I often wrestle with what it means to be beautiful and how I live that out. I’m a huge believer that beauty shines from the inside out, but when it comes to what I see in the mirror, I can’t seem to apply that rubric. As someone currently struggling with my own self-esteem, I can assure you that logic doesn’t play much of a role in how I actually see myself. Meanwhile, the feminist in me struggles with my sincere love of makeup. I see all these underlying societal structures profiting off of my desire to level up my look. But these thoughts do nothing to tamper my passion for this kind of pam ..read more

I’m an objectively positive person. I realize it is odd to claim something that feels quite subjective, but actually, in doing some strength-based testing at my job, it turns out that I can claim “positivity” as one of my top five attributes. I shouldn’t be surprised. No matter my age, the most common compliment I have ever received was for my smile. Despite being able to see the good when many others can’t, I’m not consistently positive. In fact, in understanding my positivity more, I have come to realize that by being this way, I’m not protecting myself against negativity. My good attitude ..read more

Sometimes, when you can’t seem to find Lent, Lent finds you. Knowing me means knowing that I love the big two liturgical seasons in the church calendar. I didn’t grow up in a church that particularly focused on the liturgical calendar however we still intentionally entered into Lent and Advent. We participated in in our desire to draw nearer to God during these seasons. I remember my mom in particular living out these seasons in beautiful worship and obedience. I fell in love with them first because of how my mother was living out her faith, and then again as I practised living out these seas ..read more

We put the tree up last night. While it was only December 7th, it felt incredibly late to me. I have been stressing about this tree, worrying that we wouldn’t even find the time this season to get one up. We’ve been so busy with new routines and schedules lately. There’s nothing on the tree yet. For now, it is just a tree standing in a brand new Christmas tree stand (a quick purchase after water poured all over our hardwood floor while trying to water the new tree last night). This is the time to let the branches fall after they’ve spent so long tied up, bundled, and constrained. We had an id ..read more

It didn’t take me long to realize that the wait is better. December 26th would hit, and so would the let-down. I had waited all year for that one day, expecting it to be the best day ever! and it would already be over. I had another 365 days to wait for the next best day ever! I couldn’t keep expecting joy only on that one day each year. I needed more of it. Something had to change. That’s when I realized that living in anticipation of that day could be wonderful. It is the difference between experiencing Christmas day and experiencing the Christmas season. It is small lit ..read more

(psssst: I have to tell you that this post is sponsored by Netflix. But don’t let that make you click away. Because I need your suggestions. And also, I have something you can win… So, stick around, would ya?)  If you haven’t noticed yet, we’re in a new season. I mean, I guess it should have become clear to me as I started to dress my kids in shorts and began to juggle window and floor fans throughout the house to get maximum airflow and oh my goodness, I guess I need to put on sunscreen every day, (I say, after my third sunburn.) Summer season is here and I am in crisis mode. But, I’m n ..read more

(psssst: I have to tell you that this post is sponsored by Netflix. But don’t let that make you click away. The post is mostly about Love. And that’s fun-ish to read about, right?) Well, Valentine’s Day is long over, and if I’ve understood social media correctly then you’ve all be loving each other very well every day since, right? Because so many people “don’t celebrate Valentine’s Day” because they “don’t need a holiday telling them to love someone” and because they love their spouse “every day of the year” (as if all of us Valentine’s Day celebrants don’t?). And of course, that’s love ..read more

I see potential in everything. It is one of my charms, actually. I used to think it was optimism, but I think it is slightly more nuanced than that – especially because I can see potential without feeling optimistic. (And what a heartbreaking place that is to be.) This is why I usually love new years – time, in its essence, resetting – both January and September. I want to hold on to that new year smell all year round (do they make air fresheners for that?). I want to keep feeling like I can do anything – be anything – accomplish anything! I love new years. Except for when I don’t. I rem ..read more

Gavin asked Santa for Netflix on his Nintendo DS. (And here is where I say that this is one of my Netflix blog posts, written because I am a StreamTeam blogger but is actually a hilarious story I would have told regardless of whether I was sponsored by Netflix or not, so just keep reading!) It was the least we could do, really. A year ago on Christmas Eve his original DS broke, and transferring all his account info (including Netflix) was such a pain in the butt that when his second DS broke during Easter, we just never went through all that trouble again. His Christmas wish was jus ..read more

I know that Christmas can be a hard season for anyone over the age of 10. As a kid, Christmas is a day full to the brim with the wonder of newness and excitement and surprises and magic. But as we age, expectation slowly starts creeping in, fogging the light that is that Christmas wonder. Disappointment follows expectation and then we spend every Christmas just trying to get back to what it once was – for us and for our kids. Last night, hours into the third shopping day of a full shopping week, I found myself leaning over my shopping cart and burying my head in my hands. It had all finally j ..read more