It used to be that my leadership coaching clients would start out with leadership topics, and then months down the line we’d shift our focus to the rest of their life: I’m not getting enough free time. I want to have more of a relationship with my family. I can’t keep up with this pace. These days, we’re moving there much quicker. Life issues are front and center, with the most common topics being feeling overwhelmed and having trouble focusing. While people have been overwhelmed for years, I’d say this trend has really spiked since Covid. And it’s no wonder, when you consider the volatile ..read more

I didn’t seek out this group—quarter-lifers, loosely defined as people in their mid-twenties to early thirties. In fact, when I started coaching over 20 years ago, I purposefully identified my niche as those aged forty-six to sixty. It’s certainly easy to see why people in this age group might seek out coaching, and why more and more resources are showing up for dealing with one’s quarter-life crisis. And now that I’ve had the privilege of working with so many clients in this age group, I’m noticing what I enjoy about it. Here are some of these observations, and what those of us in other age ..read more

We talked in an earlier post about why to use a coaching model. The 1, 2, 3 Coach model, also described in that post, was really helpful in the beginning. Then, to be honest, I got a bit bored with it. Coaching sessions were starting to all feel the same. And that can be one of the drawbacks of a model or a framework. After a while, even your client knows, “Okay, now they’re going to say, ‘Tell me more.'” I also discovered that things didn’t always flow in an orderly manner with the people I was coaching. Sometimes the conversation would leapfrog in different directions. That’s when I turned ..read more

Coaching models are not something we’ve discussed much on this blog. While the ICF coaching competencies give us a framework for assessing a coach’s effectiveness and skill, and guide coaches in how to grow and improve, they don’t give really practical suggestions for how to accomplish this. Why use a coaching model? I can think of three main benefits. First, it gives you a structure and format with which to coach. Second, it provides simple language to explain what coaching is or isn’t. I often use some kind of visual representation of a coaching model: a diagram, chart, or other image. And l ..read more

We’ve talked about how technology can challenge us and what backup measures we should have in place. But have you ever considered the incredible combination of functions and processes our bodies perform every day just to keep us functioning? A loose connection here, a weak signal there, and we’re not operating at full capacity. There are things we can do regularly to strengthen those signals, back up those functions, and maximize our functioning. These habits also make it easier to cope when things go wrong. It’s like working out at the gym. Even if we get into a slump, and we’re not going as ..read more

When we were moving into our new home a couple of years ago, we decided we didn’t need a landline anymore. Unfortunately, we moved to an area where the cell service is really poor. So we are almost totally dependent on the internet for any phone connection. Well, one Thursday, our internet just stopped. Every once in a while it would pop on, but then it would stop again. We called tech support on Friday, they ran a bunch of tests to finally determine there were two pods we needed to replace. But by then it was past their office hours on Friday. This wasn’t going to be solved in one day So we ..read more

On the theme of what I want to stop doing this year, I had an interesting conversation with my daughter about work-life balance, and she asked, “What if we switch the order?” I realized how powerful it is to put life first, even in how we describe this concept. I used to be good at putting life first, but some work-first practices are creeping back in. We talked in a previous post about checking email (specifically work email) first thing in the morning, and how that invites other people to determine our priorities for the day. It’s also about blocking time in my calendar—time and space for m ..read more

“Half the leaders I have met don’t need to learn what to do. They need to learn what to stop.”—Peter Trucker, as quoted in What Got You Here Won’t Get You There by Marshall Goldsmith I’ve read it before, but this quote really resonated with me recently. I thought, if that’s true, then maybe instead of making New Year’s resolutions about the things we’re going to do this year, maybe we should talk about what to stop doing. What are we going to stop? One thing for me is checking email. Obviously, I’m not going to stop altogether, but I can certainly stop checking it so much. Here are a few idea ..read more

I’ve done the math, and so when I set annual goals for my business, I plan to complete them in 10 months, not 12. Partly because I usually take a month off in the summer, and partly because I know December’s not going to be as productive as I want it to be. There are traditionally fewer work days in December, between holiday closures and vacation plans (your own, your clients’, or others you work with). That, and our focus is undeniably split between our personal and work lives—possibly even more than it usually is—which can drain our energy. So what do you plan to do with your limited time a ..read more

Well, it’s December, and we’re into the holiday season. Whatever you celebrate, this is undeniably a busy time. So how can we take care of ourselves in the midst of extra activity and expectations? How can we cope with the busyness and the stress and the shopping and the family and all the different things that come up? I invite you to consider simple solutions—as simple as a walk and a nap. I found myself filling those self-care prescriptions one afternoon, and reflecting on what a gift I’d given myself. Earlier in my life I did a lot of running and biking, but now I just I like walking. The ..read more