To Josh: Damn babe…we really gonna go down like this? We know what is going to happen to you. I just hope it is on our terms. Either way it is our separate paths now. You know now I stand with you and am solid with you any day, time or hour. But to you only time will prove what I say. I realize that but know that Not every woman is equal to the past. I had to grip that myself with how Robert stripped me of all… including my self esteem. Do you worry about what will happen to me? Alone against the world again. Yeah I learned to be a bad ass bitch before you ever shook my world….upside down an ..read more

This video depicts the character I used to write this fictional tale. You can see his nasty clothes and how he shuffles like an old man. His shirt is on backwards. Such a sorry man. The lines between truth and fiction blur so often it can be hard to distinguish…but John is an actual man I know. When he sees me he shuffles in a little dance with me. I usually bring him food and water. His little dance between us reminds me he is still there and needing interaction and to know he is lived and cared or even now. I often wonder where he stays….he just seems to aimlessly wander in and out of life ..read more

I am wondering if this is a good idea or not…I sometimes make poor decisions even without any drugs or alcohol. Does this not look like fun? Or should I wait til darkness and then hop in for a quick dip? Yeah…it’s a plan…I will send pics if I can ..read more

Josh and I had plans but he spun out with this guy we both like! He said half an hour but that was an hour ago. I don’t know why I let my heart be tormented by him. I am going to take a dip in the pond that sits off the interstate as you enter town.. I may just soak my sore, hot, swollen feet to begin…but I am realizing Josh likely is doing his own thing. I am heading to his spot. I plan on packing what things I have left. That way if his whore comes tonight it wont even be an issue. He obviously wants her there. She has a nasty ass he’d she lives in but she intrudes and he welcomes her ..at l ..read more

Today Josh did me wrong so many different ways, but the final blopp was a whale joke as he walked off. Well all I can say is fuck you, JOSH. You tell me my attitude makes me ugly…damn straight. I have gotten were you ripped my heart out more than stupid ass Robert…my fucking X. Yeah you tore my heart out….. And I let you. Let me bleed…mainly on paper but what the fuck. Does anyone care? Fucking rhetorical question. Don’t botheranswerinf, bitch. I know who loves me andwho don’t. I have NO FAMILY. I ain’t attendingany of you funerals. Those mf left me here to die. This is to Robin…..i hope your ..read more

Hello y’all I would like to share on some of my fucked up life tonight. Yeah it usually makes for a good read. So tonight Josh and I bathed at the campsite and got ready for bed. I showed him the place but I consider it his spot until he leaves. Especially since he ditched me for a street whore named Crazy Kelly. So he left with here and just recently returned and once again won me back…because my heart is a damn dumbass. Lol We were relaxing when the whore he left me for and her best guy friend crashed our tent……fucking Josh seems to think that’s ok. He welcomed them in and now the whore slee ..read more

The first time I saw the homeless wanderer in person, he was verbally attacking imaginary demons ..something about an evil midget and four keys. He was so disheveled he pushed away the food and water I bought and raced off back into the woods behind downtown convenience store in a rough part of town. His clothes looked sodden with puke, shit and blood. He appeared in just one set of clothes every time he caught my eye….and the clothes were so dirty and dingy they could never have come clean. He had wiry whiskered face splashed with dried mud and blood. On his neck was a bizarre tattoo of a thr ..read more

Well here I sit outside his tent….Joshua’s tent that is. The whore and her guy friend are gone. Thank God. Took most of our good food and other shit they could steal without us noticing. I tried talking to Josh this morning about the situation, but I might have well been talking to a fish. An explosive fish…but none the same. So nothing changes…nothing matters. He really doesn’t care how I feel or if I hurt. I wonder why I fall for me like that ..read more

Sometimes I am candid to protect anyone involved…so here it is…the truth. I have been AWOL because my stupid butt went out and fell in love. Please don’t chastise me! I am at a local park. The birds are coming alive. I can hear the traffic from Interstate 45 rumbling nearby. It is actually illegal to be here in the park at this time. The park is closed. It is also illegal to sleep in public here, but I am planning to anyways. I am drinking a warm beer. I am hoping the man I love comes back here to where we were last. We sat here and shared a set of headphones and listened to music together for ..read more

It is 5:05 am. I am exhausted. I walked so many miles around town to find my friend, Josh. I am heartbroken . My heart is a dumbass….my mind is smart and cunning…not vulnerable, but my heart is a dumbass who only listens to itself…not reason. I am sitting in a local park ..read more