Do you wonder if you’re good enough? Does the question, “Am I good enough?” drive your actions to: Do better at work? Be a better friend, father, mother, lover? Lose weight, get fitter, run further, swim faster? Have a bigger home, better car, more friends on Facebook? Earn more money, grow your business, build your career? That question has driven me for more than five decades and I hear these questions come up again and again with my clients: “How do I prove to myself that I am enough?” and “How do I prove to others that I am enough?” We don’t often ask these questions explicitly.  Th ..read more

Boundaries for Nice Guys Are you a Nice Guy? Do you strive to be agreeable, accommodating, prioritise other people’s needs and ignore your own for a quiet life or to avoid confrontation? Being Nice may not be getting you all that you want James kept getting screwed over.  He would go along with other people’s plans to make things easy and have a quiet life.  Then get frustrated that things would not work out the way he wanted them to.  Friends would suggest meeting for a Chinese meal.  Even though James would prefer an Indian, he’d say nothing and feel resentful about spend ..read more

The Day Rejection Changed my Life for the Better How are you when you experience rejection? When you do something that might lead to rejection, how do you behave?  Do you hold back and not put in your all? When you take action, are you actually looking for acknowledgement from others?  What happens if you don’t get it?  How do you respond if the feedback is critical? The fear of rejection has plagued me all my life.  From an early age, the drive to receive praise and acknowledgments from others has been powerful.  For some, it leads to perfectionism- if I can just get ..read more

What voice have you been trained to listen to? The external voice of teachers, parents, authority figures and those around you?  Or the inner voice of your Sovereign Leadership? Voice of Inner Guidance If you are anything like me, you are well trained in listening to the external voices.  Those generally well-meaning people who told, ordered, scolded, insisted, demanded, asserted, persuaded or coerced you to do what they wanted you to do. And, like me, you probably fought against those voices at certain times in your life.  As if an inner knowing was stronger than those externa ..read more

There is an investment in your life, whether it is the work you do, building relationships with family, friends and colleagues or life projects.  There is the time, energy and focus.  And then there is a depth to your investment that takes time to drop into and therefore takes time to step out of. Exploring Narnia It is like walking through the back of the wardrobe into Narnia.  You can hang around the lamp close to the doorway and barely experience anything of the magical world beyond.  If you do, it takes moments to transition between the two worlds.  Or, you can ex ..read more

Are you Standing tall in your Sovereign Leadership? What if with a simple shift of your body, you could have 100% confidence in your leadership ability and decision making? When I see great leadership, I see people who are: Leadership is an inherent quality in all living things. In the language of archetypes, that inherent quality is Sovereign. All living things have the inherent ability to stand in their sovereignty. Decisive Visionary Compassionate Fierce Impactful Passionate Focused Disciplined Effective Community-minded Nurturing Relationship-builders Empathic Innovative Creative These ..read more

In Search of Worth This week I read a LinkedIn post from one of my connections whose close friend had taken his life.  He said that awareness alone was not enough.  The time for action had come.  It got me thinking about what action could be taken and what contribution I could bring.  My thoughts instinctively landed on self-worth.  And so, I went on an exploration about worth and how it impacts your ability to step out into the world as well as your mental health, well-being and sense of self. Worth Defined One distinction I discovered was the difference between conti ..read more

How a Medical Issue led to Greater Self Worth and Being Called Forth I wanted to share with you my learning from a recent medical issue. Just to say, all is well. In fact, I have not felt better, physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. You will see why as I share. And the reason to share? Well, it crystallises my own learning and it may offer some insight for your own journey of personal growth and self-mastery. At the very least, it might be a good read. Enough Already I have spent the last 50 years building up “David Brown” to be good enough, loveable enough, worthy enough, smart ..read more

What are the risks and rewards of hiding behind a mask? Have you ever been in a job or a relationship where you felt that you were not being yourself?  That by wearing a mask, you would fit in and make that job or relationship work somehow.  Perhaps you really needed the job or felt like it was the job you “should” go for.  Or maybe you didn’t want to be alone, so you were prepared to enter a relationship and hide parts of yourself or put on a show, so that you would feel loved? Some might say this is putting your best foot forward.  That you are making the effort to give a ..read more

Conflict and Three Strategies for Self-Management Conflict is inherent in your everyday experience.  You meet conflict at the school gate, in traffic, at work, in your home, with friends, family and strangers.  And internal conflict is a real thing too, when you live out of alignment with your values and purpose and your inner critics are keeping you safe and small. Therefore, this article is about “everyday” conflict and not difficult trauma or significant conflict.  I will mention these more adverse forms of conflict briefly, and point to some resources you might explore if yo ..read more