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Without a doubt, that’s the question I receive the MOST often: “But Stacy…what do you do with your kids when you are ____?” (cleaning the house, making the food, folding laundry, etc.). Working with kids at home isn’t the easiest thing, but it IS possible.

For the first time in my parenting career, I had help this summer. Our family friend, Lillee, came over to watch the kids for a few hours each week (Mother’s Helper type) so I could work on my two online businesses. It has been wonderful to have that help working with kids. For 10 years I didn’t have that help.

So what did I do?

It was crazy important to Barry and me, when we started having kids, to make sure they would be fine without us. We didn’t want to raise them to be DEPENDENT on us for their every need. We wanted them to be able to play if we weren’t available. That might seem cold and harsh – but for us, it made the most sense.

I never want to have to rely on having someone with me to feel comfortable or content. Sure, I love having my peeps with me – but I am also okay if I am alone. Working with kids present is something that we needed to figure out, and it is important if you want to be able to get work done while they’re around at your home too.

Start Working with Kids Around Now!

We started at a very young age with all our kids. As we worked, they were WITH US but we weren’t always focused on them. As wee bits, they would play on a blanket beside me while I worked or. We were together, but I was working. When Barry is doing a task that’s safe and reasonably quiet, it is common that he has one (or more) of the kids in his shop with him. Start NOW with your kids, no matter how young or old they are.

Ours have been taught independent play by using things like dress-up clothing, blocks, magnets, books, and art items. “Here are your markers and paper. Sit here at the table and draw. Mommy is going to go back to the counter and make rolls.” 

Babies? I held them on my lap while I worked and they played with toys. When they were old enough to sit up, they would sit beside me and play with blocks or other baby toys. Now that they are all old enough, they help me with certain things in the kitchen – and they have their own chores to do.

In the mornings, the kids don’t come out of their rooms before 7:45 unless they need to use the bathroom. Otherwise, they play quietly or read. We used a quiet morning basket to train them a bit, and now they don’t even need that.

Was this whole training process easy? Is anything easy with kids? NO. But was it worth the effort? Yes. Now at age 10, Annie can occupy herself all day with her crafts, books, and babies, if she needs to. She also loves to play with others – because we instilled a healthy balance in her. 

I see her other siblings following suit. They can play together – they can play with me – but they can also play alone. 

Always remember, you are training your kids. “Train up a child in the way they should go.” You can’t train them to need you forever. Eventually they need to fly the coop – and when they do, you still need to have purpose, vision, and passion. It’s good for your kids to see you have a drive to do other things – it teaches them to have vision of their own. 

Mama, parenting is HARD. It just is.
But, it’s also worth it. 

If you want some additional info on this topic, a while back I wrote a Q&A on being a work at home mom that might be of help. Check it out!

The post But….What Do You Do with Your Kids? appeared first on Humorous Homemaking.

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Barry, my kids, and I all love homemade waffles! It’s one of their favorite meals – and they’ll enjoy them any time of day. I have a really large double-side waffle maker. It’s a Waring Pro. But then I found this cute, smaller one for four waffles. I only paid $15 for it and I know it’s not the best quality, but I’ve had so much fun with it! So…let’s make waffles!

Whenever I make waffles, I either make the Lemon Honey Flax Waffles from Jessica Fisher’s cookbook or I modify the waffle recipe from the red Breadbeckers cookbook. I have practically all their cookbooks, but I love the recipes from the little red book. I modify one called Basic Pancake recipe and convert it to waffles. The only real change between pancake and waffle batter is that you add more oil to the waffles.

And y’all, these are some of the best waffles!

The recipe calls for buttermilk – which I don’t have on hand most of the time! My easy substitution for buttermilk is using regular milk, increasing my baking powder and omitting the baking soda. Recipes that call for baking soda need some sort of acid to help the “poofing” process take place. Instead, I use the double-acting baking powder.

Double-acting means the baking powder reacts when it hits the liquid, and then again when it hits the heat.

I like to mix my liquids all together first and then add my other ingredients. Always measure your vanilla – because you never want to use too much. Just kidding, y’all. This isn’t in the original recipe, but I like adding vanilla to everything I make. Whenever I don’t use coconut oil, I use avocado oil. It’s my second oil of choice.

You’ll notice in this recipe that it calls for 3-4 cups of milk. I realize that’s quite a range. But hear me out. As far as how much milk to use, it really depends on how old and what kind of flour you use. Now, what in the world do I mean by that?

Fresh flour absorbs moisture at a different rate than store-bought, enriched flour.

People ask if this recipe works with store-bought flour and the answer is yes! We just prefer fresh ground flour because of the health benefits. It looks just like regular flour, but it tastes sooo much better. For this recipe, I use soft white wheat flour.

I also get asked a lot about the difference between hard and soft wheat.

For quick breads, to make waffles, pancakes, etc. I use soft white wheat. But for things like bread, rolls, buns, cinnamon rolls, I recommend hard white wheat. Hard wheat has a different moisture content and works better with all of your yeast breads. When I make waffles, I add the flour a little bit at a time so I don’t add too much. Fresh flour continues to soak up the liquid as it sits.

There is never a time when I make waffles that I don’t always overfill the waffle maker.

Batter ends up oozing down the sides, all over the counter and the lid is popping open because I put too much batter in it. I know I could measure to know just how much it holds, but I’m just not that kind of cook! And it never ceases to amaze me how off I always am on my waffle maker’s batter hold capacity. I always think it will hold just a little bit more, and it always overflows.

When you’re making waffles, it’s okay to experiment.

Now when I say experiment, I don’t mean that we are adding food coloring and vinegar to see if things will explode in the waffle maker. Save that for another day! By experiment, I mean try out your batter with the first waffle to see if it’s too runny. You don’t want it to be too thick – that creates a dense, tough waffle. It’s okay to be a tough cookie, but nobody wants a tough waffle.

The good thing about waffles and pancakes is that you don’t make them all at once. It’s the opposite of cake and bread. So you can always change up the batter and add a little bit more flour (or liquid), if you aren’t happy with the outcome of the first, on your next batch!

Waffles are a great make-ahead breakfast or dinner.

My best tip for perfect make-ahead waffles: Don’t worry too much about the browning or color of the waffles when you make them initially. After you cook your waffles just shy of being done (slightly pale and still a little soft), lay them out in a single layer on a baking rack and allow them to cool completely. Then carefully place them in a bread bag to freeze. The only way to avoid freezer ice crystals is to be sure your food is 100% cool before you put it in the freezer. Toast your waffles just before serving to get a beautiful brown color and crispy texture that perfectly absorbs syrup and butter! #buttervehicle

The Best Wafles
modified from the Breadbeckers Red Cookbook
Course Breakfast, Dessert
Cuisine American
Keyword waffle, waffles
Prep Time 10 minutes
Cook Time 5 minutes
Total Time 15 minutes
Servings 12 waffles (depending on size of iron)
  • waffle iron
  • 4 large eggs
  • 1 splash vanilla
  • 3-4 cups milk depending on your flour
  • 1/2 cup avocado oil
  • 3 to 3-1/2 cups flour depending on type used
  • 4 tsp baking powder
  • 1 tsp salt
  • Preheat waffle maker (iron)
  • Whisk the eggs in a large bowl. Add the milk, oil, and vanilla and whisk well to combine.
  • Combine 3 cups flour, baking powder, and salt in a medium bowl. Slowly add to the egg mixture. If your batter is too runny, add more flour as needed.
  • Carefully spoon batter into the preheated waffle maker. Shut the lid and cook for 3-5 minutes, depending on desired finished consistency (soft or crunchy – I like to cook mine for 3 minutes so they are a little soft and pale. That way, I can toast them up later and they won't be too dry.).
  • Lay the cooked waffles in a single layer on a baking rack. Allow them to cool completely. Once cool, carefully lay them in a bread bag to freeze if you wish to store them for later.

If you’re feeling super adventurous, or happen to have some leftover bread you need to use up, you should check out my recipe for waffle french toast (yes, it is amazing at it sounds!).

The post Let’s Make Homemade Waffles! appeared first on Humorous Homemaking.

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Updated with better ingredients and easier instructions!

There is a war in my head – the War for French Toast and also the War for Waffles.  The battle is real, friends. 

One of my life goals is to actually see how many things I can cook in the waffle iron. When someone told me I could make my French Toast in there, I was ALL ABOUT THAT! This marriage of French Toast and Waffles is a beautiful thing – the yumminess of French Toast + the waffle holes for syrup. Waffle French Toast = YES!

Use What Bread You Have

I usually make this when I have bread that’s almost too far gone – not moldy but also not great for sandwiches – you know, toast bread. It works GREAT!
I’ve made it successfully with sandwich bread, cinnamon raisin bread, banana bread, just about anything goes! Also, it is super easy to double or even triple, based on your family size!

To make this treat you need bread, eggs, vanilla, milk, and cooking spray. You can use any type of bread you have – white bread, wheat bread, hot dog buns, hamburger buns, Italian bread. I’ve not tried biscuits yet, but English muffins also work great!

Simple to Make

First, heat up your waffle iron. In a dish that’s big enough for your bread to lay down in, beat your eggs. They’ve been bad. They must be beaten. Add your milk and vanilla. Mix well.  Dip your bread into the egg mixture, coating each side. Let it get good and coated, but don’t let it soak like a sponge. If you do, when you try to pick it up it will break off and fall on the counter, making a  big ole mess.

Spray the waffle iron with a cooking oil spray, and then lay the soaked bread in and shut the lid. Cook the French Toast until it’s brown. This may be a bit of trial and error. You’ll know it’s done when the toast doesn’t stick when you try to open the lid.

Waffle French Toast
The perfect combo of waffles…and…French Toast (hence the name!).
Course Breakfast, Dessert
Cuisine American, French
Keyword breakfast, french toast, waffle
Prep Time 5 minutes
Cook Time 15 minutes
Total Time 20 minutes
Servings 8 slices
  • waffle iron
  • 2 large eggs
  • 1 cup milk
  • 1/2 tsp vanilla extract
  • 8 slices bread
  • Heat waffle iron.
  • Beat eggs.
  • Add milk and vanilla.
  • Mix well.
  • Dip bread into egg mixture and lay in waffle iron. Close lid.
  • Cook until browned.
Serve with maple syrup or whipped cream.

And there you are! A fast breakfast for your family. And it tastes so much better than French Toast in the skillet. It gets done in the middle, so it’s not mushy. Mushy French Toast = yucko. Aren’t you glad I broadened your horizons? Make it today. You’ll love it! Sprinkle it with powdered sugar if you’re feeling frisky.

However, if you’re not so adventurous and want to stick to making waffles, I’ve got you covered. Check out my homemade waffles recipe.

The post Waffle French Toast appeared first on Humorous Homemaking.

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As a dad of four young kids, I’m in awe of what it takes to be a mom. I’m definitely not capable of doing what most of you moms out there accomplish. I regularly tell people that Stacy is a superhero…and I mean it. But here’s the thing, ladies – you are way too hard on yourself. Every mom fail matters!

However, using someone’s cheery social media feed as your standard, you’ve decided that you can’t measure up and that you’re a complete disaster. In doing that, you’ve set an unrealistic expectation that you literally will never be able to live up to.

Here’s the thing: we need you to fail.

We need you to fail, to falter, to mess up, and then get up and try again. Your kids need to see the difficult days and watch you persevere through them. Mom fail does not equal failing your kids. Your husband needs to hear you complain about a challenging day and how you made it through. And side note: husbands, when she does this – just listen. She doesn’t want you to fix it. Trust me on this.

John Maxwell wrote, in Beyond Talent, “There are two kinds of people in this world: those who want to get things done and those who don’t want to make mistakes.” Moms, we desperately need you to make mistakes because, whether you realize it or not, you are primarily the ones getting things done in the world today. If it weren’t for your mom fails, we would not be where we are today.

I don’t want to be negative toward men, or toward women who aren’t moms. I have a biased perspective. However, consider this (because you know this is true): once a mom has decided to get something done, stand back – ain’t nothin’ gonna stop her! Give her some coffee, and promise her some chocolate and a nap later, and she can move mountains!

Be encouraged.

You are an amazing group of ladies who are literally changing the world every day as you pour into your families and find out how strong you are through the challenges you overcome. You need to mess up your kids just enough where they almost need therapy (only slightly kidding). We need your burned dinners, your failed Pinterest crafting attempts, your chaos, your sometimes-crazy ideas, and yes, even your occasional “emotional release” (a.k.a. uncontrollable crying fit).

Why? Because we need you.

We need you to show up, and to love us. You are the teachers to our next generation. We need your innovation. Your generosity and selflessness are an example to us all. We need your friendship. And know that it is possible to survive busy seasons without losing your mind.

We need you more than we ever have.

So…keep on failing, okay?

The post Why Every Mom Fail Matters appeared first on Humorous Homemaking.

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Let me preface this by saying I am not a doctor – shocker, right? I’m definitely not a psychiatrist, psychologist, or any sort of expert in these types of things. But I have done a lot of reading on the topic of conscious language and have all sorts of thoughts to share. Spoiler Alert: Conscious Language has changed a LOT (for the better) for us.

The mind has thousands of conscious thoughts per day. But it has an excess of 50,000 subconscious thoughts a day. When something pops into your subconscious brain, you have about 30 seconds to change it before it implants and becomes something you actually believe. So if you can change how you think and change what you say, it can actually change the outcome of your day.

Conscious language revolves around the idea that you are constantly positive with yourself and the people around you.

As an example, I could complain every morning about having to wake up early. “Ugh, I’m so tired and I don’t want to get up and go to work.” Or I could get up and say, “I’m a little sleepy, but I am excited to get up to seek my fortune.”

It’s a just a minor change in the thought and words, but it can make a huge difference. As a mom who stays at home with her kids all day, I have the tendency to want to whine about my kids’ behavior, my attitude, and/or my homemaking (or homeschooling) tasks. And to be honest, some days just suck. But you don’t always have the opportunity to change your circumstances. You can, however, absolutely change your attitude!

This is not prosperity gospel, “name it and claim it” kind of stuff. People often think talking to yourself like this is “new age” or some weird thing only crazy people do. Consider this: even the Bible talks about the importance of our thoughts (and words). “Think on things that are true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, praiseworthy” (Philippians 4:8).

My verse for the year – from Proverbs 23:7: “As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he“.

The whole fake it until you make it thing has something to it that rings true for all of us. Faking it for a while often just gets us through the times that are hard and when you come out on the other side…it’s all good! Constantly reminding ourselves to have a positive attitude and to consciously use words that are positive instead of negative can make a huge difference.

Here are a few examples of phrases to get rid of because they can lead to negative thoughts:

  • “I hope to.”
  • “I intend to.”
  • “I’m going to try.”
  • “I’ll pray about it.”

All of those put off action and positive thinking. Instead, say things like:

  • “I am.”
  • “I will.”
  • “Yes, I can.”
  • “I have.”
Think…and Speak…Truth.

Ask yourself some of these questions: What steps do I need to take now to reach a goal I have for the future? What skills are required of me that I don’t currently possess? What step(s) can I take TODAY toward the goals I have? Those are the ways you can turn your thoughts into conscious language.

One thing Barry and I have started doing is using the phrase “cancel, cancel, delete, delete!” If we start down a negative path, the other person will call us out by saying this little phrase. It’s comical now and a good reset for us to keep from being negative. We’ve given each other permission to call the other person out.

How can you apply Conscious Language to your life?

Speak lots of truth and scripture to yourself. Speak life over your friends and family. Change how you think. Turn around your thoughts and put them in a positive light instead of negative. Find the good in every circumstance. You can change things just by changing how you think. And y’all, this has changed my parenting and my marriage for the better!

It’s all about your attitude. I know so many people who are down on themselves. A lot of times you are hard on yourself for no good reason. We are all flawed, messed up people. And the things you think are ultimately the things you say and do. Get rid of the I hope and I might. Believe that you can and you will.

Also remember if you are around overly negative people, it will sometimes transfer and affect you. The Bible says in 1 Corinthians 15:33, “Do not be deceived: for bad company corrupts good character.” The best advice I can give you…go find a cancel, cancel, delete, delete buddy! Find someone who can help you STOP the negative thoughts and stay on a positive track.

What thoughts or questions do you have about this idea of conscious language?

The post Conscious Language: What it is and How it Works appeared first on Humorous Homemaking.

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Guest post by Lindsey Hale, author of the recently-released book, Lifted: How to Ditch the Fear, Obligation and Guilt and Live Your Best Life, available now!

The World’s “Okayest Life” is not okay.

How on earth does she get everything done? Is it really possible to have a healthy body, marriage and family, organized home, and run a little side hustle without cloning yourself? Maybe you are like the old me who thought that “successful women” who “had it all” must be super heroes or at very least born lucky.  I would start towards a goal, like getting debt free, I’d do all the research, get the budget all set up, and then I would hit a major bump in the road and that was it! I quit! These kind of goals aren’t for people like me! Guess I’ll just keep on getting by and living the world’s “okayest” life. 

I simply wanted to stay home with my children. But I was scared to death to try one of those home-based businesses. I knew I had started and quit a million other things in life and was fairly certain this endeavor would be no different. In a moment of desperation, I asked myself, “Am I doing this (or not doing this) because of fear, obligation, or guilt?” That one question made me go for it. As a result, over a decade later, I can say my life has truly changed.  Since then I have been leading a team of thousands of women and recently released a book called Lifted: How to Ditch the Fear, Obligation and Guilt and Live Your Best Life. In it, I go into detail on how you too can find your best life by asking yourself that question!

What about you?

How many times have you just wanted to quit? You feel as if you’ve given “it” (whatever it is) everything you’ve got. The logical next step is to walk away before matters get worse.

Or is it?

After coaching hundreds of women to success in business, marriage, parenting, and relationships, I have found that those who see their goals to completion and who are living their best life have two major things in common.

#1 Don’t Go It Alone

Want to conquer that goal that feels nearly impossible? Want to be one of those successful women? Whether you are trying to accomplish a big goal in business, get organized, cook healthier meals, loose weight, run a marathon, or practice patience with your children; don’t do it alone! Generally speaking, women love community!

Those who succeed are no exception.

Successful women have someone by their side to support and guide them. Because we are all human, and will have days that are difficult or seem downright impossible. Having an accountability partner can nudge us to show up even when we don’t want to, or remind us of how far we have come when all we see is how far we have left to go. When successful women stumble or feel lost (and we all stumble), they seek help from someone who will pull them get back up again. It doesn’t matter if that person is a spouse, a trusted friend or mentor, as long as you are comfortable sharing your big goal and all the successes and failures along the way.  This should be your biggest fan!

#2 Just Ask!

The second attribute of all successful women is that they ask for what they want and what they need. In our society, discrepancies still exist between what is socially acceptable for a man versus a woman when it comes to how we work and pursue our goals. If a man asks for what he wants and makes quick decisions, he is viewed as being strong and in charge. When a woman is decisive enough to ask for what she wants, she is sometimes labeled as overbearing or pushy.

The truth is, a lot of women worry that asking a direct question makes them pushy! We have all experienced pushy people, and we know nothing feels worse than feeling like you have to do something you don’t really want to do. Pushy is when you ask for something and insist that the other person says yes, even if doing so puts that person in a bind. Pushy is really good for you and only you. So how do you know for sure if you are being too assertive?

Stop and ask yourself…

Is the request selfish, and is the other person free to say no? If your request comes out of a desire to advance without regard to other needs, you need to check your motives. However, if you’re like most women I know, your desire is to improve the world around you, not to push your ideals and selfish motives on it.

How often are you burying your real questions because you are worried your requests will make you appear high maintenance or too assertive? As a result, have you been keeping your wants, needs, and desires tucked into that dark corner, hiding your talents and gifts? From this moment forward, let’s start asking for exactly what we want or need – successful women do.

Be specific.

Try removing the softeners like “let me know” or “I just wanted to check.” Let’s ask boldly! “Let me know when you can meet for coffee” isn’t the same as, “I think I’d enjoy some company. Would you like to grab coffee with me tomorrow?” It is direct; it leaves no room for misinterpretation. If you don’t share how you feel and ask the real questions in your heart, you’ll never know what’s possible. If you ask and the answer is no, nothing changes. But if you ask and the answer is yes, everything could change.

Girlfriend, not only are you capable of having your best life, you deserve it! So this time, don’t quit on yourself. Go after that big audacious goal and this time, own it! It’s all yours!

Lindsey Hale is a wife, mom, and top leader at Thirty-One Gifts (and most recently, the author of Lifted: How to Ditch the Fear, Obligation and Guilt and Live Your Best Life ). She has an imperfect, messy, awesome life, and is passionate about teaching others how to create a life they can love! You can learn more about Lindsey at http://www.lindseyhale.org/.

The post What Successful Women Do Differently appeared first on Humorous Homemaking.

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Deep thoughts with Stacy… does anyone else ever wonder why it isn’t cinnamon roles and casserolls instead of cinnamon rolls and casseroles? File that under “pointless things Stacy ponders”. LOL. But seriously, today I want to talk about reheating food – specifically about reheating cinnamon rolls and casseroles.

We love having cinnamon rolls as a special treat on weekend mornings. But this Momma does NOT love getting up 4 hours early to make them! So what’s the solution? You guessed it – freeze and reheat!

I love making cinnamon rolls in advance and simply reheating them on a busy weekend morning.

If you’re just waiting a day or two, then you can always just refrigerate them. Then whenever you are ready to eat, just pull them from the fridge and bake in a 350 degree oven for 5-8 minutes. BUT if you want to make them more than a few days ahead of time, the freezer is your best bet. People ask me all the time how long they last in the freeze. What kind of question is that?! I promise you will eat these cinnamon rolls long before it comes to that.

Over the years, I have experimented quite a bit with freezing yeast rolls and breads.

What can I freeze? What can’t I freeze? At which stage in the process do different things freeze best? I tried it all – we’re talking everything from cinnamon rolls to sandwich bread to hamburger buns. In all of this instances, freezing the dough before baking was never successful. I mean, it was edible, but I never had success with the second rise.

I found that when I bake something from start to finish and then freeze, I have consistently great results!

There are a few tips and tricks I’ve learned in my years of freezing baked goods that help to achieve the best possible bread, cinnamon rolls, etc. Some people suggest to cook things until they are slightly under done, but in my experience, this is not necessary. I always cook my baked goods, casseroles, bread or rolls completely. Then I allow them cool completely.

For baked goods like cinnamon rolls, baked oatmeal, bread, etc. the best way to avoid those “freezer burn” looking ice crystals is to allow your baked goods cool completely on the counter. If you don’t you will see that freezer burn looking stuff. Then when I want to thaw a bread, muffin, or baked oatmeal, I pull it from the freezer and sit it out on the counter the night before. In the morning, it will be totally thawed and ready to reheat.

Then to reheat from frozen, you just bake for 5-8 minutes in a 350 degree oven or until they are warmed thru. If your oven runs a little bit cold, you might have to cook a tad bit longer. I always start the timer at 5 minutes and add a few more as needed. And y’all… these cinnamon rolls are nice and gooey. I know you might not believe me, but I am serious these cinnamon rolls will have the same taste and texture as if they were freshly baked. Seriously!

The thawing and reheating process works pretty much the same way for a savory meal or casserole.

Just like baked goods, you will want to cook your casseroles completely – until they are all the way done. Then you will need to let your casseroles or savory meals cool on the counter until it comes to room temperature. I know some people worry about things coming to room temperature and growing bacteria. But I promise y’all – if you just let it come to room temperature you have nothing to worry about! Just let it sit on the counter for about 1-2 hours and then move it to the refrigerator to cool completely overnight.

Allowing your baked goods and casseroles to rest in the fridge overnight before you freeze will majorly cut down on ice crystals.

In the morning or 8 hours or so later, pull your casserole out of the fridge and wrap it thoroughly and place in a jumbo freezer bag. I love the two gallon bags because they hold a large casserole really well. But I always wrap the casserole before it goes into the freezer bag. That way your dish get two layers of protection from the elements of the freezer.

When you want to thaw something like a casserole – it is not safe to thaw it overnight on the counter.

And since you have to thaw it in the refrigerator, it will take more time than baked goods. You cannot expect it to be thawed in just a few hours or even overnight – especially if you’ve got a thick casserole like chicken spaghetti casserole or something. I take my casseroles out a few days in advance of when I want to eat them.

I promise you a big ol’ casserole will not thaw overnight in the fridge.

If we want to eat something Friday night, I would need to pull it out no later than Thursday morning in order to ensure it thaws completely. You can cook things from frozen, but I find that the finished product isn’t as delicious when you do it that way. It dries out weirdly in some spots and doesn’t cook fast enough in others.

I hope somewhere in all those random facts you gained some good tips! Do you have any to share? Drop your thoughts in the comments!

The post Kitchen Tips: Reheating Cinnamon Rolls (and Casseroles) appeared first on Humorous Homemaking.

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Before we get started, let’s be clear…this isn’t a passive-aggressive rant on someone who has been mean to me, or some judgmental sermon about a company, cause, or political organization. Instead, this is a common-sense guide to dealing with negativity in your life, whether it is online or face-to-face. For some reason, a lot of our society has forgotten its politeness, and often, when someone disagrees with something you say or do, they immediately get ugly. Let’s talk about how to deal with all of that, shall we?

I hear negative things all the time. People don’t like that I homeschool or use Abeka. They don’t like that we like bread and carbs and wheat. People don’t like reformed theology. Sometimes people are negative about essential oils and natural medicine. People are negative about guns. It seems like when it comes to anything and everything – people often have negative things to say. But I have had to learn to laugh it off. Or unload it on Barry. But laughing is best.

You cannot let the negativity and opinions of others bring you down. 

For every opinion you hold, there is someone who holds the opposite opinion. No matter what stance you take, you will NEVER please everyone.  But keep in mind that there are certain people in your life who you should try to please. Know who they are and don’t be swayed by the negativity of people who haven’t earned that right.

Let’s say someone goes online and posts about something she is really excited about…let’s say a bread machine. She is so excited about her new bread machine! But people start commenting negatively on her post. Maybe they post something about how dangerous gluten is and what a waste of time making bread is. People she hasn’t seen since elementary school or talked to in 10, 20, or more years come out of the woodwork with negative opinions.

Should she listen to these negative opinions? Does she need to pay attention to all the voices that fill her feed? Should she let these people who don’t have the role of “truth teller” in her life influence her? NO. You shouldn’t ever make decisions based on everybody’s opinion. But let’s say her spouse, has a strong opinion about this. That’s a whole different story. As her spouse, his opinion DOES carry more weight.

What do you do when you have negative people who won’t hush!?

Online, you have the magical ability of blocking people, muting them, or simply ignoring their posts. This does not mean that you should get rid of all the people who disagree with you. There are lots of people who I don’t agree with. I like to learn from them and get an understanding of their perspective by having civil discussions. Does this mean they change my mind? Probably not. But it’s a healthier way of handling differing opinions in your life AND challenges you to be sure about what you believe.

We each get to decide for ourselves what and who is not important in our lives. There are people who you can disagree with in a healthy way and others you can’t. We all need at least a few people in our lives who disagree with us in a way that is not going to tear us down or shut us down.

You can disagree with others and still be friends. 

The Bible says, do not be deceived – bad company corrupts good character. (1 Corinthians 15:33) Do not spend time with people who are negative and bring you down. You become like the people you spend the most time with. You need to realize that if there are negative people in your life, it is very likely that you can take on some of those traits. There are friendships that you have to let go of because their negativity affects your health as a person.

What if the negative person in your life is a parent, sibling, or even a spouse??

I am blessed that no one in my family is super negative. But whether it’s a close family member, friend, or even a random stranger, there are boundaries. To a certain extent, those boundaries must not be crossed by anyone. If there is negativity coming from anyone around me, including close friends or family, I do not allow it. I am not ashamed to protect myself and my family from what I know will do us harm.

That said, Barry is so good at reminding me not to let negative thoughts other people have bring me down. Because this isn’t their life! You can’t let their negative opinions and comments have influence over your thoughts and decisions.

On the other hand, what happens if you are the negative one? Give someone you love and who loves you the right to call you on it. And if they do call you on it…LISTEN.

Before you get defensive, LISTEN.

Conscious Language comes into play here! We’ve got to start focusing on the positive. There is no real benefit in spending too much time dwelling on the negative. This is true both within our own hearts, as well as getting caught up in the negativity of those around us. Be positive and speak words of encouragement and truth to yourself and others.

Positivity will 100% change your attitude.

What in the world is the purpose of a pep really or coach’s halftime pep talk? You know that your emotions change when something builds you up and encourages you. Be the person that builds up and kick negativity to the curb. Never forget how much power your words have!

What are your tips for dealing with negativity?

The post Dealing with Negativity appeared first on Humorous Homemaking.

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