Last week was very busy. Perhaps over my strengths and abilities. However I endure it. In the last few weeks we changed windows and doors on our house. A lot of cleaning for me is always hard on me. Last week we installed two air conditioning devices. Again it was a lot of cleaning. Mum returned shortly to be present for voting and some opthamologist checks up. She was very satisfied with the work that was done. During work many questions have arisen and a lot of things had to be solved. There is not a  student in my office any longer and I really miss some everyday things to be done ..read more

My mum is leaving for the cottage house in a few hours. To be honest I hardly wait. There has been a lot of criticism from her side in the last couple of days and I am on the edge. Nothing that I do is good enough. I am looking forward to being on my own for the next six, seven months. This winter was hard for me. My brother has deeply disappointed me. Nephews have their own life. I really have to turn to the next page of my book. I have realized that I am on my own and it is high time for me to find a life companion. I have been faithful to my ex for more than three years. He is still a lot o ..read more

In the last ten day I watched a play, a concert and an opera. I was really enjoying myself. I was with friends. In the last two weeks family relationships were much better than usual. Tomorrow my mum is leaving for the cottage house and again I will be on my own. I can hardly wait. I need my privacy again and I am looking forward to that. It is Saturday and I managed to do everything around the house. During my walk with the dog I purchased some stuff and in a minute or so I will drink coffee with B. dear friend of mine. After that I will clean my office and in the afternoon I am meeting my fr ..read more

In the last couple of days I have been up since very early in the morning. Although it is Sunday 8 AM, I have already walked my dog, have had a coffee in a nearby cafe, done some chores. In half an hour I am going to the church. In the afternoon there is drama class. Life repeats itself and days are lookalike. Spring is here in Croatia already, trees are blossoming and again the morning is very beautiful. I was on a date last Wednesday and it was a disaster. This time the man was not married but came to an exclusive cafe in flip flops and shorts. I felt that with his outfit he showed me total ..read more

On Friday our drama group performed in a neighboring town and today we will put on the play again nearby out little city. My mum is going to see us and I am all excited about that. I hope she will like our play. Dear friend of mine was there on Friday with her mum. I was truly happy about it. For today I have an extra ticket but so far no luck in giving it away. For the last seven years acting really changed me a lot. In a good way. And I am very thankful to be a part of this group of wonderful women. Actually I am very thankful for my life these days. I might not have a family on my own but t ..read more

Today was a difficult day. First last night I went to bed quite late and although I slept until 7 Am it was not enough. I went to the office and did some urgent matters when my mum called me and asked me to do her doctor’s appointment due to her physical rehabilitation. She had two back surgeries in the past and a stroke and walking is not her best asset. I went there, picked up the paperwork and went to the insurance commission for possible treatment. I waited for an hour and a half and her request was denied. I was very angry, so I went home for lunch, took a valium and rested a bit. My half ..read more

It has been a long day for me already. I got up at five, walked a cat and a dog, drank some coffee, cleaned the bathroom and changed my linens. Then I made some final statements for our company, ate lunch and went to sleep. Couple of minutes ago I came back from another long walk with my dog and cleaned the kitchen. The week was hard. I had too many things, some things were cancelled and I was in theaters two times. On Wednesday I organized it (ten days ago) and we watched a comedy called The system disintegration and last night I watched a well played and written monodrama by a known actor in ..read more

Although it is Sunday I woke up quite early. Actually before six o’clock in the morning. By now I have already walked the dog, have had some coffee, and attended a Sunday mass. In an hour I am going to my friend’s N. house to talk to him and his mum. A friend of mine recently told me that I am always either walking, working, or praying because I am an “action” kind of person. This is very true. I try every day to fill in with different activities to avoid thinking too much about myself, illness, life. When I recently went to psychotherapy I was forced to deal with schizophrenia not just for my ..read more

Like many others I have a lot of issues coming up practically every single day. I try to resolve as much as possible immediately but some things can not be solved in one day. One of my issues is that for a long time I have diminished the price of my work, and now I have changed my behavior and I am asking to be paid at least 60% of market price of similar work. Luckily that all worked out. Today the weather was crazy and I felt bad but after some afternoon naps and some walks I am feeling almost fine. The older nephew has trouble finding appropriate work and I am trying to help by looking for ..read more

I had a lot of work to do since New Year. I have managed to do everything that was necessary although a few things have to be also done in the next few days. The work concentration was fine. It is much easier for me to work in my new office that I moved into at the beginning of December. I have peace now because of that I am not distracted. I had to stop psychotherapy. Every time after the group session I could not sleep due to the fact that all these people’s stories had burdened me. I was the oldest one there with the most experience with schizophrenia. People were nice but unfortunately I h ..read more