Part I: The Monster
Surviving Garrett
by An Author
5y ago
I find talking about Garrett Sweeterman difficult now, as though I’m sharing the stories of a character from a book- an antagonist, a despot, a stranger who I knew so intimately for so long, but never really knew at all. A villain whose deeper ambitions remain unknown to me, even though our lives are completely intertwined. I wish I could break the tether that anchors me to him, but our daughter makes that impossible. I sometimes let my mind wander – Why is he doing this? How does he sleep at night? How does he live with himself? Does he think of her, of me? I come up blank. I have no answ ..read more
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Part II: The Affair
Surviving Garrett
by An Author
5y ago
Trigger Warning: Graphic text and descriptions about sex and sexual assault in this story. They say to truly know someone’s story, you have to go back to the beginning. For me, that’s a long way back over rugged and steep terrain. I could write a three-part novel series of my life up to the point I met Garrett, so cramming it all in here would do my story a disservice. Forced to put it all in less than two pages, these are the most important stories. Some of the stories in my past aren’t even mine to tell – they belong to my mother and father, who were parents too young and did the ..read more
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Part III: The Pregnancy
Surviving Garrett
by An Author
5y ago
Trigger warning: This essay contains graphic sexual content and descriptions of emotional and physical abuse. When Garrett and I were in an “off” period in September, meaning he had decided not to answer my calls or respond to my texts after the last time we had sex, things at home were getting worse. I moved into my own place during the summer, leaving my husband at the home we had shared together to figure his own way out. But he let the lease run out on our previous home, and said he would be leaving to New York if he didn’t have a place to stay. I fought him on it. I said no. I ..read more
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Part IV: Retaliation
Surviving Garrett
by An Author
5y ago
Five days. That’s how long it took Garrett to destroy my life. My job. My degree. My own sanity. Everything I had worked for. All of the adversity I had overcome. I was a hungry, determined girl, with no pennies to spare, but no shortage of dreams. I grew into a hungrier, more determined woman, with a family, a life, living a dream I was never truly sure was possible. With a few more pennies. He took so much from me. I knew growing up that a bank could take your car, your landlord can evict you from home, and yes, people you love can hurt you. But the one thing no one ..read more
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Part V: The Investigation
Surviving Garrett
by An Author
5y ago
Garrett was a man of many faces. Lover. Abuser. Saint. Liar. Hero. Villain. Victim. Victim was his favorite. He really loved playing the victim. He changed who he was so frequently that it’s amazing it took so long for him to screw up. To get caught. He couldn’t tell his story the same way  twice, and once he was being interviewed and investigated by five different entities – HR, Student Rights, Title IX, police, lawyers – eventually his stories started to fall apart. Depending on who asked, Garrett would describe us as either two people who couldn’t keep their hands off each ..read more
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Part VI: Victim, Villain, Verdict
Surviving Garrett
by An Author
5y ago
November… December… January… February… The months rolled by in a haze. My stomach got bigger. My list of potential names for the baby grew longer. Johannes or Sebastian for a boy. Aurora or Evelyn for a girl. I wonder if he’ll have Garrett’s eyes. Maybe just Hans for short, or Desmond for a boy. How about Emma or Celeste for a girl. Will she have his smile and his blonde curls? I liked Raphael and Luna. Does he want to know if it’s a boy or a girl? He always said the baby was going to be a girl. He said he “just had a feeling.” Then came the first ultrasound in D ..read more
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Part VII: Redemption
Surviving Garrett
by An Author
5y ago
I stayed as far away from Garrett as I could after he had me arrested on March 2. My husband had enough. “If you talk to him, if you go see him again, I will leave,” he told me. “I will love and take care of our children, and I will still love you, but I can’t do this again. I can’t watch you do this to yourself. To our baby. To our family. “ He was scared, angry and hurt. He was right. I immediately re-filed my restraining order. I blocked Garrett on all of my social media accounts – no more perusing my profiles whenever he pleased. He called me, but I didn’t answer. He threatene ..read more
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Part VIII: Do you have a soul, Garrett?
Surviving Garrett
by An Author
5y ago
The part of the essay series describes current and ongoing issues, and will be updated as events continue to unfold. Check back for updates. When you have children, you surrender so many of the small pleasures you never realized you had. Sure, I had a son already, but he was older – almost nine years old now. It had been a very long time since we had middle-of-the-night feedings and diapers and baby food and so on. You give up sleep lasting more than a few hours at a time. You stop caring about getting dressed, or putting on makeup, or washing your hair every day. You accept th ..read more
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