TW medical trauma and family death Sorry I'm really nervous We recently discovered we were a system a few months back. (We're bodily 20) I think we're a system, but the only trauma we can think of is a single major medical trauma that happened when I was 4. There's pretty much nothing else in the memories department other than a few really strong memories after that until my grandma passed away when I was 13 (she was like a sister to me I saw her every day of my life she lived with us) I don't have amnesia when someone else fronts but I know when someone else is fronting and we have 11 headma ..read more

Unfortunately this has happened before. I don’t know if our abusers are possibly interfering and are threatening them so they ghost us, or we are simply too difficult to deal with having a RAMCOA/Programming history. It feels impossible to actually get help and heal. submitted by /u/unknownsysten23 [visit reddit] [comments ..read more

I as the host often feel stuck that i can't unfront plus I am unable to see the innerworld clearly like my headmade its all blurry like in a haze submitted by /u/saltysaline9898 [visit reddit] [comments ..read more

Our system is negotiating discussing switching hosts: she is mentally healthier than our current host that is out by default. There are things about her I am not fond of she can be insulting usually me, which I understand - I ignored her wishes, pleas for such a long time she finally revolted and forced her way to the front to be heard. She really wants a healthier environment(system) to live in. We've all decided it would be for the best to let her host and front. It worries me that the system is plotting against me - I have been hosting for the system a long time. (fear). But I am the one t ..read more

what do you guys do about the nightmares? i just woke up from the worst one ive had all year and it keeps invading my thoughts like a worm. someone tried to switch and help me calm down but i think im front stuck. how can i get rid of the nightmares? they always feel so vivid and real, i wish dreaming was a switch i could turn off submitted by /u/ConfidentMachine [visit reddit] [comments ..read more

I don’t know how else to word the title, but essentially: The host body (Justin) is regressing and in denial now that he has DID. What can we do for him when we front to help him come to terms with it? -Levi submitted by /u/AuthorPossible3091 [visit reddit] [comments ..read more

I had ECT done in my mid-late teens, it was an absolute last resort. I don't regret it, but the difference between how my DID affected me before and after is night and day. It's helped in some areas and has severely hindered others; immediately after I noticed it's definitely affected my memory for the worse, but it also made it easier for me to communicate with (some) alters. For others who have done ECT, is this relatable? How did it affect you? Google's not been much help unfortunately (including scholar). submitted by /u/47bulletsinmygunacc [visit reddit] [comments ..read more

At least one of my parts could stay awake for forever until bodily exhaustion forces me to fall asleep. I don’t know how to reason with this part. They feel free to be themselves and do whatever at night. They like how quiet it is and like being away from people. They don’t like people. I’ve tried negotiating with them, to have a later schedule + not quite so late. Doesn’t work. My sleep schedule is also all over the place. It’s not like I’m just going to bed super late around the same time every night (or should I say morning). It’s all over the place. And when I say I sleep odd times, it’s ..read more

Everything lines up to well. It's all to perfect. From me learning I'm a system to everything. It all makes to much sense. At this point I wouldn't say I'm crazy for thinking this nothing that bad had ever happend in my child hood, yes Iv been groomed and have been in multiple abusive relationships, that and I was isolated by an abuser for nearly three years. But it was nothing insane. Everyone's been through a few crappy friendships, and everyone's spent time alone. It feels like iv made everything up just to not feel alone. Even with my diagnoses it still feels like I'm six and I'm trying m ..read more

A few days ago the stress level went way up in our house. We started feeling the signs that comes before a split and we really dont want it to happen because we have been stable up until that pressure went up. I (the host, dan hello!) Keep feeling like im being mimicked (my words being repeated back to me and physical actions feel laggy) and i am not acting like i normally do. Am i being influenced by someone further back or is something else possibly happening ?Mimicked might not be the right word but its the only one i can mange for describing it Ive had a headache all night. I slept and st ..read more