Tempted to give up? Are you sick and tired of the struggle? As a dating and relationship coach, I hear from many women that they put themselves out there for one month and then they shut down again. "All the men online are creeps," or "Going to events is a waste of time," or "I only attract losers," are some of the phrases I hear from women. You won't get anywhere if you stop trying just because you hit a rough patch. Sure we all wish life was easy, and that our goals arrived exactly when WE wanted them to. But this is real life, and things don't always come to us on our time-table. I like to think that there is a divine time-table, and that things come to us when we are ready for them. We have to let go and surrender to what the higher plan is. But meanwhile, we take actions and don't give up. We may change course, and talk to people, trying to figure out how to get to our goal faster, but we don't just shut down and stop fighting for what we want - whether we want a man, a career or anything else we are trying to achieve.
Here's a funny dating story I think my single lady fans would appreciate. I know a lot of you single ladies are frustrated at times while searching for your Mr. Right. Just realize wacky and weird - as well as frustrating and disappointing - situations happen to everyone while dating. Even the bold and the beautiful. Those with stunning looks who have it all. No one is immune to boorish or immature men. Or men who are buyers beware. Or men who prefer a casual girlfriend to something deeper. One gorgeous client told me a story that is so wacky, I thought I should share it, so you realize you aren't alone: OK, so she was dating online and this man who was nearly 20 years older than her, and just average in every way, kept pestering her. Like for weeks. He seemed nice, but nothing sparked an interest, so she told him she wasn't interested. He continued to pester her and tell her funny jokes. Finally, she thought: "OK, what harm will one date do?" He does seem funny and nice. So she agreed, and he was excitedly planning the date. When they got to date planning, he wanted her to drive an hour to his area to meet him at his favorite restaurant. She was like: "Sorry, it would be better if you met me here," referring to her area. This lady is model gorgeous and the thought her of driving in her high heels and tight skirt, an hour to meet this guy on his turf (this guy who was pestering her to date him), was laughable. Plus, she thought, he's older than me and of that generation that should appreciate chivalry, doesn't he get chivalry? When she told him her area was better, he said: "OK, next time you are in my area, call me and we can meet." Of course she ignored his email and she quickly emailed me, and we both were shocked. A lot of men do complain that they can't get a girlfriend, but the reason is sometimes quite clear, when looking at it from afar. If this guy was too lazy to do the drive for a gorgeous hottie, I can't imagine what he is bringing to the table in a real relationship. Anyhow, I'm sure you ladies have similar crazy stories. Feel free to email me, and let me know if I can share them on my Facebook fan page, where I also share "Online Dating Disasters" in a special album. Here is the link to my fan page if you want to check it out: https://www.facebook.com/KarennaAlexanderLLC/
NARCISSISTS and BUYERS BEWARE got you down? Don't DESPAIR! I feel horrible when women have given up on love and tell me they are "happily single," when I think deep down they are simply afraid to get back on the horse because they have been damaged by a NARCISSIST or by a MAJOR BUYER BEWARE. THERE ARE STRATEGIES TO HELP!! I have researched this topic a great deal and have dating strategies to help you spot these men and stop them in their tracks. Often times, narcissists are very charming and it can be difficult to tell if they truly like you in a healthy way, or if they are simply trying to love bomb you into submission. Don't feel bad if you have been fooled before. Often times, narcs are very manipulative and outwardly charming and appealing. Sometimes there is a fine line between healthy love at first sight or a manipulative narc. Once you are in a relationship with one, it is harder to extract oneself, so it's better to learn strategies to avoid them before getting into such a situation. One strategy that is helpful to prevent you from falling for one, or getting sucked into one of these unhealthy relationships with a buyer beware, is to go very slow. Pace the relationship in the beginning. Usually, when you take a relationship slow, a narcissist or any buyer beware personality type reveals their true colors and this is when you can get out quickly, without getting too hurt. If you need more help dating and weeding out narcs and other buyers beware, I would love to help you. It's an issue that has come up throughout the many years of my dating coaching practice with many clients, and I have helped them weed out these men, and get them engaged and married and into happy relationships. I can help you in a group coaching setting or through private coaching. Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org if you would like to know more about how you can avoid these men and find a great guy. A beautiful fulfilling relationship is within your reach, no matter what your background. Don't look back, look forward to all the exciting possibilities. Good luck! xoxo, Karenna
You can be a model, and still turn off men if you don't understand them.
Are you turning off men on the first date, without realizing what you are doing wrong? You can kill a good thing if you don’t understand men. When I was a matchmaker, I learned firsthand that it’s not enough to be beautiful. That helps, and that will draw men to you, but if you don’t have the right strategy down, a guy can lose his attraction pretty fast. Many gorgeous women don’t understand men well. They think that because they are gorgeous, that all men want them, and that is not necessarily the case. A man may think they are stunning, but all men have types and are drawn to specific types. Some men are attracted to the girl next door. I had a wealthy client who I set up with a beautiful model in her late 20s. He was attracted to her, but she turned him off during the date by being aggressive and controlling. After their first date at a swank NYC restaurant, he told me that he was turned off by several harsh statements, and by being interrogated about several things, including whether he wanted children. He said she turned him off because she came off as demanding and desperate (to him it felt like she was asking him, after one date, to have her child), and he was surprised I didn’t coach her better. I laughed because I do coach women not to reveal too much on Date Zero, and even beyond. But not all women are ready or willing to listen to the advice. Whether or not you are a model, you can have the man of your dreams if you follow the right dating strategy. Take it slow. Don’t ruin things on a Date Zero by revealing too much or being demanding or controlling. And don’t see a man every day for the first month. (This happens!) A slow courtship will get you much further than a marathon first meeting that lasts for hours, or days and then flames out as fast as it started. You can learn a ton more about a man through a slow courtship than by a fast one that begins with a first-date interrogation. If the relationship moves too swiftly, it crashes and burns fast and is no fun for you or the guy. Men love a little mystery. Of course there is more to it, and if you would like to learn more about how to put your best foot forward in the dating arena - on the inside and outside - contact Karenna by applying here or reply to this email: https://karenna1.typeform.com/to/YaF1PF