Have you ever wondered if you are a sex addict? Sexual addiction, sexual compulsivity, or hypersexual disorder (whichever term you use) is a pattern of out of control sexual behavior with an inability to stop despite adverse consequences. Many people that come to BeFree Counseling are wondering if they might be struggling with compulsive sexual behaviors and if they might be facing an actual addiction. If you’ve ever wondered about your own behavior and whether your struggles might be classifiable as an addiction, there is a simple series of questions you can answer that will help you begin to ..read more

It’s the New Year season again! Every January brings the opportunity take stock of the year that has passed and look ahead to the new year. As we reflect, we can remember all that God has done for us. We can think back on all the reasons we have to be grateful. On the other hand, we can identify the areas that may not have been as successful or healthy as we’d hoped. As we look ahead to the new year, we can be introspective and look at the parts of our lives that we’d like to cease, continue, change or improve. As you look ahead to the New Year, I would like to extend an invitation for you to ..read more

A healthy sexual legacy is a relatively new idea for me. Early in my own recovery process I began to realize the wrong messages I received about sex growing up – messages from my culture, my family and from my peers. I began to understand how that impacted me as an adolescent and as an adult. My wife and I made the decision that we would create a different kind of experience for our five kids and leave a healthier sexual legacy for them. Creating a healthy sexual legacy for your kids is critical to their spiritual, emotional and physical health. It’s not easy but it’s worth the investment. Po ..read more

Sex can be such a heavy topic, right? Just the mention of the word can create instant anxiety for many of us. It’s not easy for us to talk about is it? Sex and sexuality are so integral to our identities as men and women. Think about the ways you discuss sex today. Think about the ways you have experienced sex over the course of your life. Think about the ways you express yourself sexually. All of these dynamics had their beginnings in the messages you have received about sex throughout your live Messages from Family Our families begin to shape our view of sex and our understanding of own per ..read more

Love. The word was printed on the cover of my wedding invitations and yet it wasn’t until years later that I realized I had no idea what love really was. After getting married the euphoric feelings slowly faded and love slowly became difficult, awkward and just plain inconvenient. Frustrated and looking for answers, I remember reading Gary Chapman’s book, The 5 Love Languages. It was then that I realized that my husband and I had been trying to express love to each other and we were doing it all wrong. I was not speaking his love language and he was DEFINITELY not speaking mine. I don’t feel ..read more

Not Hurting Anyone? “Boys will be boys.” That’s the common response when someone – usually a male – has been caught looking at pornography. Every man does it, right? There’s no harm in it, right? But what happens when your use of pornography begins to spiral out of control? What happens when a boy grows up, becomes a man, and pornography begins to impact his marriage? When do you know if you should be concerned with your own use of pornography? When should you seek the help of an experienced professional in order to get over the habitual use of pornography? Ultimately, how do you know if ..read more