The rise of the freelance slopywriter
Email Marketing Maverick
by Kelvin Dorsey
2M ago
  Dear subscriber, What makes someone a well-adjusted and compos mentis member of society? Is it their income? Their social status? Their character? Maybe it’s the skill of nodding along to your friend’s conspiracy theories without rolling your eyes, or not knee-jerkily commenting on every online post you disagree with or… resisting the urge to engage in queue rage when some slob cuts the line. Listen, that stuff’s all well and good, but perhaps the better question is this: What is the one trait that all self-aware and successful people (winners) have that losers don’t have? Save your bre ..read more
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Even Knuckle-Dragging, Slack-Jawed Mouth Breathers Know to Do This
Email Marketing Maverick
by Kelvin Dorsey
4M ago
  “I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.” ~ Steven Wright   Dear subscriber, A favorite quote of mine is from the great American football coach Vince Lombardi. He once yelled this: PRACTICE DOES NOT MAKE PERFECT.  PERFECT PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT!!! Agreed. Think about it. What happens if you practice something the wrong way? It’s simple: You get really good at doing it the wrong way. No good. Now, below is another quote I like.  It’s from an old English dame you’ve probably heard about. “Amateurs practice till they get it right; professionals practice till the ..read more
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In the year 3,000
Email Marketing Maverick
by Kelvin Dorsey
4M ago
  Dear subscriber, You should always try and be as logical and rational as humanly possible when making decisions. American billionaire investor, hedge fund manager, and inner circle member (he’s not, but he should be!) Ray Dalio concurs: “Logic, reason, and common sense are your best tools for synthesizing reality and what to do with it.” The reality is, most people have rarely picked up those tools, much less used them. But wise words, nonetheless. But I put to you that there is an area in life where you should kick logic to the curb and pick up and embrace irrationality like a long-los ..read more
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Can You Guess The Book?
Email Marketing Maverick
by Kelvin Dorsey
6M ago
Dear subscriber, Can you guess the book? First clue: This book is over 600,000 words long. Second clue: It was written in three languages across three continents. Huh? You think it’s Madeleine de Scudéry’s Artamène ou le Grand Cyrus? BZZZT! Wrong answer. Third clue: It’s the most stolen book. Fourth clue: Hunter S Thompson read it for writing inspiration. Did you say The Great Gatsby? Hah, hahaha. You’re more off-target than a Shaq free throw! No, silly, it’s the Bible! Ya, know, Donald Trump’s favorite book. I heard he only reads a pocket-sized Bible because it makes his hands appear larger ..read more
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The Most Useless Book on Email Copywriting Ever?
Email Marketing Maverick
by Kelvin Dorsey
9M ago
“Hoax! Scam!! Fraud!!!”, they bark. I’m referring to folks who knee-jerkily buy online courses only to jump on some forum and cry foul. “I bought So-and-So’s course, and it didn’t work!”, they yelp. No, Chi-Chi… ... YOU Didn’t Work! Most people who buy online courses and information products barely get past the first module, that’s if they even cracked it open. These folks major in intentions and minor in follow-through. And then they have the nerve to call the course creator a fraud. Now imagine this: A bunch of people sign up for a gym membership. Over the next three months, most of these ne ..read more
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Check Out This Snapshot
Email Marketing Maverick
by Kelvin Dorsey
9M ago
  Dear subscriber, Saw an interesting picture online the other day. Oh yeah, tell me about this picture, Kelvin. Alright. It was a photo taken at Jeff Bezos’ engagement party. A lavish affair on Bezos’ $500 million dollar superyacht where stupidly expensive champagne flowed and the rich and famous rubbed shoulders. Well anyway, I’ll describe this snapshot. In one corner of the frame, you got Bezos with a big shit-eating grin and looking cool and sophisticated as never, side by side with the cinematic legend, Leonardo DiCaprio. Bezos is working the room, surrounded by a bevy of beauties. A ..read more
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Quit It!
Email Marketing Maverick
by Kelvin Dorsey
9M ago
  Dear subscriber, Once upon a time… A laydee was strolling through her local neighborhood when she came upon a guy who was smoking two cigarettes at once. The laydee approached the man and politely asked why he was smoking two cigarettes. “That’s because I smoke one for myself and one for my buddy in prison”, the man replied. Oh, I see, said the laydee. A few weeks later, the laydee sees the same man smoking just one cigarette. The laydee approached the man and said, “I noticed you’re only smoking one cigarette today. Did your friend get released from prison?” “No, he’s still in prison ..read more
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8 Wallet-Fattening Email Ideas
Email Marketing Maverick
by Kelvin Dorsey
9M ago
  Dear subscriber, Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand, and Papa Maverick drops value-filled emails into his undyingly loyal subscribers’ inboxes. In other words, it’s just business as usual. That’s right, my friend, today is just another day. Or is it? Yup. It’s just another day. That said, it doesn’t have to be an unprofitable day, now does it? Nay, it Doth Not! Listen, if you’re smart enough to have an email list of customers, below are some ideas you could use right now to bring in some of that sweet do-re-mi. These ideas may not be sexy, but they’ve got teeth! Kinda like the ..read more
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From Good To Grating
Email Marketing Maverick
by Kelvin Dorsey
9M ago
Dear subscriber, A few months back, I started watching a TV series called Goliath. To explain it in one sentence, it’s a legal drama that pits this washed-up lawyer, played by Billy Bob Thornton, against these big, bad corporate giants. Well anyhow, after a few episodes, I was hooked. I then discovered this show has four seasons, so I was elated. That meant I had my TV viewing sorted for the next month or two. Perfect. Except it didn’t work out that way. I shall explain. I absolutely loved seasons 1 and 2. I flew through them like Doogie Howser flew through high school, and then I get to seaso ..read more
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A Star-Studded Email
Email Marketing Maverick
by Kelvin Dorsey
9M ago
  Dear subscriber, Quick question: What makes a good TV show or movie? The actors? Nah. The director? Nuh-uh. The producer? Nope. They are all factors, of course, but they are not ultimately what makes a TV show or movie good. What makes a good TV show or movie is simply this: … A Good Script! It’s true. Aw man, you subscribers are all cut from the same skeptical cloth. You think just because Papa Maverick has never set foot on a Hollywood set that I’m talking out me heinie. When will you learn that Papa Maverick is not like everyone else? I don’t need qualifications, experiential knowled ..read more
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