Cat haiku: Whiskers twitch at night, Moonlit sake gently poured— Silent paws dance light. (No other usernames) —————————————————— I (26F) have been doing well for myself and my biggest mistake has been telling my ubpd mom (late 40s) that I’ve been doing well financially and have extra money in my budget for gifts. Mind you, she does very well herself, but she spends excessively. Anyway, I’m pretty minimalistic. Any time she notices something new on me, she makes a comment and says she’d also like what I have. But lately she’s been making a lot of comments around my money and alluding to me be ..read more

My kitties are cute One is shy, one is crazy I’ll cry when they go Hello all, first post here, throwaway. So glad to have found this sub. I am not sure what I’m looking for by posting this, maybe just to feel less alone or to get some advice maybe? It’s always hard giving advice when it comes to BPD I think, because everyone is at a different stage or wants different things out of life. Anyways. I have a complicated relationship with my uBPD mom. Especially being of asian heritage, where every family is “worse” and the culture seems to support the transmission of intergenerational trauma via ..read more

As I told you before, my mum improved, a 3 years ago a big problem for her health. To be vague, I will say, multiple joint problems, and back pain, she needed surgery to put back a piece in place. To maintain joint mobility and strength, she needs to do a lot of sports. At first, she loved sports, but now she doesn't see improvement anymore. Because she has back almost all her mobility, her strength, and have minimal pain. And I think she realised that she is not happier with a body without pain. One big thing is that she still wants to increase her mobility then decreases her effort to stabi ..read more

Have you ever confronted a BPD’s lies? My birth giver just came up with some telenovela plot including my dad. (They are divorced). I am livid. I want to call them on three way and expose the lie. I am so tired of my birth givers plots, cloak and dagger BS. If I confront it, will she likely back off from inventing more lies for a while? I live a healthy calm life, and the only toxic person in it, is her. Not that everyone is perfect, but she is the only toxic one. UGH. Anyway, it is my responsibility to make the decision, and will probably do it, but want to know if anyone else has walked dow ..read more

To whom I could feel anger or grudge? To mum for having this disorder? Definitely not. Yes, it pisses me off how this freaking disorder leads to absurd behaviours that have impacted her life, and thus my life as well. When she was a kid, she got poliomyelitis when she was 2. My grand mother was very sick mentally, diagnosed with NPD, alcoholism, most likely has ASD too, and made the family a complete chaos. Yet I also saw her kindness in her. And also... my grand mother was displaced by the ever lasting internal conflict of my country when she was a kid 2. God knows what other kind of abuse s ..read more

I was raised in a severely complex and sick motherly environment. My grand mother had many mental problems, my aunts tried to destroy my mom's and thus, my life. Being my mom, she always would tell me "it's us against the world" and I couldn't explain her rage attacks when I was a kid or teenager. Whenever I contradicted her, even if it was something intellectual she would get furious (if this was in front of others) she would call me traitor. Just during my 20's, and now 30's, I begin to realise how heavily traumatised and hurt she is, and how this has lead her to have this disorder. An ..read more

During 1st round of NC. uBPD mom decides to send me random pics of her deceased father and uncle followed by their childhood pics below it. I ignore her so she proceeds to tell me she’s hooking up with guys for a tractor repair??!! ? Throughout my childhood she would always take pictures of the deceased at the casket!!! How completely morbid is this!?! submitted by /u/Ok-Telephone24 [visit reddit] [comments ..read more

My uBPD stepmom has been throwing an escalating series of temper tantrums since I got engaged last summer. From freaking out about how "purposely attacked and humiliated" her during our engagement announcement (I wasn't, I was actually preoccupied being happy about the engagement and wasn't thinking about her, if you can believe such an outlandish tale) to deciding she wouldn't be coming to the wedding within a couple months of the engagement, long before we even set a date or made any plans at all.... she's clearly spiraling. Whose fault do you think that is? Mine of course! Who is responsib ..read more

I’ve been disowned for around a year. My BPD mother is sending gifts to my kids (4 & 7). Any advice? Upon introspection, I’m not worried about my kids, I believe it’s guilt for my mother. Current gift was caterpillars. submitted by /u/Cool_Introduction112 [visit reddit] [comments ..read more

Maybe I'm looking for reassurance, I don't know. Maybe I'm just realizing how damn hard it is. How do I be okay with never finding closure with BPDM? When we first moved out/kicked out 2 years ago, I wouldn't talk to her for at least half a year. I've come to accept that who my mother was died a long time ago. It's kind of like faking with an imposter. Her insanity wasn't as bad when we were little and there's always the good memories. But I feel like that version of her doesn't exist anymore. Like it's just pretend. She's extremely ill, diabetes, lupus, long QT, etc, and is almost 60. She us ..read more