Why I wrote a book about my postpartum depression
Postpartum Happiness
by Marissa
2y ago
When my daughter was born, I found myself hating being a mom. The experience was not at all what I expected, and I felt so lost and alone.  I wish there had been something written about this topic when I was stuck in shame and embarrassment for feeling this way. I read various books and articles on postpartum depression, but still felt misunderstood. I decided I needed to write a narration of my journey as a new mother giving voice to a topic that is very taboo: I love my child, but I do NOT love the job of being a parent. This, more than anything was why I was depressed and it’s not tal ..read more
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I never thought I would be grieving (my old life) after having a baby
Postpartum Happiness
by Marissa
2y ago
Everything I had observed before having a baby (movies, TV shows, commercials, my own mother) convinced me I would be happy after having a baby.  Sure I expected to be exhausted, but nevertheless, happy.  I knew my life would change, but I just figured I would love being a mother and therefore wouldn’t miss my old life.   I couldn’t have predicted just how much I would look back and grieve my old life. I yearned for the freedom I had to wake up on a Saturday morning after sleeping in a bit, sipping a hot cup of coffee and enjoying a quiet morning while my husband usually slept ..read more
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Postpartum Happiness
by Marissa
2y ago
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Don’t guilt-trip yourself
Postpartum Happiness
by Marissa
2y ago
The list of messages and questions we receive as parents from well-meaning friends and family is pretty long.  ·        Breast is best ·        Motherhood is the best time of your life  ·        Enjoy this time now because it goes by so fast ·        Are they reaching their milestones?  ·        When are you having another baby? For a new mother this can be very overwhelming. This can often lead to selling ..read more
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Seeking control + new baby = A harsh dose of reality
Postpartum Happiness
by Marissa
2y ago
I so badly wanted to have a natural birth (per my well written birth plan) followed by a blissful postpartum experience. It never occurred to me that this wouldn’t happen because I had approached pregnancy and motherhood like any other aspect of my life.  I didn’t realize this at the time, but my past successes and achievements, thriving on always finding a way to be on top of my game, would work against me. There was a false sense of control that just because I had wanted it and prepared for it (natural child birth, successful breastfeeding, bonding time with baby, soothing the baby eas ..read more
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Why do we compare so much as mothers?
Postpartum Happiness
by Marissa
2y ago
There is no such thing as “normal,” but there is such a thing as social norms. We all want to fit in with the tribe and the only way to know where we fit or if we fit in at all is to compare ourselves to others we interpret as being in the same category; mothers of similar age, mothers of the same religion, mothers who work or stay at home, my own mommy friends, and maybe even the random mothers on social media. These comparisons may be subconscious until some form of internal conflict arises.    I see it time and time again as a postpartum therapist. Inadequacy emerges because of s ..read more
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The healing power of hearing “me too”
Postpartum Happiness
by Marissa
2y ago
Most women are familiar at this point with the powerful #MeToo movement in Hollywood. Though my “me too” is about postpartum depression or a mother daring to tell the truth about her lack of enjoyment with motherhood, I am promoting the same notion that hearing or saying “me too” can be incredibly empowering and healing.  I am that mother daring to say I did not love being a mother. My lack of enjoyment for motherhood showed up as postpartum depression. I strongly believe to some extent my depression could have been prevented had I been able to connect with other mothers who felt like I d ..read more
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Thank you Adele for your honesty
Postpartum Happiness
by Marissa
2y ago
Thank you Adele for your continued honesty about your struggles being a mother. The headline may read Adele praises Beyoncé, but I want to praise Adele for something a little different; helping other mothers to not feel so alone by sharing her struggle so publicly.  ..read more
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Documentary about Maternal Mental Health
Postpartum Happiness
by Marissa
2y ago
I just attended a local viewing in Orange County of this documentary on Perinatal Mood Disorders; which includes postpartum depression and anxiety, for professionals in my Community. The documentary explores the lack of maternal mental health awareness and resources for moms and the consequences this is having. As a therapist specializing in postpartum adjustment, local events such as these make me happy that awareness is spreading and efforts are being made. This film is available to rent or buy on itunes and Amazon ..read more
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“I’m fine!” How I lied my way through postpartum depression
Postpartum Happiness
by Marissa
2y ago
http://blogs.babycenter.com/mom_stories/03092016-i-was-a-liar-when-it-came-to-postpartum-depression/ I can relate to this article so much. Did anyone else lie about their postpartum depression or anxiety during their postnatal OB visit? I am wanting to offer tips for OB's and Pediatricians on how to better detect a perinatal mood disorder. Would this have helped you? Don’t be deceived by looks – symptoms of depression and anxiety may be camouflaged by flawless appearances. Be sure to go beyond just looking at the results of the postpartum self- assessment and take the time to talk about it d ..read more
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