Barcelona may have lost the tie last night, but have they won the war to become the Champions League’s next banter club? Today, Marcus, Jim, Andy and Vish are here to review a night of Champos action that at times resembled a drunken brawl - and they bloody enjoyed it! You know what they also bloody enjoyed? Portsmouth returning to the Championship! And they created the perfect conditions for a pitch invasion... Plus, Andy compares Mauricio Pochettino to Tim Sherwood, Jim starts an unexpected campaign to unite the people of London, and the lads outline the ONLY circumstance in which Arsenal ..read more

Marcus, Andy and Pete text an anonymous burner phone and get a fresh batch of listener questions delivered to the studio - and there are some crackers! We wonder if a Premier League game could - and should - be played overseas after FIFA’s change of tune this week. Also, should professional fouls be dealt with more harshly? And which animal would cause maximum chaos if released onto a football pitch? Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com. Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just ..read more

Was last night Jürgen Klopp's final European game at Anfield? If so it didn't end well. Today, Marcus, Andy and Pete are here to remind Klopp that going out of the Europa League would at least mean he is on the beach a week earlier... Elsewhere, Pete expresses his jealousy towards John McGinn’s large bum and, in an unrelated turn of events, he and Andy explain how they are coping with their midlife crises. Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com. Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for ..read more

How about that football, eh? Last night’s Champions League action was so good that Andy has decided he needs to get a second big telly to watch all the barns burn at once. Marcus, Jim, Vish and Andy reflect on Arsenal showing glimpses of their ITV era last night and marvel at the quality of goals on display in Madrid. Plus, Andy explains why Sporting manager Rúben Amorim would be a good fit for Liverpool. Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com. Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for ..read more

Did you know that if you’re a Tottenham player you can punch a Nottingham Forest player on a Sunday afternoon without punishment? Today Marcus, Luke and Jim applaud James Maddison’s knowledge and application of that rule this weekend. Elsewhere, Luke compares Man United vs Liverpool to Pulp Fiction and Jim dismisses James Ward-Prowse scoring from a corner because it was “wind-assisted”. Plus, the Ramblers officially declare the business end of the season OPEN! Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com. Sign ..read more

Marcus, Luke and Jim are back in Correspondence Corner tackling some more of your cracking questions! We start with an interesting one: in the age of mass media coverage and scrabbling for social media clicks, is football punditry becoming more divisive and are club biases paraded around too often?  We also wonder which players or managers missed their chance at a big move, and we pitch some dream football documentaries about past teams and seasons. if anyone fancies making Jack Grealish: Uncovered with us, let us know.  Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and ema ..read more

What… on EARTH was that?! Marcus, Luke and Jim recap Cole Palmer 4-3 Moments FC, where perhaps the biggest takeaway from one of the most ridiculous games you’ll ever see was: you’ve got to feel sorry for Harry Maguire. Elsewhere, Chris Wilder finds himself snookered, Vincent Kompany is forced to manage Burnley’s next crucial game from a blimp and we stumble across one of the most outrageously-named footballers you’ll ever find. Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com. Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 ..read more

Marcus didn’t think he’d ever make this comparison but… Phil Foden went full-blown Wayne Rooney against Aston Villa! It was a stunning hat-trick. But what were Villa doing leaving the serving hatch of their wall wide open for his first goal? Marcus and Jim react to victories for Man City and Arsenal which keep the title race cookin’. Plus, Marcus impersonates Jim’s dad and Steve Bruce reveals he has a tickly bum. Join us! Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com. Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per m ..read more

Marcus, Luke and Jim dive into yet more Barclays action, as a gloriously violent cameo from Newcastle's Paul Dummett gave Everton some much-needed points. Generous, innit. Elsewhere, journalists continue to ask Mad Pep some even madder questions, Morgan Gibbs-White turns into primetime Zinedine Zidane and Liverpool prepare to use their Sheffield United at home voucher. A midweek treat! Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com. Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble ..read more

Marcus, Luke, Vish and Pete return after Man City 0-0 Arsenal to find the barn very much intact. Wasn’t even remotely burned. Pep Guardiola still found plenty to be angry about, of course. Luckily there were plenty of other Barclays bangers to get stuck into, as Man United somehow escaped Brentford with a point, West Ham somehow lost a crazy game at Newcastle, and Chelsea somehow remain the most mid-table club in the division. According to Mauricio Pochettino, anyway - he thinks they should be fourth, you see.  Plus, Pete’s clumsy South Korean adventures and Mark Puppetmaster Clattenbur ..read more