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The One Thing That Scares Men Away More Than Anything …

By Renee Slansky

Here’s running. Again. Only this time you are scratching your head wondering what the heck went wrong?

Everything started off so well, he seemed interested and made an effort, the first, the second date went really well. But now he’s pulled back, gone cold and distant and you just know that it’s not going to end as you had hoped.

Instantly you start to dissect everything right down to the text conversations, his actions and the last few dates. It just doesn’t make sense, you are a high value, strong, independent woman who knows her worth …so why then did he pull back?

You were honest and laid everything on the table about what you wanted and needed, you help planned the date and offered lots of suggestions and reached out to him because you don’t play games …but now he’s running. Why?

This is a scenario that I see played over again and again. Strong, confident women who know their worth still struggling with attracting a man that wants to stay.

And before we start blaming the men, there is one thing I will say. Men want to commit. They want to be with a woman who knows her worth and independence. So why then does the two not add up.

You see there are several things that make men run, but there is one thing above all of them that will make them pull back and no longer invest in you, and that is simply that he doesn’t feel good about himself around you.

Let me explain; men just like women, seek to find and be with someone that they can not only have a connection with, but also walk away feeling like life is better with that person in their life.  The woman they eventually commit to is the woman that makes them feel that who they are is not only enough but enhanced.

And if you are a high value woman, chances are you are looking for a man with similar standards; a leader and someone who has direction and living a purposeful life. Or in what some may call an Alpha male.

In most cases these types of men we are attracted to are men who are only going to recognise if the woman is the right one by how he feels about himself when he is with her, not purely by just how much he likes or loves her.  

Men are hunting for their teammate, and if the woman he is dating doesn’t make him feel like he is the best version of himself with her …then his instincts will kick in and he will pull back.

So how then can we be THAT woman? The one that sends him into overdrive and makes him crazy to claim you as his one and only?

Well here are a few quick ways:

Allow him to lead

Being a strong woman is an amazing attribute to a relationship, however it can also be our Achilles heel. This is because naturally we try to take the lead instead of allowing the man to do it. Men want to know that they are in charge, that they are able to lead the date and be the man.

One of the key things to remember when dating is to embrace your feminine energy more, so that he feels he can step into his masculine. The right man wants to do the organising, leading, chasing and protecting , so give him an opportunity to do that by stepping back.

Ask for his help

A simple way to make a man feel good about himself when he is with you is by asking his opinion or help on something. Instantly he will want to go into hero and serving mode, because his aim is to prove that you need  him. Men need to be needed, women need to be loved…see the difference there?

Come across as nurturing

Even if you are a high powered boss babe, you can still come across as a nurturing female simply through your actions, tone of voice and body language. A man’s first love is his mother who by default is nurturing him. This isn’t about turning into his mother, but instead triggering the instinct in him to feel loved when he is  with you.

Use words of affirmation

One of the easiest ways to a man’s heart and self-evaluation when he is with you, is simply by using words of praise.  He wants to know that who he is, is appreciated, needed, wanted and enough when he is with you. If you criticise, compete or don’t affirm his positive actions he does for you, then there is no way he will stick around.

Ladies going on a date isn’t just about communicating what you want, it’s also about understanding what men NEED in order to want to take things further with you.

And a lot of the time the reason why even the good ones get scared away is because we self-sabotage our chances before we have even had a chance to communicate how wonderful we are.

How to find Renee

Social media links:

URL: www.thedatingdirectory.co

Twitter: @reneeslansky

Instagram: @the.dating.directory @reneeslansky

Facebook:www.facebook.com/reneeslansky , www.facebook.com/ thedatingdirectory

Renee Slansky is an Australian dating and relationship coach, speaker, author  and founder of Australia’s number 1 dating blog www.thedatingdirectory.co . Her heart for people to experience fulfilling and healthy relationships has seen her feature on some of the largest online publications and dating sites in the world including The Huffington Post, The Good Men Project, eHarmony, Plenty of Fish and Badoo. As a dating guru, Renee can be seen and heard on the TV and radio regularly and hosts her own online TV channel.

Her teachings are all about offering practical advice, support and solutions to real life issues in love. Think of her as your modern day Fairy Godmother!

The post The One Thing That Scares Men Away More Than Anything appeared first on Dating and Relationship Coach for Women.

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What Turns Men Off In Women

So you just met this hot guy who just moved in across the street, he obviously likes you and has even asked you on a date this Friday. You really like this one, and so does your mom who would take anyone in provided he isn’t Tommy your ex. Even your dad who seldom displays any interest in your dating life seems to really like this accidental crush of yours. At the moment, everything is going great, except you really want to keep this one, this time.

A lot of things can turn a man off, especially in times when you are trying “desperately” to get him to like you. While turn offs are based mostly on the personal preferences of the man involved, there are some inaccurate generalizations by the female population which the majority of men abhor. Some of which I will discuss in detail as you move forward:

  1. Nagging

Now, this is number one for a reason, and I assure you there is not an atom of bias in placing this irritating habit in the top spot. While you might be able to get into a relationship with a habit like this, in the majority of cases, you end up alone after the elastic limit of your m

an has been reached. In all my years, as a human being, I have never met two men who put up with a nagging woman till the very end. Regardless of how tolerant he is, at some point, he’s going to try to avoid you, and it’s a downward spiral from then on. This doesn’t mean no one likes you if you are a chronic nagger, but to keep your man, you need to make efforts to show that you are not all about the nagging life. I can assure you, he knows you are making an effort, he just might not say it.

  1. Playing candy crush on your mobile while talking:

This turns off not only a man, it turns off friends, acquaintances, Doctors, you name it. Perhaps you may think, he doesn’t notice you playing or chatting away on your cell phone while he’s trying to have a decent conversation with you. What you do not realize is that a larger percentage of human communication is nonverbal, and as such he notices the very moment your mind wanders off his boring gist about his mother’s incredible culinary skills. Perhaps that explains why he never called you after that first date. Whenever you are in a meeting, formal or informal put your phone on silent and keep it away, jeez!!! you humans are confused creatures I tell you confused.

  1. Being a thot

Shocking right? well no, if all you can bring to the table is a vagina, then how are you better than the 3.7 billion women in the world? Ok, let’s say you have some mad acrobatic capabilities in bed and maybe you’re a goddess in the dominant role? Imagine the number 3.7 billion in contention, all having been born with similar capabilities. You need to bring something else to the table, you need to bring your smartness, you need to be intellectually sound, learn to play an instrument, sing a song, perform a surgery, join the army, ride a horse. Just don’t bring only a vagina to the table lest the fate of the man who put all his eggs in one basket befalls you.

  1. Be yourself

The truth is that most men can smell a lie a mile away especially as most of them are incredible liars themselves, so quit trying to be who you are not. Stop trying to put up a facade just to impress a man. it shows a serious lack of self-worth and can be irritating, especially to the gentle, classical music listening, abs popping, muscle bobbling, handsome looking, 6 figures having a guy you may have been seeing in your dreams since the 6th grade. A caveat, however, is that being yourself and doing dumb stuff are divided by a very thin line. Being yourself doesn’t directly translating to screwing all the boys in your office because “yourself likes the D”. Being yourself means taking corrections and presenting a better you than yesterday.

 5.  Defending him physically

Now this one is confusing even for guys, but it sure holds true. Ever tried beating up your brother’s bully, especially your elder brother? Well, he didn’t display any signs of happiness, did he? Here’s why. Men are groomed to be providers and protectors, if you are protecting him from stuff he’s supposed to be protecting you from (mostly physical aggression), he’s going to feel bad, I guarantee it. It’s a weird wiring in the head of men, but it holds true. So even if you have a black belt in jujitsu, contain yourself until a time when it is absolutely necessary to kick ass, sensei says ***bows**

The post What Turns Men Off In Women appeared first on Dating and Relationship Coach for Women.

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What Does It Take To Fix A Broken Relationship?

Usually, happy relationships start like this. A guy meets a girl. The girl is going for her goals and ambitions. She has a loving circle of family and friends. She loves and enjoys her life. The guy is smitten by her! He thinks wow! What a happy, independent and incredible woman! Let me find out more!

He starts pursuing her, he sweeps her off her feet. The girl is a bit unavailable, she’s interested but has her priorities straight. However, he keeps going for her and doesn’t take no for the answer. He keeps taking her out, he is fun to be with. He acts like a total gent being caring, nice, protective, charming, generous etc…Eventually, she falls for him. I mean who wouldn’t a total prince charming right?

However, a few months later this is what happens.

The girl is so smitten by him that she nearly get’s addicted to him. She lets go of her priorities. She starts to cancel on her family and friends in order to spend more time with him. As he is just so much fun! She starts to please him in every single way she can. As she just wants him to like her more. She is scared to express her opinion if it doesn’t match with his. As she is scared that he may not like that.

He, however, starts to slowly lose interest in her…Why?

When a woman starts acting like this…Another word for it is – as a doormat

And the guy starts taking her for granted. Why?

Because this is not what he fell for! A man is not looking for a pleaser or someone that he can walk all over. Or take for granted. He is looking for a woman with a personality. A woman who can stand on her own two feet, who has an opinion, knows how to make herself happy. Knows what she wants and goes for it! And this was the girl that he originally fell for… He fell for a Woman of High Value and once she changed into a Doormat… Guess what he is not happy and he is losing interest fast.

Now, what will it take to fix this?!

It will take going back to remembering your value, your worth. It will take putting your dignity and not the man first! It will take controling your emotions and getting your life back!

Now the problem happens…when a man is used to walking all over a woman and taking her for granted. Having her under his thumb and acting whichever way he pleases. To fix it takes a huge amount of PATIENCE, DISCIPLINE and SELF CONTROL. However, it is possible and in many cases worth it!

How to do it?! Please watch my YouTube Channel where I’m giving all my advice free on how to get valued and respected in your relationship again.

Follow me on my private Instagram ladies_relationship_coach where I’m answering dating & relationship questions during my  Instagram live twice a week!

Or join my Private Women only Facebook Group Which is called HIGH-VALUE WOMEN share your questions in the group and get the answers from the ladies who are in the same boat as you x

Or just book me as a coach and let me guide through the whole process while holding our hand at it!

The post What Does It Take To Fix A Broken Relationship? appeared first on Dating and Relationship Coach for Women.

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A Guest post reflecting on her friend’s relationship after she has been coached by me:

Should You Give Your All In A Relationship?

Hello ladies! I have an ongoing story that I would like to share with you.

A very good friend of mine has been in a relationship for the past 3 years. I know all of her ex’s and why her relationships didn’t work out before. She is now in a what she calls a „happy and healthy relationship“. Sadly in many cases, girls get blinded by love in their relationships. And don’t even notice how they start acting like doormats. They don’t notice how they put their partner first and neglect themselves.

So, back to the story… I see her regularly and for past three years have seen how she is throwing away all of her dreams and values. She is almost finished with University and is not thinking about where she is gonna work afterward, because she is- quote „going to depend on my boyfriend because he knows what best for me“. …Ladies you and only YOU know whats best for you. Because you know yourself best! Don’t let your man wrap you around his little finger and make you the puppet that he wants you to be. She always wanted to get married and then have children. This was very important to her. Now she just wants to have children and sees marriage as just a piece of paper. Sadly all of these views are not her views but her boyfriend’s views. She has lost or better say thrown away her opinion and values. Probably not even knowingly. She is so manipulated that she does not even see her mistakes. Love makes us blind!

Story to be continued…

But for now ladies, please do not forget your goals, your life values and important people in your life. Stay true to yourself! Be who you want to be! Reach your goals and ambitions! Your love should be supportive of this and not try to change who you are or how you see the world. If you don’t respect yourself your partner won’t either, and such relationships are sadly bound to doom.

The post Should You Give Your All in a Relationship? appeared first on Dating and Relationship Coach for Women.

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From A Doormat To A High-Value Woman!

I had a friend…

Her relationship was completely broken, the guy was mean, disrespectful, taking her totally for granted. She was asking for my help and even I said to her Hun your relationship is so bad I really think it would be easier if you would leave him. She said: Greta I can’t leave him, I heard you are really good at this stuff(this was 2.5 years ago before I officially started my dating coach business) I will do anything you tell me to do I love him so much I can’t let him go. And I said ok, I can’t make you leave him so let’s try!

I was on her case every day, guiding her every step and telling her what she is doing wrong that he has lost interest in her. She was arguing with me but still listening and doing as I told her too. 1 week later of my guidance he sent her a picture message. She said to me: Greta that is so weird last time I had a picture message from him was 6 months ago. I said it’s a sign it’s working .. just keep listening to me.. 2 weeks later he sent her a message saying: ‘Do you still love me?’
I said it to her: You see!! it’s working! Perfect!


Free months later she had the best relationship of her life, he started to value, respect her, appreciate and adore her. Six months later he proposed to her. When she showed me the ring It inspired me to start this business. My point is if you know what you have done wrong in the relationship, so he lost the interest and attraction for you. And if you are willing to work hard on yourself to change those things within yourself .. Then if the guy still has an attraction or love left for you, you can make any relationship blossom! It doesn’t matter it is your ex or someone new.

Ps: People will treat you how you let them treat you, if you will behave as a doormat he will treat you as one. And if you behave as High Value he will treat you as one. Therefore how he treats you depends completely on you. Until I stepped in this girl was behaving as a doormat in her relationship and her man was taking her completely for granted. When I coached her to be High Value he started to treat her like a Queen!

Ladies the power of the relationship is in your hands be smart, do whats best for you and bring out the best in your man. So he starts to value, cherish, respect, love and adore you!

For more information get in touch x

The post From A Doormat To A Queen appeared first on Dating and Relationship Coach for Women.

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What is the most attractive characteristic for men in women? What attracts men most? What gets men interested? And finally, what can I do to get his respect?

Well, ladies, all their questions have one thing in common, they all depend on you and the way you act toward your man.

Let me explain:

During the first steps of the relationship when the girl is still getting to know the guy, she talks to him about her ambitions, her goals. She tells him her opinion on different topics, just like she would do with anyone else.

After a while, the girl really starts liking the guy and she basically stops being herself. She starts treating him as if he is the most important person in her life and does not speak her mind as much as she used to. She starts agreeing with him more than usual and is pretty much is not being herself. Since she likes the guy so much she ends up being scared that he might leave her. She tries to be perfect for him and basically agrees with him on everything he is saying. She thinks that this might bring them together, sadly this is doing the complete opposite.

The fact is girls, guys will like you more for speaking your mind even if they don’t agree with you. They will respect you more if you aren’t afraid to say what you think or to tell him your opinion. And through this, you will grow more in your relationship.

Just imagine that the person you were dating would always agree with you, order the same food as you, never have a different opinion. Don’t you think that would just be boring, well you are right it would!

Now that we have mentioned Dating and food, let’s take a look at this scenario.

Let’s say you have been dating a guy for a while now. You really like him and have a date at a restaurant. He picks up the menu and decides on what he wants to eat. When you are asked what you would like to eat you simply reply with „I’ll take whatever you are taking“.

This is one of the simplest scenarios yet extremely important. By making simple decisions like picking out what you would like to eat, or by picking out a movie that you would like to watch at the cinema, you show the guy that you have your own opinion and know what you want.

You are basically being yourself, and are not making any adjustments simply because you like the guy.

This ladies has to be done from the start of the relationship and never changed! From going to a restaurant to going on vacation, just be yourself and voice your opinion, your man will love you for that.

For more detailed information on Dating and Relationship Advice for women please check out my YouTube channel. I will be posting on my Blog every week for Dating and Relationship Advice for women. Keep your eyes open for it! Also, the first Advice/Consultation with me is completely free, so don’t be shy (I will only give you the advice that is good for you) and email your question to Greta@ladiesrelationshipcoach.com or WhatsApp me +447702196055 Skype: Greta Bereisaite

xoxo
Greta

The post What Attracts Men Most in Women? appeared first on Dating and Relationship Coach for Women.

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How do positive life quotes influence Women to act as “doormats” towards men?

The outside world has quite a big impact on our behaviour. It even influences us to either act as “doormats“ or as high-value women towards men.

A while ago a friend of mine showed me a quote on social media which some of you might have already seen.
This quote stayed in my head for quite some time and really did drive me nuts!

The problem with it was that it was displayed in a very simple and in a „live in the moment“ type of way, which is quite an attractive way of thinking but almost downright wrong in the dating scene.

Now let’s imagine, your boyfriend has been mean or unkind to you in one way or the other and on top of that instead of saying sorry he has disappeared on you for a few days. He is giving you the „silent treatment“ hoping that you will come running after him even though he was the one who has done you wrong. You, on the other hand, are finding it really hard without hearing from him and feeling quite insecure about the whole situation.

You then go to social media and read the „amazing“ „Why complicate life“ Quote

and think to yourself – why don’t I just text him? Life is to short!
Therefore, you decide to text him to meet up or tell him that you miss him even though he has been mean to you and is giving you the cold shoulder…

Now the outcome of that is you are labelling yourself as a doormat and not as a high valued woman.(influenced by a positive life quote)

So ladies think before you speak and think twice before you act. Be careful and don’t let the media influence your love life the wrong way!

For more detailed information on Dating and Relationship Advice for women please check out my YouTube channel. I will be posting on my Blog every week for Dating and Relationship Advice for women. Keep your eyes open for it! Also, the first Advice/Consultation with me is completely free, so don’t be shy (I will only give you the advice that is good for you) and email your question to Greta@ladiesrelationshipcoach.com or WhatsApp me +447702196055 Skype: Greta Bereisaite

xoxo
Greta

The post How Does Media Influence Women To Act As Doormats appeared first on Dating and Relationship Coach for Women.

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The chase is undoubtedly one of the best parts of a relationship.  Unfortunately, in many cases when you and your man begin to settle down into a more serious relationship that feeling of being chased can begin to fade or in some cases disappear altogether.  That’s no fun for anyone and I’m here to help stop this from happening.So many women come to me asking how they get their boyfriend to chase them and in most cases, I have to tell them the same thing, let him.  It may seem odd at first but letting your man run free and trusting him to do the things he wants to do is the first step in getting him to regain his lust. 

At the early stages of the relationship, men will be much more inclined to let you know everything about their lives.  Questions about where he’s going or who he’s with are common and won’t be met with any resistance.  Once things start developing and those conversations become a regular occurrence it’s only natural that he’ll start to pull away and want to keep some things private.  This is a crucial point that can make or break in a happy relationship.

Once you start feeling that resistance, it’s time to let him spread his wings and have his privacy. 

 I’m not saying to deliberately ignore your boyfriend or treat him differently in any way, just give him the freedom that you know he wants.  Enjoy your time apart and you’ll be able to enjoy your time together so much more. When the questions stop coming and he feels comfortable he’ll be the one questioning you and you can enjoy that feeling of being chased again.  It should never be the job of one person in the relationship to pull and the other to push.

Being in a relationship is all about having fun and enjoying yourself whilst trusting your partner and enabling them to enjoy their lives even more with you by their side.

So take a break from being the hunter and enjoy being the hunted.

For more detailed information on Dating and Relationship Advice for women please check out my YouTube channel. I will be posting on my Blog every week for Dating and Relationship Advice for women. Keep your eyes open for it! Also, the first Advice/Consultation with me is completely free, so don’t be shy (I will only give you the advice that is good for you) and email your question to Greta@ladiesrelationshipcoach.com or WhatsApp me +447702196055

The post How To Get Your Boyfriend To Chase You appeared first on Dating and Relationship Coach for Women.

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The Answer – Why Men Pull Away
So many women ask me “why do men pull away?” and want to know “how to get guys to like you?”. In so many scenarios I end up telling them that he very well may have already liked you and although he was pulling away, it didn’t need to be the end.

So, don’t panic and pour yourself another glass of wine. I’m here to give you some potential reasons as to why he might be pulling away and why you shouldn’t be freaking out about it.

Here are my three reasons why men pull away: 
Stress 
More often than not it (actually) isn’t your fault. Men can be under immense amounts of stress and although insane to us, they’ll keep that stress to themselves. In these cases, they may pull away from you but don’t worry, it isn’t because they don’t like you and is more so because they don’t like their current situation.
Too much time together 
The old saying “absence makes the heart grow fonder” is a saying for a reason. Sometimes men need time away from you to realise just how much they like you. If you’ve spent a lot of time together and suddenly it feels like he’s trying to pull away, let him. After they’ve done his own thing for a while they more often than not come back and are even more invested in the relationship.
Playing games 
In the early stages of a relationship, it’s hard to know how your partner will react to certain scenarios.

Men like to put women to the test and see what they’ll do if they stop answering calls, replying to texts and cancelling on dates. In this scenario, the best thing to do is play along and keep your cool. If you play your cards right you very well may end up with the upper hand. At the end of the day, you shouldn’t be worrying about why men pull away and just need to be happy with your situation and who you are as a person. Let men do their thing if need be to play their games and most importantly, don’t stress!

I will be posting on my Blog every week for Dating and Relationship Advice for women. Keep your eyes open for it!Also, the first Advice/Consultation with me is completely free, so don’t be shy (I will only give you the advice that is good for you) and email your question to Greta@ladiesrelationshipcoach.com or WhatsApp me +447702196055

The post Why Men Pull Away appeared first on Dating and Relationship Coach for Women.

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What Do You Do When Your Man Is Unkind Or Rude To You?

Ladies – in this post I will give you a few tips on how to get a man to respect you 

Men want a woman who respects and values herself(a Woman of High Value) and not a girl who he can walk all over(Doormat). When a woman shows she can control her emotions, it shows a man that she does not have time to deal with being disrespected by him.

So, when you are in a situation where he has said something that upset you, it is best to acknowledge it and let it go. Examples of what you could say to acknowledge the situation would be: “I did not appreciate that”, “Excuse me?” or “That crossed a line”.

Keep what you say short and change the subject after you said it.  When you make it apparent that you don’t tolerate being disrespected yet you don’t nag about it(as you kept it short and direct) he will gain more respect for you and start thinking of ways not to lose you.

In a situation that is more serious, it is best to come up with an excuse and leave. Even though you didn’t say anything out loud to him, you showed him with your actions. That if he won’t respect you, you won’t stick around. Men respond to actions better than words.

Therefore if he wants to spend time with you he better be kind.

The key in here is do not go crazy by crying being upset or nagging. Make sure to control your emotions, and show him with your actions how to respect you by simply leaving the situation. Because you are a Woman Of High Value and have better things to do than spend time with someone who is disrespecting you.

Please watch my video for more detailed explanation x

How to Get A Man To Respect You? Why Is He Being Mean To Me? - YouTube

I will be posting on my Blog every week for Dating and Relationship Advice for women. Keep your eyes open for it!Also, the first Advice/Consultation with me is completely free, so don’t be shy (I will only give you the advice that is good for you) and email your question to Greta@ladiesrelationshipcoach.com or WhatsApp me +447702196055

The post What To Do When Your Man Is Mean To You? appeared first on Dating and Relationship Coach for Women.

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