I’ve started chatting to a French guy on the dating app Bumble.  I saw him, recognised him, swiped right and was quite surprised to see that we matched.  You see, we’ve come across each other before, a couple of years ago, again on the dating app Bumble. We did actually meet up.  One evening, over two years ago.  It was a bit of a confusing encounter.  We had a drink, or rather I had a drink, he doesn’t drink…  We… The post Anything (well almost) for a French man appeared first on The Single Swan ..read more

My most popular blog post warns men of the challenges of dating single mums. Obviously, us single mothers are great, but I do think that there are some things that any prospective future partner needs to be aware of when dating a single mother.  In my post on the challenges of dating single mums, I warn that my child will always come first…and that sometimes things get a bit tough with my ex…and that I have to plan any social… The post Challenges of dating single mums : the Good, the Bad & the Ugly appeared first on The Single Swan ..read more

When I feel awkward or a little uncomfortable I retreat into myself, like a tortoise retracting its head into its shell, or like a hedgehog which when scared hides its head, belly, feet and legs in a prickly coat of erect spines. I go from being quite chatty and engaged to being quite withdrawn and pensive.  I listen, rather than talk.  I ask questions of others, rather than offer my opinions or stories.  I go into receive mode.  I can… The post He left me by the pianist in Washington Square Park appeared first on The Single Swan ..read more

This isn’t the first time I have written about the advantages of being a single parent.  One of the big advantages if you are co-parenting, (and there aren’t many advantages so you do have to make the most of them) is that you get a free babysitter on a fortnightly basis.  On Friday night, primarily to do some research for you all (honest!) I went to the Victoria and Albert museum (V&A) and their themed night on the Future of… The post Do you know what a French kiss looks like?  appeared first on The Single Swan ..read more

I have been thinking a lot about data and algorithms recently.  After a disastrous date a couple of weeks ago I have been thinking that I might need to change my approach to the whole dating problem.  I have been wondering: Can data find my future husband?  What kind of algorithm would I need? I turned to Google, the oracle, the harborer of all knowledge, intelligence and a whole heap of useless and distracting information and false facts and I… The post Can data find my future husband? appeared first on The Single Swan ..read more

Last Friday I went on the second worst date I have ever been on.  We both swiped right on Bumble.  He was fairly chatty.  Some of his early questions were a bit deep and direct considering that we’d never met;  he asked me why a partner might want to split up with me.  I found this a curious question, but I answered because I have an aversion to small talk and sometimes you just have to cut to the chase. … The post The second worst date I’ve ever been on appeared first on The Single Swan ..read more

I have wonderful people in my life; does it matter that I haven’t found The One ? It happens all the time.  By the time we reach our thirties our group of school friends, or university mates is replaced by a husband or a wife.  We move out of the city, where our closest companions have lived in close proximity for the last five years, to the suburbs or to the country.  Our city lives are replaced by suburbia and… The post Does it matter that I haven’t found the one ? appeared first on The Single Swan ..read more

I make no bones of the fact that sometimes I would quite like to have a boyfriend. Only sometimes though!  Secret single behaviours are those weird things that people do when they are alone, away from the prying eyes of the public and away from the ears of those who may condemn or criticise. My secret single behaviours include sitting on my own on the sofa eating dark Lindt chocolate and drinking wine in the evening.  I am not sure… The post What are your secret single behaviours? appeared first on The Single Swan ..read more

My phone vibrates in my pocket.  It’s a notification from Bumble, the Tinder-style dating app where women message first, “you have a new connection”.  The dopamine hit lasts a mere millisecond.  I am not the first to talk about Tamagotchi dating.  Internet dating is like trying to keep a Tamagotchi alive. I open up the match to find that Andrew* has three photos (of which two are clearly selfies) and has stated that he is 6’2” in his bio.  Nothing… The post Internet dating is like trying to keep a Tamagotchi alive: Tamagotchi dating appeared first on The Single Swan ..read more

People are no longer leaving love down to serendipitous encounters.  Instead they are actively looking for it.  Dating apps abound.  Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and Snapchat all provide opportunities to find ‘love’.  But has social media killed romance ? All information about a prospective date is laid out before us.  Name, age, height, occupation, an inspirational quote and a few posed photos make up a typical dating profile.  Once swiped off the screen, our prospective date is replaced by another, and… The post Has social media killed romance ? appeared first on The Single Swan ..read more