Better After 50 Magazine | An Online Magazine for Women Over 50
We are Better After 50, because we choose to be. Midlife Women talk about sex after 50, divorce, reinvention, fashion, menopause and more. We are better because we have each other; we are willing to share our experiences, our learnings, our concerns and our musings.
Our first big laugh (at ourselves) was when we entered the exhibit we realized this wasn’t a show about overnight camps, but out being campy and what that means and where this camp movement stemmed from. And, it turned out to be the best afternoon at Camp I can remember.
Susan Sontag had written volumes about what “camp” is. “It’s not just style, or vision, it’s “a vision of the world in terms of style — but a particular kind of style. It is the love of the exaggerated, the “off,” of things-being-what-they-are-not. “
Stuff that is Camp includes performance art and literature and ballet and opera and clothing. It’s Judy Garland (who serenaded us during the show). It’s garish and over the top and exaggerated and that’s why this exhibit was the perfect place to play with my girlfriend. We entered a magical fantasy world, that felt playful and childlike and spent an afternoon imagining dressing up in the world’s best closet. It was liberating to look at the out of the box fashions and imagine wearing them (or not).
We embraced all that Camp can serve up that afternoon as Camp is generous and non-judging enjoyment, it’s Carmen Miranda and Versailles and Gucci and McQueen. It’s feminine and frivolous and outrageous and silly. And so were we.
Camp is creative inventive and a real movement that we know about but have not fully understood as something we could define. But now we can. and hope to visit Camp more regularly in our own lives.
From the House Of Moschino. This Dress is about Opera, and Ballet and Layers of Art. Can You Feel it?
These Dresses are By Chloe and Lagerfied (1984) and How Amazing is This Display/
Camp is Judy Garland and Black Swan Feathers and Hollywood. Dress by Alexander McQueen.
Versace and Chanel “Camp” style looks. Camp is about going too far. But is this really going to far? I would wear those black sleeves on the right, the top and the skirt would you?
Upside down or right side up — We would wear either.
These tasty smoothies can beat bloat, help you lose weight, and keep hunger pangs in check.
Banana. Peanut butter. Cocoa powder. Milk. Ice cubes. Yogurt. Done. While this swirl of chocolate-peanut butter goodness sure does sound enticing, who are we kidding: Sometimes our DIY smoothies might as well be a double fro-yo order with milk chocolate malt balls for all the calories and added sugar they pack in.
Smoothies can absolutely be a part of your strategy for healthy, lasting weight loss—if that’s what you’re after—but only when done right. (Otherwise, consider them slurpable desserts with a health halo around them.) Nutritionists agree that incorporating a nutrient-dense smoothie into your daily diet can help avoid pound creepage by keeping hunger levels in check and even promote weight loss thanks to their filling fiber and muscle-building protein. To find out their go-to slimming sippers, we tapped top R.D.s for their favorite recipes.
Before we get into those, let’s chat about weight loss for a minute. A perfect smoothie will not magically make you lose weight. In fact, no one thing is going to do that—at least not in a healthy or sustainable way. If you want to lose weight (and not everyone does), you have to also address a range of other factors that play important roles: sleep, stress, hormones and and other medical issues, to name a few biggies. Only by looking at weight loss from a holistic point of view can you really home in on a healthy goal, effect meaningful change, and see sustainable results. For some people, weight loss in and of itself might not be a healthy goal. If you have a history of disordered eating, you should consult a doctor before making any changes to your diet.
Now, whether you’re looking for help on your road to weight loss or just want some delectable smoothie inspiration, read on, and dust off that blender.
1) Pumpkin Powerhouse
“In the fall, I love incorporating pumpkin into as many of my meals as possible,” says Rebecca Lewis, R.D., in-house nutritionist for meal-kit delivery service HelloFresh. “What gives pumpkins their gorgeous orange color is the antioxidant beta-carotene. This nutrient is helpful in slowing down aging in the body.” Did we mention pumpkin is a rich source of vitamin C? With only 49 calories, a cup of cooked pumpkin boasts 3 grams of fiber—great for filling you up without weighing you down.
1 cup pumpkin puree (canned or fresh)
1 cup unsweetened vanilla almond milk
1/2 frozen banana (adds creaminess and sweetness without added sugar)
handful of ice cubes
dash of pumpkin pie spice (swap for cinnamon if you don’t have this)
“The Green Sunrise Smoothie has everything you need to start your day right,” says Alexandra Miller, R.D.N., L.D.N., corporate dietitian at Medifast. “You’ll get a healthy dose of omega-3 fatty acids and essential vitamins and minerals to keep you healthy and strong while losing weight.”
Greek yogurt aficionados, rejoice. This creamy, decadent smoothie is also a nutrient powerhouse with the addition of chia seeds and berries. “This super simple smoothie is packed full of protein and fiber to crush cravings and keep you feeling satisfied for hours,” says Erin Palinski-Wade, author of Belly Fat Diet for Dummies. The omega-3 fatty acids in the chia seeds help reduce stress hormones and decrease inflammation, and the berries are packed full of antioxidants, she adds.
1 cup plain Greek yogurt, unsweetened
1 cup frozen berries (blueberries, strawberries, or açai berries make great options)
1 tbsp vanilla extract
1 tbsp ground chia seeds
1/2 cup ice
Blend all ingredients together and enjoy.
4) Spicy Tropical Greens Delight
“Capsaicin, the active ingredient found in peppers, acts as a mild metabolism stimulant,” says Julieanna Hever, M.S., R.D., C.P.T., a plant-based dietitian and author of The Vegiterranean Diet and The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Plant-Based Nutrition. “As an added bonus, pineapple has a diuretic effect which helps the body get rid of retained water.” (Read: Bye, bye, bloating.) Did we mention how good all the phytochemicals, vitamins, and minerals found in those greens are? Yeah.
1 cup frozen mango chunks
1 cup frozen pineapple chunks
1 1/2 unsweetened coconut water
1 cup leafy greens (baby spinach, kale, collard greens, etc.)
1/4 cup lime juice
1/4 tsp cayenne pepper (optional)
Blend all ingredients together and enjoy. (Note: This recipe yields about two servings.)
5) Vanilla-Berry Blast
Vending machine cravings, meet your match. “At just 250 calories, this refreshing and delicious smoothie is packed with 18 grams of protein and 5 grams of fiber to keep you satisfied and to keep energy and blood sugar level on an even keel without crashes,” say Lyssie Lakatos and Tammy Lakatos Shames, R.D.s at The Nutrition Twins. The rich and creamy sweetness of this smoothie is especially great to satisfy a sweet tooth if you’re trying to avoid consuming extra calories from unhealthier options. “Plus, the berries contain the phytochemical C3G that may increase the production of both adiponectin (which enhances fat metabolism) and leptin (which suppresses appetite),” they add.
1 quart plain nonfat Greek yogurt
8 ounces unsweetened frozen strawberries or blueberries
2 cups unsweetened vanilla almond milk
1 banana, frozen
1 tsp cinnamon
Add half of each of the yogurt, berries and milk into a blender and blend until smooth. Add the remainder of the ingredients and blend until smooth. (Note: This recipe yields about three servings so either refrigerate for later or pour into three glasses and share!)
6) Spirulina Smoothie
Say hi to spirulina. This exotic-sounding blue-green algae readily available in powder form at health food stores is well worth befriending. The low-calorie superfood is brimming with nutrients and is an easy slip-in for your next shake or smoothie bowl. “A 500 mg serving contains just 2 calories, allowing you to pack your body with nutrients while saving on calories,” says Lisa Hayim, registered dietitian and founder of The Well Necessities and TWN Collection. “The protein in spirulina is also easily digested and absorbed, making it easier to build lean muscle, which helps the body burn more calories and fat throughout the day.”
1/2 cup coconut water
1/2 cup almond milk
1 scoop vegan vanilla protein powder (optional)
1 tsp spirulina
Blend all ingredients together and enjoy.
7) Belly-Busting Berry Smoothie
Here, creamy banana melds together with metabolism-boosting berries (blueberries and raspberries contain the flavonoid anthocyanin, which is associated with lower glucose levels, fewer cravings, and increased metabolism) in a simple shake that’s as filling as it is tasty. “The nut butter provides healthy fats and protein to keep you satisfied for a few hours and keep blood sugars steady,” explains celebrity nutritionist Lisa DeFazio, author of The Women’s Health Big Book of Smoothies and Soups. “This prevents mindless snacking on high-sugar, high-calorie foods that contribute to weight gain.” Bonus: Thanks to banana’s high potassium content, this shake helps crush bloating.
1 cup almond milk
1 cup frozen berries (strawberries, raspberries, blackberries, etc.)
I should be happy to be back in the land of plenty. Our sailboat is docked in Fort Lauderdale, Florida, in the good old USA, just a few blocks from one of the nicest beaches in the state. It is hot; hot as hell actually, but we have the air conditioning running. The water is plentiful here at the dock, so I can let water stream over my head as I shower- I have not done that in over 6 months. I can surf the internet, call my kids and friends on my cell phone, stream movies, watch Season 8 of Game of Thrones, and leave the lights on to my heart’s delight.
Within a few miles from our boat, there are numerous CVS stores. There’s a Trader Joes (be still my heart). There’s a dry cleaners nearby and a nail salon on every block. There’s Uber, whose drivers will take me to a place where I can buy Sabra hummus, Face yogurt, or my shiny silver hair stuff. The six washing machines and dryers at the marina are always empty, the office has quarters, and the directions are completely understandable. Down the street is Mexican food, pizza, sushi, oysters, Capital Grill, and Seasons 52. Everyone speaks English. The money that is accepted is the American kind.
I am in the land of plenty. So why am I so sad?
I thought I would be happy (at least for awhile) back where
things are easy (notice I did not write, “free and easy”), and yet I find I miss
my days of un-plenty. I miss them
I miss being anchored in a secluded harbor, pointing out a
turtle that has popped his head out of the water.
I miss deserted islands and beaches.
I miss skinny dipping, and showering off the transom.
I miss my friends being only a few boat lengths away.
I miss hanging out with women who, like me, have no fingernails and unexplained bruises up and down their legs.
I miss exploring new lands and new cultures.
I miss dolphin shows in the middle of nowhere.
I miss simply “making do.”
I miss walking around a new island looking for a place to
buy ice cream.
I miss gin and tonics that we make ourselves and sip as we watch the sun go down at 6:30 PM, which coincides with cocktail hour (and not a late dinner).
I miss going to bed before 9PM, when it is pitch dark.
I miss the moon at sea. I miss the Milky Way, Jupiter, and picking out Scorpio where my friend taught me to look for it.
I miss playing games at night.
I miss simplicity, serenity, living as part of nature.
And yet…this is a time of transition- a transition towards what I yearned for often while at sea–being with the people I have loved for a very long time, and who love us, and rejoining my original community. It is a transition to spending time in an area where my memories were made and cemented, where everything is familiar and comforting; to being Home, despite the fact that we have no home.
The culture here in southern Florida is not my culture; the values here are not my values. I have no community, so it is no wonder that I am not happy. We will soon be on our way north, where we can hug our friends and family, catch up, and be a presence in their lives, while we live in nature. I know that this will make everything better.
But until then, with over a 1,000 miles still to go in the
transition phase, it looks like I’m going to need some major retail therapy.
Luckily, I seem to be in the right place for that.
Do you have
questions on how to start new love relationships after 50? Are you ready to
meet someone new? You will find useful tips on how to introduce your children
to a new partner, or how to be more confident with your appearance, and other essential words of
wisdom on what to do in a new love relationship and how to avoid conflict.
If you’ve lost your
spouse or got divorced, it is always hard to move on and start your life from
the very beginning. No matter how hard it is, you should stay positive to enter
a new relationship with hope. A lack of confidence should not block you from
opening your heart again. Starting a new relationship will take a lot of
investment and enthusiasm. Work on your determination not to limit any area of
your life. Many people in their 50s complain that they feel uncomfortable about
looking for a new partner and some of them do not even try. Why do you want a
new partner? Knowing precisely what you want will help you feel surer.
Many mature people
do not know where to go to meet a new partner. Do not forget that you can use
your computer and find the top
adult dating websites in the world. It is the place where you can
find your love or new friends to have a good time together in a real or virtual
Using your life experience
and what you want from life will help you stay positive. Positive and confident
people are very attractive no matter the age. You had time to learn many things
in life and to get many experiences. Know both your strengths and limitations.
Start a new relationship with patience, kindness, and faith.
When is it better to encourage intimacy?
It is a big mistake
to hesitate and wait for the right moment. If your new partner makes you feel
happy, just let it go a little and enjoy your lucky situation. Do not feel
ashamed. Only you are responsible for your life. Feeling embarrassed about your
body will not help you either. Do not feel nervous about your appearance. To be
in your 50s gives you the advantage, which is your experience and confidence to
know what you want. Just admit that your body has changed with age, but it will
be the same with your partner.
Discuss everything with your partner
Once you start
living with a new person, you should not avoid discussing everything with each
other. Avoiding certain subjects will make you feel confused. Everything that
bothers you should be put on the table for further communication. Share your
worries with the person you love. Before having sex, you should not feel
ashamed to discuss any health problems. If you are nervous about a health
issue, it will be challenging to relax and really enjoy your intimacy.
Thinking about your common future
People who are
happy in relationships always go with the flow. They put faith in their union,
their partners, and the belief that in times of change, they will be together.
Ask yourself if you are ready to spend the rest of your life with this person.
There is no need to set boundaries with each other.
As practice shows,
people who are in their 50s, they put less pressure on ‘progress’ in their
relationship. It is the youngest who is in tension in new relationships. With
age, such assumptions are quite rarer. You will be surprised to know that
mature couples are much more open-minded and relaxed. You can discuss whether
you will live apart, together, or get married.
Introducing your children
It is essential to
talk to your children before the moment you introduce your new partner. Do not
worry about how they will react. If your children love you, they will be happy
to see your smiling yes. Make the first meeting less stressful where they will
not have to talk a lot. You can go to the cinema together. Your children will
appreciate it if you tell them about your plans in advance. Before to have
dinner at home, you can go for a walk together. Respect your children and give
them a bit of adjustment time.
Let them see how
happy your partner makes you and always try to let them form their own opinions
of him or her. In time they may ask you all the details, and you will have the
chance to tell them all about how lovely your new partner is. If your children
are grown up, there is no need to hide anything from them. Most probably your
children will be supportive and positive. Remember that if you are happy, this
will make your children feel happy too.
Start your new
relationship without any rush. Take your time to learn about your new partner.
Make sure that you do not step back because of fears or lack of
self-confidence. Love your life as it is, love yourself, and open your heart to
love. Being mature is your most significant advantage.
“Gray hair, don’t care!” seems to be the mantra of the gray hair movement that is blowing up social media. Strong and stunning women all around are embracing natural aging and so should you! So chic and so confident, these instagram icons are making way for change as they share their silver hair lifestyles. Here are the top gray haired women of instagram that you need to follow immediately!
Beauty and style expert, author, and self proclaimed gray hair powerhouse, Nikol Johnson Sanchez is a true icon and the perfect blogger to be inspired by on instagram. Not to mention her youtube videos share her personal gray hair journey along with all of her amazing tips.
Lifestyle blogger and award winning author, Annika is one online media influencer you definitely want to be following! Her family oriented, fabulous life is inspiring to see her achieve with a head of beautiful silver hair.
Embracing her beautifully natural head of gray hair, Silvina is one to watch. Model, actor, and yoga student, she lives a well balanced, healthy lifestyle that she continues to share openly with the world. Her authenticity is truly inspiring!
This gray hair blogger is not only a fashion icon, international model and business woman. She has made her place in the gray hair movement with other 35k followers and her secrets to age defying beauty and grace.
This “age attitude adjuster” is redefining old age ideas one blog at a time. She is an influencer to all 50+ women seeking the confidence and carefree zen to achieve silver hair and the best version of yourself yet. Her positive and lively outlook are sure to brighten your media feed.
On a cool spring night, throw open the window, turn on the ceiling fan and crawl under the covers in these cozy PJ’s. The truth is there is no perfect fabric to deal with your internal temp fluctuations which are unique to Menopause but at least you can give it a good start with breathable fabrics or loose fits.
Men’s Inspired sleepwear that is loose, baggy and light. Chances are you may throw off your sleepwear from sweats in the middle of the night anyway but at least when you crawl into bed, you can start with breathable fabric that feels cozy.
Contrast piping outlines classic menswear-inspired PJs that pair a feminine swing top with soft, fluid pants to complete the set! These PJ’s are the ultimate comfort meets cute for bedtime!
Vintage cotton. J.Crew’s preppy signature style makes perfect for these sleek, stylish, and sophisticated PJs. Your sleepwear will be just as fashionable as any other piece in your wardrobe, plus the amazing comfort.
Modal Fabric (It’s made from beech treesWhen it’s time to relax, reach for these comfy lounge pants cut from cool, breathable stretch modal in an easy straight-leg silhouette. So chic and flattering, these PJ pants are a necessity!
This PJ doesn’t seem as breathable but it’s a good way to start the night. (this PJ you most likely you will throw off). These silky satin pajamas will have you feeling beautiful before you even get your beauty rest. Light, airy and loose-fitting, this PJ set will have you feel as comfy as ever.
Invest in a Burberry and you will have it for years. We love this Burberry Frankby 18 Quilted Jacket. The quilted jacket with bold, wooden buttons adorning the pockets and closures adds a unique charm to a classic black jacket. The material will keep you warm at any beach side dinner or brunch.
Try a classic leather jacket, but with a new twist with the BlankNYC Faux Leather Moto Jacket. The fitted Moto jacket in a muted beige turns every look you pair it with into a high-octane look. Perfect with jeans or black culottes and work pants.
Classically update your wardrobe this spring with the Madewell Denim Jacket. Perfect for any shape or size, the dark wash denim jacket with rollable sleeves creates the perfect silhouette when pairs with any outfit. The glistening and felled seams make what is supposed to be a plain jacket, into a stand alone piece.
Combine your work wardrobe and your trendsetting style with the TopShop Chuck on Blazer. The easy open front and clean line blazer give the silhouette of a blazer, but the drapey effect of a warm cardigan. It’ll allow you to transition from work to play in the most effortless way.
It may seem like our long coat days are over, but just in case they are not, the Bernardo Crepe Oversize Car Coat will be the perfect companion. The oversized, stylish coat with top stitched hems and selected seams allows for an easy, breezy, spring look.
Jazz up and improve the look of a bland yet classic denim jacket with the Madewell Denim Southlake Military Jacket. The high neck, tie front jacket allows you to combine all the stylish aspects of a denim jacket and a military jacket flawlessly.
Though it may seem a little young, the new, and current style of the Cupcakes and Cashmere Soft Utility Jacket is going to be your new favorite jacket this season. The edgy style of the utility jacket mixed with the soft fabric and waist cinching jacket makes this new style 100% worth it.
Bring about all the style and flare of a leather jacket, but give the style and update with the BlankNYC Textured Cotton Moto Jacket. The rich grained leather and fresh mesh insets at the shoulders and waist allow the jacket to stand out. It’ll keep you warm and have you looking amazing.
Whether you are rushing out to lunch, running errands or just hanging at the house, it’s great to have a fun easy piece to throw on that feels feminine and fresh. These pieces are hip, casual and affordable and will give you a lift.
These fabrics and looks are easy and light to wear. Check out these pieces from Madewell, Eliza, Equipment and more. !
No matter the season, solid colors are always a good idea. Block colors provide a great alternative. The Eliza J Crop Jumpsuit allows you to rock a new pattern with style and flare. If jumpsuits aren’t for you, try the Gibson X The Motherchic Sonoma V Neck Woven Peplum Top or the Something Navy Front Button Fitted Top. One allows you to flow into any occasion with cinched waist and light ruffled hem and sleeves. The other comes with trendsetting sleeves and a stand out color. The top is complete with buttons down the front. Both would be beautiful for work or weekend plans.
Polka dots are just as fun, without all the busy-ness of a typical floral piece. Polka dots provide an engaging alternative that is sure to still wow any onlookers that may spot you this season. If you’re going out, you’re going to want to try something like the Cecelia Garden Geo Ruffled Jumpsuit. The tie waist jumpsuit with ruffled sleeves and frill trim bodice creates a flattering silhouette. Channel the new pattern simply with the Equipment Layla Polka Dot Silk Camisole. The sweet yet sophisticated v neck tank will take care of every date night outfit.
A choice as classic as florals, deserves an equally as classic replacement: Stripes. The summery pattern that is perfect for tops, pants, and dresses is all you’re going to want to wear once you’re tired of your same old florals. Try the Chelsea28 Stripe Faux Wrap Crop Jumpsuit for a stand alone piece to wear to all your favorite occasions, or the Caslon Tie Hem Top to wear with jeans or pants.
Whether it’s a good pattern, or a good fabric, both are important to survive the upcoming heat. You need to feel your best and look your best at all times. That’s why linen anything is in your best interest this season. The soft, breathable fabric will allow you to to experience summer in a whole new way. The J Crew Point Sur Paperbag Stripe Linen Pants with bold block stripes and vintage inspired waist will look amazing with any white blouse. The Boden Nancy Linen Midi Dress is a flattering wrap dress with ruffed neckline and flounced hem wouldn’t be complete without your best, strappy sandals.
If you’re lucky enough to have sisters – you may have asked yourself what’s different between a sister and a girlfriend? A lot. After sharing more than 5 decades with my 3 sisters I consider myself an expert.
This past weekend one of my sisters came to visit for 4 days and we were thrown back into our childhood bubble. We had no interference from husbands or kids – it was just us. I was hosting this visit and had purposely cleared all plans so we could just “flow” from what-ever to where-ever.
Here are 11 things that I was reminded of during this visit that are uniquely special about sisters:
Sisters Can Be Perfect Playmates: My sister and I love to do a lot of the same stuff because we were raised like a wolf pack with our dad as the alpha wolf–competitive tennis matches, make way for duckling style bike rides, group downhill and x-country skiing treks and hiking trips plus plenty of boating. My sister arrived with her bicycle, tennis racquet, yoga and walking clothes — we used them all!
No Food Stress: There is no standing on ceremony when it comes to food and no guilt when you haven’t made it to the grocery store in preparation of the visit. Neither of us need to plan meals ahead of time. We can whip up a meal from what’s in the pantry and the veggie bin. One night, my sister pulled together a fantastic pasta and pesto dish with roasted cauliflower and a cucumber and tomato salad – it was simply gourmet.
Free flow schedules: We didn’t care what time we ate dinner or when we played tennis – or even how long we napped. We were in sync. House projects like rearranging furniture and organizing cabinets are considered fun activities vs chores. We spent hours hanging little lights on my porch – climbing up the ladder and discussing “the look” and both of us had a blast. “Sister Decorators” – does that sound like the next reality TV show?
Shopping with confidence: There is no holding back on opinions about whether or not to make the purchase. No purchase was made without approval from both of us. You never know, it could be the next outfit you may want to borrow.
Mia closet es Su closet: Boundaries around what’s mine dissolve with sisters. Because my sister and I have almost the same shoe size, look good in the same colors and have similar taste – the door to the closet never closes — for better or for worse.
Never bored talking about the same thing – our mom, our dad our 2 sisters and our relatives. Commiserating about our childhood is still riveting. No matter how many times we tell the same stories – they are still fun.
When we argue about stuff we can rebound. But, we are more mindful of hurting the other’s feelings than we were in the past because we know how precious this sisterhood is. Part of growing older is we are kinder. We’ve learned not to take one another for granted.
We actually listen to stories about each other’s kids as though they are our own because in fact they almost are – they are slightly removed from our own.
We get to laugh hysterically about our parent’s best and worst traits without getting offended because it’s OUR parents so it’s allowed.
Getting under the covers together is not weird – we are sisters and tucking under the same blanket to watch a movie or sleeping in the same bed is normal.
Honesty: Sisters actually tell you that the outfit you are wearing looks bad and that it’s time to dump the t-shirt or sweater and get a new one. We are not insulted by this.
I could go on and on with this. If you’ve got some more #sisterlove thoughts you want to share please comment below.
If you have sisters –Hope you will share this blog with them and spread the #sisterlove.