Do y'all have moments where you're doing something, washing dishes for example whatever, and you freeze and realize you're in a body? I usually freeze, look down, look around, freak out a little but then I get preoccupied? I usually don't remember what happens afterwards all that clearly, I assume we finish the task and go about business. We also have moments where if we're laying down and have the, "oh shit meat suit" realization, we feel like we get pushed hard "out" of the body then immediately slammed back in. It makes us dizzy almost. submitted by /u/niiPanda0 [visit reddit] [comments ..read more

For us, we basically have to imagine a computer screen, then imagine the headspace form of the alter who wants to switch in appearing on the screen/ in front of it in a flash of light, then imagine the alter who's switching out appearing in headspace. Co-consciousness works the same way but with two alters instead of one in step 2. It also makes induced switches hard to do whenever we're on a substance that causes closed-eye hallucinations, because it prevents us from visualizing the computer screen. Usually to switch we have to resort to splashing water on our face. submitted by /u/AIMRunni ..read more

It's 6am, I haven't slept, and I kind of had a breakdown at 4am, I kept stretching and punching my face because I hate myself. Then after I tried active imagination, I was skeptical that I would force the conversation with myself and that it wouldn't work, but this ""alter"" instantly took control when I started and I immediately identified him with the breakdown that happened earlier, he said he didn't directly hated myself but he wouldn't care that what he does to satisfy himself (sort of) would cause me harm, and he insisted that he wouldn't let me sleep and annoyed me on purpose. I wrote ..read more

So tell us. Really. How was your day? submitted by /u/Exciting-Volume-4169 [visit reddit] [comments ..read more

Hello, I would like to preface this with the fact i know that fusion isn’t an event and more of a journey and it’s been a journey i’ve been on without realizing for the past couple of years. I’ve been working through my trauma and done some immense healing over the past 3-4 years and even recovered memories which i had no prior knowledge of and worked through them. With that being said I feel as though I have been slowly fusing with an alter and nobody in the system wants to fuse it is simply not our goal. When I say slowly fusing i mean being in the front together and not being able to tell ..read more

Sometimes I feel so ill-equipped for this job like I'm in my 20s, I just wanna go out and do drugs and meet people and there's all these kids who need so much and I'm just like ✌️help. I was telling a friend about recent things that have made the kids scream "I HATE YOU! YOU ARE THE MEANEST EVER." Highlights include not buying them a hot chocolate (the cafe was closed), not playing with them (we were at work), and moving them overseas (no excuse for this one, it's just gotta be done but their grief and confusion is hard to witness). My friend said "it's really cool they feel safe enough to te ..read more

So I don’t really leave the house, generally because I’m scared but also because I don’t want to just black out and do something I won’t remember. However I recently made friends with some new people and I’m not sure how to manage with the conversation I had with my friend who is also my roommate, he mentioned how I had met with someone more than once and I had no recollection of this whatsoever, my friend told me when this happened and I explained what happened before and after. He has since gotten upset about this and told me that we’ve had the conversation of ‘this happened’ and me asking ..read more

Hello, I haven’t talked in the subreddit in a long while, but I thought I’d ask for help. I found out about our DID in July of last year, and my girlfriend was the first person to see us visibly switch. However, I feel ever since then her mental health has taken a downward spiral. She used to laugh and smile around me, and we’d spend so much time together. Now, she tells me that she’d rather be alone and not with me anymore. I’ve been handling a lot. We’re in our final semester of college before getting our AA, we’re going to work, and we’re currently homeless due to leaving our abusive situa ..read more

We switched at least 4 times but managed to get the things checked we needed to make sure the body is safe for the moment. Had a complete meltdown after I had to become present in the body and feel the pain I was blocking in order to keep surviving. I cried for 2 hours. Shootout to the best nurse who got me pain meds and actually seemed to understand what I was going through. He distracted me with my comfort item I brought and helped me stop hyperventilating. Back home now and trying to relax and hopefully sleep. Here's to hoping the system can figure out how to get the follow up care we all ..read more

Is it common for subsystems to be able to communicate directly with other subsystems in the system? So for example, I like to imagine the way of explaining it as the main system is a general train station. And the lower areas are subsystems being a level lower than the main train station (dissociative barriers wise) compared to the main system. Trains from the lower level can travel to other stations on the same level and vice versa. submitted by /u/randompersonignoreme [visit reddit] [comments ..read more