In My Shawls | Singapore Style & Lifestyle Blog.+Add.Feed Info1000FOLLOWERS
In my shawls came about as a surprise while watching the television, snacking and being a couch potato.This space serves as a creative
outlet for me after a long day of being real. Here is where I get to sometimes be someone else and be immersed in a play pretend character. Be inspired at your own risk.
Another year will be behind us. Time moves really fast. I remember welcoming January like it was just yesterday. Soon enough, we will be welcoming 2018 with open arms.
I recall in the last moments of 2016, I hoped for an epic new year. Although it was not the epic that I had hope for, it was a pretty awesome year. There were lots of ups and downs, specifically in the last quarter of the year but it was one of the best things that has happened to me in a long time.
I don't have any resolutions for the coming year because I usually don't keep up with it. However, if I were to pick one out, it would be to be nicer to myself. I think a lot about what others think or feel. I know I shouldn't because nobody should matter.
2018 is going to be epic. For real. I know it will. I have a little secret that I can't wait to share with everyone. Meanwhile, thank you for sticking around till 2018.
I see the cup half empty. I have always viewed life like that since I knew what to think of it. It is really funny how I can give advices on my blog or pump someone up and telling them to be positive about life when I am always at my deepest pit.
The past few days, I have been feeling very insecure about myself. From the way I look, to the way people think of me. Every single day, I believe that I am burden to everyone around me. It is a sinking feeling. I sink to the bottom by the hour and I couldn't swim up to save myself. I constantly feel like I inject pain to people.
Today, my heart felt empty. Which is ironic because it has been the fullest that it can be since two years ago. I felt my heart closing up. I was not able to reciprocate my feelings. It was empty. I remember this feeling many moons ago but that was a given. My heart was lost. How can my heart be in pain now that it has multiplied?
A puppet with no puppeteer. I feel exactly like that. Lifeless and unmotivated.
I try very hard to disassociate myself from the person that I was before. Maybe in the quest to be different, I became such a negative Nancy. I am like an onion. Perhaps perfect from the outside. As soon as you start peeling my layers, your eyes sting. I feel like I have been like that to the people around me. People whom I love very very much.
It is a constant battle with myself. That I am not good enough. That I am not perfect enough. That I am a burden to the people I love. That I am a nuisance in their life. That their life would have been better without me in it.
The past few nights, I have been accompanying myself with tears. I blame myself for the failed or failing relationships. Sometimes, I wish I have issues with other people instead of myself. You can run away from people but how do you run away from yourself?
Today, I went back to the abyss. The dark and cold cave that I once took solace in.
I like sitting in a room filled with women who share the same passion and likes. Last Saturday, I spent my afternoon learning about tips and tricks from new and experienced makeup artists. Not only that, I get to meet inspiring womenpreneurs who are very dedicated and passionate about the products that they offer to the community.
Of course, my favourite part of the whole afternoon was the makeup demo. I love watching Youtube videos and makeup artists apply makeup because I feel like there are certain techniques that I can pick up and use for myself. Also, ALWAYS ask the holy grail products of them makeup artists! They can definitely be trusted.
Iqa, from @say.beautiful, has been doing her makeup on her clients using only Farmasi Cosmetics products. I was a little skeptical about the liquid foundation because naturally, I feel that natural products will not give me perfect coverage. Boy was I wrong! The model had troubled skin and blemishes.
Iqa used Farmasi High Performance Foundation #06, which you can get at My Little Cocoon for only $31. I was honestly impressed at the coverage. She mentioned that for blemished skin, apply concentrated amount of foundation on the blemishes itself and then blend towards the rest of the skin. Oh, she used no concealer. WIN.
Just look at that coverage!! Remind me that i need that in my kit.
For an everyday look that is perfect for work, Iqa went with a simple eye and defined brows. Iqa used all Farmasi products on the model's face. Floored yet?
There was a short skincare demo by Elsyle, products from Hokkaido. I picked up something very interesting yet never thought of, which I started doing last night.
Sis Khadijah was telling us that while applying our skincare routine, praise ourselves. Tell ourselves that we are pretty. That we are awesome and beautiful. It sounded weird but I realised that she's right. Self love begins with loving ourself. If we believe that we are beautiful, it shows on the outside. Let me know if I look beautiful the next time you see me ok? hehe
The next makeup demo was on a medium/tanned skin by a known makeup artist, Pippin Emerald. She used all products by Khadija. I was very happy that the techniques I used on myself is similar to that of a professional makeup artist. Maybe one day I can consider doing makeup for people, no?
The makeup artist used Khadija Loose Powder Foundation in Shade 11. I would have probably mixed in shade 11 and 13 but I understand that some skins oxidise more so I assume that was the reason for shade 11. She also used shade 13 as a contour shade!
Pippin Emerald also used products from the new brand that My Little Cocoon is bringing in, Isabelle Dupont. I am actually very excited to get my hands on it because the mascara Pippin Emerald used on the model looks very promising! She had lashes for days! Isabelle Dupont has liquid lipsticks too! Isabelle Dupont is not on My Little Cocoon's website yet, but when it is, I will let you know!
The finished look (which I stupidly forgot to capture) left the model looking chic for work and ready to conquer the world. Khadija powder foundation is really versatile for all skin tones. I suggest going down to My Little Cocoon's office to swatch the colours and try it on for yourself. Khadija is by far, the most full coverage powder foundation that is halal, vegan and won't break the bank.
You should really check out My Little Cocoon's website for more information on the products I have mentioned. Let me know if you would like me to make a video on Khadija and Farmasi products!
Congratulations Erianna and Aisha from My Little Cocoon for the successful event! May all of us benefit from the makeup sessions and support local entrepreneurs. These two, are saving our skin, one natural product at a time.
I was scrolling Facebook at half past one in the morning and I came across a post that I was not particularly excited about. Please do not mistake this post as a cry for feminism. I am just a woman who scrolls through Facebook past midnight.
1. Women wear makeup for themselves
We hear this way too many times. In fact, it sounds so cliché that men probably don't take that statement too seriously. Women wear makeup to feel good about themselves. I have pictures of me without makeup in the world wide web which we all know will be etched in the digital world forever. To be completely honest, I am very comfortable in my skin without makeup. Flaws and all. However, there are also days when I feel like looking good for myself. I want to look like the better version of myself.
Do you also know how therapeutic applying makeup actually is? It is my cure all for every time I feel horrible and I know I am not the only woman who feels like that. It is very satisfying every time I look at myself in the mirror after beating it to death. Trust me, I am not wasting my hard earn cash on you boys.
Haven't you heard? We actually wear makeup so that we can get compliments from other girls. Sorry guys, you are irrelevant.
2. "Nobody should (needs to) wear makeup"
You may not like it, I understand. You want your girlfriend, lover or wife to bare it all, go for it. But stop there. If you need to impose it on your significant other, then do it. Don't impose it on the general women population.
Yes, there are some woman out there who are not interested in makeup. Good for them! My best friend prefers 'Home Fix' to Sephora. But trust my little voice in this. Even the tiniest wing liner can make the masculine of a woman, happy.
So if your girlfriend says she don't like to wear makeup, that is probably because she don't like applying it. It does not mean she never wants to see herself all made up.
3. 'Posts articles of celebrities without makeup'
Oh yeah, they are born with beautiful skin. No wait, have you heard of...
And many many more?
Do you also know that these treatments are not easily attainable by mere mortal females because we are not Jennifer Lopez. We sometimes can't even afford a simple facial! You should probably equip us with the resources so that we can look like your favourite celebrities without makeup. Just saying.
4. "I like girls who look natural."
A whole lot of bull.
Make Up Atau Tak Make Up? - YouTube
I am sorry if you can't understand this but basically the men were asked if they generally like women with or without makeup. One said he likes the natural look. Another said he likes a woman who doesn't wear makeup but also doesn't look pale. Another insisted that he likes a woman without makeup.
They were then showed a picture of a very brave lady without her makeup.
Basically these guys flipped. They thought she would look better with a little bit of powder, eyeliner and lipstick. Honey, those are makeup.
So men, what is your definition of natural? Because my dear, to look 'natural' I need at least ten products. Again, if you want no makeup but without the pigmentations, dark under eye circles, flushed cheeks and lips, please go back to number three.
Let us do whatever we want. Let us wear makeup as thick as your Harry Potter book. Or as thin a layer as that shirt you are wearing today. In fact, let everyone do whatever makes them feel good.
Ladies, please don't ever let a man or anyone else tell you otherwise. If putting on a full coverage foundation gets you out of the house feeling like Michelle Obama then go for it. If having rainbow on your lids for your first date makes you less shy and more confident, then beat that face. If a tinted moisturiser makes you feel more fresh and lively, then show the world. If leaving the house without an inch of makeup (don't skip sunscreen though!) makes you feel powerful, I salute you.
Men, if you must, impose it on your significant other (although I feel sorry for her). Just don't impose it on the general women population, because I don't appreciate it.
Actually this is also for the ladies out there who doesn't wear makeup and diss us who do. Also, this doesn't stop at makeup. It'll be too long a post if I continue writing.
You do you boo.
Now, this woman has stopped scrolling Facebook. At two in the morning.
"Maktub," she said, "If I am really a part of your dream, you'll come back one day."
- The Alchemist (Paulo Coelho)
A few days ago, I woke up questioning God why He hasn't answered the one prayer that I have been constantly praying for. I prayed to be filled with happiness. In my mind, I hoped that He would gift me with the man of my dreams.
I woke up angry at everything. Perhaps I was just PMSing (which turns out to be what it was). I was angry at the world. I was angry at the little birds outside who seemed to be too happy about life that particular morning.
I consider this my relapse.
I have been perfectly content with myself for the past few months, enjoying the comfort of my own voice, the company of my own presence. I was actually enjoying being busy. I felt like I could now finally take over the world. Truthfully, it really felt like that. It felt like I had the world in my hands and that whatever I choose to do with it, can only be decided by only me.
At one point, I actually don't mind going to social events alone and be around friends and potentially make new ones (although that thought is somewhat nerve wrecking). I was at Singapore Modest Fashion Weekend and I actually felt fine going out alone albeit meeting a friend at the venue. It even triggered me to attend an upcoming social event by myself, without a plus one, which is hella scary for me but whatever it is worth I have to do it.
I was also angry at the fact that suddenly, I have no job offers. I applied for every job imaginable but none came back to me. I was very frustrated too because I was tired and I wanted to just do something. I was angry at the world for having it better than me.
Until I saw a post.
It was an a-ha! moment for me.
The reason I can get through life for the past few months because I believed in this. I believed in Maktub. I believe in what has been written. My mind has been at ease knowing that whatever happened to me, was written. I am now just going through life the way I was supposed to. But how could I have forgotten this? Why was I questioning Him?
It was not until I saw this that I remembered how I managed to find peace with myself. I let go. I allowed Him to handle my life. I am at ease everyday knowing that I am where He wants me to be exactly at right now. I am at ease knowing that the good things He has promised me is probably very near. All I have to do is be patient. Be grateful.
In that moment, I accepted fate.
Everyone needs a reminder once in a while. Me, especially. I am probably still out of job because I am meant to do something else. I am still single because The One is on his way and He has promised me the best person. Every new people I meet, is a given too. They are meant to breathe life into me. It is just His way of getting me to understand the world, and myself.
This morning I woke up feeling so grateful. I still get to hear my mom making so much noise outside. I still get to hear my brother playing games in his room and laughing loudly. I still get to wake up from my sleep.
"My heart is at ease knowing that what was meant for me will never miss me,
Black has been a colour of solace to me for a few years. I resonate with the colour black and for a while, it seemed like my soul. I felt very dark and mysterious, as though I was holding on to a piece of secret. Black was also the colour of my mood for a long time. I was inclined to black for it felt natural.
Colours slowly disappeared from my life and the dark ink started to paint my life, inch by inch.
Someone once told me, "Black will not last forever."
For three years now, black was a part of me. Everyone knew me as the girl in black. It made me feel strong and powerful. In truth, black hid me. I needed to hide from the world. Wearing the darkest colour made me feel safe. Nobody will not notice me. I was afraid of colours, of life.
Then somehow, black does not appeal to me anymore. It is as if I started painting colours back into my life. I did not feel as good walking out of the door in an all black ensemble anymore. I started wearing navy, more greys and whites. Then nudes and moss green. Then pastel blue and pinks. Black is slowly becoming a distant memory.
I have a favourite cute little bag with pineapples on it. I reach out to it as often as I do with my navy hijab. Which made me wonder. Adjusting myself to tasteful print and colours may not only mean a style change. I figured it was something bigger.
When I was darkening my wardrobe, I knew I was unhappy. I was stuck and gloomy. It felt as if the colours on me were running. At one point, my style was so minimal it felt like I was done with my life. Earlier this year, I started enjoying colours and I knew I was happier.
I may have found the colours to my life again. I have finally found happiness, in myself.
It took me two years to forgive and forget the past. Three to feel happy again. I never thought this day would come but I am ready to wear yellow.
Recently, I have been obsessed with makeup. I don't know what has come to me but I have been creating looks day in and out. If you came from my Instagram, I have mentioned that I am currently using powder foundation. The search for a high coverage and affordable powder foundation with lots of recommendation was difficult. I spent days researching. Went to Sephora, bought Tarte's loose powder and ended up regretting my $50+. I then decided to stick with what I was comfortable with, which was MAC's and purchased Studio Fix Powder Plus foundation.
As we all know, MAC is not exactly famous for it's non cruelty factor. It is always nice to have something vegan and cruelty free. It is even better to know that the product that I am using is halal.
[Personal definition of halal: Makeup products which are cruelty free and all natural. Products which do not contain any animal-derived ingredients.]
When My Little Cocoon first contacted me and told me about a brand called Khadija, I was excited to learn more about it.
Khadija Cosmetics is a company from France which prides itself for producing 100% natural and vegan makeup products ranging from face to tools. Khadija Cosmetics are also certified halal by the Halal Authority Board, one of the strictest and world wide known halal certification bodies.
My Little Cocoon brings in five foundation shades to Singapore. Namely shade 9, 11, 13, 16 and 21. I use shade 11 and for reference, I am a MAC NC30. The foundation is a shade darker than my normal foundation but it is nothing highlighting can't fix. The foundation is medium to full coverage. Khadija Cosmetics have a kabuki brush meant for applying the foundation but I am still not comfortable using it yet so I am using my favourite face brush, Sigma F80. I find that by pushing the foundation into the skin, I get a lot more coverage.
At $38.20, the Khadija mineral foundation is value for your money.
I have also tried several of the loose eyeshadows and I must say that I am pretty impressed. The colour pay off is certainly pigmented and it was smooth and easy to blend. I used the pink shade all over my lids and crease, the gold glitter shade on the center of my lids and the brown as a contour shade. I like that the brown has more of a grey undertone which makes it a shadowy colour great for the cheeks. The pink pigment is actually a blush colour but who says you have to use one product for its specific purpose?
Online, My Little Cocoon has three shades of eyeshadow but if you drop by their office, you can view and swatch more colours. My favourite has to be that gold glitter pigment. Simply wet your brush and get a crazy look out of it.
I have not used the lip gloss in a look but I have tried it on and it is not sticky as the brand claims. I will probably use it as a lip topper over a lipstick shade of my choice. My Little Cocoon carries five shades in total.
I threw in a shameless selfie to show you what I achieved with all the Khadija products I have used from My Little Cocoon.
My Little Cocoon is spearheaded by two friends, Eri & Aishah. They are passionate about sharing and spreading the awareness of Cruelty Free & Halal beauty products in Singapore. They believe that animals should not suffer and die to test cosmetics or their ingredients in the name of beauty.
My Little Cocoon is not just skin deep. Through their exciting beauty events and give-back programs (Cocoon of Hope Initiatives), they are able to bring together ladies from different walks of life to discover and explore beauty from both angles- inside and out.
Talk about beauty from deep within!
Through the Cocoon of Hope Initiatives, My Little Cocoon gives back to the society by providing empowerment talks for women, animal care etc.
FYI, My Little Cocoon is the pioneer in bringing in FCC Cosmetics to Singapore!
On the 29th of April, My Little Cocoon will be having an event at The Colonial @ Scotts. There will be makeup tutorials using the Khadija foundation for different skin tones. So if you are fair or dark, be assured that everything will be covered.
Also, there will be many products from the different brands that My Little Cocoon carries which makes shopping easier that day. You can swatch the colours and test which products suit you best!
Tickets are priced at $25 per person and there is a group discount at 15% off if you purchase a minimum of 3 tickets.
Look good, feel good. I feel like that is the direction of this event. We'll meet people who are just as passionate about makeup as us and giving back to the community.
Details of event
Venue: The Colonial @ Scotts
Address: 31 Scotts Rd, Singapore 228243
Date/Day: 29 April 2017, Saturday
Time: 2pm - 6pm
Admission: SGD 25
I hope to see you there and don't forget to check out My Little Cocoon at the various sites below-
How are you? Has work been treating you well? I hope you are eating and sleeping well. I pray everyday that you are healthy and happy. That your family and friends are taking good care of you, until we meet.
Every full moon, I look up at the sky and feel better knowing that you are out there looking at the same one. We share the same universe. I don't know where you are or how you look like. I just know that I love you and that I miss you terribly. How much longer should we wait till our hearts are whole?
Before I sleep, I made sure to make doa for you. For us. I believe in the greater power and I believe in-
"What is meant for you, will reach you even if it is beneath two mountains,
What is not meant for you, won't reach you even if it is between your two lips."
No matter where in the world you are, or whatever situation you are currently in, since you are written for me, we will meet. We will, one day, see the light at the end of the tunnel. In the meantime, we shall keep on swiping right to the wrong matches until we matched each other.
Six years ago, before I fully have the hijab on, my hair was heavily subjected to chemicals and products. I was that girl who goes into the hair salon every three months to do something to her hair. I was never satisfied with a style. I would have it coloured, permed and straightened. All in a year. My hair was basically fried and damaged.
When I wore the hijab, I see no purpose in doing all those things to my hair. So I decided to take a break and give my hair a breather. Although my hair got its natural texture and colour back, something feels amiss. I wasn't taking care of my hair the way I used to. My hair was slightly coarse, dry and lifeless for many years.
So when Kaisyahs Closet asked if I would like to try Anzel Hair Marula Oil by Anzalna Nasir, I jumped at it.
Anzel Hair Marula Oil really lived up to its hype. If you haven't heard of Anzalna Nasir, where have you been? Anzalna is the beautiful Malaysian celebrity who is the envy of many. Her enviable long tresses are what every girls dream of. I am certain that if the Kardashian-Jenner clan knows of Anzalna, they would make her one of their sisters.
When Anzalna came out with Anzel Hair Marula Oil, the internet crashed. I know at least ten girls in my instagram feed who was one of the first to use it. Every review was positive. I am always very skeptical of products by or endorsed by celebrities because I do know how these things works. However I was pleasantly surprised.
Most oils for hair tends to be heavy, making my hair feels oily and icky. Believe me when I say Anzel Hair feels super light. It absorbs quickly into the hair leaving no oily residue.
Anzel Hair claims to-
Help reduce split ends
Help to promote shine
Help to boost fullness and length of hair
Non oily and non greasy
Protects hair from UV rays of the sun and/or heat from curling iron
Nourishes and restore healthy hair
I haven't used it long enough to see if it helps to boost the growth of hair but it smells amazing. My hair looks shiny without looking greasy. It made my dry hair looks like it has always been healthy.
Although the instructions on the box says to apply it to slightly damp hair, I usually apply it on dry hair every morning. I would use two to three pumps for my thick and medium length hair. I would pump it on my fingers and warm it first before applying it to the ends of my hair. Now, even on days when I don't apply it, my hair feels smoother and healthier. I can actually run through my hair smoothly.
Anzel Hair Marula Oil by Anzalna Nasir is now added into my everyday morning routine. It has successfully landed on my shelf of favourite products. It also helps that the bottle is very chic and classy.
I would show you how gorgeous my tresses are now but I guess the only one who would benefit from it would be my future husband. Lucky him!
If you want to get your hands on your very own Anzel Hair Marula Oil by Anzalna Nasir and have hair like hers for only SGD35(!), you can purchase it from-
The thought of turning 27 this year spooked me a little. No wait. Make that a lot. As a young kid, 27 always seemed old. If any of my teachers are 27, I would think that they are old.
As a teenager, I thought 27 would be fun. You get to stay out late. You get to dress up real fancy all the time. Your life is in place. You are happy. List goes on.
Upon turning 20, I must admit. I was excited for adulthood. I was after all, in an environment where most of my colleagues were not my age. Turning 20 was cherry on the cake.
Then I turned 21. Wow. Freedom. Or so I thought. Nothing changed much. But the one thing that changed drastically soon after was the number in the ones placing. I remember my birthday celebration with my colleagues and I was so excited because I was finally a real adult. You are only an adult once you turn 21, right?
Then one of them said,
"After 21, the numbers just keep increasing. Without you noticing."
I laughed it off, of course because I thought it was ridiculous. I was bent on being the most awesome adult ever lived.
I remembered nothing from then on. The years went by swiftly. Then last year, I turned 26. Today, I met my old friends and we were sitting down thinking how the years have gone by. Then it dawned on us. We are turning 27 in a few months time. And for some of the 1990 kids, you are already 27.
It is scary. I am no longer in my early 20s. I am not in my mid 20s. I am in my late 20s. Age is slowly catching up on me. Technically I am still young but I don't have the energy of my 18 year old self. I would get really tired after a whole day of something.
At 18, I went to school and have many projects. I could still handle my CCA. Reached home super late. Get into MSN till 4am and get up at 7am to go to class. I would still have the energy to do so many things.
Now all I really want is my bed.
I had a meltdown today too. The thought of turning 27 is really scaring me. I feel like I am not ready to turn a year older. I haven't achieved things. I haven't gotten material things.
I will probably have those older than me who will be reading me telling me that it's ok. Enjoy being 20s. That I am still young. But before you do, I am sure you felt like this too at one point. I am sure that this is all part of growing old.
There are 7 stages of grieve. I am currently in denial and I am clearly not handling it too well.