Dr. Eric FitzMedrud
202 FOLLOWERS
A therapist specializing in relationships and sex reflects on relationships, sex, emotions, and personal development
Dr. Eric FitzMedrud
5M ago
Does Mental Health Diagnosis Free You or Stigmatize You?
I’m in a video therapy session with a new client, Emma. She’s crying. I’ve just shared the mental health diagnosis and treatment plan I wrote for her. It is hitting her hard. Did labeling her mental health contribute to stigma? Or does diagnosis help reduce suffering? To answer these questions, context is important. I don’t give my clients a mental health diagnosis until the fourth session.
How I Get to a Mental Health Diagnosis
In the first session with Emma, I heard the problems that brought her into therapy. Then, I offered supportive ..read more
Dr. Eric FitzMedrud
2y ago
Couples Coping with COVID-19
“I can’t believe we’ve only been quarantined for two days and I already can’t stand being with my partner.”
“I’m glad that we’re together, but we’ve been so distant for so long that I’m not sure what this is going to be like.”
“Either being quarantined together is going to bring us together or finally break us apart.”
Extreme circumstances try a relationship—it’s normal. With little notice, you’ve been thrust together for at least the next few weeks. The external circumstance is uncertain and many of the things that make being a couple challenging are likely to com ..read more
Dr. Eric FitzMedrud
2y ago
Why He Watches Porn Instead of Having Sex
This is my fifth in my How Sexuality Works series. Prior entries can be found at links below:
Sexuality Is a River
What is Erotic and Why? Part I
What is Erotic and Why? Part II
Are We Sexually Compatible
Nature is efficient. Water flows in the direction of least resistance. Organisms of all kinds will adapt to their environment to conserve energy. This shows up in the sex and mating of animal species like larger testicles and more sperm when there is more sexual competition among a species but small testicles and less sperm when there is less sexual ..read more
Dr. Eric FitzMedrud
2y ago
This blog entry returns to my How Sexuality Works series which uses the metaphor of a river to help explain sexuality and eroticism. For prior posts in the series click the links below or skip below to read about sexual compatibility.
Sexuality Is a River
What is Erotic and Why? Part I
What is Erotic and Why? Part II
Are We Sexually Compatible?
At the beginning of a relationship the question of sexual compatibility is an exciting one to explore as anticipation mingles with the newness of the relationship. You wonder if this new person could fulfill all of your wildest fantasies. In a long-te ..read more
Dr. Eric FitzMedrud
2y ago
How Long Should I Stay?
“How long should I stay?” is a question that I get sometimes in individual therapy clients and a little less frequently in couple therapy too. As a therapist, I can’t answer for the client but I do have ways of helping my clients answer the question for themselves.
This discernment tool is not designed for people who are in a relationship where there is domestic violence. When there is domestic violence deciding to when to leave includes how to leave as safely as possible. For those in my area looking for help with leaving a relationship with domestic violence I highly ..read more
Dr. Eric FitzMedrud
2y ago
Professional Achievements Publications
Wall, K., Nye, F., & FitzMedrud, E. (2013). Psychospiritual integrative practices. In G. Hartelius & H. Friedman (Eds.) The Handbook of Transpersonal Psychology. Malden, MA: Wiley-Blackwell.
Wall, K. Warner, A. & FitzMedrud, E. & Meritt, K.(2015) Self-compassion in psychotherapy: A psycho-spiritual integrative therapy approach. In T. G. Plante (Ed.), The Psychology of Compassion and Cruelty: Understanding the Emotional, Spiritual, and Religious Influences. Santa Barbara, CA: Praeger.
Presentations
FitzMedrud, E., & Randall, A ..read more
Dr. Eric FitzMedrud
2y ago
8 Ways Couples Avoid Holiday Arguments
Every holiday all over social media I see snarky posts about the yearly tradition of arguing during the holidays. Maybe it is no surprise then that right after New Year’s Day couples therapist offices like mine are flooded with new clients seeking help for issues that came up over the holidays. This year, I thought I’d offer an ounce of prevention and put it out when you might be needing it most.
1. Spend Time With Each Other First
My little secret for Thanksgiving bliss is that I don’t work past 12pm on the Wednesday before Thanksgiving Thursday. This al ..read more
Dr. Eric FitzMedrud
2y ago
How Sexuality Works: Part III
This is the third post of my Sexuality is a River series and my second post applying the analogy of a river to Morin’s theories of eroticism. You can find the first post in the series here: Sexuality Is a River. That post describes the perspective I write from and some caveats about what this analogy does and does not apply to.
What is Erotic and Why Section II
What is Erotic and Why? Part I sets up Morin’s theory of eroticism which provides context for the final three Cornerstones of Eroticism which you will find below. If you want to just keep reading ..read more
Dr. Eric FitzMedrud
2y ago
How Sexuality Works, Part II
This is the second blog post in my series describing what I understand about the subjective experience of sexuality using the analogy of a river. You can find my first post in the series here: Sexuality Is a River. That post describes the perspective I write from and some caveats about what this analogy does and does not apply to.
What is Erotic and Why? Section I
Let’s imagine a river starting in the mountains. As it begins to gather volume from tributaries and more rainfall, it picks a path downward based on a very simple principle, it follows the lowest ground ..read more
Dr. Eric FitzMedrud
2y ago
How Sexuality Works, Part 1: Sexuality is a River
“They should teach this in schools.”
This is a phrase that I hear repeatedly as a therapist. Most often this phrase comes after I have explained a principle of relationships or sexuality. It is one of the reasons that sex therapists use the PLISSIT model for therapy (which stands for Permission giving, Limited Information, Specific Suggestions, and Intensive Therapy). The PLISSIT model includes giving people information about their sexuality because that alone may be enough to resolve the problems. Even when people get accurate, value neutral i ..read more