Love Island is getting a bit of stick for featuring only the young and the beautiful. So I got to wondering what would it be like if they moved all the girls out and replaced them with menopausal women! I think it might go a bit like this: Voice Over Man: “Welcome to Love Island. Sponsored by Tena Lady. Tensions are brewing in Paradise tonight as the 10 menopausal women brought in yesterday to replace the previous female contestants make their presence known. We have to share the sad news that Joe has made the decision to leave the show. His experience of 3 years living with a menopausal mothe ..read more

There are many things people don’t tell you about the menopause – and all are perhaps typified by this incident that took place the other day as I arrived at work. I went to get into the lift and two men barged past me hitting the button for floor 19 – completely oblivious to me. Menopausal invisibility – that is one thing that the menopause guides don’t warn you about. Ironic when often it is a time when you are fatter than you have ever been. One day you just wake up and it’s like the world doesn’t see you anymore and all of a sudden you realise what a youth obsessed world we live in. I got ..read more

I’m still wandering around singing PAPERBACK WRITER by the beatles the novelty of having a book for sale on amazon has not worn off…. Was it easy? Was it feck? My first writing day was supposed to go like this: • 7.30am – Up and breakfast • 8.00am-12.00pm – Develop outline for book on my laptop in dining room where everything has been set up ready to goo • 12.00pm – Lunch • 12.00-5.00pm – Write first three chapters and a synopsis ready to send to Agents • 5.00pm – Dinner • 5.00pm – 8.00pm Review chapters and synopsis ready to email to agents tomorrow It actually went like this: • 10am Get out ..read more

This morning I watched the menopause be discussed on BBC Breakfast. I also listened to Zoe Ball chat about it on Radio 2 with Andrea Mclean. Two events that would have been unheard of for our mothers generation when the topic was so taboo! Despite this, it can be easy to get despondent about the menopause and the lack of support there is for women as they go through this transition. The average age of female suicide in the UK is 51-55 – the same as the average age of menopause. I doubt that is a co-incidence. But we are so much luckier than the generations who have gone before us. In their da ..read more

I am continuing to try and do lots of things that I have never done before as I approach the Big 50! This week it was Hot Yoga. I had to go alone as every friend I asked said things along the lines of ‘feck off – just come to the pub” and “no feckin way – it will be full of farting skinny vegans’. Billed as burning 1200 calories in 90 minutes – I was sold!! Hell that’s a mars bar, a bag of chips, a jack daniels and coke and a glass of wine!! I get there and it appears that people group according to their ‘tribe’. At the front the slim and the beautiful with very trendy tight shorts and crop t ..read more

Hello   It is Sweet Dog here again – I have appointed myself not only Guest Blogger but also ‘Manager’ as think that is a good job for me.   My Human ‘Galloping Catastrophe’ says I am employed on a results only basis and will be paid in biscuits and walks. I have to get 10 pledges for our fabulous illustrated humour book on our Menopausal Musings in order to get 3 biscuits and a walk to my favourite river to cool down.   As you can see from the picture I have been thinking deeply how to do this. And I think I have some great ideas   First – I called the publisher and they g ..read more

I’ve been watching the excellent ‘After Life’ with Ricky Gervais. I am loving it for a number of reasons – but in particular for his behaviour now he is all out of fucks. As a menopausal woman I can relate to that. My fucks are disappearing in direct correlation to the disappearance of my memory, eggs, eyebrows, waist and wrinkle free skin. But the loss of fucks I find something to celebrate. I gave so many fucks when I was younger. Far too many fucks – but now they are flying into my metaphorical Fuck Bucket – which is fit to overflow now. I look back fondly sometimes at those fucks but in t ..read more

Hiya – Sweet Dog again – after the success of my last post I have decided to come along and be a guest contributer again. I did well last time and my human was annoyed coz I got more likes that her. Ha Ha. Might start my own doggyblog! Well I don’t know if I mentioned earlier but I am seven and a half years old. This means I am 52.5 in human years. And I suspect I might be going through the dogopaws (see what I did there…). I am definitely getting middle aged spread. Got weighed at the vets the other week and he was horrible and said I was overweight and that my human should feed me less. I w ..read more

So – I am trying thinking of giving my car up. I have told Hemp Oil Harriet that I am doing it for the environment but the truth is that menopausal poverty (last bill £75 for supplements and a replacement ladycare magnet) means that running a car I don’t use that often is becoming a luxury I can’t afford! Before making such a drastic move – I decided to have a practice. Last night I was off to South Queensferry to meet a friend for dinner. One big benefit of trying the bus out rather than drive is that I can partake of cocktails and wine. Big Tick for public transport. A bit of playing around ..read more

Hello Everyone And firstly – massive thanks for reading this  blog and giving me the confidence to attempt to turn it into a book… Sweet Dog and I have been working away on said book And we now have an agent.. and a publisher… But for the book to become a reality – I need about 300 people to buy the book upfront. If anyone reading would like to support Galloping Catastrophe  in this endeavor – I would be so grateful… the link is below. Have a look and see what you think. I will keep you updated on progress.. xxx https://unbound.com/books/galloping-catastrophe ..read more