Heather’s story – The Big Day My wedding gave rise to so many emotions, but I was bursting with overwhelming joy when I saw my oldest and dearest friend Freja – someone I’ve only seen once in 40 years ..read more

Initially I became a vegan for health reasons. Then it became a moral issue. Now I do it just to annoy people. That is, according to my fiancé. Robert would easily become a vegetarian if bacon grew on trees. So as you can imagine we are still fighting over the wedding menu. He wants a BBQ. I’m fine with that as long as there is no meat, seafood, poultry or dairy. That’s when he threw down his motorcycle helmet and yelled: “we didn’t fight our way up the food chain to eat lentil burgers!” But I’ve seen Robert with a pair of BBQ tongs. He doesn’t have a BBQ – it’s a cremation! “How do you like y ..read more

Britney Spears annulled her marriage to Jason Alexander after only 55 hours of wedded bliss. Well dear reader, I may be about to smash that record. You see, it all came about when I asked Robert to book the band for our reception. I distinctly asked for a panpipe group from the Andes as guests arrive, then later, the fabulous a Cafe of the Gate of Salvation . Robert said “YES!!!.” But in his defence, this was exclaimed while watching his underdog team win the grand final ..read more

My Big Fat Geek Wedding 2 So, I’m losing a few kilos for the wedding. (Yes, even vegans need to watch what they eat sometimes. Do you know how fattening carob can be?) This is for two reasons – I want to fit into my wedding dress, and also because I’m broadcasting the ceremony live over the internet ..read more

If there’s one thing Robert hates more than a vegan dinner, it’s Celine Dion. In fact, she sits marginally below his hate for Volvos and John Denver – not necessarily in that order. So we’ve been at loggerheads this week over our bridal entrance song ..read more

Robert says if he hears those words one more time he’ll bang his head against the wall while tossing a bouquet of spanners over his shoulder. He argues that in a world of high-speed Internet, fibre-optics, texting, Facebook, Instagram and Skype, the only people who send anything by snail-mail these days are banks and divorce lawyers ..read more

Robert and I attended a dear friend’s wedding last weekend. Even though it didn't toast my bagel it turned out to be a good opportunity for gleaning wedding ideas. You see I wasn’t crazy about the use of leather placemats at the dining tables (being a vegan…hellooo) but I adored imaginative touches with the heart-shaped pink ice cubes in the table water. Robert was underwhelmed with the beer selection but talked effusively about the rissoles all the way home. Even texted the groom about them ..read more

A lot can happen in three seconds: twelve babies are born, an area of rain forest the size of a football field falls to human development, one person dies of starvation in the Third World and Bill Gates earns $750 US. And three seconds for me to make up my mind about Camilla (my fiancé Robert’s Ex). Robert and I bumped into her at an overpriced restaurant last month, where I still have a glass of wine on lay-by ..read more

Wedding Countdown – Day 32 I’m sitting here curled up on the lounge with Mr Biggles (my tabby), sipping a delicious chai latte as a gaudy Venetian glass sculpture of a rooster stares at me from across the room. It’s eyeballing me. I’m eyeballing him. Mr Biggles is uneasy, sniffing at it and jumping back as if stung by a wasp ..read more

Hi Gang. I am creating this so I can share my thoughts with you in order to avoid an impending nervous breakdown. As you may or may not know - and if you don’t well get ready, this is my impending (second) marriage (cue Pink Floyd: “A Momentary Lapse of Reason ..read more