Blackthorn is at her most blousy right now. This unassuming shrub-sized tree (never higher that 13ft, according to legend) is erupting in powder puffs of white blossom. Look for her along hedgerow edges, a harbinger of spring, the first note of the blossom before the full orchestra of orchard trees blooms reach their crescendo in May. Not pinky-tinged like her cousin the Hawthorn, Blackthorn has ‘blue white’ flowers, brilliant white petals and red stamens. I find their delicacy surprisingly opposite to her name and long association with witches, violence and cold.  Tonight I am running a ..read more

There is no parenting manual, and certainly not one that would suit each of us and each of our children we are gifted. Usually when I see ‘parenting course’ I grimace and bolt.  So forgive me for sharing the advice that I lean on, mostly overheard from people in extremis, all of whom have lived it. Parenting cracks you right open. Your heart is no longer inside you but a living being outside of yourself. When we talk of getting in your flow, parenting is the opposite of that. Other beings needs interrupt it, always. It is an ongoing act of adaptation and surrender. Here are my ‘ABCs’, thr ..read more

Exams I sat my Sanskrit GCSE last week. After shouting at my son over some minor breakfast/shoes/school run excitation, I apologised and told him I had an exam. ‘That must be very stressful’, he said, full of compassion and understanding. It is. And I know this as a meditator and meditation teacher. And yet, in that moment,  the excess of demand flipped my insides into a stress reaction mode. We all this, whenever we experience an internal response that is either: fight, flight, freeze, flop. When we shut down, hide ourselves in work/Netflix/ice-cream/booze, or shout at our loved ones, or ..read more

Forget Valentines Day - Saturday 18 February is MahaShivaratri - the great night of Shiva. In fact it is his wedding night. Shiva is the embodiment, personality or force of nature which brings change get by removing irrelevance.  His presence is signalled by wind, but also by many stories involving elephants, tigers, snakes and a host of lesser demons that he vanquishes for the god of humanity, and natural balance. Like many Vedic deities, he has 1008 names, and myriad stories. Best known as blue throat for the time he swallowed poison that was set to destroy - well, everything. His abili ..read more

Self care isn’t selfish. You need some ‘me’ time. Give yourself the oxygen first, before you help others. As a mum, and overloaded teacher, I know these truisms, and probably even say them to others. In fact I think I used them in my last newsletter, encouraging people to come on retreat to restore and refresh. It’s not that I don’t believe that rest is important, but there is a flaw in the phrasing. Self care and ‘me’ time both suggest that there must be a kind of care or a time that is possible to be disconnected from our self. And that we work in a dichotomy of me and you, separate, divided ..read more

I have spent my fair share of Christmases in tears. Some years I would wake up and blub, other times I could sneak it in at the end of the heart-twanging Christmas movie. One year I was so proud I had made it through breakfast, church and lunch - until the kids began singing Christmas carols after the Queen’s Speech. It turns out, that a ‘Silent Night’ by an East London Chidren’’s choir is my kryptonite. Maybe tears aren’t/weren’t your style - perhaps on holiday you get sick? Or find yourself picking an argument with a loved one (even if it IS entirely THEIR fault)? Or do you experience worse ..read more

My garden thrives through my mistakes and my (benign) neglect. The front porch, past which I walk EVERY day, has plenty of pots on it, that I forget to water. I no longer berate myself for these apparent failures. A few years ago, before lockdown, a cousin moved house and brought me a lovely strawberry pot, the wide pear shaped kind with lots of scooped holes out of which individual strawberry plants can grow, flower and fruit.  I was teaching full time (see how I am already blaming other circumstances!) and failed to water it enough. Strawberry plants send out runners – even when not str ..read more

  “We should not be ashemaed of anger. T’s very good and a very powerful thing. What we need to be ashamed of is the way we abuse it” Does the Dalai Llama get angry? hear his answer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eSEIqAy2T1U ..read more

1)    ”It’s about focus and concentration.” Do you remember “Do – or do not. There is no try” from Yoda? This was written by George Lucas, a meditator who used the technique I teach. We don’t try to meditate – this practice is the opposite of the ‘strain/pain for gain’ mentality. It is surprising to me as a teacher how hard it can be for adults to let go of “effort=outcome”. Kids are better at this, and this is why is a quicker process for them to learn! When we learn a mantra based meditation, we have a tool AND a process to make our settling into deeper layers of awareness, ea ..read more

I went to church as a child. It was part of the rhythm of the week. We would get dressed up; rushed to get there just (about) on time, and then time passed sitting and singing until it was done (or Sunday School, which ever came first). As a teen, bored in boarding school, our chaplain hosted communion on a Wednesday night. It was a reason to be out of the boarding house. I remember liking the quiet. and the nice wooden altar. My clearest memories of our first church (in Montreal, Canada) mostly hinge around the seasonal bazaars - selling angels made out of pine cones and making many, many, re ..read more