During my own decision making proces I met Single-adopter Charlotte. She started out by showing me all the binders filled with official documents related to the adoption process.
Even a former taxation-jurist like me was overwhelmed by the volume. At some point Charlottes son Noah came running into the living room and said out loud:
‘Mom, I feel like a mommy’s boy right now and I need a hug.’
My heart melted as I saw Noah and Charlotte hug each other.
Then Noah said: ’May I have an ice-cream now?’ and the three of us laughed.
I told Charlotte how I found that they were very much alike, her and Noah, and then immediately apologized to her, in case she thought that was inappropriate. Charlotte told me that it was fine and that she was often met with similar comments – including when she first held Noah in her arms in Vietnam.
She showed me the photos from that day and I had goose bumps all over, and my eyes filled with tears.
Having met Charlotte made me decide on a deadline on my project of becoming a mom the biological way.
I decided, that should my project not succeed, then I would look into the possibility of becoming a “single-adopter” no later than when I turned 39.”
”One thing I considered a lot before deciding to have a child on my own was how to ensure that my son would also have sufficient male influence in his life. I am thinking of male role models that could teach him how to wrestle, climb trees, watch football and drink beer (when he is old enough).
This is especially important when making sure that my son will be able to recognize his own masculinity and not be completely feminized from growing up with lots of women around him.
You can strengthen your connection with your male friends by asking them if they would commit to taking junior out for ball games or car races.
I really enjoy how Johan does things with his granddad and uncles, how he just takes in the male jargon.”