All the things around me seem to be a messy disaster. I just got an email from the high school my son will enter in the fall asking for donations and help fundraising to put a film on the windows to slow bullets. Not baseball uniforms or computers or books, but bullet protection. It’s emotional enough to send a child off to high school, never mind the ever growing worry they may be shot in algebra class. No wonder I have trouble sleeping and experience a low-level of anxiety at all times. No wonder I am hiding in a closet at work so I can privately catch my breath before heading back to my de ..read more

I’ve had a couple challenging weeks. My mental health has been at probably an all-time low and I’ve been failing at several aspects of life. I don’t have the strength to go into detail about it, but suffice it to say, I’m spent. My men are all otherwise occupied this evening so I decided to sit solo on our patio, next to my SoloStove, and enjoy the twilight. Everything was perfect, even the random mix of music. That was until Chris Stapleton singing Tennessee Whiskey gave me a hankering for some bourbon. So I headed to the kitchen to make myself a hot toddy with some Bulleit and an extra squee ..read more

Today is our 19th wedding anniversary. We got hitched just three short days before 9-11-01, launching into wedded bliss as the world changed forever. However, this is not the most interesting thing about our wedding. I extended a wedding invite to George W. and Laura Bush, but they promptly and politely declined. This is just as well, as he may have drank too much beer and been less capable of dealing with the 9-11 aftermath. We forged ahead and were thrilled to have all of our family and friends joining us for our special day. Our wedding took place on my parents’ farm in Grant’s Lick, Kentuc ..read more

Midlife hit me square in the face a few years ago. I had a loving family, great friends, and all of my basic needs were met, yet something was off. Something didn’t feel right. I made progressively more extreme adjustments in search of some sort of peace. I changed my hair, bought a new car, tried a new job (or three), yet nothing was fixing how I felt. I left a full-time position, picked up freelancing, and started this blog. As I continued to examine my life, and even while acknowledging my many blessings, I felt empty and depressed. At the end of last year, I decided it was time to head bac ..read more

Social distancing wears on and I’ve been looking for new ways to entertain myself and my boys. As I was cleaning my bookshelf I came across the box set of my favorite books from 4th grade, Laura Ingalls Wilder’s Little House series. I managed to convince my boys to let me read a couple chapters to them every evening before bed rather than watching another lame YouTube video. They were only slightly convinced this was a good idea, but they played along, mostly because they decided they could take the Accelerated Reader test when we finished and pad their goals for the trimester. Then the first ..read more

A year ago, I decided to launch this blog. I thought it would be an opportunity to flex my writing muscle while working through my midlife challenges. And I’m a little embarrassed to admit that I was seeking attention and positive feedback during a time where my professional confidence had been shaken to its core. I assumed my life would evolve and change as I figured out what mattered most and how to create a life with meaning and purpose. However, I had no clue how drastically the world around me would change and in such a short time. Tonight, I sit in a darkened basement with Jason and my b ..read more

When all this started a month ago, I had a can-do attitude. I was getting things accomplished. I rallied the troops at work while memorizing the CDC website. I lectured my parents and in-laws to get them on board with social distancing. I watched Beshear, DeWine, and Trump. I enthusiastically encouraged my boys about NTI. I planned video calls with friends, family, moms, church groups, etc. I was sleeping about 4-5 hours on a good night, but man, the adrenaline was coursing through my veins, so I was good to go. Over the last week, it’s become more and more apparent that this level of producti ..read more

This afternoon, Andrea Bocelli gave a solo performance from the Duomo cathedral of Milan with a message of love, hope and healing to Italy and the rest of the world. It’s only been 6 hours since the live performance, and 19,000,000 people and counting have already viewed this moving concert from an empty cathedral. I recommend watching this entire concert, but Bocelli stepping onto the steps of the Duomo to sing Amazing Grace is required viewing. If you don’t get goosebumps, you may not have a soul. Grazie, Andra Bocelli, grazie. On Easter Sunday (April 12, 2020), by invitation of the City and ..read more

I went to Kroger this morning for the first time in four weeks. The grocery store used to be my happy place—used to. Today, there was anxiety hanging in the air and my usual leisurely stroll up and down the aisles shifted into a sprint to grab what I needed without coming close to people. And I did all of this with a mask around my face and disinfecting wipe in my hand. The weirdest part is half the people seemed unaffected and the other half seemed panicked, which I kinda understand. I vacillate between thinking we’re all overreacting and that we’re grossly under-reacting. I’m scared that we ..read more

I’m told today is siblings day. I suspect my brother, Jeremy, made this “holiday” up just to mess with me, but I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt and play along. I’ll start by saying I am blessed to have a brother who is generous, hard-working, and fun who has taken care of me for my entire life. While I’m confident my brother is in a league of his own, I’m certain the sibling relationship is pretty special for most people. There are a very limited number of people who have occupied the same womb as you—or at least I hope that’s the case. Watching each other develop through all the awkwar ..read more