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I’ve been talking about sharing some Tinder dating stories for a while now, and after comparing notes with Brighton Girl, now seems like just as good a time as any (you should check out her Tinder diaries over here).

There have been many Tinder dates over the past few months, but the one that will forever stick in my mind is with a guy I shall affectionately call ‘Latex Man’. Most of my unsuccessful dates end up with a nickname, much to my friends’ delight and I’m afraid his is rather a spoiler.

We met for a casual drink after work, and halfway through the second round, he started telling me about what he liked to do at the weekend. Namely, dress up in latex, go to fetish clubs and get involved in what can only be described as a fellatio human centipede. Now, for those of you that know me in person, you’ll know I’m incredibly open-minded about this kind of thing, and I really admired his honesty, but at that point I couldn’t really see where I fit into that equation, so we finished up our drinks and I headed home.

Date number two was with a guy who got nicknamed ‘the runner’. This one fell on a Saturday night, again just for drinks (as let’s face it, no one wants to be stuck for an entire dinner with someone you might not get along with). Five minutes in, I knew we had zero in common and to be honest, it just wasn’t going to go anywhere. The fact he kept trying to buy me Zambuca shots (despite me continually turning them down) an hour after meeting him wasn't the greatest selling point.

I thought I’d be polite and stay for a while, so got us a drink and halfway through a conversation he leaned in and tried to kiss me. I gently put my hand on his shoulder to stop him and at that point, he took great offence, turned his back on me and proceeded to down the rest of his drink. Two minutes of silence later, he said ‘I’m just popping to the loo’, stood up, and...then walked out the front door of the bar never to be seen again. Good times.

Tinder dates are a minefield at the best of times, but not to be deterred, I carried on swiping. At this point, ‘Jack’ entered the scene.

Jack and I never actually met in person, as pretty quickly it was established that Jack was actually a male prostitute touting for business on Tinder. Clearly Jack missed the memo, but if you’re after a hookup, Tinder is a pretty good place to start, so I’m not sure he was having much luck finding new clients. Poor Jack.

Thankfully after that, there were some more ‘normal’ dates. They haven’t quite renewed my faith in online dating, but the cynic in me might just be proved wrong, you never know.
Probably not though.
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Before I bore you all senseless with a few posts about my recent trip to Canada, I wanted to apologise for the rather lengthy break in blog posts. And social content. And generally just not being present for months on end.

Early this year, I ended my long term relationship. It wasn’t an easy thing to do, it wasn’t pleasant and I’ve pretty much changed my entire life to try to make sense of it. For a long time, I was fine. Probably too fine in fact (and according to my friends, I was WAY too fine). Then I crumbled. My work life was beyond stressful, I had to pack, move house; I started dating again for the first time in nearly 9 years.

I went from feeling positive and fine to barely being able to get out of bed. I cried at work. I cried on the train home from work. I pretty much cried non-stop. And I’m really not a crying kind of gal. I suffered from bouts of anxiety that left me unable to breathe. I drank, I smoked, I ate bad food, I ate no food. Looking after myself wasn’t exactly high on my agenda, so you can imagine where blogging sat.

I have some wonderful, amazing friends (and family) who have no idea how much they helped me. Those nights when they just came and sat with me while I cried. Or managed to make me laugh for the first time in days. Without them, things might be looking very different right now.

Writing about makeup and food and my life just hasn’t been possible for the past few months. The creativity I usually feel got completely stripped away and the thought of sitting down to write left me completely blank. I felt like a shadow of my previous self.

The past few weeks have been different. Like I’m turning a corner. I’ve seen three of my all-time favourite bands play, I’ve been seeing someone who makes me laugh and smile genuine smiles again and I’ve travelled to both Canada and Turkey in the past month. The Canadian trip had been planned for ages so I could see my brother (the lucky shit) who lives in Vancouver but turned into a bit of a journey of self-discovery and healing. And the Turkish holiday not only showed me I can be brave (going paragliding when you’re terrified of heights is not the one) but also that taking risks (like going on holiday with someone you only met a few months ago) can sometimes be well worth the reward.

I want to get back to blogging regularly but I can’t promise it will be all beauty related. I’m not quite sure of the direction I want to take it right now, but I’ve realised it needs to be more of the things I love – music, food, beauty – in order for it to be truly fulfilling.

If you’re still here after such a long break, thank you. It really means a lot. I’m hoping to get some more posts up over the next couple of weeks. See you soon!

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