The facts. In March, when my 18 month maternity leave ends, I will no longer be a working registered nurse. I will not be welcome back to my place of work. I will not be putting on scrubs again, double checking my bag for key badge and stethoscope, and mentally preparing myself for the day or night shift. I will not work a Christmas Day again, or be stuck mid transport on New Year’s Eve. I will not feel the busyness of a morning shift, glueing ecg strips in charts, and making my rounds to see all my new patients. I will not feel the eery quiet of a night shift as I wait for the soon to arrive ..read more

Baby boy, we have had quite the month between month ten and eleven. In that one month alone you have managed to get your first cold which you handled like a champ. Mom and dad were pretty sick too and with so little energy, we may have caved and let you watch Winnie the Pooh. You had no interest. It did not entertain you. Music did a much better job distracting you. You also had a fever for 5 days which worried me but it was never very high and it certainly didn’t stop you from moving around. Speaking of moving, you have learned how to stand on your own without support. You tend to be a little ..read more

I kissed you goodnight and then it hit me. I had kissed you goodnight for the last time as my baby. Tomorrow morning you will enter the world of toddlerhood. New challenges are coming, new adventures are on the horizon, but for a few more hours, you are my sleeping baby. This past year has changed me in ways I cannot adequately put into words. It may be your first birthday, but it was also the birth of a new mom 12 months ago. A women terrified of all the changes that were headed her way, and yet a women so in love with this new little one snuggled on her chest. Fear has been a constant compan ..read more

My dear sweet Evan Jude. It has been 4 months since I have reflected on your time with us so far and my oh my how things have changed. Let’s talk sleep. Sleep became worse and worse as you hit 6 months. You were up almost every hour at night needing to be fed. Is as tired. You didn’t nap. You became a cranky and irritable baby. I was at my wits end. I was not the mom I needed to be for you thanks to the exhaustion I felt so your dad and I decided, after much prayer and consideration to do sleep training. It was the most gentle version I could find and it nearly broke my heart. I cut the night ..read more

Evan, you are almost 6 months old. How time is flying by. Your dad and I fall more in love with you every day. We are now those annoyingly proud parents who think everything you do is cute and amazing. We have laughed and cried and prayed more in these past 6 months than you’d even think possible. Oh how we love you and how you fill our lives with such joy. You came into our lives in the most perfect timing, ordained by God. Evan, a little about you and your life so far. You are so bright and smiley. You give us the sweetest smiles that make up for the nights you don’t go to bed well, or the ..read more