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Win Back Your Ex: an Easy Guide 

Your relationship has ended, and only now do you realise just how much you loved her.  I get it, your heart is broke and you need to get her back.  Unfortunately, there are no easy answers for this, but I can tell you what NOT to do to win back your ex.  One of my clients broke up with her fiancé because of various reasons, and he won her back, but he made some mistakes along the way.  Now, I am going to let you in on the pitfalls to avoid while trying to reunite with your love. 

Do not ask her to marry you 

If a woman has recently dumped you, asking her to marry you will certainly push her further away.  Unless a woman is desperate and has no self respect, she will not come back to you simply because you flash a shiny diamond.  And if she does, you have bigger problems.  Marriage is a big step, and asking her out of desperation could be the biggest mistake of your life.  

Do not call her or drop by her house 

Stalking your Ex is not an option unless you are looking forward to being slapped with a restraining order.  Keep a respectable distance.  If you cannot go without communicating with her, wait a month and send her a short message on Facebook or the like.  Only ask how she is, and no matter how you really feel, say you are feeling good.  Avoid driving by her house, or if that is not possible, do not ask about vehicles at her house that are not familiar to you.  The last thing you want is to make her feel like you think she is a possession. 

Do not become a hermit, shut-in, or depressed shell of a man 

Nothing is less sexy than a man who cannot pull himself up by the boot straps and move on, despite the pain.  Show her that you are capable of living without her.  If you throw yourself into depressed heap, it will only show her that you are emotionally unstable and unable to handle stress.  She needs to see that you can handle whatever life throws at you with grace and humility.  If necessary, seek counselling. 

Do not stay single to try to win back your ex 

Anything that seems like desperation is a turn off.  Do not let Hollywood’s lies lull you into believing in a fairy tale ending.  You need to move on with your life just as you would if you had no desire to get her back.  You never know, you might meet the perfect girl in the meantime. 

Sometimes relationships end so that space can be made for the right person.  You have to keep this in mind if you are suffering over a breakup.  If you don’t win her back, you may always feel that she was the one who got away.  However, if you follow these suggestions, maybe you will win her back, but at least you will walk away from the relationship looking like a winner.   

If you would like some help, or want to meet someone new – book a Dating Coaching session now

The post Win Back Your Ex – What NOT to do appeared first on James Preece.

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How Do You Know If You’re In Love

Many of us would like to believe that it’s easy to read our own emotions. This is true for some people, but for many of us, it’s inaccurate. It’s easy to confuse a bad feeling with simply nerves or anxiety. It’s easy to think we are in love when we’re actually feeling infatuation or lust. Many of our emotions feel similar to other emotions and that makes it hard to know what we’re really feeling. Being able to tell the difference between love and lust is crucial if you’re looking for a serious relationship. You don’t want to spend time getting to know someone to find out that you didn’t like them the way you thought you did. It’s better to know than to play a guessing game with your emotions.

This list should help if you are asking yourself how do you know if you are falling in love. Here are 30 signs that you’re in love

You’re always checking to see if this person messaged you.
You often re-read the messages this person has sent you.
You feel like you can talk to this person about anything.
You often find yourself talking about the future with this person.
You’re always talking about this person to your friends and family.
You see things all around you that make you think of this person.
You want to know everything about this person.
You make mental notes about what this person likes and doesn’t like.
You’re willing to make little sacrifices for this person.
You are happy when this person accomplishes something (even when it doesn’t involve you).
You find it easy to be around this person.
You find yourself willing to do anything just to spend time with this person.
You tend to lose track of time whenever you’re with this person.
You always have a good time with this person.
You enjoy boring things as long as you’re with this person.
You feel butterflies in your stomach when you think of this person.
You feel addicted to being around this person.
You miss this person when they are not around.
You don’t worry if it takes this person a while to respond.
You don’t get super jealous or suspicious about this person.
You aren’t worried about introducing this person to your friends and family.
You are excited to make this person a part of your life.
You want this person to be a part of your major life events.
You aren’t worried about this person hurting you eventually.
You aren’t worried about scaring this person away.
You feel happier since you’ve been with this person.
You find it easy to be yourself around this person.
You learn things about yourself because of this person.
You want to share all your stories with this person.
You feel confident in your relationship with this person.

Do you have the answer to “how do you know if you’re in love ” now? Of course, knowing the signs doesn’t help you completely. Many of these qualities are present when you have a general interest in someone. If more than half of these statements apply to you, then you’re likely in love. If you’re not sure about some of them, you may be projecting your emotions. If you want to fall in love, you may trick yourself into believing that you are. Unfortunately, this is only self-sabotage as it never lasts in the long run. So how you do really know if you are in love? You may want spend some time alone and really ask yourself how you feel.

The post How Do You Know If You’re In Love appeared first on James Preece.

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How Do You Know If You’re In Love

Many of us would like to believe that it’s easy to read our own emotions. This is true for some people, but for many of us, it’s inaccurate. It’s easy to confuse a bad feeling with simply nerves or anxiety. It’s easy to think we are in love when we’re actually feeling infatuation or lust. Many of our emotions feel similar to other emotions and that makes it hard to know what we’re really feeling. Being able to tell the difference between love and lust is crucial if you’re looking for a serious relationship. You don’t want to spend time getting to know someone to find out that you didn’t like them the way you thought you did. It’s better to know than to play a guessing game with your emotions.

This list should help if you are asking yourself how do you know if you are falling in love. Here are 30 signs that you’re in love

You’re always checking to see if this person messaged you.
You often re-read the messages this person has sent you.
You feel like you can talk to this person about anything.
You often find yourself talking about the future with this person.
You’re always talking about this person to your friends and family.
You see things all around you that make you think of this person.
You want to know everything about this person.
You make mental notes about what this person likes and doesn’t like.
You’re willing to make little sacrifices for this person.
You are happy when this person accomplishes something (even when it doesn’t involve you).
You find it easy to be around this person.
You find yourself willing to do anything just to spend time with this person.
You tend to lose track of time whenever you’re with this person.
You always have a good time with this person.
You enjoy boring things as long as you’re with this person.
You feel butterflies in your stomach when you think of this person.
You feel addicted to being around this person.
You miss this person when they are not around.
You don’t worry if it takes this person a while to respond.
You don’t get super jealous or suspicious about this person.
You aren’t worried about introducing this person to your friends and family.
You are excited to make this person a part of your life.
You want this person to be a part of your major life events.
You aren’t worried about this person hurting you eventually.
You aren’t worried about scaring this person away.
You feel happier since you’ve been with this person.
You find it easy to be yourself around this person.
You learn things about yourself because of this person.
You want to share all your stories with this person.
You feel confident in your relationship with this person.

Do you have the answer to “how do you know if you’re in love ” now? Of course, knowing the signs doesn’t help you completely. Many of these qualities are present when you have a general interest in someone. If more than half of these statements apply to you, then you’re likely in love. If you’re not sure about some of them, you may be projecting your emotions. If you want to fall in love, you may trick yourself into believing that you are. Unfortunately, this is only self-sabotage as it never lasts in the long run. So how you do really know if you are in love? You may want spend some time alone and really ask yourself how you feel.

The post How Do You Know If You’re In Love appeared first on James Preece.

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Where to meet single people?  We live in the age of dating apps and there are some great online dating sites too.  While these have become extremely popular, meeting single people in the real world is tougher than ever.  Everyone is afraid to talk to each other for fear of rejection.  People have their guards up and make being approached even tougher.  Approach anxiety is an increasing problem. As a Dating Coach I can understand this.  Who wants to me made to look silly in front of other people?

The good news is that it is still REALLY easy to get dates in the real world.  You just need to know what to do and not be afraid to give it a little try.

How can I tell someone is single?

Unless they are wearing a wedding ring, it’s hard to tell if someone is single on sight.  However, single people do things that coupled up people don’t as they have more time on their hands.  So they are much more likely to be doing things like hitting the gym, chilling out with a coffee or a reading a book in the park.  Watch them for a minute or so, just to make sure they are definitely on their own then go up and say hello.

How do I initiate a chat?

You can do one of two things.  Firstly, go up and ask a question.  You could ask for directions somewhere or their opinion on which top to buy for your “brother.”   When the chat is started you can start leading it in the way you want.  Or if you are feeling brave, pay them a compliment.  Men don’t get as many as women so it will mean more.  Compliment them on their clothes, hair or smile rather than their looks.  At the very least, you’ll make their day!

Where is the best place to know where to meet single people ?

If you want to know where to meet single people then you need to go where they are likely to be.  I teach my dating coaching clients to approach people in bookshops, when they spot people looking at the self help or dating books.  Singles events can be good too if you want quick access to possible dates. 

What is the biggest turn-off?

The biggest turn off is looking miserable!  Nobody wants to get to know someone boring or sad.  So whatever you do, smile and they won’t be able to help but smile back.

Is it best to be funny, sexy, goofy etc on first meeting?

Don’t try too hard but make sure that above all you are interesting.  You want them to be intrigued about you and have the chance to find out more. Whatever you are, be yourself…but be the best version of yourself. 

Remember, you didn’t know them before and if it doesn’t work you still don’t know them.  So nothing has changed and you’ve lost nothing!

If you’d like some help to learn where to meet single people the real world, get in touch now. 

The post Where to Meet Single People – Dating Expert Guide appeared first on James Preece.

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How To Ditch Your Comfort Zone

Too many of us reside inside a “comfort zone”. That means we have a routine and we are generally stuck to it. This can be limited to certain situations, like only going to a specific bar on Friday night because you know the bouncer and the bartender. Or it can be a more general term that refers to every aspect of your life. Either way, a comfort zone is always restrictive. The only real benefit to a comfort zone is safety. You know what to expect. As a Dating Coach I see this is a problem for many people.

The element of danger in something new is impossible to avoid. Fear is the the natural response to danger. Fear results in never trying anything new or stepping outside of that comfort called familiarity. But there are so many benefits to learning how to ditch your comfort zone! For instance, meeting new people in love and life. Experiencing new opportunities is a good reason as well. Also, many people who step outside of their comfort zone discover a whole new side of themselves The benefits of ditching your comfort zone greatly outweigh staying inside.

Here are a few tips to learn how to ditch your comfort zone:

  • Designate a wing-man, someone who will come with you to new places or be involved in new experiences that has also been a part of older experiences
  • Transition slowly by making small changes in your habits or routines before you ever try and make the bigger ones
  • Set goals for yourself regarding your progress to be able to see how far you’ve come
  • Practice pushing yourself past your goals a little bit more each time
  • Think positively because otherwise, you’re going into new situations with a predisposition for negative results
  • Remember; everything (good or bad) is an experience and experience means knowledge so nothing is ever a waste of time
  • See a professional if you’re unable to make the changes yourself but want to experience life outside your comfort zone

Of course, it’s not easy. At first, you have to force yourself to try new things. You’ll feel intimidating and maybe scared. If you always go to the same bar on Friday night, trying a new bar is a start. You might not know anyone there. You might be afraid of who you’ll run into. But you won’t know unless you try. That’s a good motto to hold onto while you’re trying to ditch your comfort zone. There are countless possibilities to each experience if you’re willing to see more than the familiar ones.

Practice makes perfect. If you can force yourself to step outside of your comfort zone enough times with positive results, you’ll see that it no longer feels like an obligation. It may even be fun to try new things and go new places. You may find yourself meeting new people, including a new you. But don’t be too discouraged if you encounter negative results. Nothing is perfect. There are going to be times you step outside your comfort zone and say “oh yeah, that’s why I don’t do this”. Just try and remember that each situation is different. By generalizing your experiences, you’re several limiting your options.

“In order to see change, you must change what you see.“

The post How To Ditch Your Comfort Zone appeared first on James Preece.

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