It has been some time since I have written. I am not quite sure why I stopped. Perhaps because I did not feel safe. The last two years have been tough, not only for me, but for our world as we have faced an ongoing pandemic. Covid-19 has pushed each of us to the edge. We have been subjected to mandates, restrictions, illness and death. Our lives have been limited. Travel has been restricted and our sense of freedom has been compromised. It has been tough. I get it. As a Trauma Coach I see the stress in my clients. They are unable to have the human contact they used to have. Many feel isolated ..read more

You may have noticed that I have been on a bit of a hiatus with my writing and for that, I apologize. Not just to any of my followers but also to myself. Writing has always been my outlet. I feel so much healthier after I write.  Life has not been idle though. I have been busy. I am now a Certified Life Coach under the name Rhodes to Wellness Coaching (check out my FB page here  )  and soon I will be furthering my coaching skills and learning the Equine Gestalt Coaching Method. I will be able to offer more healing to my clients with the horse as my partner.  It ha ..read more

  There are many symptoms that come with having PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder); lack of focus, hypervigilance, heightened startle response, avoidance of anything connected to the event and night terrors to name a few. My biggest battle has been the night terrors. I battled night terrors for seven years straight following the end of my abusive marriage. They were not every night, but they were usually a few times a week. I would wake in a cold sweat and feel completely disoriented and scared.   In my night terror I would have been fighting something or experiencing somethi ..read more

Words. We use them every day. It is how we talk about our day, say what we want, or write that letter to Aunt Mary. Words are everywhere. From the time we are a baby we are learning how to communicate to those around us by making words. Some words we love to hear like, “I love you” or “You got a promotion!”. Many words when we put together make us feel happy and loved, but what about those words that hurt us? Words like  “asshole, bitch, loser or idiot.” What about those words? In my first marriage my husbands “pet name” for me was idiot. I was called this name on a daily basis. As the ab ..read more

It’s terrible when it grips you. Anxiety, is a monster all in it’s own. Your head spins, your body shakes and you are overcome by fear of the unknown. It sucks. According to Statistics Canada  approximately 2.8 million people, or 10.1% of Canadians aged 15 and older, reported symptoms consistent with at least one of six mental or substance use disorders in the past 12 months. The six disorders measured by the survey were major depressive episode, bipolar disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, and abuse of or dependence on alcohol, cannabis or other drug ..read more

Have you ever had someone say something hurtful or offensive and then the next moment laugh and say, “just kidding” or “I meant to be funny” or “just jokes”? Has that moment left you feeling confused as to whether it is OK to be upset about what they said? If you have been there then let me tell you that you have experienced a form of emotional abuse. How do you know when that “harmless” joke was not funny at all and is in fact emotional abuse? You know by how it makes you feel. If the “joke” hurts you or insults you in some way then you have experienced emotional abuse. Often the person telli ..read more

I believe that every child is a gift. I especially agree with my own three children. They have been an amazing blessing in my life and I am so proud to be their mum. Nothing in life really prepares you to be a parent. Sure when you are pregnant you can read all of the parenting help books or talk to health nurses, but really you are never quite prepared when that little baby is placed in your arms. Suddenly you realize that no one, but you is responsible for this living and breathing little person. It’s life depends on you. Wow what a profound moment that was for me. As a parent I have always ..read more

Depression. It sucks. According to the World Health Organization (WHO) 350 million people worldwide battle depression. I am one of them. I was first diagnosed with Clinical Depression back in the mid 90’s due to grief. My mother had been killed in a  car accident almost 10 years earlier and I had fallen into a deep depression. This had led to me feeling suicidal, but thankfully I found good support systems; a psychotherapist and a psychiatrist to get me through it all. I stayed on antidepressants for about five years and then, once I was feeling stable I weaned myself off the medication ..read more

  There are many symptoms that come with having PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder); lack of focus, hypervigilance, heightened startle response, avoidance of anything connected to the event and night terrors to name a few. My biggest battle has been the night terrors. I battled night terrors for seven years straight following the end of my abusive marriage. They were not every night, but they were usually a few times a week. I would wake in a cold sweat and feel completely disoriented and scared.   In my night terror I would have been fighting something or experiencing somethi ..read more

  It is January 2019 and nine years ago this month my ex husband started to rape me. I have written about these assaults before , but as I am reaching the nine year anniversary of a most terrible time in my life, I found myself to be reflective and asking myself, how am I doing now?   Perhaps I should start by saying that my ex husband was very abusive. We were together for 15 years and over that time he subjected me to verbal, emotional, financial, physical and sexual abuse. Not only to me, but also to our three children. The abuse was slow and insidious at first, which is what most ..read more