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I was talking to an old friend of mine the other day who I’ve known since we were kids. In the last couple of years he has gone from being a full-time primary school teacher, to teaching three days a week plus a bit of sports coaching. His stress levels have plummeted, his energy has sky rocketed and he’s living a lifestyle with his family that nourishes them all.

It’s another great example of what I think of as nourishing lifestyle design. It’s awesome to see dear friends make those choices and create life the way they want it.

I have a friend in the States, Billy, who works 7-8 months of the year as a landscaper, then packs his life into a bag every December and travels the world for three months doing art in far flung places with locals and children to promote environmental awareness. He’s visited 60+ countries and place most of us will never get to. Lots of people look at him and wonder how he manages it. “Lucky guy”, they say.

I have an endless string of clients who now work 3- or 4-day weeks (often earning the same money as before) and people look at them too with envy. One of these clients, based in the UK and working in a very traditional industry, initially didn’t believe it was possible, even though she really wanted it. In the end, she never looked back.

No, this kind of change doesn’t just happen.

Every one of these people worked out their own special formula for styling their week and making it work practically and financially. It took some time and tinkering, but it came together.

And it takes lots of brave moments – starting with even deciding to live a bit (or a lot) outside the norm or convention.

Or what your parents think you should be doing. Or your friends who aren’t as brave as you. Or your boss/brother/girlfriend who is secretly terrified of change (even other people’s).

It takes lots of brave moments – starting with even deciding to live a bit (or a lot) outside the norm or convention.

Brave moments are when you hand in your notice – typed and ready to go – or inform your boss you’d like to go to a 4-day week. Or the moment you decide to pull out of your MBA. Or start your PhD.

It’s about taking the plunge. Asking her out or even just sending that first message. Asking for a price on that property you’ve hankered after for ten years. Sending that bunch of flowers. Telling him he’s the one.

You can’t know what’s going to happen once you decide something, ask for something or take any kind of action. You can only take that step and see where it takes you next.

Bravely stepping each time, and in turn, making your life great.

May your life be great.

Karen x

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Over much of the course of my life, New Year’s resolutions have had the effect of leaving me feeling pretty useless, disappointed or plain old cynical. They seem like a really good idea at the time. I have all in the gusto in the world for them. I do lots to get started – or at least I think I did. Off with a hiss and a roar.

So what the hell happens between then and the end of the year? What kind of black hole did all my good intentions and actions plans fall into? And, how come I somehow manage to feel that some of them weren’t that important after all? (Or at least that’s what I tell myself).

It defies logic. And it defies all the self-help and motivational books and people out there who tell you how amazing your life is going to be once you’ve set out your resolutions (and hopefully signed up to their course/book group/FB group/etc etc to boot).

I‘m here to tell you that it’s not about resolutions for your year.

It’s about intentions for your LIFE.

Here’s a simple example that has come up with a lot of my clients lately:  

Example: I want to work a 4-day week  (Yes! I’m a big fan of this goal)

New Year’s Resolution: To be working a 4-day week by March.

Action plan: Start delegating more. Ask my boss. Brainstorm what I want to do with my day off. Organise my days better. Start half an hour earlier for the month of Feb to help me get on top of things.

Sound alright to you? Maybe the extra working time in Feb isn’t so great, but they’re sensible, relatable and relevant steps.

But.

What is wrong with this picture?

Several things:

At a practical level –

In this case, my sense is that the timeframe is very likely to be too tight. For most people at work, there are many facets to trimming your working hours back, and time is needed to do it properly. And besides, depending on the kind of work you do, it may be terrible timing to try to do this in the first quarter of the work year. (BTW, you don’t have to wait for a new year to make these calls. You have 365 opportunities a year to wake up and decide how you want to live.)

Some action items are not specific enough – I’m sure I don’t need to spell this out for you clever beings.

It’s not really about ‘Ask your boss’, it’s about ‘Engage my boss in my new role design’. Make it a great business case too. And if you’re the boss, this is about getting the people around you performing so well you don’t need to be there. Oh yeah …

And also it has an overall feeling of being too much, too daunting, and maybe it’s not likely to happen in the end.

This missive is not so much about this practical stuff and I’m not going to get into it too much, but here’s one note on do-ability: Once your action steps are written, check – on a scale of 1-10 where 1 is impossible and 10 is totally doable – how do these action steps feel?

If it’s not 8/10 or higher, revise your actions, make them easier, then check again. It might mean you need to allow another two months to get something done. Don’t worry about it. Getting it done later at a more realistic date is WAYYYYY better than what most people do which is never get it done at all. Make it real.

More here on – Why our HUMUNGOUS GOALS give us the willies [and what to do about it].

The choice to work a four day week is much more than a work goal – it’s an act of revolutionary lifestyle design and an act of love.

But what else is wrong with this picture?  It’s about what’s happening at a human level …

What’s better than setting a goal around your work hours? Setting an intention around how you want to live your life.

The choice to work a four day week is much more than a work goal – it’s an act of revolutionary lifestyle design and an act of love. Your choice says: I choose to design my life to feel good for me and allow me to spend time on the things that matter – to me.

In Elizabeth Gilbert’s words (from Big Magic) – create whatever causes a revolution in your heart.

When you see this choice through the lens of lifestyle design and love (of yourself), and actually really start to vision the life you really want to be living, you naturally start to make fresh decisions and take new actions. You don’t have to motivate yourself, because you innately just want to do stuff that helps you get this life you want.

You don’t look at those actions like someone who’s just been talked into a crazy plan they now have to go through with, turning them all into a bunch of seedy ‘shoulds’.

You take actions like a man who’s just seen the edge of the desert after forty days of crawling in the heat, and you go for it. You do what needs to be done (probably a little less desperately than the dehydrated nomad!) but with the same sense of forward movement; no hesitation or questioning, because you know that’s the only way forward. It’s your way.

(Check out Making your bucket list a reality for more on that sense that it’s just what you’ve gotta do because it’s how you want to live).

Your intentions

So, what are your intentions for your life this year? How do you want to be living? What really matters to you – outside of all the everyday, normal life stuff that’s going to happen this year anyway, whether you set any goals or not?

Who do you want to be?

And why is it important to you? Why does it matter?  (This is the desert question – the man dying of dehydration is one-focused on getting out of the desert and to water. What is your one-focus? Freedom? Contribution? Creative expression?)

Answer this, and then see what actions or goals might fit. But start with your intention and what really matters.

Then you don’t have to drag yourself along, trying to stick to your plans. They will carry you and it will flow, because you are on purpose.

It’s not about resolutions. It’s about what kind of revolution you want to have in your life.

Onwards, revolutionaries …

Karen x

P.S.  If you haven’t already downloaded your FREE Summer Revolution Life Review Kit, check it out now. It’s a brilliant way to look at where in your life you might want to have a revolution.

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If you’ve been following this series of three posts on making time for transformation, you’ll have no doubt in your mind now about how I feel about, well, making time for transformation … I rate it big time. (Read Part One here and Part Two here). But as well as making time for this in our lives, what else do we need to factor in? Here I share some of my learnings around what being on a journey of transformation can mean and require. Call it a cheat-sheet for what to expect and look out for.

In this instalment:
Only you can make your journey important (and therefore prioritised)
Be okay with not being ready
Transformation takes time – and the pace will vary

Only you can make your journey important (and therefore prioritised)

I think we can find ourselves waiting for life to make this ‘finding time for me’ business easier and we might think, once the kids are at school, once work calms down, then I’ll do it. And you may have noticed, it somehow never comes! Or when it does, something else turns up to take up space.

Whether you can feel that you need to work fewer hours and have more time to yourself in the week, or just want a more regular timeslot for meditation, the only person who can really make that happen is you. And when you really own what is right for you, often the logistics start falling into place. That’s partly because the people around you respond differently when you are so internally aligned with your needs and stand in your own knowingness.

People will say to me – Well, I have to work to keep up with the mortgage payments, you know? Or I need to be home with the kids. Or I need to do these longer hours at the moment, the business is going through a lot of change. Now, sometimes this is the reality, so for a time it is the best call or a necessity. But often what they’re really saying is –
That other thing (mortgage, kids, staff, employer) is more important than me, or
I value the business over myself, or
My need to feel needed/important is stronger than my desire for growth.

You get the idea.

The thing is, you are important. And getting to the point where you have an embodied sense of this (not just an intellectual concept of it) and really KNOW IT – that’s part of the process of really taking space for you and your growth as a person.

The power of readiness

In the early days of my private practice, one of my biggest learnings as a coach was around the powerful role readiness plays in how we grow. Being an eager and enthusiastic practitioner of change, I assumed that when people reached out to me – or got their husband/wife/employee/ brother to call me – that the person was ready to change their life and do the work required. I soon realised that was not always the case. We’re all moving at our own pace with our own levels of preparedness for change.

And it’s okay if you’re not ready. Honour yourself by honouring that.

However, don’t mistake some trepidation or resistance for ‘not ready’ because that’s not the same thing. It’s normal to be ready and excited and scared about embarking on personal growth. Just don’t let the fear stop you.

Readiness sometimes follows a wake-up call where we face some harsh circumstances or have the sh#@ hit the proverbial fan, so to speak before we will take the plunge. Gabrielle Bernstein once said in an interview, “People have to hit a hard enough bottom to wake up and say, I’m really ready to do this… and you can’t deprive people of their ‘bottom’; they have to have that experience naturally.”

If you do find yourself hitting bottom, don’t berate yourself for that. Celebrate that it has woken you up, and wrap yourself in a warm blanket of compassion as you take the next step.

Personal transformation is not a Tinder date –

no one said it was fast or easy –

but it also doesn’t have to be slow, laborious or full of suffering.

Transformation takes time – and often has its own pace

Even when you are ready, and even chomping at the bit to finally let go of old patterns or emotions, it can take time. It’s not because it actually has to take a long time – I’ve experienced profound change or guided others through profound change in a matter of an hour, sometimes even minutes – but because there is usually a collection of patterns, beliefs and parts for healing that each need their day in the sun. One of my clients put this succinctly just last week when he said “Yeah, you might be targeting one thing, but you’re never really working on one thing.”

Some of those parts won’t arise straight away and can take weeks, months or years to rise to the surface for healing. It still amazes me what I uncover in myself that I had worked on around the edges for some time – thus paving the way – that then comes right to the surface, ready for deep, extraordinary and lasting change.

I find that each of those parts come out when they are the next aspect that needs growth for you to move forward, when it feels like a safe space to do so, and when we the adult self is ready to do the work. A client recently said to me, “I can feel my teenage-self trusts me now to heal this old stuff, and I think now that I’ve met you, she also trusts you to guide us.” Beautiful.

For me, I had been ready for quite a while, but my deepest healing came when I found someone to work with who could totally hold the space for me, see me in my full potential before I could see it myself, and who had the ability to guide me expertly and safely. Then anything is possible!

If you do find yourself hitting bottom,

don’t berate yourself for that.

Celebrate that it has woken you up, and wrap yourself

in a warm blanket of compassion as you take the next step.

It’s good to bear in mind that you can speed up and slow down the process to some extent. Sometimes it gets slowed down somewhat because our schedule, work commitments or budget only allows us to have, say one coaching session a month for a while. At other times we might be in a position to have more frequent sessions and therefore do more work, faster. If I find I have some rather uncomfortable stuff arising for healing that I don’t want to be marinating in for too long, I will sometimes have a couple of sessions close together so I can attend to those parts more quickly, and sometimes I’ll have a few sessions close together – weekly or twice weekly for instance – because I want a bit of acceleration.

Personal transformation is not a Tinder date – no one said it was fast or easy – but it also doesn’t have to be slow, laborious or full of suffering. It might involve some emotional moments and upset because the body needs those emotions expressed and released – but in my experience, it is just that – a release and not a place we need to wallow in.

A friend recently said to me how she wished she’d done her recent healing work about speaking up for herself ten years ago. We can probably all relate to that, but I also see it as all in perfection; those inner parts of her that had learned at a very early age to keep quiet and not use her voice have now come forward for healing when she is in a place in her life she can do that lovingly and with the support she needs. They can safely step out of the shadows and help her start becoming more of her magnificent self.

Here’s to you too, becoming your most magnificent self.

Much love,

Karen x

PS.  This post is part three of three. Catch Part One here and Part Two here – On Making Time for Transformation.

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Text message received from friend last month: “Wahoo! Congrats, girlfriend. So very delighted for you!” This was in response to my text saying I’d had a client book a really great piece of work with me that I was really excited about. And what a buzz to share it – and with someone who knew what it meant to me and what it had taken to achieve. Celebrating progress feels good. 

A few years ago that same friend and I had dinner together to celebrate a small financial milestone I’d achieved, having paid off a business loan. It was just one financial step (not in the millionaires club yet!) but it was progress. And it also wasn’t about a flashy dinner, it was about marking the occasion with a good friend and honouring the progress I’d made.

It feels so good to stop and celebrate for a moment. It allows us to more fully reap the rewards of our efforts.

It helps us stay connected to our sense of worth and capability.

It fills up our tank, so when the going gets tough at any time, we have some reserves.

It increases our satisfaction in life.

It teaches us to celebrate progress, not perfection.

And celebrating progress and tracking what we’re achieving is just as relevant to our smaller day to day to-do lists, as it is to our bigger goals.

It teaches us to celebrate progress, not perfection.

Experience more completion day to day

I talk to so many people who find it hard to switch off from work and/or feel overwhelmed at the end of their work day by everything they have yet to do – even though they’ve been working their butt off all day and getting loads done.

Because of the pace and complexity of life these days, it’s so easy to get to the end of the day more aware of all the things that still need to be done, than of those you’ve achieved – and even more so when you’re interrupted and need to deal with unexpected items that aren’t on your original to-do list for the day. It’s hard to go home feeling chuffed with your day and enjoy putting your feet up when that’s going on.

And here’s another thing: so many of us work in a virtual world of electronic communication that means we’re often not even touching the work we’re doing each day and that really dilutes our sense of achievement. Here’s what I mean …

Take yourself back 150 years and imagine you’ve recently settled in your home country. You’re a pioneer and a day’s work for you at the moment is ploughing land, planting and harvesting. Today it’s been potato harvesting and you’ve been working the spuds out of the ground, helping bag them into sacks, load them onto the wagon and lead the mule over to the barn.  

What do you have to show for it? Aching muscles in your arms and back. You can see the dirt under your fingernails and can probably still smell the earth. You can see the turned field. You can see the pile of potato sacks. You’ve had boiled spuds with butter for dinner.

You’re having a full sensory experience of the work you’ve done today. You can feel it.

 

Contrast that with preparing a document at work – perhaps a report, proposal or letter. It might be brief or it might be 30 pages long. Let’s say you’ve completed it, saved it in PDF format, attached it to an email and sent it off.

It’s done and gone.

You may not have even printed it, held it and stapled or bound it. With one click of your mouse it is gone and you’re on to the next thing.

Where is the moment you get to look at it, hold it, even smell the printed paper and feel the completion?

When completing something is so fleeting and intangible, is it any wonder we don’t have a great sense of completion these days?

  > TIP

Stop. Take stock. Notice all the good stuff you’ve achieved (even if it wasn’t on your original to-do list for the day). Take a few minutes at the end of your work day to write down what you’ve achieved that day – this turns it into a more full and felt experience as you physically write it down, see it, reflect on it and feel good.  Capture – What did you get done? What are you particularly pleased to have achieved?

Plus, notice when you hang up from a customer having solved their problem; feel the satisfaction of that. Pause to enjoy the feeling of handing over a parcel or document to someone; feel the completion.

Track activity and results

Just before I turned twenty I had been working with a personal trainer at the gym to help me strengthen my back and get a bit leaner. I moved towns that summer and left that gym and eventually got out of my routine. Several years later I looked back at photographs of my 20th birthday party (80’s disco theme, no less) and realised I pretty much had a washboard stomach – for the first and last time! I hadn’t been keeping track of what I’d achieved or how my body had changed, and didn’t realise how far I’d come. I kicked myself for not being more aware – and maintaining what I’d achieved. I’d kept up my activity but not tracked my results.

It goes the other way too – focusing only on results is not ideal either. When I’m working with sales people around tracking progress, they often say how disheartening it is when there are a lot of irons in the fire, but nothing over the line yet – particularly when the only hard measure of progress by the company is actual sales. I recommend they focus on the actions they’re taking as much as the sales they’re making. Noticing what they’ve put in place helps them see the progress and to feel better. Why does that matter? Because when we don’t feel good, we don’t do well. It’s rather chicken and egg, but I have experienced it time and time again. When I feel good and acknowledge what’s working, more of the good stuff comes. I’m sure you’ve noticed that too.

  >TIP

So, as well as tracking sales, track how many calls you’ve made and what other actions you’ve taken. These are the things you can control. Obviously if you’re making plenty of calls and still not getting enough sales, the question becomes ‘how am I making those calls?’ so you can tweak and fine tune your approach.

If we only strive for perfection we will live empty lives because we are chasing a ghost.

It’s not about perfection

If you have A-type personality tendencies and constantly strive to be the best, you may be tempted to chase perfection. I know this. I am a recovering perfectionist. The trouble with perfection is that it’s so unreal. It’s your mind’s concept of what attaining some kind of ultimately acceptable standard is. It’s a game the ego plays to make us feel good enough.

I recall from years ago an old university friend of mine, Ana, standing in her flat and showing me her ‘perfect’ (her word) shelf arrangements that she’d spent the weekend working on – an array of ornaments, house plants etc. I stood there momentarily blank faced and inwardly stunned as I saw the perfectionist dynamic at play – and what an illusion it was. I’d visited another friend earlier that week who had a beautiful inner city apartment with floor to ceiling shelving across one wall. I had a moment of insight where I could see what she would see if she was looking at Ana’s quirky shelves – and I don’t think it was perfection!

They had different tastes of course, and yet they both liked creating a nice home space which is great. As long as we keep it in perspective. And as long as we don’t keep chasing ‘perfect’ long after we’ve created something good for ourselves or it will be a case of ‘how long is a piece of string?’

We all have our own very particular idea of what ‘perfect’ is. So, how do you know it’s perfect? You don’t. Your mind will tell you it is, or it will tell you it isn’t. If we only strive for perfection we will live empty lives because we are chasing a ghost.

On the other hand, when we track progress and the signs of change, we are tracking our journey and growth, and seeing our efforts coming to fruition.
We get to enjoy each step we take and each milestone we make.

  >TIP

If you are currently working with a coach, or working to changing a habit, actively improving an area of your life or learning a new skill, be sure to track your progress every few days. I do this at night when I get into bed, with a notebook and pen handy to make it easy. Ask yourself – What has been working well today? What signs of progress have I seen or felt? What am I pleased with?

Plus, take time to celebrate wins with your team. It’s easy to gloss over the good stuff and dive into the next challenge on the list before you’ve taken a breath. Half the reason this happens is because we forget what we’re doing it all for – and some of that is the reward and satisfaction of achieving the goal or helping a customer; essentially making a difference in some way. I can’t tell you how often I hear staff say that they’ve barely finished one project and it’s on to the next, and no one seems to give a brass razoo for the effort they’ve gone to. Did anyone notice what I did this month?! Don’t be one of those managers!

Stop. Smell the roses. Celebrate your wins and your on-the-way-to-a-win’s. And help those around you do so too.

Karen x

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So perhaps you’ve just read Part One of On Making Transformation, and you’re thinking How do I actually start making space for this? I find getting the logistics sorted around having time for yourself can be just as game-changing as getting your head around it!

In this instalment:
How do you make space?
Let’s make it okay to spend money/time/resources on personal + professional growth 

How do you make space?

As well as the ongoing nature of personal transformation, what we do daily (or at least weekly) has a profound role to play in our growth. I was humbled recently when I read Snatam Kaur, American musician and author raised in the Sikh and Kundalini Yoga tradition, describing her morning practice. She says “it takes about two and a half hours to complete, or about one-tenth of a day. I remember Yogi Bhajan saying that if we give one-tenth of our day to God, God gives Himself or Herself totally to us for the rest of the day.” Her practice includes a wake-up routine, a recitation, yoga, chanting, prayer, and more. Talk about making space. It could make spending 20-30 minutes on your meditation seat seem rather crummy! And YET, that 20 or 30 minutes is profound compared to not sitting at all.

These small practices can help you to start making more space for your own growth – and what I increasingly think of as your ongoing journey towards your most authentic self.

1 – Quiet 5 – breathe, ask – what do I need to know?

The smallest thing you could do in your day is to make more space for tuning in – to take what I call a ‘Quiet 5’. Simply sit somewhere comfortably where you won’t be disturbed and bring your attention to your breath. Sometimes good ideas or important things to remember can come to mind, so having a notepad and pen nearby to capture these can be helpful. At other times I might ask my unconscious mind, higher self or the Divine for guidance with a question I’m seeking answers to. In any case, it’s five minutes of quiet time for tuning into whatever is important for you there and then.

2 – Journal

Simply writing down what is coming to you can be a profound practice – and it’s a very different mental and emotional process to just thinking about it in your head, so don’t underestimate it. Capture what insights you’ve had from a book, or a great experience you had with someone today that was a signal that your approach has changed or your sense of self has strengthened, or your list of ‘to-do’s’ for your next session with your coach (or your wish list for when you feel ready to go work with someone). Capture your wins, your big cosmic questions, your insights about yourself. Anything and everything.

3 – Meditate or Chant

In practicing meditation for a few minutes a day, you naturally start to cultivate more stillness in the mind, more concentration and peace, and more mental resilience. You also become more accustomed to tuning in to your inner wisdom/divine guidance/intuition.

Make it simple. All you need is a comfortable chair or cushion and a quiet room or corner in which to sit for 5 or 10 minutes. That’s all.

If you’re new to meditation, the practice I like to start with is simply focusing on your breath for a few minutes. Here is a link to my free meditation downloads and I recommend checking out the Breath Awareness Meditation. It is simple, relaxing and all you need to start cultivating more stillness.

(You can also access these meditation tracks on the Insight Timer app (for iPhone and Android) where you will also find an amazing range of other mindfulness meditations.)

Chanting is another way to arrive into stillness and it feels amazing. I’m currently devouring Snatam Kaur’s new album, Beloved, and finding it a beautiful way to start my day. Choose one or two tracks that resonate for you and use them for your morning practice. If you’re new to her work, her album Grace is a wonderful place to start.

4 – Make space in your week, month, year

It’s a no-brainer to make time in your week for any of these practices, but it’s really easy for it to get pushed down the list. Work out the best time of the day for you – often the evening and towards bedtime can be good for these quieter practices, but don’t leave it so late that you’re too tired.

Negotiate/plan with your spouse so you can both have time out and get into the habit of making it regular, rather than the exception which is what I see happen a lot – hubby says, ‘Yes, have a couple of hours to yourself!” because he can see you’re about to split down the sides. Just take time out routinely so it doesn’t come to that. Perhaps it’s an hour to your self one evening a week, or one day a month. See what fits for you.

Plan your holidays for the year in advance. So many people are operating in survival mode where the aim of the year is to ‘get through it’ and work, and wait for the summer holidays to roll around. People who are not in this hamster-wheel mode plan ahead. They know it’s good to take a break through the year before they really need it, to plan ahead for a holiday they’d really like to have (rather than hastily booking an emergency holiday when they realise they’re about to hit the wall – been there, done that myself). Basically, don’t just plan for work, plan for LIFE.  

If we give one-tenth of our day to God, God gives Himself or Herself totally to us for the rest of the day.”

Yogi Bajan

Let’s make it okay to spend money/time/resources on personal + professional growth

I was talking with friends recently about how, in New Zealand where I live at least and even the UK, it’s still not what you might call widely acceptable or considered ‘typical’ to see a therapist or coach, or spend money on personal growth. It seems a lot more the norm in the US where individual growth and self-awareness are more encouraged and acceptable. It is changing here, but I think it’s a great shame it’s not more like that in New Zealand.

I’m aware the way I prioritise my spending of time and money around my health and spiritual growth makes me an outlier. Having a business coach makes me an outlier. While I do have some friends who do the same, many many people do not. And it’s not because I have more money to spend on this stuff, or that they don’t, it’s that they value and spend money on other things.

In the last 2 ½ years I have chosen to work part-time and earn less while I get to bottom of some of my health challenges. I’ve put my wellbeing at the top of the list and de-prioritised other things for a while. It’s my choice and not something I’m suggesting everyone else should do. But it has taught me to own what I value and get more comfortable with doing it differently to others. I’ve also learned of course, that without your health, the rest is pretty hollow. It was English writer, Thomas Fuller, who said “health is not valued till sickness comes.”

I have various friends who are almost the opposite; who prioritise financial or house or holiday goals over other goals, who feel it’s incredibly indulgent to have an ongoing coach, or will only see an osteopath if they can barely walk, and who view many health and personal growth approaches as luxuries or things to call on like an ambulance at the bottom of the cliff – not an ongoing part of living a healthy and ever-evolving life.

There’s nothing wrong with those choices, but don’t let these attitudes of others mess with what you feel is important to you. Spend your money on what you value. (It’s none of your business what other people think anyway.)

Why not bring personal growth related stuff into the rest of what is ‘normal’ in your life? For example if we were to budget for personal development in the same way we budget for yearly dental visits, we’d start to naturally make it part of what we do.

And keep an eye out for kidding yourself that you can’t afford these things – whether it’s to attend a mindfulness retreat, or see that coach, or buy that book. Perhaps you’re just not giving it the same priority as other things.

If we were to budget for personal development

in the same way we budget for yearly dental visits,

we’d start to naturally make it part of what we do.

I remember a few years ago getting an email from a newly booked-in client asking could she please postpone her first session as she ‘couldn’t afford it since she was saving for her upcoming holiday’. I translated this as she could afford it (if she’s saving for a holiday, she has spare money) but she wanted to spend it on her trip. Fair enough. She never re-booked and I understood that she just wasn’t ready – it wasn’t important enough to her yet to do the work.

I don’t see this as right or wrong, good or bad, but what I would say is that it pays to clean up the language around it so that we’re not tricking ourselves. It’s more accurate to say ‘I’m choosing to save money for my holiday instead of going to coaching’, or ‘Do I want to buy some summer clothes/a wetsuit or do I want to go to that retreat?’ because then we’re being more straight up with ourselves and therefore more in control.

Whatever you want, own it.

Karen x

PS.  This post is part two of three. If you haven’t caught the first post – here is Part One.  Part Three coming soon!

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I’m not going to mention how many days it is until Christmas because I hate it when people do that. I’d much rather remain ignorant and pretend the year isn’t moving along at quite such the break-neck speed it is. However, given that it is mere weeks away and silly season is certainly kicking in (today on a five minute drive from my house to my sister’s place I had three people pull out in front of me – a sure sign of the silliness), it’s a mighty fine time to get on the front foot at work and home so you can experience a less insane, and possibly even quite civilised tail end to the year.

Whatever you feel about the impending holiday season, how you arrive there can make a real difference to how you enjoy it. We can either arrive dragging ourselves over the finish line of the year, scraped and exhausted like some kind of desert marathon runner, or arrive intact and calm, perhaps feeling ready for a holiday but also feeling okay and satisfied with what we’ve done.

Here are some quick tips to help you not only survive the lead up to Christmas, but to also arrive with perhaps a little more aplomb (and energy) –

Get real about what REALLY needs to be done

I marvel every year at how (in New Zealand at least) everybody decides that everything needs to be completed by Christmas – that project needs to be finished, the book published, the marketing plan finalised, the Board manifesto rewritten, the company manual overhauled, etc etc etc. Of course some things do need to be done by then – like customer orders for Christmas and so on. But many things are only ‘due by the 24th’ because someone decided they should be. And then we become a slave to the deadline – whether we set it or someone else did.

So, sit back for a few minutes this week and re-check: What really needs to be done by the end of this working year?

Respect the 60 Second Rule

Related to the previous tip, the 60-Second Rule states: regardless of how organised, efficient and competent someone is, only 60 seconds of activity can be carried out in 60 seconds. That means 60 minutes of activity can be carried out in 60 minutes, one day of activity carried out in one day. You can only do so much with the time you have, it’s a fact.

So, when someone asks you to take on X project before Christmas and you are already maxed out, a very handy line to have in your back pocket is – “No problem, I also have the Z project on the go, and I could certainly do one of them in that timeframe – which one would you like me to do?” Don’t be afraid to put it back on the project leader or the person you report to, to make the call.

Make getting together easier

This is often the season for catching up for Christmas drinks with old colleagues or friends, etc (again – why in the two weeks before Christmas, pray tell?!!) so if you really must go with the tide and try to fit it all in before Noël, then why not combine catch-ups with a few people and meet them all at once. It’s a nice way for friends to meet other friends, and you only have to find one evening in your diary for it, not four evenings.

Conversely, if you’re feeling run down and low energy, getting together with one person at a time is less taxing and more of a chance for quality time.

Combine get-togethers with exercise – a personal favourite of mine – arrange to go walking or running with someone, a squash game, or whatever you both enjoy.

Take stock of your achievements – celebrate

My biggest wish for you these holidays (apart from ensuring you claim space and time for your rest and replenishment) is that you complete the year feeling aware of all that you’ve accomplished and contributed, and to know that regardless of what else might still be there to do – next year – that you deserve and can enjoy some time off, play and rest.

So, I beg you, please take ten minutes over a cup of tea or a glass of wine sometime BEFORE Christmas, to log in your notebook or on a random hunk of paper – What you’ve achieved this year – big and small – and what you’re most pleased with or proud of.

Take these few minutes to really feel the satisfaction and acknowledgement of all that you’ve done. Once written down, soak it up for a few moments, looking over it and really feeling how much has been done and what you brought to those situations, tasks and activities.

And if you want to take it a little deeper, check out the Summer Revolution Life Review Kit for a thorough review of your year, and your intentions for the year ahead. It’s a free download right here.

Here’s to arriving at holiday time intact, happy and ready to enjoy your holidays.

Much love,

Karen x

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If you’ve been following this series of three posts on making time for transformation, you’ll have no doubt in your mind about how I feel about, well, making time for transformation … I rate it big time! (Read Part One here and Part Two here). But as well as making time for this in our lives, what else do we need to factor in? Here I share some of my learnings around what being on a journey of transformation can mean and require. Call it a cheat-sheet for what to expect and look out for.

In this instalment:
Only you can make your journey important (and therefore prioritised)
Be okay with not being ready
Transformation takes time – and the pace will vary

Only you can make your journey important (and therefore prioritised)

I think we can find ourselves waiting for life to make this ‘finding time for me’ business easier and we might think, once the kids are at school, once work calms down, then I’ll do it. And you may have noticed, it somehow never comes! Or when it does, something else turns up to take up space.

Whether you can feel that you need to work fewer hours and have more time to yourself in the week, or just want a more regular timeslot for meditation, the only person who can really make that happen is you. And when you really own what is right for you, often the logistics start falling into place. That’s partly because the people around you respond differently when you are so internally aligned with your needs and stand in your own knowingness.

People will say to me – Well, I have to work to keep up with the mortgage payments, you know? Or I need to be home with the kids. Or I need to do these longer hours at the moment, the business is going through a lot of change.

And what they’re really saying is –
That other thing (mortgage, kids, staff, employer) is more important than me, or
I value the business over myself, or
My need to feel needed/important is stronger than my desire for growth.

You get the idea.

The thing is, you are important. And getting to the point where you have an embodied sense of this (not just an intellectual concept of it) and really KNOW IT – that’s part of the process of really taking space for you and your growth as a person.

Be okay with not being ready

In the early days of my private practice, one of my biggest learnings as a coach was around the powerful role readiness plays in how we grow. Being an eager and enthusiastic practitioner of change, I assumed that when people reached out to me – or got their husband/wife/employee/ brother to call me – that the person was ready to change their life and do the work required. I soon realised that was not always the case, and now recognise that we’re all moving at our own pace with our own levels of preparedness for change.

It’s okay if you’re not ready – just don’t mistake some trepidation or resistance for ‘not ready’ because that’s not the same thing. It’s normal to be ready and excited and scared about embarking on personal growth. Just don’t let the fear stop you.

And sometimes we have to face some harsh circumstances – to have the sh#@ hit the proverbial fan, so to speak – before we will take the plunge. Gabrielle Bernstein once said in an interview, “People have to hit a hard enough bottom to wake up and say, I’m really ready to do this… and you can’t deprive people of their ‘bottom’; they have to have that experience naturally.”

If you do find yourself hitting bottom, don’t berate yourself for that. Celebrate that it has woken you up, and wrap yourself in a warm blanket of compassion as you take the next step.

Personal transformation is not a Tinder date –

no one said it was fast or easy –

but it also doesn’t have to be slow, laborious or full of suffering.

Transformation takes time – and the pace will vary

Even when you are ready, and even chomping at the bit to finally let go of old patterns or emotions, it can take time. It’s not because it actually has to take a long time – I’ve experienced profound change or guided others through profound change in a matter of an hour, sometimes even minutes – but because there is usually a collection of patterns, beliefs and parts for healing that each need their day in the sun. One my clients put this succinctly just last week when he said “Yeah, you might be targeting one thing, but you’re never really working on one thing.”

Some of those parts won’t arise straight away and can take weeks, months or years to rise to the surface for healing. It still amazes me what I uncover in myself that I had worked on around the edges for some time – thus paving the way – that then comes right to the surface, ready for deep, extraordinary and lasting change.

I find that each of those parts come out when they are the next aspect that needs growth for you to move forward, when it feels like a safe space to do so, and when we the adult self is ready to do the work. A client recently said to me, “I can feel my teenage-self trusts me now to heal this old stuff, and I think now that I’ve met you, she also trusts you to guide us.” Beautiful.

For me, I had been ready for quite a while, but my deepest healing came when I found someone to work with who could totally hold the space for me, see me in my full potential before I could see it myself, and who had the ability to guide me expertly and safely. Then anything is possible!

If you do find yourself hitting bottom,

don’t berate yourself for that.

Celebrate that it has woken you up, and wrap yourself

in a warm blanket of compassion as you take the next step.

It’s good to bear in mind that you can speed up and slow down the process to some extent. Sometimes it gets slowed down somewhat because our schedule, work commitments or budget only allows us to have say one coaching session a month for a while. At other times we might be in a position to have more frequent sessions and therefore do more work, faster. If I find I have some rather uncomfortable stuff arising for healing that I don’t want to be marinating in for too long, I will sometimes have a couple of sessions close together so I can attend to those parts more quickly, and sometimes I’ll have a few sessions close together – weekly or twice weekly for instance – because I want a bit of acceleration.

Personal transformation is not a Tinder date – no one said it was fast or easy – but it also doesn’t have to be slow, laborious or full of suffering. It might involve some emotional moments and upset because the body needs those emotions expressed and released – but in my experience, it is just that – a release and not a place we need to wallow in.

A friend recently said to me how she wished she’d done her recent healing work about speaking up for herself ten years ago. We can probably all relate to that, but I also see it as all in perfection; those inner parts of her that had learned at a very early age to keep quiet and not use her voice have now come forward for healing when she is in a place in her life she can do that lovingly and with the support she needs. They can safely step out of the shadows and help her start becoming more of her magnificent self.

Here’s to you too, becoming your most magnificent self.

Much love,

Karen x

PS.  This post is part three of three. Catch Part One here and Part Two here – On Making Time for Transformation.

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So perhaps you’ve just read Part One of On Making Transformation, and you’re thinking, how do I actually start making space for this? I have found that getting the logistics sorted around having time for yourself can be just as game-changing as getting our head around it!

In this instalment:
How do you make space?
Let’s make it okay to spend money/time/resources on personal + professional growth 

How do you make space?

As well as the ongoing nature of personal transformation, what we do daily (or at least weekly) has a profound role to play in our growth. I was humbled recently when I read Snatam Kaur, American musician and author raised in the Sikh and Kundalini Yoga tradition, describing her morning practice. She says “it takes about two and a half hours to complete, or about one-tenth of a day. I remember Yogi Bhajan saying that if we give one-tenth of our day to God, God gives Himself or Herself totally to us for the rest of the day.” Her practice includes a wake-up routine, a recitation, yoga, chanting, prayer, and more. That can make spending 20-30 minutes on your meditation seat seem rather crummy! And YET, that 20 or 30 minutes is profound compared to not sitting at all.

These small practices can help you to start making more space for your own growth – and what I increasingly think of as your ongoing journey towards your most authentic self.

1 – Quiet 5 – breathe, ask – what do I need to know?

The smallest thing you could do in your day is to make more space for tuning in – to take what I call a ‘Quiet 5’. Simply sit somewhere comfortably where you won’t be disturbed and bring your attention to your breath. Sometimes good ideas or important things to remember can come to mind, so having a notepad and pen nearby to capture these can be helpful. At other times I might ask my unconscious mind, higher self or the Divine for guidance with a question I’m seeking answers to. In any case, it’s five minutes of quiet time for tuning into whatever is important for you there and then.

2 – Journal

Simply writing down what is coming to you can be a profound practice – and it’s a very different mental and emotional process to just thinking about it in your head, so don’t underestimate it. Capture what insights you’ve had from a book, a great experience you had with someone today that was a signal that your approach has changed or your sense of self has strengthened, your list of ‘to-do’s’ for your next session with your coach (or your wish list when you feel ready to go work with someone). Capture your wins, your big cosmic questions, your insights about yourself. Anything and everything.

3 – Meditate or Chant

In practicing meditation for a few minutes a day, you naturally start to cultivate more stillness in the mind, more concentration and peace, and more mental resilience. You also become more accustomed to tuning in to your inner wisdom/divine guidance/intuition.

Make it simple. All you need is a comfortable chair or cushion and a quiet room or corner in which to sit for 5 or 10 minutes. That’s all.

If you’re new to meditation, the practice I like to start with is simply focusing on your breath for a few minutes. Here is a link to my free meditation downloads and I recommend checking out the Breath Awareness Meditation. It is simple, relaxing and all you need to start cultivating more stillness.

(You can also access these meditation tracks on the Insight Timer app (for iPhone and Android) where you will also find an amazing range of other mindfulness meditations.)

Chanting is another way to arrive into stillness and it feels amazing. I’m currently devouring Snatam Kaur’s new album, Beloved, and finding it a beautiful way to start my day. Choose one or two tracks that resonate for you and use them for your morning practice. If you’re new to her work, her album Grace is a wonderful place to start.

4 – Make space in your week, month, year

It’s a no-brainer to make time in your week for any of these practices, but it’s really easy for it to get pushed down the list. Work out the best time of the day for you – often the evening and towards bedtime can be good for these quieter practices, but don’t leave it so late that you’re too tired.

Negotiate/plan with your spouse so you can both have time out and get into the habit of making it regular, rather than the exception which is what I see happen a lot – hubby says, ‘Yes, have a couple of hours to yourself!” because he can see you’re about to split down the sides. Just take time out routinely so it doesn’t come to that. Perhaps it’s an hour to your self one evening a week, or one day a month. See what fits for you.

Plan your holidays for the year in advance. So many people are operating in survival mode where the aim of the year is to ‘get through it’ and work, and wait for the summer holidays to roll around. People who are not in this hamster-wheel mode plan ahead. They know it’s good to take a break through the year before they really need it, to plan ahead for a holiday they’d really like to have (rather than hastily booking an emergency holiday when they realise they’re about to hit the wall – been there, done that myself).

If we give one-tenth of our day to God, God gives Himself or Herself totally to us for the rest of the day.”

Yogi Bajan

Let’s make it okay to spend money/time/resources on personal + professional growth

I was talking with friends recently about how, in New Zealand where I live at least and even the UK, it’s still not what I’d call widely acceptable or considered ‘typical’ to see a therapist or coach, or spend money on personal growth. It seems a lot more the norm in the US where individual growth and self-awareness are more encouraged and acceptable. It is changing here, but I think it’s a great shame it’s not more like that in New Zealand.

I’m aware the way I prioritise my spending of time and money around my health and spiritual growth makes me an outlier. Having a business coach makes me an outlier. While I do have some friends who do the same, many many people do not. And it’s not because I have more money to spend on this stuff, or that they don’t, it’s that they value and spend money on other things.

In the last 2 ½ years I have chosen to work part-time and earn less while I get to bottom of some of my health challenges. I’ve put my wellbeing at the top of the list and de-prioritised other things for a while. It’s my choice and not something I’m suggesting everyone else should do. But it has taught me to own what I value and get more comfortable with doing it differently to others. I’ve also learned of course, that without your health, the rest is pretty hollow. It was English writer, Thomas Fuller, who said “health is not valued till sickness comes.”

I have various friends who are almost the opposite; who prioritise financial or house or holiday goals over other goals, who feel it’s incredibly indulgent to have an ongoing coach, or will only see an osteopath if they can barely walk, and who view many health and personal growth approaches as luxuries or things to call on like an ambulance at the bottom of the cliff – not an ongoing part of living a healthy and ever-evolving life.

There’s nothing wrong with those choices, but don’t let these attitudes of others mess with what you feel is important to you. Spend your money on what you value. (It’s none of your business what other people think anyway.)

Why not bring personal growth related stuff into the rest of what is ‘normal’ in your life? For example if we were to budget for personal development in the same way we budget for yearly dental visits, we’d start to naturally make it part of what we do.

And keep an eye out for kidding yourself that you can’t afford these things – whether it’s to attend a mindfulness retreat, or see that coach, or buy that book. Perhaps you’re just not giving it the same priority as other things.

If we were to budget for personal development

in the same way we budget for yearly dental visits,

we’d start to naturally make it part of what we do.

I remember a few years ago getting an email from a newly booked-in client asking could she please postpone her first session as she ‘couldn’t afford it since she was saving for her upcoming holiday’. I translated this as she could afford it (if she’s saving for a holiday, she has spare money) but she wanted to spend it on her trip. Fair enough. She never re-booked and I understood that she just wasn’t ready – it wasn’t important enough to her yet to do the work.

I don’t see this as right or wrong, good or bad, but what I would say is that it pays to clean up the language around it so that we’re not tricking ourselves. It’s more accurate to say ‘I’m choosing to save money for my holiday instead of going to coaching’, or ‘Do I want to buy some summer clothes/a wetsuit or do I want to go to that retreat?’ because then we’re being more straight up with ourselves and therefore more in control.

Whatever you want, own it.

Karen x

PS.  This post is part two of three. Catch Part Three on On Making Time for Transformation, and if you haven’t caught the first post – here is Part One.

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Whether it’s for deep transformation, some stress relief or anything in between, when a client decides to come to coaching or a friend says he’s starting a six week mindfulness course, I always do an internal hop-skip-and-a-jump of celebration. I think, Yay, good on you! How awesome to be taking that time for yourself and to be choosing you!

It’s not always easy to make those commitments of time, money, energy – and sometimes it’s a real big leap of faith too. I just know it is something to celebrate and acknowledge – and perhaps particularly because taking time for yourself and choosing to work on yourself is still a minority activity. It’s not the norm, not encouraged, and rarely celebrated in any mainstream way. We’ll toast to someone buying a new house, getting a new job or partner, but not for deciding to see a therapist!

If you’re reading this post, it’s likely you’re part of that minority that’s interested in their own evolution. And if so, welcome. Being a proud member of the evolving minority, I feel it’s important to talk about the kind of time we need to claim for ourselves in order to do our own personal transformation. (And catch Part II and Part II on this topic here!)

In this instalment:
What are we making time for?
Claiming the space makes all the difference
A word to the parents out there

I recently took a Friday off after a busy week, in order to work with my healer/coach, to rest, to journal, to meditate and just be. I was standing in the kitchen preparing lunch early that afternoon and an epiphany about some resistance and fear that had been coming up for me about the next steps I want to take in my business. Earlier that day I’d been freaking out about my plans and changes (more on this another time) and as I made my salad, pure clarity about what the fear was really about slid into my mind like a shaft of sunlight. Illumination!

I just love those moments of insight that open a doorway to really letting go of old patterns and fears. And I’m really aware that my aha moment was able to flow in because of the space I’d created for it – by having nothing much to do and nowhere to be that day.

I had space, and so did my mind and inner wisdom. This is where so much of the transformation takes place; in our quiet awareness.

In that space we get to SEE what’s there. And you can’t transform, heal or strengthen something you don’t know about.

And because I had the time, I was able to sit down later on and journal about my new awareness and then do some healing around it. Sometimes I might put the issue on my ‘spiritual to-do’ list for my next session with my healer coach, but in any case, it’s captured, named and ‘booked in’ because of the space I’ve made for it.

I don’t know about you, but I don’t get these insights so easily when I’m busy and active.

I know if I don’t take the time, I don’t manage to do the deeper work.

I have to stop, slow down and be.

What are we making time for?

Personal transformation comes from the alchemy of your self-awareness, of being grounded and connected, and from doing the healing and change work necessary to heal and release the conditioning, patterns and wounds that keep you from being your authentic self. That means making time for –

Self-awareness – building your capacity for living mindfully, and becoming more aware of how you are being, feeling, thinking and responding in your life. Taking time to reflect. Bringing compassion and curiosity to what you notice. Ultimately, this means slowing down, being mindful and paying attention (often helped by meditation) and taking time to journal and reflect.

Being grounded and connected – Having even a small spiritual or nature-based practice each day that helps you to get fully into your body, ground yourself, and be more connected to your higher self / God / All that is. Change or transformation doesn’t just happen in a therapy session, it happens when you show up for yourself by sitting to meditate or breathe and connect. It happens when in a yoga class or sitting under a tree (look at Gautama Buddha!).

Healing and change work – Whatever the modality, my experience is that the deepest work is often one-to-one with someone who can guide you through transformation. This is by far where I’ve done my deepest work, and it is the coming together of my awareness, readiness and willingness to be guided – along with someone who can guide me and see even more than I can.

The alchemy comes as each of these elements support the others – the self-awareness supports the healing work, staying connected deepens the work, and the healing work builds more self-awareness and centeredness, and so on it goes. And each of these elements requires some of our time and attention.

When I found myself in bed with glandular fever five years ago and unable to work, taking time to heal myself suddenly got very real. As well as some recovery time right then, I took six weeks off at the end the year, and planned breaks in advance through the year after that. I’d learnt the hard way what happens when you don’t take regular breaks and don’t take care of yourself. It took me a while, but I slowly learned to make space and time for transformation.

And it wasn’t just about taking physical care of myself. In fact it was – and still IS – taking care of my spiritual self. Yes, there were physical factors involved in me being unwell and I’m still getting to the bottom of some of those even now, but I know now, it was VERY MUCH about my spiritual growth.

It was about how I see myself in the world, how I think I need to be and show up for others, and what it really means to cherish myself. And that, as the old saying goes, is a journey. Learning to cherish yourself is not a five minute job, but it’s worth making all the space in the world for – because it leads to more deeply knowing and nourishing yourself, which in turn leads to the relationships, fulfilment and flourishing I think we all truly yearn for.

Clients will sometimes say to me after coming to coaching for say a career change or relationship goal, “I didn’t realise this was going to be a spiritual process, but now I see that it’s exactly that.” And from that place of understanding they transform their career or their relationship, or their life. Not bad for a spiritual journey, right?

Learning to cherish yourself

is not a five minute job,

but it’s worth making all the space

in the world for.

Claiming the space makes all the difference

The biggest challenge for most of us I think, is that we don’t stop. We’re so busy lurching from one task, event, job, person, meeting, school pick-up, lunch date, washing pile or board report to the next, that we don’t have time to contemplate our navel, or our soul’s desires, for a moment. We’re in doing mode, not being mode. And besides, most of us were brought up to value busy-ness, action and doing over sitting quietly or resting (often referred to in our culture as ‘being lazy’). We have a lot of conditioning to shed before taking time to Be becomes standard procedure.

Even if we’re taking some time in the day to simply sit quietly, it can be a little like ‘skimming the surface’. I kidded myself about this for a long time. We actually need to be able to go quiet enough for our inner wisdom/higher self/the voice of God (take your pick or use your own reference to the all-that-is) to get a word in edge wise.

Some days we might manage to ask for some insight or pray for help while we’re on our meditation seat or in the car driving home from work, but we don’t always go quiet enough, long enough, to LISTEN.

We skim the surface too when we read a great book and have a profound insight around something or identify a daily practice that really resonates with us, and DO NOTHING TO FOLLOW UP. Maria Forleo says “insight without action is absolutely useless.”

You can read all the books in the world, and if you don’t DO anything to take your insights forward, if you don’t sit quietly often enough, or if you don’t do the deeper work around those patterns and fears you’re identifying, you run the risk of being at a spiritual standstill. Or on what my grandmother used to call a slow boat to China.

It doesn’t take nearly so long to grow when you are watering the seeds and bringing in the light.

A word to the parents out there

I’ve heard so many parents over the years say to me “It’s hard to get some quiet time with the kids in the house”, and a couple of my clients have very real challenges around this with severely autistic children etc. But most do not – they’re simply not accustomed to claiming space for themselves, setting boundaries with their kids, or helping their children learn to self-soothe and amuse themselves (age dependant of course – I am under no illusion what this is like if you have one or more kids under 2yrs or even 5 yrs!).

I’m not a parent yet and I don’t profess to be an expert on this, but I have observed many parents and families over the years who take time for themselves and who don’t, and I know this to be true:

When you claim time and space to look after yourself, when you take time to be quiet, and when you make it clear to others how important self-care is (by making it happen for yourself), you teach your children to look after themselves.

You teach them self-care.
You are role-modelling self-love.
This is priceless.

And there is evidence everywhere right now that our children (and the world) needs this very badly.

It’s not selfish to take time to do your own work.
It helps everyone.

Much love,

Karen x

Catch Parts Two and Three on this topic where I talk about how you can make space, making it okay to spend money/time/resources on personal + professional growth , then about how to be okay with not being ready – and why transformation can take time.

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The post On Making Time for Transformation – Part One appeared first on Start With You.

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