Long time no post. I can’t actually remember what I last posted ? Oh well.
I’m Wednesday I did something terrifying. I went to Maidenhead alone to go to the EDU for an appointment. I have big anxiety about travelling alone so this was huge. I planned it meticulously so nothing could go wrong. Until I missed the train, had to get a taxi to the hospital, almost missed the bus back to the station, missed the stop, had to walk alone Maidenhead main roads getting cat called. Andddd my phone died. So yeah, was hard but I did it!
The appointment was brief. I’m being discharged from the Berkshire ED Service for summer and I have an assessment with the Kent ED Service on the 11th June😬
Then I went out with Sam for dinner to YO!Sushi and it was amazing!! We planned it for a week so I was fully prepared and it was lovely. I had the mushroom ramen 🍜 also Sam bought me the elephant teddy I’ve wanted and I’m so in love- with Sam and the elephant. Today was my last IR exam, so I only have one exam left!!
Alsooo… tomorrow is my birthday! Sam and I are going to London and to Camden market. We’re eating out twice and I’m really scared but also so excited to go out and explore 🥳 does anyone know anything to do in Camden and/or Covent Garden?
I saw my home treatment nurse this morning to discuss they next steps. I have a few options:
Stay in Reading and attend day patient over summer with my team
Get transferred back to Kent for summer and see if they can arrange day patient (although there isn’t a solid ED service there yet so it’s unclear if there’s an NHS day patient unit)
Get transferred to Kent, attend outpatient over summer, then start uni again tomorrow in October whilst attending the Maidenhead day patient.
I’ve chosen the latter. I really do not want to spend my summer here. The transfer was put in today so hopefully I’ll hear back from the Kent services before I go home in June. If it goes to plan it will slightly suck because I’ll have to balance hospital and uni but I’m utterly determined to do well next year as it actually counts towards my degree.
I imagine I’ll have an initial assessment with the Kent service (if the transfer is excepted) and they’ll give me more of an idea of what’s going on. I’m still slightly in the dark, nothing is certain yet but I know what I want to happen for the first time in a while. I’m seeing HTT and the dietician at the EDU on the 22nd May, but if there’s any progression before then they’ll be in touch.
Also, has anyone experienced achy legs as a symptom? For a few weeks now I lie in bed and my legs really lightly cramp, it doesn’t hurt at all but it’s uncomfortable. You know when you sit with you legs tucked up for too long and they ache when you move them into another position? It kinda feels like that but when I’m stretched out. (Note: I don’t exercise at all apart from walking around but nothing strenuous at all)
Focus on what you can do now. It’s no use worrying about what could be, what might have been, or what is going to happen in a year or two. Who you are right now is what you have immediate control over.
this may be an unpopular opinion but self-diagnosing is probably the easiest way to figure out if you have a mental illness and we shouldn’t be discouraging people from getting the help that they need on the off chance that they might be wrong. which, even if they are wrong, literally everyone can benefit from going to therapy so it hurts no one. there is a difference between casually flinging diagnoses around (”ugh I’m so OCD,” “i burned my toast now I’m depressed,” etc.) and genuinely discovering that hmm, maybe this isn’t normal. ya’ll are all for increasing mental health awareness using the internet but then come after people who realize they’re ill because of the internet. I have had so many people message me from my social anxiety post thanking me for making them feel less broken and alone or for finally giving them a word for what they felt. self-diagnosing is not the enemy; the casual misuse of diagnostic terms is.