Previously on The Stuff Behind The Stuff... When we last left our heroine, she was mulling over an objective, systematic approach to decluttering decisions and reminiscing about her days in the legal/financial world. Well, maybe not exactly reminiscing, but certainly remembering a lot. We join her this week as she continues her quest to find the ultimate solution for her objet de curiosité - her "deal cube." Will she crack the code for objectively working through her choice? And if she does, will it make sense to anyone but her?? Let's tune in (cue the harp)... ...OK, so for ..read more

Once upon a time, in a city far, far away, I used to work in corporate America. I was a paralegal/compliance officer/stock plan administrator in the legal department for a huge, overly-complicated real estate investment company. This all sounds way more business-y and official than I actually am, or ever have been for that matter - it was mostly a matter of this job being the only game in town for me when we lived in New Mexico. I used to joke that I wasn't a registered investment rep in real life; I just played one in a cubicle. I learned a few things that have come in handy here and there, a ..read more

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can literally goof up my brain. When I'm talking with clients, particularly in some of our very first conversations, I frequently hear words of fear, struggle, and confrontation. Sometimes even warlike terms. "I'm tired of wrestling with my goals." "I'm gearing up to do battle with my paperwork." "It's like my planner and I are in a broken relationship." "This closet terrifies me." "I have to conquer my cluttered desk." There's some hyperbole in there, for sure, and I'm trained to listen for ..read more

So I had this one Instagram post earlier in the month that got quite a few comments. It always surprises me what resonates - the picture wasn't all that great. No one would mistake me for being an IG expert or "influencer" or anything like that (don't care to be), and I don't pretend to understand why a shot of an empty Ikea bag can get tons of "likes" but a fabulous Margaret Atwood quote doesn't. But in this particular post, I wrote a few thoughts about the big question that comes up every January: "What's the best planner?" They seemed to hit a nerve. I ruminated a bit that I should have sav ..read more

I was thinking about compassion, or loving-kindness meditations this weekend. Research shows that practicing this type of meditation, whether directed towards others, self, or both, can do all sorts of amazing things: increase wellbeing, decrease migraines, even increase gray matter volume in the brain. You can find all kinds of resources and practices with a quick search. Many of you will find being compassionate towards other people, at least people you know and care about, much more comfortable than towards yourself. I know I do - I am big-time tough on me, and this type of practice felt ..read more

I was asked recently to write a piece for our church newsletter. Since many of us are in a season of celebration, and it's the Winter Solstice, I decided to rework it a bit and share it with you. No preaching, just some musing. :) This strange, unsettling year has provided new perspectives on how we all utilize space, and what our surroundings can mean for us. Whether it's six feet of social distance in a store, or maneuvering with and around partners/kids/pets as we work and learn from home, we've had to adapt in ways big and small. We see through our Zoom windows into the homes of coworker ..read more

It's "Black Friday," at least, it was when I started this post. By the time I finish and upload this, there will have been an entire weekend devoted to encouraging us to shop the right way (i.e., in a way that supports commerce). I don't buy into Black Friday, literally or figuratively, but I know plenty of people who like to use it as a way to get all of the shopping for their holidays completed. In that sense, I suppose, you could argue that it's a system for finishing something. Giving a time container to the shopping drill means a better chance of providing closure to what can be ..read more

This post is a follow up to Part 1, and something I don't do much anymore: a "how-to."  It is, not to put too fine a point on it, a way to organize a beginning approach to meditation. Because frankly, the staggering amount of information on meditation makes it challenging to know where or how to start - and starting is all you need to think about, if you're new to the process. I'm hoping to take some of the pressure off by giving you a little step-by-step (with the caveat, always, that you may devise another way to go about it).  And let's revisit the why. What does meditation ..read more

It was tough to find a good pic for this post. ​ Here comes one of those themes again. You know, the times where something comes up repeatedly across sessions that catches my attention. And while it's not exactly along the lines of decision-making, or meditation, that we've been talking about in past posts, it's definitely related. It's around the disconnect between what people think a space or project is, and what it actually is.  It's like going to one of those haunted house attractions that pop up around Halloween (hey, remember those? Gee, what's my favorite holid ..read more

Show of hands out there - who has tried, and given up on, meditation? Or just wondered about it? Or completely pooh-poohed the idea? It's everywhere. You read about it on popular websites and threads. Your therapist told you to try it, and your annoyingly optimistic best friend swears by it. Maybe you don't trust the concept, or you think it has something to do with religion (no), or have to know some sort of secret handshake (perhaps now, a secret elbow bump). Maybe you've gotten the impression that you have to sit entirely still to be able to do it (also, no). I even had someone tell me the ..read more