By using assertive communication, you are opening the door to intimacy.     Being vulnerable means being authentic and being able to risk expressing your thoughts, feelings, and wishes. It means you are in control of yourself, not the relationship. Many people complain that they aren’t getting their needs met in an intimate relationship, but they don’t feel comfortable sharing their desires. Or, they fail to make requests in a positive, non-blameful way to begin with. Before you can begin to build successful relationships, you must have healthy self-esteem – which means believi ..read more

You didn’t expect to wind up back in the dating pool when you exchanged vows in front of your family and friends. Now you are alone again and longing for a new relationship. Whether you are happy or sad about it, it’s definitely not easy. Are you still hoping to find love again? If so, don’t despair. There is a great chance of finding just the right partner for you. In order to get to that goal, you will most likely have to go on a few dates. Avoid these 8 dating mistakes in order to give yourself the best chance of dating success. 1. Not taking time to heal is one of the costliest dating mis ..read more

  There is perhaps nothing more important in this life than building strong, healthy relationships with the people we love. But in order to do that, you first need to build a strong, healthy relationship with yourself. For many of us, that means learning to practice self-care by prioritizing our own spiritual and mental well-being. Addressing Your Mental Health In fact, there is perhaps no greater gift that you can give to your spouse or partner than the gift of a healthier, happier, and more fulfilled you. This article examines the role of mental health in a relationship and discusses h ..read more

  Being emotionally attractive is being in a place of comfort with yourself and being self-assured. You have your own baggage in check. You pretty much know who you are and you’re comfortable in your own skin and you can be patient with the people that you care about, you can be patient with yourself most of all.    As I have matured, I feel I know a little bit about women—just enough to be dangerous. My relationships have ranged from the most benign, to the most volatile with interesting challenges in between. I have also strived to make myself better so that I can be at my be ..read more

One of the most common questions that divorced moms ask me is: When will I know if a new partner is right for me and it’s time to introduce him to my children? My best answer is to take your time dating after divorce and don’t introduce your new love to your kids if you are dating casually or you’re unsure. While it’s normal to seek solace, companionship, and a sexual relationship after a breakup, it’s crucial to take it slow so you can assess whether this relationship is casual or might be long-lasting. If you are considering making a commitment to someone, you want to be sure that you’re co ..read more

  Post-divorce can leave you feeling unloved, unlovable, and terrified of trying to love again. Through examining my own weaknesses and faults in my failed marriage, I have discovered that love is an endless learning process. 8 Things Divorce Has Taught Me About Love Time gives both healing and perspectives, opening my eyes to some of the greatest lessons about love that will help me succeed in my next relationship. 1. Each person defines love differently How a person feels loved is based on one’s own needs and wants. However, these needs can be very different than your partner’s needs f ..read more

  Hello, my name is April, and I’m an “approval addict,” recovering with the occasional relapse. Approval addiction — the intense desire to obtain approval or avoid rejection from other people leads to certain habitual behaviors. Approval Seeking I am, for example, a recovering “performer.” In other words, I chased “gold stars” to get people to like me. A lot of women are “helpers.” They swoop in to save the day, never saying no to a request for help. “Chameleons” are shapeshifters. They change what they say, how they dress, and even the inflection of their voice depending on the company ..read more

  Part of being human means having emotional needs. We want to be loved and to give love. We want to feel we belong and have a sense of purpose. We want to feel self-esteem and respect from others. These are some of the most common needs, but individuals have emotional needs unique to them. In a healthy relationship, both of you understand the other’s primary emotional needs, and you both work to respond to them because you love and respect your partner. In order to get your emotional needs met in a relationship, you should discuss those needs with your relationship partner. It’s imperat ..read more

  I spoke with a client last week who is working her way through her third divorce. We were on the phone for an hour and she spent forty-five minutes talking about problems she had experienced in her first marriage. Problems that happen to be the same problems she is experiencing in her third marriage. She will soon have three ex-husbands that she still ruminates over, blames for her inability to have a successful marriage and spends an excessive amount of time talking about with anyone who will listen. Why is her head still stuck in her three failed marriages? Because she didn’t do the ..read more

You deserve to love and live after divorce. You deserve sex and intimacy after divorce!   Once those divorce papers are signed or perhaps after the initial separation between you and your ex, the idea of sex and intimacy after divorce can make someone feel one or two ways: Elated excitement, like when you were a kid and discovered where your parents hid the holiday gifts. You had to sneak a look right then and there! Awkward and uncomfortable, like when your wisdom teeth were removed, and you could barely slurp soup. Some people run right out for the first warm body upon divorce, and o ..read more