Text conversation is how you convert a match to a date. There are articles around discussing techniques like push-pull, negs and displaying value. I like to go for flirty, teasing and interesting. I think it’s the grown up way and the way that you will feel most natural with. One of the first articles I wrote for this blog was titled Negs are awful, flirt instead. I don’t like the concept that negging involves trying to lower a girl’s self esteem, so here Is an article where I will show how I do it, including actual example conversations from my Tinder account. Whether you prefer the phrases ..read more

The answer is a resounding yes! Well, I think so anyway. I’ll tell you my story and you can be the judge. I’m Phil and I’m 38. I separated from my wife 3 years ago and I have two awesome kids with her. I’m currently dating a girl who I met on Tinder, she also has kids and I’m really enjoying dating her. My ex-wife and I had been on a rocky road for some time. I’d come to the conclusion that she didn’t care for me (I later realised she quite probably fell in the category of coercive and controlling) but tried to stay with her for the kids. Eventually we both realised this wasn’t going to work ..read more

That match fizzled out again. You can’t even count the number of times it’s happened. The conversation was just dull frustration then ground to a complete halt. But you protected yourself this time, kept your guard up. You knew, even before you sent the first message, that it would be just another one of those matches. They briefly got your hopes up, but then nothing. Oh well, plenty of fish in the sea. On to the next one – hopefully they’ll be more fun. Otherwise maybe you’ll just delete the app. Whoa, whoa, whoa! Is this the kind of blog where we wallow in self pity? Of course not ..read more

Tinder bios are hard for guys to write and Tinder bio advice can be contradictory. In a bio you want to seem fun, interesting and like you’ve got your life in order. Give her something that excites, sparks the imagination and makes her interested to find out more. And yet, there are so many ways to do this badly. It’s a real minefield and I’ve already written a post showing 20 mistakes to avoid in a bio. You have to walk a line somewhere between boring and wanker, without ending up as either. There are so many fads in bios that have just come and gone, and I think using any of them makes you ..read more

Before you read this post, go have a look at Tinder Translator on Instagram, then come back. Done that? No, I mean it, go look now. I hope you have seen how not to do it and had a good chuckle. It turns out there are many, many ways to not do it. Something that, in your head sounds cool, or flirty, or funny, or exciting can easily be read as  masochistic, posey, arrogant, creepy or insecure. Here are some things to not do in your bio I’ll put this first, because it’s the most common one, maybe the most important one, but the one girls mention least. Don’t list all your flaws ..read more

The winner is – your main profile photo, then your main profile picture and your main profile snap. Yes, it’s so important I said it three times. Your Tinder profile main profile picture is that important. You may think I’m joking, but I’m not. Your first picture is the most important thing on your dating app profile by such a long way, that the rest almost doesn’t matter. If you have this wrong, then everything else is pretty much irrelevant because almost everyone will have swiped no before they see anything else. I’m going to do a specific post about nailing a good main photo, but the main ..read more

I think most people have heard of “negs”. Negs and negging were phrases used by Neil Straus in his book, The Game. if you haven’t read the book, then it is a semi biographical description of how Neil got involved in pickup artist society. He describes pickup skills as “game”. A friend of mine once said to me – isn’t negging saying something like, “you’re pretty hot… for a fat girl”. This seems like a pretty awful thing to say to someone in my opinion. In The Game, negs are introduced by a character called Mystery as: Neither a compliment nor insult, a neg is something in between – an acciden ..read more

Do you ever find yourself wanting to send a message to someone, in a fit of rage, because they ghosted you or cancelled a date at the last minute. Well, DON’T! Here’s the deal, women are allowed to ditch you. It is their prerogative. So many women I’ve talked to have horror stories about guys who went nuts at them when they didn’t want to meet up or didn’t want a second date. Just because a girl says that a date was nice, even if they say they want to meet again, does not make you entitled to a second one, nor anything else. Some girls are on tinder and want to chat with guys and not go on da ..read more