Secret Theater was a Patreon side show we did covering film adaptations of our favorite (and not-so-favorite) video games. Since the Patreon and the show are on hiatus, the show became unavailable. We decided to upload them and hope you enjoy us talking about goofy movies. Okay, I know you're expecting a lot of jokes about the fact that they cast Jake Gyllenhaal to play a Persian prince. But what you're not expecting is snake-based martial arts ..read more

Secret Theater was a Patreon side show we did covering film adaptations of our favorite (and not-so-favorite) video games. Since the Patreon and the show are on hiatus, the show became unavailable. We decided to upload them and hope you enjoy us talking about goofy movies. Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within was a technical landmark and set a new standard for what animation could do back in 2001. It's also a weird, slow mess that almost killed Squaresoft with a big, glowing jellyfish. Is it good, though ..read more

Secret Theater was a Patreon side show we did covering film adaptations of our favorite (and not-so-favorite) video games. Since the Patreon and the show are on hiatus, the show became unavailable. We decided to upload them and hope you enjoy us talking about goofy movies. We all knew it would happen eventually. The Aliens are versusing the Predators. And in the exact place you would expect to find these two space monsters: a pyramid under Antarctica. Lance Hendrickson is there, too ..read more

Secret Theater was a Patreon side show we did covering film adaptations of our favorite (and not-so-favorite) video games. Since the Patreon and the show are on hiatus, the show became unavailable. We decided to upload them and hope you enjoy us talking about goofy movies. Uwe Boll's adaptation of Alone in the Dark features a bunch of army guys for some reason. And Edward Carnby, played by Christian Slater, lives in a warehouse with a canopy bed in the center of it. It's still not the worst product associated with the franchise, not by a long shot ..read more

Secret Theater was a Patreon side show we did covering film adaptations of our favorite (and not-so-favorite) video games. Since the Patreon and the show are on hiatus, the show became unavailable. We decided to upload them and hope you enjoy us talking about goofy movies. Tekken, the live action film from 2010, is an incredibly dour and joyless adaptation of a game where a demon-man fights karate robots in order to take control of a corporation. This movie doesn't feature robots or demons or even any pandas, but it does have Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa as Heihachi so that's fun ..read more

Secret Theater was a Patreon side show we did covering film adaptations of our favorite (and not-so-favorite) video games. Since the Patreon and the show are on hiatus, the show became unavailable. We decided to upload them and hope you enjoy us talking about goofy movies. This time, it's Hitman, a movie the lead actor has openly referred to as a personal low-point. It features a hilarious sword fight and honestly not much else. But it is, technically, a motion picture ..read more

Secret Theater was a Patreon side show we did covering film adaptations of our favorite (and not-so-favorite) video games. Since the Patreon and the show are on hiatus, the show became unavailable. We decided to upload them and hope you enjoy us talking about goofy movies. This time we discuss Silent Hill: Revelations 3D Third Strike Xrd 2nd GIG. The second Silent Hill movie is a very very loose adaption of the third Silent Hill game made by people who think Heather should've hooked up with Vincent ..read more

Secret Theater was a Patreon side show we did covering film adaptations of our favorite (and not-so-favorite) video games. Since the Patreon and the show are on hiatus, the show became unavailable. We decided to upload them and hope you enjoy us talking about goofy movies. This time, we talk about the film version of Double Dragon which shifts Billy and Jimmy's adventures to the post apocalypse and also there's a magic amulet for some reason ..read more

Secret Theater was a Patreon side show we did covering film adaptations of our favorite (and not-so-favorite) video games. Since the Patreon and the show are on hiatus, the show became unavailable. We decided to upload them and hope you enjoy us talking about goofy movies. This time, we get our butts to Mars where Karl Urban and Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson get up to some very Resident Evil style antics. But the movie's called Doom ..read more

Secret Theater was a Patreon side show we did covering film adaptations of our favorite (and not-so-favorite) video games. Since the Patreon and the show are on hiatus, the show became unavailable. We decided to upload them and hope you enjoy us talking about goofy movies. First up, Paul W.S. Anderson's Resident Evil! A total mess that ended up spawning a massive series of sequels. Hey, that sounds familiar ..read more