don’t always feel the need to be “positive” and “happy” while in recovery. although those things are wonderful to be, it’s not always possible for those recovering. remember you’re allowed to admit you’re not okay because maybe by admitting this, it allows for the moment where you realise: if i’m not okay, i can also be okay (at least one day).
and that’s what you need to fight for. that one day.
That’s really weird that you’d get weighed by your psychiatrist. For a doctor or dietitian, regular weights are totally normal, but your psychiatrist has no reason to weigh you. If they absolutely must know your weight for their charts or whatever, you can sign a form for your doctor to communicate with them, and the doctor can regularly update them. I’d highly suggest talking to your psychiatrist about this and explaining your thoughts on the matter.
However, in the recovery process, it’s important to understand that your weight isn’t going to be private. Your dietitian and doctor do need to know it, but it shouldn’t be an elephant in the room. Your weight should absolutely not be your concern in recovery in any way, regardless of what the eating disorder tells you.
I personally do not believe that self recovery is possible. If you really want to keep this from your parents, there are many organizations that provide free and private mental health care. However, unless parents are abusive, or the home environment is compromised in any way, I always encourage people reaching out to those close to them for help. Most support systems don’t consider their loved ones to be burdens–they’re usually glad to be of help, and will do anything they can to make sure you get the help you need.
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