Publicly, some Cheaters may present the divorce story as if it was always a mutual decision based on unfortunate circumstances. They HATE when an uppity faithful spouse spills the beans, though, about their cheating. That is NOT what they want others knowing. The last thing they want is accountability or consequences for their cheating. Now, … The post As if it was always a mutual decision! appeared first on Divorce Minister ..read more

Cheater apologists are quick to point at the flaws in the marriage and blame the faithful spouse “for their part.” This is foolishness parading as wisdom. Sometimes metaphors help us understand how foolish some things actually are: The marriage is a house. This house has needed updates. For example, it needs new windows, a fresh … The post Bigger than just “squeaky floors” appeared first on Divorce Minister ..read more

“How did you get that information?” asks Cheater. A Cheater who responds this way is a Cheater still committed to her sins. She is not repentant. This is a question about how she got exposed. It is about Cheater damage control. There’s a leak! The problem isn’t her behavior. For her, the problem is you knowing about … The post How did you get that information? appeared first on Divorce Minister ..read more

Faithful Spouse: Who is he then? Cheater: A friend. Can’t I have friends? This is a common cheater ploy. They attempt to minimize the nature of their relationship with the affair partner. He (or she) is presented as “a friend.” Then they might go on the offensive accusing the faithful spouse of attempting to cut … The post Cheater-Speak: “He’s a friend.” appeared first on Divorce Minister ..read more

  If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land. -2 Chronicles 7:15, KJV (emphasis mine) God does not peddle in cheap grace. He … The post Turning from “wicked ways” is a godly precondition appeared first on Divorce Minister ..read more

“This is the way of an adulterous woman:     She eats and wipes her mouth     and says, ‘I’ve done nothing wrong.’” -Proverbs 30:20, NIV The “Not a Problem” Problem Some cheaters are so far gone that they genuinely see no problem in cheating. They have believed the lies “justifying” their wicked sins. This is a problem. … The post Not seeing the problem is a problem! appeared first on Divorce Minister ..read more

An emotional affair? How can you tell? When does it cross the line? Cheaters are infamous for admitting to an emotional affair before or instead of a physical affair. Because pastors and others are poor at holding them accountable for their own actions, this opens the door for them to blame–essentially–the faithful spouse for such … The post Emotional Affair? When does it cross the line? appeared first on Divorce Minister ..read more

The Lord said, “What have you done? Listen! Your brother’s blood cries out to me from the ground.” -Genesis 4:10, NIV From the beginning, God has cared about the victimized. He cares about justice as He is just! A real struggle in marriage infidelity situations is being seen and not blamed. The injustice of the situation … The post Injustice cries out to God! appeared first on Divorce Minister ..read more

Telling lies about others is as harmful as hitting them with an ax, wounding them with a sword, or shooting them with a sharp arrow. -Proverbs 25:18, NLT While Cheaters have no problem cheating, they DO have a problem with people KNOWING they are cheating! They will go through all sorts of lengths to throw … The post Wicked Cheater Propaganda appeared first on Divorce Minister ..read more

“I felt like a used piece of tissue paper. Just thrown away in the trash.”  – Vineyard pastor The quote might not be exact. However, I will never forget the thrust of what she said. The message was unmistakable. This brave pastoral spouse shared to a young Vineyard Church about her experience of being sexually … The post Feeling like used, discarded tissue appeared first on Divorce Minister ..read more