Fit To Be Pregnant's mission is to provide the most up-to-date scientific information on prenatal and postpartum exercise and nutrition, to encourage pregnant and breastfeeding mothers to maintain their fitness and health for themselves as well as their babies, and to encourage a healthy state of mind by operating from a place of self-love and self-care.
I hope you had a wonderful Mother’s Day! Mine was absolute perfection. My kids each brought me a gift – and all of them were desserts, LOL.
In the past, depending on what extreme I was in with my eating, this would have caused me to do one of three things:
Eat all of the food, all at once, all while feeling guilty AND out of control
Throw it all in the trash, spraying a cleaning product on it to keep me from going in after it
Save it all for a “cheat” day, then eating it all in one sitting and feeling sick
None of these scenarios felt good, but my relationship with food was so intense at the time that I didn’t know of any other option. Food felt like an addiction that I had to either give in to or white knuckle through.
But now, this food all still sits in my kitchen two days later. Some has been shared with my four kids, some has been nibbled on by me. Things have changed big time for me, through intention and through a lot of trust and growth.
So what did I do to be able to get to this point, and how are my clients doing the same? Through a process I created called the NES system, I was able to do the following:
1. Intentionally Managing Food
I used to walk around in a state of semi-starvation. I was either eating foods that did not stabilize my blood sugar (processed foods with very little protein) and didn’t keep me full for long, or I was eating too little food for the amount of activity I was doing – what I thought I had to do to lose weight.
I wandered through the day with no plan. I’d grab whatever I could find, sometimes settling for the crusts of my kids’ peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. This came from being in survival mode rather than intentionally caring for myself the same way I did for my kids.
Now I spend a little time each week planning out what I’m going to be eating daily. And I have backup plans for those days when I need to grab food out. Everything I choose is foods I’ve experimented with and know will satiate me, keeping me full and my blood sugar balanced for 4-5 hours. I get ahead of hunger by eating intentionally – both time and WHAT I eat.
A lot of the moms I speak to are weary of planning out their food because they think it takes too much time. I remind them that a) it doesn’t need to be complicated and b) you’re going to either devote a little time up front to planning and preparing to eat, or you’re going to spend a bunch of time and energy trying to figure out what to eat and then feeling low-energy if it didn’t meet your needs. Either way, the time/energy is spent.
2. Having an abundance mindset with food
Our primal brains go into famine protection mode when they believe food is scarce. Once we’re in famine defense mode, we obsess over finding food, and once we find it, we gorge on it in case it isn’t available again.
When we diet or restrict food (cut carbs, cut sugar, etc) we unintentionally activate this primal survival mechanism. Once in scarcity mindset, we can’t think clearly about food. So if something our brains consider “scarce” is presented to us, we feel an extreme intensity around it. This is exactly why you may feel out of control when you have sweets in your house. Even if you’re indulging in them regularly, you can still be in this mindset if there is guilt or shame surrounding your eating.
I trained myself and I train my clients to be in an abundance mindset around food. When you have an abundance of something, mentally, you don’t obsess over it. You know you can have more whenever you want it. Once that intensity is alleviated, it’s easier to make decisions about food. This doesn’t mean I stop liking Reese’s (NEVER), it just means I am now able to take a bite when I crave it and save the rest for later. It’s not going away.
3. Managing stress and emotions without food
Being a human, especially an adult human, comes with stresses and emotions even in the best of situations. Throughout life, we learn to cope with these feelings in many ways. A select few of us may have learned healthy coping skills, however, many of us did not and learned to numb out with food, alcohol, drugs, etc instead.
If you’ve learned to cope or numb out with food, you’re not alone. I did for years, and many of my clients did too. This doesn’t mean you’re now wired this way forever. You can re-learn how to cope with stress and emotions with some time, training, and patience.
Stop and recognize when you’re doing this to create an awareness, then have a list ready of alternatives (going for a walk, taking deep breaths, etc) and promise yourself you’ll try this first, and if it doesn’t work, you can eat (permission is important or in the heat of the moment, you won’t try it).
Emotions might be uncomfortable for you if you’re used to numbing them, but with some patience, you’ll learn that they come and go like clouds.
That’s what you’re going to see tomorrow morning at this time.
The Strength In Mothers Mentorship will be closed for new sign-ups and you will have missed out on the community, the support, the calls, the coaching, the breakthroughs, the epiphanies and freedom that the ladies in the group will be experiencing together.
The mentorship will be banding together, diving deep into the mindset that is going to set them FREE.
They will be free from dieting so they can enjoy eating again.
They will be free from damaging mindsets that keep them from adhering to healthy eating and exercise.
They will be free from the emotional drain of the scale and calorie counting.
They will be free from waiting until their body is perfect to be happy.
They will be free from emotional, stress, and compulsive eating.
They will be free of negativity and meanness in their heads.
They will be free of food rules and guilt and shame over food.
Will you be one of them? Or will you wake up tomorrow morning with regret, wishing you had just bitten the bullet and given it a try?
It’s time to ask yourself, will I keep taking shots in the dark, trying to do this on my own and ending up right back where I started? Will I keep trying diet gimmicks, just to feel frustrated and stuck?
OR…Am I ready to stop getting on and off the bandwagon once and for all? Am I ready to commit to feeling better and making myself a priority so I can be a more present, energetic mom? Am I ready for a coach who knows exactly how to get me there? Am I ready to make an investment in myself so I can have the best experience of motherhood?
Tomorrow, you will be on your way to your ideal post-baby body with a positive healthy mindset to match, or you’ll be in the exact same place you are today.
The choice is completely yours, but you’ve got to decide now.
I am beside myself with excitement to start this mentorship with the incredible women who believed in themselves and jumped all in, and they are ready to go. So it’s time.
Access to the Strength in Mothers portal with lessons and exercises to accelerate your new mindset with three modules – Heal Your Relationship with Food, Heal Your Relationship with Your Body, and Food and Body Freedom. These are the SAME mindset lessons that I work through with my 1:1 clients! ($3000 value)
Weekly group calls with in-depth lessons taught live by Deanna (recorded in case you can’t make it), a live coaching session, and time for discussion and Q&A. You’ll also have access to guest speakers who are experts in their fields, or are sharing their experience ($2000 value)
Connect with women just like you in a supportive environment, share and receive insights you might not have on your own – this is the biggest value!! (priceless)
A closed Facebook group to discuss lessons and connect with one another in between calls ($497 value)
A FREE TICKET to my LIVE weekend workshop event in Austin, TX in September 2019 (optional but highly recommended!) ($500 value)
What you can expect after 6 months:
You will build meaningful, deep relationships with other moms who have the same goals, struggles, and lifestyle as you. We’re going to be best friends!
You will learn my NES system for sustainable, healthy and balanced eating so you can ditch all diets, food rules, and learn to combat the food police in your head
You will feel FREE to walk into a restaurant and order anything you want without guilt.
You will learn how to make peace with your body and improve your relationship with it.
You will learn how to re-set your willpower each day so that it never runs out.
You will learn how to move away from body obsession and re-focus your thoughts in a healthy way.
You will learn how to create a lifetime of workout motivation (even when you’re exhausted).
You will learn how to stop relying on scales, calorie counting, and other tools to measure your progress and your worth.
You will learn how to conquer emotional eating.
You will learn how to understand the signals you are missing from your body and how to use them to transform your body.
You’ll learn how to fall in love with what you’re eating and how you’re moving.
You will learn how to banish negative self-talk that is holding you back from your goals.
You will learn how to include “forbidden” foods into your life without them affecting your transformation goals negatively.
This mentorship is not going to open again for at least 6 months, and I don’t know if the investment will be this low ever again.
And your opportunity is slipping away – you have until midnight to decide.
I am so freaking excited about the group of women that is coming together for the Strength In Mothers Mentorship! And your responses, enthusiasm, and questions about this program have been overwhelming. Thank you!!
As a reminder, enrollment into Strength in Mothers Mentorship closes tomorrow (May 1st) at 11:59PM CST, so if you’ve been waiting to join, now is the time.
I’ve been having tons of conversations with women like you, and while many of you are desperate to join and believe in your heart this would be one of the best things you’ve ever done, you’re struggling with a few limiting beliefs. I wanted to address a few of those for you (and if I missed yours, hit reply and let’s chat!).
I can’t afford it or can’t spend that kind of money on myself
Listen, I get it. This may be a steep investment for you at a time in your life when money feels tight. As moms, we feel guilty about pretty much everything, but especially when it comes to investing in ourselves. We put our family’s needs and expenses first while we wear clothes from 10 years ago and eat the crust of our kids’ sandwiches for lunch.
But, this is the exact mindset that keeps you stuck, exhausted, and honestly, maybe a little resentful. Right?
Ask any of the women who have already signed up and they will tell you that just the act of investing in themselves changed their perspective almost immediately, like this text I got from one of the new members:
We haven’t even started yet, but her mental commitment to freedom is already changing her life.
As far as feeling selfish, sure our kids don’t want us to take an hour away from them, and maybe our partners get grumpy about us spending money. But you know what they DO love? A mom/partner/colleague who is happier, has more physical and mental energy to devote to them, is more secure, and feels GOOD in their presence.
In fact, one of the number one things I hear from the women I work with is how their relationships with their partners improved immediately when they shifted their mindset. No more separate dinners, no more stressing at restaurants, no more mental energy taken up completely by how you look or food.
I scraped together $15,000 to invest in my own mentorship last year and it was so life-changing that I’ve signed up for another year. My four children (ages 5-20) are old enough to say “Mom, you’re so much happier and healthier now than when we were little!” An investment in me is an investment in them, and through this new mindset, I get that now.
I’m introverted and nervous about sharing
You may not believe this if you’ve seen me on social media with my own mentorship gatherings, but I’m a huge introvert. I actually cried when I hit the sign up button for that group last year, because I was so terrified. I was afraid I wouldn’t feel like sharing, afraid I wouldn’t fit in, and afraid I’d be the same wallflower that I was in school.
But a) the money invested lit a fire under me to give it my all and b) the women were all so similar to me and feeling the exact same way, so it was actually really easy to bond. Sure the first couple of calls were awkward, but in no time we all had each other’s numbers and they had me doing things like Soul Cycle and climbing the Santa Monica stairs (click here to see my highlight reel from my mastermind).
I’ve come to recognize that “out of my comfort zone” feeling as being a signal that something incredible and magical is about to happen. And now I’m pushing to find it all the time (like starting this mentorship!).
My life is so insane right now – I’ll wait until next time
Yep, life is insane. You’re a mom! And guess what, something new is always going to come up. There is always going to be chaos, a new situation or obstacle to overcome.
The timing will NEVER be perfect.
Waiting for perfect circumstances is part of the mindset we’re trying to drop in the Strength in Mothers curriculum. This is part of perfectionist or black and white thinking, which keeps us stuck and inconsistent. Instead, you’ll be learning how to navigate your healthy lifestyle and self-care through any and all circumstances. Imperfect baby steps forward are so much better than perfectly crafted steps that are never taken.
And, if I do another round of the mentorship, it won’t be until late fall. This is your last chance to join for at least six months, and possibly at this investment level.
I never finish any programs
That’s because 99.9% of the fitness and diet stuff out there doesn’t address the reason you can’t stick with it – your mindset! Your mindset is the reason you’re working against your own body, against your own brain, and why you’re either stuck unable to stick with anything.
Which is exactly why this is the main thing we’ll be working on in the mentorship. There are meal plans and workouts available for free all over the internet. You probably have a graveyard of programs that you’ve spent money on and they haven’t worked (long-term, at least). This is why. They didn’t teach you how to think about food and exercise, and in reality, they probably made your mindset WORSE!
And, in this program you will be part of a tight-knit, intimate group that will make you feel accountable if you don’t show up. We’ve got you and your best interest at heart!
I’m not sure if you/the mentorship will help me
I can promise you that if you show up with an open mind, read the lessons, participate in the calls and really try to implement what you’re learning, THIS. WILL. CHANGE. YOUR. LIFE.
Now, if you’re the kind of person who isn’t open to growth and super-stuck on the concept of temporary weight loss, this is not for you.
This program is for those who are ready to stop putting band-aids on symptoms and get to the heart of the issue so they can stop starting over, hopping on and off bandwagons, and start living their best life mentally and physically.
“What can I eat? I can’t eat that.”
“How much should I be eating?”
“This will make me fat.”
“That fitness guy on tv said these were bad.”
“How am I going to not eat cake at the party?”
“I look so gross.”
“Why can’t I just lose weight?”
“I’ll just stop eating snacks.”
“I’ll try that low-carb diet that my sister-in-law is doing.”
“Is breastfeeding making me fat?”
“Why can’t I just wake up early and run?”
Non-stop, all day long, these were my thoughts.
Obsessions over food, how I looked, what others thought of me, how to control my body after having my babies.
I didn’t know it yet, but I was thinking about everything the wrong way.
And now it’s my mission in life to teach women who are struggling through what might amount to the toughest years of motherhood how to change their perspective.
Take one of my former clients and Strength in Mothers graduates, Jaylena.
When she first contacted me, Jaylena was hoping to lose the weight of her second pregnancy. After reading through my content, she was starting to understand that her own thought patterns and unhealthy relationship with food were keeping her stuck.
She was bouncing between restriction and overeating, and beating herself up for it and for the state of her post-baby body almost all the time.
Jaylena was skeptical that my methods – which seemed really pleasant and somewhat easy compared to diets she had been on- would help her, and she was extremely nervous to invest so much money into herself as a stay-at-home mom.
But Jaylena had daughters, and she was sure of one thing – she could not have them growing up and repeating the unhealthy patterns and negative self-talk that she had been living with for years. The thought of them speaking to themselves and struggling with food the way she did was devastating to her.
Over the next six months, I taught Jaylena how to take the emotional intensity away from food and get in touch with her body’s signals so she knew exactly how to fuel it. She was shocked at how out of touch she had been with her body; what she had formerly believed was low-willpower was actually just an energy management issue.
This time with me, rather than yo-yo between being on and off the bandwagon, constantly dealing with food guilt and shame, and beating herself up for not exercising, she learned new skills and a new mindset. This effortlessly created the healthy habits she needed to reach her naturally healthiest body weight.
This took some patience, some de-programming of diet mindsets, and some time, but at the end of six months she was THRILLED with her progress.
She was no longer binge-eating or compulsively eating. Her core diet was healthy whole foods but she was also enjoying the “fun” foods she loved. She was exercising regularly and with joy. She was confident in herself and own ability to handle any situation with food.
Best of all, she was doing it all from a place of self-kindness rather than a place of self-loathing, for the first time in her adult life.
I care about you and your experience of motherhood. I’ve been exactly where you are at, I’ve felt the struggles and the obstacles, and I know exactly how to help you, as I have helped hundreds of clients before.
You are not alone. Other new moms are out there struggling with these same issues, and we need each other’s support. We were meant to do this as a village, not in isolation.
Investing in yourself is SCARY AS HELL but it is transformative. Imagine looking back 6 months from now and realizing it was the best investment of your life? What if you came through the other side happier, healthier, with new skills to last a lifetime, and with new friendships and a support network you could always turn to? Wouldn’t that be worth it?
Enrollment into the mentorship is closing soon, and I know that if you don’t jump on this, you’re going to miss out on something amazing. I don’t want you to stay stuck with patterns that hold you back from reaching your goals. I want you to be free like me and the women I have worked with.
Wow, I’m still on a high from the round table last night for our “test drive” of the Strength in Mothers Mentorship. My biggest take-away as the facilitator was this:
This mentorship is desperately needed in our community of moms.
The incredibly brave group of women who were able to make the call last night got out of their comfort zones and took action, showing up and investing time in connection and in themselves.
And man, did it pay off…
The relief at hearing their own stories reflected back in so many other women was palpable.
Some were feeling totally out of control with their bodies and food, and some were feeling way too controlling. Some had experienced being both too self-controlling and too self-neglectful, including myself.
And although our struggles and bodies and lives may look totally different on the outside, the biggest discovery they had was that the underlying theme was exactly the same:
They had too many self-worth eggs in the body basket
They weren’t in a state of self-care (not necessarily the actions, but the mindset!)
Whether they’re in control or out of control, they’re thinking about food and their bodies constantly
They are mentally exhausted and missing out on enjoying their babies and kids as much as they could be
They are feeling isolated and alone because no one is talking about these things.
The thing I love about my own mentorship and that I saw happening in the call last night was when you’re in a large group connecting with others who are going what you’re going through, the mind-sharing is magical. You can open up and say exactly what you’re struggling with, and instantly have feedback and ideas that you never would have thought of on your own.
Because of this, you’re internalizing new ideas and beliefs at an accelerated pace that would take you years otherwise.
I could see the epiphanies happening on the faces in the call, and it made me want to weep.
THIS is what I envisioned when I created the Strength in Mothers Mentorship. I want moms like you to understand that your happiness, your freedom, your joy, your experience of motherhood, your mental and physical health are worth investing in.
As I told the ladies last evening, you probably have a graveyard of diets, fitness programs, supplements, books, coaches and trainers that have failed you. And you need to understand that if it worked but only temporarily, it didn’t work. Aren’t you sick of trying, making some progress, and losing it and starting over?
I can tell you with absolute confidence after working with hundreds of women and experiencing the change personally – what’s missing is your mindset and the safe, loving support of others who want to heal right alongside you. I’ve watched the process unfold so many times in my coaching programs that I know it like the back of my hand.
Get your mind right, the body will follow.
And I get it!! This is totally different, it’s a big investment of time and finances, and you don’t know if it will “work”. Your trust with your body is probably broken, your trust with yourself may be as well. I’ve been there. I think we all have.
But somewhere deep down, if there is even a tiny voice saying “I deserve better than this”, you owe it to yourself to take that leap. Imagine looking back and realizing that because you took that action, you:
are thinking less and less about your body and food
are effortlessly practicing self-care like healthy food and exercise that used to feel so forced or that you avoided completely
are able to focus more on your babies and are better able to enjoy this one chance you get at motherhood
can walk into a restaurant without feeling stressed over what to eat or leave feeling stuffed and disappointed
have the blueprint to reach your naturally healthiest body and weight without restriction, misery, or deprivation
I know it can feel selfish to take time and money for yourself as a mom, especially when both are already tight. But this is an investment with a return that will last you for the rest of your life. You don’t get this time back.
As I tearfully told the ladies on the call, I wasted my chance with my first three babies, who are now teenagers. I was exhausted, constantly dieting, giving everything to them and nothing to myself. Because of this I was short-tempered, not in any photos with them, and went through my days feeling like I was drowning rather than being present. I thought that giving all of my resources to them was what I was supposed to do: put them first.
I got to have one more chance with my youngest, who is now 5, and the difference was glaringly obvious right away. This time I prioritized my needs so I could best take care of him. I felt present and happy, I was healthy and felt fueled and energized, and all of my mental energy that used to be devoted to dieting was freed up to focus on him.
And my teenagers tell me all the time – “Gosh mom, you were so miserable when we were little, I like you much better now!”
So what I thought was selfish – self-care – was actually the least selfish thing I could do. It wasn’t just an investment in me, it was in investment in my entire family.
There is still time to apply for the Strength in Mothers Mentorship, but I’ll be closing enrollment soon so that I can get to work with the ladies who were ready to take action and made that decision to invest in themselves.
AND because I’m so confident that this will change your life, as a bonus for signing up for the next 24 hours ONLY, I will be including a 6 month membership into my #FastFitMoms club with the mentorship ($250 value)! You MUST apply, be accepted and sign up by Saturday evening at midnight in order to claim this bonus, so don’t wait!
When I first began coaching postpartum women who were trying to lose the extra weight of pregnancy, I thought all I had to do was hand over a macro count or a meal plan, they’d follow it, and we’d make adjustments based on how their body reacted.
I mean sometimes, it WAS that simple. Every so often a unicorn would come along who had zero adherence issues, a healthy relationship with food, would follow the program, and then thank me as she checked off her goal weight and rode off into the sunset, satisfied.
But for the other 99.9% of these women, it turned out to be SO MUCH more complicated.
About half of them just couldn’t make themselves eat what was assigned to them, even when it was tailored to their specific tastes. The other half followed the program rigidly but often, usually late at night or on the weekends, found themselves at the bottom of an entire box of cookies or pint of ice cream, wondering what the hell had happened.
Most also struggled with weigh-ins. When the scale wasn’t moving in the right direction, they wanted to give up the healthy food and exercise that was so good for them, just because it wasn’t “working”. They would have emotional melt-downs and beat themselves up. When it was moving in the right direction, they started to feel “safe” and would suddenly relax and give up the healthy food and exercise that was so good for them♀️.
Almost all of them felt so guilty about eating anything off-plan or that they considered “junk food”, you’d think they’d committed a crime.
And the body image…no matter where we were in the process…oh my God it was heartbreaking. Reading what women thought of themselves and their post-baby bodies was something my empathic soul could hardly bear week after week.
Underscoring all of this for these clients was the total and complete overwhelm, sleep deprivation, and exhaustion of being a new mom.
I started to realize pretty much right away that meal plans and macro calculations were just not going to be enough.
I had to figure out a way to help my clients get into the right mindset, the same one I had cultivated for myself after doing it the miserable way for years and years.
And I felt the crushing responsibility of helping these women love themselves weighing heavier and heavier on me each day. I couldn’t just ignore the pain that was rampant in this community.
So I decided to write little weekly lessons for them to read, and these were assigned to them with a small amount of homework each week. As I got better and better at recognizing the pitfalls of dieting and substituting weight loss for self-worth, I developed more and more effective tools and strategies for them and added it to the lessons.
Eventually, this curriculum became my Strength In Mothers program, and it has now helped hundreds and hundreds of women ditch the diets, heal their food and body obsession, and implement a healthy lifestyle without misery.
Besides my kids, it’s the best thing I’ve ever created.
This curriculum has had many incarnations and overhauls as I’ve perfected the process that I use with my clients, and has developed into specific systems: The NES system for sustainable healthy eating, The Progress Pyramid for staying focused on what motivates long-term, Sliding Scale Goals, to name a few.
My clients and the women who have purchased the program on its own have LOVED IT:
This curriculum is the basis for the Strength In Mothers Mentorship, which is currently open for enrollment.
ICYMI, I’ll be walking you and a supportive community of women through this curriculum together in a small, intimate setting. I’ll teach you the same process I teach my 1:1 clients, but you’ll also be able to hear unique insights from other moms who are in the same boat as you. Here is what you will learn in this mentorship:
Phase 1 – Heal Your Relationship with Food
Diet Mindset vs. Wellness Mindset
The Restrict/Binge Cycle
Abundance Mindset vs. Scarcity Mindset
Our Primal Brain and Why It Matters
The NES System for Sustainable Healthy Eating
Handling Overeating, Compulsive Eating, and “Mess Ups”
Dealing with The Food Police
Phase 2 – Heal Your Relationship with Your Body
Examining Expectations of Your Body
Negative Self-Talk – the Mean Girl In Your Head
Judgment and It’s Surprising Effect
Finding Your Self-Worth Beyond What You Look Like
Comparison Is The Thief Of Joy
What To Do When You’re Triggered By Dressing Room/Photos of Yourself
External Validation vs. Internal Validation
The Importance of Gratitude
Phase 3 – Food and Body Freedom
The Progress Pyramid
Self-Care vs. Self-Control
Process Focus vs. Results Focus
External Validation Tools (Calories, Macros, etc)
Spectrum Thinking and Sliding Scale Goals
Exercising for Flow
Body Autonomy – Doing it for YOU
Putting It All Together
If you’ve been feeling disconnected from your body, isolated from others, and like maybe something was “wrong” with you, you belong in this mentorship.
How much time and money have you wasted on fitness programs and supplements and shakes and meal plans that haven’t addressed your mindset? How much longer will you suffer in isolation, hoping that something just clicks?
NO OTHER PROGRAMS address these psychological needs of new moms, and no one else is offering this supportive community environment. This is a no-brainer!
And if you want to come and take a “test drive”, don’t forget to join our round table discussion tomorrow (Thursday) evening at 8PM EST / 5 PM PST.To RSVP, sign up here.
PS-I’ll be answering all your questions about the mentorship and anything else that’s on your mind at the roundtable, so don’t miss out!
Last week I had the most fun teaching a group of moms about food and body obsession, how it can blow up after pregnancy, and some of my strategies to deal with it. We learned how relying on the scale can actually cause us to backtrack, the diet pitfalls that keep us vacillating between “on the wagon” and “off the wagon”, and what to do about all of it.
I also decided a few weeks back to set up phone calls with women from all over the country to see what they were struggling with. As I suspected, almost all of them were frustrated with the same things my clients and I have struggled with in the past:
they are overwhelmed when it comes to taking care of themselves
all they think about is food and “fixing” their bodies
they are constantly comparing themselves to others
they don’t understand why they can’t just “stick with it”
they’re beating themselves up all the time
they’re stress and/or emotionally eating
they have no flexibility and are either all in or all out when it comes to food, self-care and fitness
Every day since 2013, I’ve tried to reach as many women as possible to help them with these super COMMON issues. But what has always frustrated me is that each woman I speak with feels ALONE, ISOLATED, and even ABNORMAL.
Yet between my own experience with 4 babies, interacting with over 4 million visitors to my site, the thousands of emails I get from my community, and the coaching I do with my 1:1 clients, I know that this isn’t true. So many moms are struggling with the triggers that can come along with a pregnant or post-partum body, causing them to use common dieting practices that DO NOT WORK and actually MAKE EVERYTHING WORSE.
So why do I seem to be the only one who knows this? Why are we all struggling in isolation?
Last year, when I was struggling with my business and nothing was working, I made the super-scary decision to invest over $15,000 to join a mentorship of female entrepreneurs, led by a coach who was doing EXACTLY what I wanted to be doing. I was so tired of shooting in the dark, so tired of going it alone, so exhausted from not having anyone’s feedback or support. What was I doing wrong? There were no answers, just frustration.
I looked around for meet-ups, but nothing was specific to exactly what I did and wanted…until I found the mentorship.
This past year has been nothing short of magical. The mysteries of how others made their businesses work were suddenly only a phone call, text, or an email away. The inspiration and action-taking of the women I was surrounded by was contagious.
This January on my flight home from our quarterly meet-up, I was thinking about how much this mentorship had changed not only what I was achieving but how I thought of myself…how the minute I signed up, I went from “someone struggling to run a business” to “Business Owner Who Invests In Herself and Her Life”.
Every day I coach moms who are struggling with dieting, food and body obsession, and their post-baby bodies. Often I will tell one client about an epiphany another one had, or how they approached the same struggle, and think to myself how much they would benefit from each other’s experience and support – in EXACTLY the same way I benefitted from the women in my group.
This sparked an idea.…what if I created a mentorship where I led these women through the same lessons and coaching that I use with my one-on-one clients, but offer it in a high-touch, intimate COMMUNITY setting instead? Something that offered a SAFE, body-positive, understanding, supportive environment with the chance to connect regularly?
I could teach the same exact lessons and strategies I teach my 1:1 clients, but in a community setting where everyone could connect over their own struggles, share their insights, feel validated and supported, and go through the process of healing food and body relationships and learning healthy eating patterns TOGETHER.
I started teaching this process and strategies years ago when I realized that I could hand macros and meal plans over to women to lose the baby weight, but if they weren’t in the right mindset, it either wouldn’t work at all, it would only work temporarily (and they’d gain it all back eventually) or they were still miserable because the food and body obsession never went away, even at their goal weight.
I believe that in this intimate community environment, these lessons can be even MORE effective as we observe other women like us learn to live with freedom and practice self-compassionate self-care; women who are living similar lives to ours.
I’ve been mulling this over for awhile, and finally decided to start privately inviting women to join that I knew would a) benefit tremendously and b) offer incredible insight to the group. And this dream group is slowly coming together.
This mentorship will be a PERFECT mix of women who have worked with me before and are familiar with my tools and strategies right alongside women who are brand new to my coaching and systems but are eager to learn.
You’ll be working directly with me each week for a fraction of what I charge my 1:1 clients, with the ADDED benefit of your own support network.
It’s called the Strength in Mothers Mentorship, and I’m accepting applications through next week, when the group will be getting started on our 6 month journey together.
Just a reminder – don’t forget to register for my free LIVE online workshop tomorrow (Wednesday) evening. I’ll be sharing my story with you, sharing the experiences of my clients, and connecting with each of you on your shared struggles as moms…you can register here:
Right now, I’m sitting in my bedroom near Dallas, TX typing away while you’re probably nowhere near here reading this (if you are, let’s get coffee!!).
Believe me, that idea blows my mind on a daily basis.
In the last 20 years our access to others has grown exponentially, both for the good (I get a constant stream of photos/video of my niece who lives three hours away!) and the bad (I’m constantly subjected to other people’s opinions that I never would have been before!).
But one of the downfalls that I’ve noticed until recently is that while we SEEM to be connected in the online world, it’s just no substitute for real face time. There is something so magical that occurs when we can look at each other and fully experience that we’re connecting with another human who understands us and is living a similar life. Facebook groups, emails, and texts are great, but nothing beats looking into someone’s eyes and seeing their expression as they sympathize with what you’re going through at the moment, or hearing the emotion in someone’s voice as they share their story.
Over the past year, I’ve been taking steps to get more face time with the women I want to help, women just like you.
The first thing I did was add online meetings to my 1:1 coaching. Wow, what a game-changer!! Before, the women in my program who checked in with me were just names and situations. It makes me sad that there are hundreds of women that I worked with in the past 5 years that I don’t even know what they looked like! But now, we meet every other week and truly connect, and these clients of mine feel like friends. We laugh together, we cry together, we celebrate breakthroughs face to face. Not only did this improve my coaching dramatically, it improved my quality of life. I LOVE coaching call days!
Last fall, I opened a short-term #FastFitMoms bootcamp for a handful of women, whom I taught healthy habits and mindset to for 8 weeks. During that bootcamp, we had evening online calls where we would all gather, look at each other’s faces, and share our breakthroughs and struggles. Again, this was so magical that the calls went WAY over time. We all enjoyed seeing each other as real moms, some of us juggling our kids during the calls, and not just avatars in a Facebook group.
And then recently I opened up my schedule to a do a select few strategy calls with my social media followers. Although I’ve only had a few calls this week (and one after I write this), each one of them has been more of the same magic – we connected over our common experiences, comforted through tears and frustration, and new friendships have been formed.
God, I love my job.
It was this desire to connect with YOU that I decided to put on a live online workshop to share my own struggles and transformation, to help you feel less alone, and to connect you with other moms who are feeling the way you are.
Overwhelmed, uncomfortable in a body that feels foreign and unrecognizable, and unsure what to do about it in a way that feels good.
I’m going to be teaching you the same tools I teach my 1:1 clients to approach their post-baby transformations with a self-care mindset, and you and others will have the chance to share your own stores and struggles.
And let me be super-vulnerable with you – I’m nervous! As an introvert who hermited behind my computer for years, I always get nervous to make new connections and put myself out there. BUT the biggest lesson I’ve learned in this past year of connection is that the discomfort is WORTH IT. I have not regretted it once and really, I can’t imagine my life now without those connections. It really was the missing piece.
So if you’re feeling disconnected from others and from your body, you can’t miss this free workshop! Join me tomorrow (Wednesday) evening at 8PM EST/ 5 PM PST. All you have to do is register at the link, check your email, click the link just before the workshop starts and it will launch from your desktop, laptop, or phone (you’ll need to download the Zoom app).
This past weekend I had the most magical trip to LA to meet up with my mastermind, a group of female entrepreneurs who share ideas and knowledge with each other.
We all started out as struggling business owners with dreams but no blueprint, a desire to succeed but no support. And by coming together and sharing what we know and by learning from one another, we’ve connected in a kind of sisterhood I never dreamt I’d be a part of.
I’ve always been an introvert, but I was feeling totally stuck and DESPERATE for my business to grow, and I didn’t know one other person trying to do what I was doing. So when this opportunity came up, I considered it pretty seriously.
I looked at the photos of the mastermind meetups, feeling totally intimidated…did I belong? Would I be accepted? Would I connect with anyone? Would they share their success secrets with me?
I almost didn’t join, and I actually had a good hard cry right beforehand. But last May I found myself on a plane to LA, and flew across the country alone for the first time ever.
And ever since, the result has been nothing short of magical.
Each time I connect with someone new in this group and we hit it off, I think to myself HOW CAN I POSSIBLY BE THIS CONNECTED WITH SO MANY AMAZING WOMEN?
We share, we laugh, we celebrate wins, we dissect losses. I always feel like I’m sitting on the shoulders of strong, kick-ass women who want my success as much as they want their own.
Which has really got me thinking…
How can I re-create this phenomenon for the thousands and thousands of new moms in my community who are desperate to connect and chat about the UNIQUE challenges they face as moms?
And how can I connect them to each other, while also helping them approach food and their bodies WITHOUT obsession and dieting?
Years ago when I was so desperate to lose the baby weight of my first three kids, I had no guidance except popular diets. I would white knuckle my way through a diet (low carb, etc), lose 20-30 lbs, then relax and gain it all back. Then when I did finally keep it off with a strict diet, I was so anxious and scared of food, scared of becoming a “frumpy” mom again, that it was ALL I thought about.
By the time I learned how to have a fit and healthy post-baby body without all the anxiety and imprisonment, it had been MORE THAN TWENTY YEARS.
That’s because no one, NO ONE, was talking about how to be balanced and in the right mindset. No one told me how I was sabotaging myself constantly, no one told me it wasn’t normal to be obsessed with food, and no one told me there was any other way than to diet and white-knuckle it.
I just thought I was broken.
And while I’ve managed to figure it out on my own, it has become my mission in life to help other new moms so they can get right to the freedom part and skip the obsession and anxiety BS.
I hear every single day from women who WANT to do just this but they are surrounded by others who have the same unhealthy relationships with food, are dieting and obsessed, or just don’t get what it’s like to be a new mom with a body that feels foreign in a world obsessed with thinness.
And now that I understand how important your environment is to your success, I want to start creating healthy environments for women to approach their postpartum bodies in, one in which they can connect with others who want what they want.
So to kick this idea off, I thought I’d offer a free, LIVE WORKSHOP where I’ll not only teach you the same principles I teach my clients about food and body freedom, but allow you the chance to connect with other moms about the unique challenges you face with balancing it all.
We’ll go over:
Why pregnancy and postpartum is our most vulnerable time to develop an unhealthy relationship with food/our bodies
What causes food and body obsession
The traps we fall into that keep us from reaching our goals and/or make us miserable
The steps to take to turn it all around, hop out of the cycle and start feeling better
In the spirit of connecting and sharing, I’ll also be sharing how I went from overweight mom and food obsessed, to fit mom and food obsessed, to fit mom and balanced. I’ll also be answering your questions you might have about your own struggles.