Our big, multiracial crew attracts attention. Two white parents and four Black children. It's obvious our family was built by adoption which intrigues many. The kids, stair-stepped in age, also garner attention for their looks and personalities.
Stepping out in public means knowing that we will probably be approached by a stranger for some reason.
This isn't automatically a bad thing.
Adopting transracially is serious. It requires an immense amount of preparation, dedication, and ongoing education.
As a mama of four, it's hard for me to get away. There are so many amazing adoption conferences and camps, but most of the time, it's not realistic for me or my family to attend.
Therefore, I get a lot of my transracial adoption and parenting education from face-to-face
One day, I'd had enough.
You know what I'm talking about.
My kids had been playing around on their beloved i-Pads. As the battery life drained, I told them it was time to put the i-Pads away.
You would have thought I told them Christmas was cancelled forever.
There was some sobbing. Some complaining. Begging for snacks RIGHT NOW. Sibling arguing. Whining.
And this happened every
Slavery and Juneteenth are HARD topics. Thus, many parents do not want to broach them with their children. And there's the argument to be made that we can over-emphasize parts of Black history, including slavery and Civil Rights.
Black children shouldn't be subject to only learning about the hardest parts of history; but we shouldn't avoid the topics either. And let's not forget that ALL
Summer break starts in just a few days (!!!) for our family, and this year I'm ready to roll! Because when you have curly-headed, melanin-rich kiddos, it's best not to just slather any ol' sunscreen on their skin or rely on big-box store swim caps.
If you know anything about me, you know we prefer to live as non-toxic as possible. We also prefer to buy products from Black-owned small
I was once there.
Brand spanking new to adoption. Completely consumed by new-mommyhood. Diapers. Bottles. Nighttime feedings. Pacifiers. Medical appointments.
I had big ideas and no experience.
And here we are, twelve years and four kids later. A lot of time. A lot of experience.
I spend a good part of my day, every day, talking to families-by-adoption and fostering. In
In our home, we learn about Black role models and Black history year-round, as it should be in your home, too. Because Black excellence (gasp!) isn't limited to MLK Day, Black History Month, Kwanzaa, and Juneteenth. (Two of the four are rarely acknowledged in society anyway.)
Teaching your children about Black excellence doesn't have to be complicated, though I understand it can be overwhelming
And just like that, I had a tween daughter.
And just like that, I had to up my connection game.
Understand, a tween has a lot going on. She is caught between the child years and the teen years. She might be mature one minute and temperamental the next. Puberty is in full-force. Tween years are confusing and exciting. And you may find yourself wondering how in the world you will navigate
Informing (and empowering) your child that he or she was adopted from the very first day the child comes to you is important, and so is talking to your child about race. But the big question I get from parents is HOW?
This is a valid question. After all, race conversations can be overwhelming, uncomfortable, and uncertain. If you don't racially match your child, how are you qualified to
Our adoption education wasn't great. I'll be honest.
I thought the agency we had chosen would enlighten us. Prepare us. Give us Adoption 101.
But I was wrong.
ALL of our education initially came from our determination to self-educate. We met with families who had adopted, we read books, and we talked (a lot) about adoption. Then came the experience of being parents. As the years went