ready’ or ‘relationship ready? Work out the difference!

As you may well know, the dating scene is in no way an even playing field. Sometimes you won’t know whether you are ready or not until you actually start getting out there or seeing someone new.  But I also know for sure that there are many people who are dating that are certainly not ready for a relationship. Being ready to date and being ready for an actual relationship are two different things altogether

I know of people who move on really soon after their divorce and turn their next relationship into a new ‘mini-marriage’ – often while the legal process and all the fallout of their divorce is still going on. While there can be exceptions this is really not the best start for a new relationship.  A rebound relationship or the first post-divorce breakup can often exacerbate the unresolved pain someone is carrying and hurt just as much. By all means get out there and have fun, but don’t date with a view to finding The One until you have taken a long hard look at what went wrong last time.

  1. Get clarity about what your next relationship will look and feel like

At the time that I met my second husband, I was absolutely heartbroken that I didn’t have a biological family of my own, and I didn’t know how I really felt about becoming a ‘stepmom’ to his two boys.  Since he already had two children, I wasn’t sure about whether he would want any more, while I still had hopes of becoming a mom. I was certainly not at an age where I felt I could spend a few years figuring it all out.  Regardless of how I felt about him at the time, I had to have some serious upfront talks about our future together before I could get involved with him at all, and I’m so glad I did because it avoided a huge amount of misunderstanding and unmet expectations later on

So much of what leads to relationship and marriage breakdown has to do with us carrying unhelpful or destructive habits, patterns and beliefs about love, intimacy and commitment from one relationship to the next without taking the time to figure out what is really going on underneath the surface. But taking the time to understand yourself and how you really function in a relationship, what you truly need and how to ask for it will set you up for success in your next relationship.

  1. Take responsibility for your part in your relationship or marriage breakdown

One of the key signs of being ready to move on to dating or a new relationship is when you can calmly and without blame get to the point of accepting your part in the breakdown of your marriage.  This can be exceptionally hard to do, especially if the reason for your divorce was an extramarital affair or various kinds of unreasonable behaviour concerning somebody other than you.

When you get to the point of having a neutral attitude towards your ex you will have made a huge amount of progress and they will no longer have the emotional hold over you and your new life that they once had.  This also puts you in a much stronger position in your new relationship.  The other side of this particular coin is practicing forgiveness, for our ex-partner, but often for ourselves as well.

  1. Use your baggage for good

Once you’ve been through a divorce there are things that will never be the same again.  We all have baggage in some way, and I believe it can be a good thing – but only if we’re aware of it and we’ve dealt with it in a constructive way.

Being in a new dynamic will push your buttons and trigger you in ways that you can’t predict.  What I’ve learnt is that when a marriage breaks down, it isn’t entirely disconnected from the reasons our relationships prior to the marriage broke down either. And if you are still carrying unresolved issues from your part relationships that may have spilled over in your first marriage, it will come up again.

Something I’ve learnt in my second marriage is that I often assumed there were a problem between me and my husband, while on reflection it was very clear that we were projecting unresolved issues from our past relationships onto each other.  We would have the same kind of arguments over and over that were actually not about us at all until we figured this out.  We had to teach each other the new rules of our relationship over time and stop comparing or competing with our pasts.

One decision we’ve made, for example, is to never use the word or threaten ‘divorce’, no matter how heated an argument may get. It’s simply not allowed and we both know that it’s not an option.

  1. Prioritise your healing

Everybody deals with it differently, but family breakdown and divorce is a traumatic experience and the impact of it should not be underestimated, no matter how strong you as an individual.  The mental health impact of a divorce is well documented and in cases where there is a high level of conflict, or for example the process of extracting yourself from a marriage to somebody with Narcissistic Personality Disorder can lead to Post Traumatic Stress Disorder for some.

Allowing yourself to go through the various stages of grief can also be very difficult when you’re a single parent trying to keep everything together for everyone else with little time and space to process your own feelings.  Even when it feels impossible at times, find a way of prioritising taking care of yourself in a way that can help you move forward in small steps.  Whether it’s exercise and taking care of yourself physically, reaching out to friends or seeking professional help, do whatever it takes. Healing can feel like a big word and it is. Ask friends for help if you need to. They can be helpful to keep an eye on the way you prioritise yourself – or not.

  1. Take your time to rebuild your life and thrive on your own first

This is about much more than just getting ready to date and perhaps getting into a new relationship or marriage. Your long term relationship or marriage breaking down may be the worst thing that has ever happened to you and you may doubt yourself and your ability to ever find love again.

But in time you may come to see it as one of the catalysts in your life that spurred you on to finally do the things you always wanted to do, revive lost dreams and follow your true passions.

If you allow it to happen you may reinvent and redefine yourself in ways you never thought possible.  The conflict and stress of keeping an unhappy marriage together, for whatever reason, takes its toll.

Once you’ve drawn a line and are able to move on a new phase in your life can open up and it is possible that you may be happier than ever before.

This I know for sure.

[ENDS]

The post 6 Steps to breaking the ‘unlucky in love’ cycle   appeared first on Dating Coach Ané Auret.

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