Dealing with parents divorcing isn’t something easy to go through at any age. I’m here to post things that can help you relate and to know you are not going through this alone and if you ever need anyone to talk to then just send me a message.
I’m 16/my parents are divorcing. My whole life I’ve moved back and forth between states and finally we were going to settle down. I believed them and got comfortable enough to put myself out there and be in a relationship but because of the divorce I have to move out of state again. I’m happy here and have an amazing boyfriend who had been my best friend for years(even before I moved here). don’t want to say I hate my parents but”mad” isn’t a passionate enough word to describe how I feel rn
It sounds like what’s making you frustrated is the constant lack of stability you have had to face since you were little.
I also had to move often and attend many schools.
New things are stressful for virtually everyone. Especially moving, which is commonly considered one of the most stressful things out there.
People always come and go anyway, even if you stay in one place or
nothing major happens. It happens naturally over time with friends and even close
Have courage and face each challenge one by one.
Improvise and adapt and eventually you will gain a sense of stability.
Yesterday night my dad told my mum
he wants a divorce. They separated when I was 5 but I don’t remember it
well. I’m 19 now and I feel like I should have seen it coming but it
hurts so bad I feel sick at the idea of them not together. My mum even
took her rings off. I’m praying and praying my dad comes home and tells
her he didn’t mean it. I should be mature about it but my mum is
throwing out memorable things and I’m terrified. I’m scared and I’ve
cried for hours because I don’t know what to do
I’m so sorry to hear about your parents.
I was a little confused at first by your message because your parents already separated yet still chose to live together all this time. It seems like they decided to still stay together for your sake. It also sounds like they were good parents and raised you well. If this is true, your parents really love you. Most parents would never do what they did.
There is nothing to be afraid of. What’s happening is heartbreaking, but it’s beyond your control.
The good thing is is that you are 19 and an adult. If they separated for real back then when you were 5, your life would’ve been totally different.
Focus on your future and how to become successful, and minimize dependency on your parents. If you ever need someone to talk to, message me and I will respond asap and I can even give you my e-mail or number.
Is it wrong for me to be angry with my mother for getting a secret boyfriend before my parents divorce is even finalized? She hides her phone and goes away for the weekend to see him without ever telling us the truth. I use to look up to my mom, now I just feel sad whenever I’m around her.
What you’re feeling is completely natural and not wrong at all.
Usually it’s the young daughter that’s hiding her phone, sneaking out to see her boyfriend and making mom upset, right?
That just illustrates how ridiculous she’s being. Your mother has a responsibility as a parent yet is acting like a teenage girl and only thinking of herself. Who wouldn’t be angry? She’s being selfish and a fool.
She also must be really hurt by this divorce and how her life has turned out. Her boyfriend is her escape from reality and the agony she’s dealing with. It doesn’t justify at all but it might explain why she’s acting like this.
Distance yourself emotionally from her or else you’ll just get further disappointed. You don’t have to be sad or angry with her anymore, it will only suck your energy and lead you to destruction.
One of the reasons why she has a strong effect on your emotions is simply because you regularly see each other. I recommend avoiding her as much as possible.
Out of sight, out of mind.
And when you have to interact with her, remain calm and diplomatic.
I also recommend creating a sanctuary that you can retreat to and soothe yourself whenever times get tough. If you have a room, make it cozy. It doesn’t have to be an actual place either, it can be your phone or laptop.
Focus on your future now. Move forward and keep going. If you rise up, what happens below will feel insignificant.
I’m so sorry with what you’re dealing with right now, we’ve all been there. Feel free to message me whenever you need to.