I am wondering a few things..
I took my first dose today and feel nothing. Zip zilch zero.
And not noticing even subtly anything about my day thusfar being affected.
Even the usual lack of appetite - not- I'm really hungry lol
Every other time I've taken it I've felt SOMETHING - even if it's not obvious or anywhere near the right dose for me i notice something. But today - nothing. Like i never took it.
I hadn't eaten yet so it was on an empty stomach (well, i had herbal tea...fruit tea? Over the hour prior to taking)
And it's not a new script. So nothing different about the med.
What could cause this?
Also, anyone else when first starting ritalin find it affected their sleep even when taken early in the day? Or not past 2-3 pm.
And it's not just about being awake all night, but even if i fall asleep it's not great sleep - i wake more often and feel like there's stimulants still in my system.
does this go away with time?
And please, I don't want generic answers about YMMV and everyone is different. And give it time. I get all that. I'm asking here because I'm curious to hear if others had these problems and if they went away with time, and/or dosage changes, and/or if it persisted, etc.
P.s. I also read about stimulants lowering testosterone levels. Is that just in men or does that happen in women too? And is it all stimulants or just some?
P.s.s. Also - on the heels of my other post - anyone else find their second dose is useless compared to the first - why is that and how did you over come it - if you did? Or did you maybe change to concerta and find that was not a problem with that medication? Or does concerta have the same issue of less efficacy over the day? And if you've tried different meds, is it only ritalin that has this problem with less efficacy with successive dosages?
Been spending a lot of E time. She does go to preschool (public, social emotional, self directed, play based; its solid). E is there for several total hours a day. It's also integrated classrooms, with kids with behavioral and developmental disabilities, with a highly diverse student population--bonus: over 50% of teachers are women of color. Hoping to get her into k at the civil rights academy here. In another three years she'll be able to volunteer with me at Glide or St Anthony's. She turns four on Friday.
M is well. He's pushing hard for his elite private school to take firm positions on social justice issues. He's got an uphill battle. I take so many meds (80 mg Prozac, 300 clozaril, 15 zyprexa, 1,000 mg metformin, 2 mg klonopin, 60 mg adderall xr, plus PRNs) and it's been ok since adding back ADHD treatment.
Basically I spend my time
Running every AM at 5:00
Home by 6:30 AM
Take E to preschool (Outer RIch --> Castro)
Drop off by 8:00/30 AM
go to something mental health related or volunteer related (writing copy for the coalition on homelessness, mostly).
10:00 AM more pills
Go home by noon if E's with me. Wander maybe if not
2:00 PM usually have a volunteer related or mental health related thing
3:00 PM yet again, pills
Pick up E from school by 5:30 PM
6:30/7:00 ish PM eat
7:00/7:30 PM meds
>9:00 PM bed
It's boring in its own way, but it's consistent, which I really need.
I'm scared ****less, so I'm kinda just accepting the meds and the diagnoses. Nevertheless, I messed up my meds for six days taking 5 mg instead of 15 mg of one of two main medications. The last time this happened for 7-10 days I ended up spending *my birthday* of all days in the psych hospital. Fun fact, I've been inpatient every holiday that's publicly celebrated at some f. I always missed something.
My friend's death is weighing on me.
Obvious it's bringing up Esh's death, who, those of who know his playful hypomanic phases, he was A LOT of fun. I loved hanging out with him on FaceTime just for like, living out our days being able to talk to each other. Then the mixed states and hallucinations took over.
The thing about J is that she had the *exact same* reasons to stay
I just saw her in December and she was, like, as long as I'm never manic again I can handle the depression
But she still shot herself 29 jan
Her 3.75 year old won't have her own memories of them playing together